How do I change my habits advice needed

fannytoot · December 2016

I haven't been here in a very long time. Like a lot of individuals it's now nearing new year and thoughts turn to healthier eating habits. I really would appreciate some advice. All my life I seemed to have struggled with my weight it feels like I can't enjoy food for the fear of gaining. I'm very clued up of how many calories I should be eating and what are healthy foods.
But it seems as if I can never lose more than two pounds? During these times I reavulate everything for example I would follow a diet of this . Breakfast 1 slice of whole grain bread with I small spoon of butter , lunch could be a light salad no dressing or a healthy wrap no added extras such as mayonnaise . Dinner a fillet of salmon small in size with lots of green veg. No added butter or oils. A snack would be oatmeal made with a splash of milk and water with 0 percent Greek yogurt on top . I would follow this religiously for a coupke of months .
During these times at points I was running 5 miles a day walking my dogs and on my feet all day. And this is what happens I either maintain or drop 2 pounds at the most ! It's so disheartening and frustrating . I know I am not cheating because I'm super strict
. After a couple of months frustration sets in and I go back to trying to starve the pounds off I will only eat something like a couple of pieces of toast or something else not unhealthy. Then even odder my weight just stays the same it never seems to drop no matter how hard I try .
I even tried to add weights in .
Recently to my horror my weight has even started to creep up much to my frustrations half starving myself isn't even maintaining anymore . I've also had bloods done at my doctors but they came back normal
The only recent changes have been my sleeping at night is erratic and I have started to drink a gin and slimline tonic every night because I feel so down.
If you have got this far listening to me moan then thankyou for listening.
The thing is I'm tired of this now I am stuck in a vicious circle of not being able to enjoy food . I see others who eat lots and manage to drop their weight. It's been like this nearly all my life . Even when I had flu last year I must have been the only person to put on 2 pounds ?? Really I am clueless now and fed up. I weigh about 8.12lb or 8st 13

Fuzzipeg · December 2016

I'm sorry to read all this is getting to you. I'm wondering how you are placed on BMI charts. I know for my height, if I were to weigh under 9 stone as you do would put me at the bottom of my normal range. I expect you are tiny. I doubt there is anything wrong with the way you are generally eating, are you eating out of habit being lax in portion size with familiarity? Its easy to do. Hope you can feel better soon.

kommodevaran · December 2016

You have to get rid of some ideas, learn some things, relearn some other things, and change your mindset, to permanently change habits.

You weigh around 125 pounds? I don't know how tall you are, but most likely, you don't have to lose weight, and what you are doing, keeps you at a (presumably) healthy weight, even though it stresses you out.

Weight fluctuates naturally, and you don't lose or gain a pound from one day to the next, that is just water and waste in your system. Weigh yourself daily, montlhy, or not at all.

There are no "healthy foods", there are more or less healthy diets. And healthy eating is not just about what you eat, but how you think and feel about what you eat.

New year resolutions usually fail. Make a commitment to a lifestyle you can stick to, all year round. This will be a way of life that is flexible and easy to maintain.

If you eat too little, you aren't going to lose weight, because you can't stick to it long enough to lose any weight. In all the time you have been in here (since 2012), have you tried to stick to the calorie goal MFP gave you? If not, why not? If you have, how did it go?

A bad diet combined with worry, will most likely interfere with your sleep. Add alcohol every night and you are making it even worse.

OK, so tighten things up. Set a realistic weight goal and let MFP determine your calorie allowance. Start to eat real, full meals every day. Plan meals you want to eat, and enjoy them. Log everything correctly and hit your calorie goal. Do this every day. Exercise if you want to. Weigh yourself regularly and be patient. This is all you have to do.

tiptoethruthetulips · December 2016

Exactly how tall are you and what is your goal weight?

fannytoot · December 2016

I am 5 ft 2 which is about 158cm . When I joined here I religiously stuck to my calorie goal that was so frustrating some days I was even under and still no changes. It feels as if I try to eat normally the weight seems to go on fast . Believe me when I say I know the calories of different foods. I weigh myself daily and have done so for the last 4 years. I just dont know what to do I feel miserable and puzzled. I wish I could enjoy food like normal people

kommodevaran · December 2016

Then you are either logging incorrect amounts or using incorrect entries, or your calorie need is lower than MFP presumes and has to be adjusted, or "eating normally" means that you slack off (cheat/sneak/forget - relax, we've all done that), and undereating and worry makes you want to eat more, and then you eat more.

Weight changes are s l o w. You CAN'T see a real difference before maybe a month. Eating less (too little) for a few days has no impact on your weight, but can have a great negative impact on your wellbeing.

There's a dynamic here - normal/healthy eating is enjoying food without worry, and keeping a normal weight, and when you enjoy eating without worriyng, you tend to eat normally/healthily, and then you'll keep a normal weight. What "feels" normal is not necessarily normal/healthy, it can be what you are used to, and more or less off.

Mumu190672 · December 2016

Unfortunately, at your height and weight your tdee is likely to be much lower than a taller person which means that your maintenance allows you to eat less than an average person.
The only way to increase it is to exercise more.
Still you should be able to lose weight even you are sedentary but it will be at a very slow pace.
You also need to be very strict with your logging and make sure you weigh everything with a food scale because you don't have a big margin for error.

kommodevaran · December 2016

PP mentions something interesting. I tried to grasp your idea of "normal", but I think I missed this - are you comparing your intake with larger people's? You can't do that. You have to eat for your own body. But that is not a bad thing - you will feel just as "full" and satisfied on what you need, as a larger person who eats what he/she needs.

jgnatca · December 2016

For sure you have to do something different to get a different result. Here's a few ideas.

1. Read Duhigg's book on Habit
2. Get this book too and run through its exercises. Following this books advice took all my guilt away from the weight loss enterprise.

https://www.bullpub.com/catalog/Living-a-Healthy-Life-with-Chronic-Conditions-4th-Edition

3. Make a list of all the foods you love.
4. Buy a food scale.
5. Figure out the appropriate portion of every food you love.
6. Make weekly behavioural goals instead of weight goals.
7. Weigh yourself only once a month at the same time of day following your monthly cycle. Put the result in to a weight trend tracker.
8. Make a list of fun rewards when you hit a behavioural goal (permanent habit change)
9. Find a better way to relax in the evening not related to alcohol.

vanmep · December 2016

You are right in the middle of the healthy BMI range. If you are not happy with the way you look, you might either want to learn to manage your mind, or try toning your muscles.

Fuzzipeg · December 2016

The idea of toning is a very good one were you to be able to join a gym you would meet more people against whom to access yourself. I think you would find there are many out there who would be happy at your size and weight. I can't eat as I did when I was younger our bodies change, (regrettably). I agree alcohol really does nothing for your sleep pattern or complexion either in the long term.

Something else I agree with is, eating foods you like and can really enjoy. I've been living with salicylate and histamine intolerance which restricted everything for me. Now I have found something which helps greatly with all this so for the first time in 10 15 years I have had Christmas and Boxing Day meals I have thoroughly enjoyed, my company was the same, its was only my digestive enzymes which were supported. For me Life is looking wonderful, having foods which I could enjoy was a revelation to me.

All the very best, and take care

kshama2001 · December 2016

fannytoot wrote: »

I am 5 ft 2 which is about 158cm . When I joined here I religiously stuck to my calorie goal that was so frustrating some days I was even under and still no changes. It feels as if I try to eat normally the weight seems to go on fast . Believe me when I say I know the calories of different foods. I weigh myself daily and have done so for the last 4 years. I just dont know what to do I feel miserable and puzzled. I wish I could enjoy food like normal people

So you are 5 ft 2" and 124 pounds - what's your goal weight? How many pounds are you trying to lose per week? I wonder if you have too aggressive a weekly weight loss goal and are undereating, which is raising your cortisol level, causing you to retain water.

http://www.bodyrecomposition.com/research-review/dietary-restraint-and-cortisol-levels-research-review.html/

...a group of women who scored higher on dietary restraint scores showed elevated baseline cortisol levels. By itself this might not be problematic, but as often as not, these types of dieters are drawn to extreme approaches to dieting.

They throw in a lot of intense exercise, try to cut calories very hard (and this often backfires if disinhibition is high; when these folks break they break) and cortisol levels go through the roof. That often causes cortisol mediated water retention (there are other mechanisms for this, mind you, leptin actually inhibits cortisol release and as it drops on a diet, cortisol levels go up further). Weight and fat loss appear to have stopped or at least slowed significantly. This is compounded even further in female dieters due to the vagaries of their menstrual cycle where water balance is changing enormously week to week anyhow.

And invariably, this type of psychology responds to the stall by going even harder. They attempt to cut calories harder, they start doing more activity. The cycle continues and gets worse. Harder dieting means more cortisol means more water retention means more dieting. Which backfires (other problems come in the long-term with this approach but you’ll have to wait for the book to read about that).

When what they should do is take a day or two off (even one day off from training, at least in men, let’s cortisol drop significantly). Raise calories, especially from carbohydrates. This helps cortisol to drop. More than that they need to find a way to freaking chill out. Meditation, yoga, get a massage... Get in the bath, candles, a little Enya, a glass of wine, have some you-time but please just chill.

How do I change my habits advice needed

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