How do you find balance between healthy and obsessive?

This is something that can be difficult. What has helped me when I've struggled with the same thing has been specifically paying attention to MFP posters who do not log every single bite and who seem to be pretty low key and still remain successful. After that, I don't have great advice because I just kind of force myself to take it slow. I had a very bad year last year wrt this issue so this year is going to be a long slow haul. Ugh. I just read that through and I don't think I'm being very helpful

Big picture thinking...diet wise, I eat well most of the time...treats here and there are irrelevant to the whole.

Exercise wise, I follow a training protocol for both my cycling and lifting...I follow the protocol...I don't deviate from the protocol...the protocol includes adequate rest as well as work at variable intensity levels. I understand that following the protocol is going to improve my fitness in the most efficient manner possible...going off protocol would be a detriment to my fitness.

I think this can happen to a lot of people. It did for me at least.

I had to back off for while and refocus on other things. I have about the same amount left to lose as you do. My focus for this last part of weight loss is on how I want to use this loss to better my future.

For ex:

I have started a more organized fitness plan that will help me do the things that I want to be able to do. I have no plans at this point to walk in a 1/2 marathon race but I am training to be able to do so if I choose.

I have a resistance program that will not only help maintain mobility as I get older but one that will also assist me in things that I want to...such as taking a backpacking vacation.

I am also developing my own recipes that I know will fit my nutritional needs not only to lose weight but maintain weight when I reach goal.

I am not saying to just ignore your calorie deficit but you have accomplished a great deal already. Maybe shift at least part of your focus over to things that you always wanted to do but the weight interfered with.

IOW...Start living your life

I think it's just a question of time. Losing a lot of weight is like a war, you have to put in so much energy and willpower and fight, it's no wonder that even when you get to goal, it still takes up a lot of mental energy. And if (like many of us), you've regained weight in the past, you live with a constant fear that it will happen again.

I doubt many successful dieters don't go through the same struggles, and like I say, I think it just takes time to find some balance again, and to build trust in yourself to take care of your body long term.

Wow... OP huge accomplishment! You rock! I would say what you are doing is totally working. Achieving a big goal over a long period of time takes focus and dedication. Some people may call that obsessive. So what?

How YOU feel about the balance of your thoughts and efforts seems a lot more meaningful.

To answer your question about how I balance it, I don't feel terrible if the day does not go according to plan. That's life. I just make up for it later or the next day or the next couple days. I know what you mean, though. I've been maintaining a long time, and that sort of means gaining and losing the last 5 pounds repeatedly--not as impressive as your accomplishment, but my frame of reference FWIW. When I first embark on a cut, I catch myself wanting to pass on some social occasions just so I can have more control. I catch myself, though, and overcome my introvert tendency because I do value social experiences with other people and intake control isn't a good enough reason to pass on that. So I go and adjust my plan for the day. Even if it is eating in a restaurant I don't especially like. Re: exercise, I plan one rest day/week. If I miss a workout because of weather or schedule blow-up, I just count it as my rest day and get my miles in on Sunday (nominal rest day). I do ST 3x/wk, and I can pretty easily tuck that into another day later in the week if I have to miss. And there is the occasional week I get in 2 ST, and nothing bad happens. Making an observation about myself, being closer to GW makes a flexible attitude more comfortable.

Best of luck to you, OP on the remaining 30-40.

theabbygrace wrote: »

Honestly, I do spend a lot of time thinking about food and calories and exercise. More time than I've admitted to anyone. It's one of the things I focus on most. I think I may be to the point of overdoing it, because when something doesn't go as planned, like I eat something I feel I shouldn't or I miss a workout, I feel absolutely HORRIBLE. I feel like I've failed and I'm going to start gaining back weight that I've worked so hard to lose.
So what do you guys do? How do you find your balance between the right amount of thought given to a healthy lifestyle and obsession?

I focus on other things.

While working full-time, I am also attending university part-time slowly making my way toward a Master's degree.

In addition to that, I'm quite heavily involved in my cycling club -- organising, riding, and training for events.

In my spare time, I've got a list of projects a mile long to tackle.


Therefore, food becomes a background thing. I eat certain things at certain times. It becomes a habit.

And I plan for diet breaks. For example, I'm on the diet right now until the Australia Day long weekend. Then I'll take a 4-day diet break. I don't plan to go crazy, but I will likely be travelling and won't know how many calories are in things, so I won't bother logging, and since I plan to be cycling a lot, I'll probably eat a bit more than usual. After the weekend, I'll resume the diet.

Machka9 wrote: »

theabbygrace wrote: »

Honestly, I do spend a lot of time thinking about food and calories and exercise. More time than I've admitted to anyone. It's one of the things I focus on most. I think I may be to the point of overdoing it, because when something doesn't go as planned, like I eat something I feel I shouldn't or I miss a workout, I feel absolutely HORRIBLE. I feel like I've failed and I'm going to start gaining back weight that I've worked so hard to lose.
So what do you guys do? How do you find your balance between the right amount of thought given to a healthy lifestyle and obsession?

I focus on other things.

While working full-time, I am also attending university part-time slowly making my way toward a Master's degree.

In addition to that, I'm quite heavily involved in my cycling club -- organising, riding, and training for events.

In my spare time, I've got a list of projects a mile long to tackle.


Therefore, food becomes a background thing. I eat certain things at certain times. It becomes a habit.

And I plan for diet breaks. For example, I'm on the diet right now until the Australia Day long weekend. Then I'll take a 4-day diet break. I don't plan to go crazy, but I will likely be travelling and won't know how many calories are in things, so I won't bother logging, and since I plan to be cycling a lot, I'll probably eat a bit more than usual. After the weekend, I'll resume the diet.

If you feel horrible when you eat something wrong and you feel you spend too much time thinking about it, then yes it has become unhealthy.

Never feel guilty for eating. If you think about it logically it just makes no sense-guilt, such a strong potent negative emotion, being trigger simply by fuelling your body.

All I can offer are words of support because honestly-I do exactly the same. I need control and if I lose control I beat myself up.

I do try and think logically as stated above when it happens to try and get out of the negative cycle. It takes time. And persistently reminding yourself that negativity doesn't help anything

Good luck xx

This is the bit that I need to master, I lost 75lb and put 50 of it back when I lost focus. So now starting again I need to be obsessive, for at least this year, to get back down, then like you I need to work on the hard bit and keeping it off and moving back into a maintenance mode..... If you find the answer let me know

I'm in auto pilot sometimes, and have a good routine with eating and exercise.
Other times I feel thrown-off and need to log and give those things my attention. If I want to keep in a good direction that is.