What I remember about being "Skinny"

This story sounds a lot like mine.

We have to just focus on the little things - because that's what got us here in the first place. Finding the little things that we hated and blowing them out of proportion. Now we have to find the little things that we like. For example, even though I'm a bigger girl, I like that I still have a defined waist. Or I like how my forearms look slimmer and tanner.

Soon those things will overpower the bad.

Honestly, what you are describing sounds like it has aboslutely nothing to do with your actual weight or your actual outward appearance at all. I do not think you will make any kind of mental change simply by altering your eating habits and exercise patterns. I strongly encourage some kind of counseling to figure out where those emotions/feelings have come from and how to change them. While getting healthier physically (losing weight) is an important step for your future so is getting healthier mentally. If you can't do counseling, which I think would be best, you could try self-help books or something on the subject of gaining an image of "self", gaining confidence. I personally don't think it will just COME.

Good luck on your journey. You are worth it!

This is TOTALLY my story too! I am 5'10'' and down to 155 after a year of working very hard. (I honestly don't remember when I've been this thin.) In high school I was very fit and also curvy and I thought I was fat... I'm also struggling with the "image" in the mirror. I keep thinking, "I can lose 5 more..." etc... I don't have an answer but just know you are not alone!!!

I can totally relate to this. Someone posted a picture of me from high school on Facebook this weekend and I couldn't believe how skinny I looked. Then I remembered that I had thought I was fat at that time. I can't believe I spent so much time in high school worrying about how big I was and now look at me... I have over 100 pounds to lose.

I am sure those negative feelings towards myself contributed to my weight gain. Boy, if we had it to do over again...

i wish i could help you but in all honesty i was there in that tube w you


thats not true ive been battling

i try to compliment the body parts i like and even those that arent where i want them to be i remind myself that they are strong. that I AM STRONG. i am built like my mother who although shorter than me is a power house we are a lot of muscle built on a small frame.
i was the smallest ever when i graduated highschool but was mentally and physically not in a good place and even THEN i didn't love my body.
one thing i've noticed is that its hard to see change because we see ourselves everday in the mirror the slow progression escapes us. i took 'start' pictures 2 weeks ago and there will be more in a week and in 3 more weeks and in 3 more weeks etc that way i can't dispute all the hard work and eating right are working and that i have the power to change my body

Amazing how much like me it is too. I am 5'5" and I at my thinnest can only weigh 150 due to my bone structure. My husband is 5' 7" and is much smaller than me. My sister is always been tiny and can wear the tiny cute clothes and it does make you lack confidence within your self. I did sports and I used that to justify my larger size. I wore a size 12 in high school, while most of my girlfriends were a size 5. I understand you...if you look at my wedding pictures too..not true happiness in my eyes either.

But, like you..I am getting there.

I know exactly what you mean! When I think back to my late teens early 20s and remember the body I had, holy crap! I didn't know what I had. I remember hiding myself in shorts and tshirts at the beach, and not wearing clothes that I would love to wear now...but really can't now! I was never a super skinny person, always very athletic so I had a muscular frame which i'm trying to get back!
In University I lived with a girl that was super tiny! We both put a lot of weight on in the first year and her highest weight was probably my weight at my skinniest as an adult! Then in our 2nd year we started to work out and eat right. We both basically ate the same food and worked out the same...and of course she went down to a size zero and I was in an 8. An 8 is amazing when I think about it now...but it was difficult then comparing myself to her. Then one day she told me she was jealous of me, of my curves, my round butt and boobs. She said she would love to have my body! I was shocked! From that day I started looking at the positives that I had. Not everything was perfect...but realized that when I looked at other people I only looked at their positives and would think wow...look at her toned arms. I wasn't looking at their imperfections...so why do I focus on mine? That's when my negative outlook turned to a postive and I would rock a bikini and chant to myself "people are looking at your great boobs and not the cellulite on the back of your legs"....and it worked!! Now that i've had a baby it's a little different. I went to a really negative body image after giving birth and it's taken 8 months to start to turn back to the positive. I decided i'm not going to put a weight goal down for myself. That turns into a battle with the scale every week...and not seeing a result that I wanted would put me in a very negative place (and usually a binge eating frenzy!) Instead I decided I wanted to accomplish things. I wanted to be a runner. Runners always look so fit and have so much energy. So 4 months ago I joined a learn to run group and now i'm training for a 10km. I've run a couple 5km and love it. The feeling of accomplishing a run, faster than my last run is a great measurement. Although I still weigh myself, I don't put pressure on myself because I know i'm gaining much needed muscle to move me faster and further.

I guess there's no specific answer to your questions. Only you will know how to answer those! But I do know that you can change that way of thinking negatively about yourself. You control your thoughts, no one else. You are the only one that has the power to make yourself happy (or sad). Like most people, you probably will never be 100% satisfied with what you see in the mirror...so stop trying to find it! Pick your positive features and love them, pamper them! Guarenteed someone is jealous of what you've got!

THANK YOU!!!! Thank you for posting this.. it is so obvious that so many women beat themselves up over their body image. You are not alone,. I think everyone on this sight has probably gone through this and that's why we are here. Thank you for having the courage to post this as I have had these same thoughts and feelings my whole life. But its really hard to change the outside until you've changed the menal state on the inside. I used to hate my body in highsshool (but I was in the best shape of my life). Now I have to remind myself to keep my thoughts positive!
Positive thoughts turn into positive words turn into positive actions!Thanks again!

How this happened to me? It happened by having family members always comparing me to the toothpick of my cousin who was a size 3-5. I was very athletic but NEVER good/skinny enough for my family. When I look back and look at my pictures from junior high and high school I wasn't ****ing fat!!!!!!!!! I was normal FFS!!! They would always call my sister and me, the big girls. When I would get second helpings, they would say "oh just let her eat, she has a huge appetite", of course I did, I was in a lot of sports and always doing exercise! Up to this day, my sister has lost 60lbs + and when I go to family gatherings (Christmas, etc etc) my aunts/uncles tell me how fat I am and how beautiful my sister is and how I should lose weight so I can LOOK BEAUTIFUL TOO...

W.....T........ F. I am sick of this s^it. Do you realize how humiliating this is? Do you realize how it makes my morale drop to the floor? My mom once told me a few months ago before I started my diet, "Oh, Julie, you will always be fat, maybe it's time you start looking for clothes that will go with your body shape and not make you look terrible". UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

This time, I am losing weight for my OWN sanity, for my health and because I am sick of people telling me these humiliating stabs. I am working so hard so when I see them in November - Thanksgiving and they are all, "oohhhh ahhhh look at you, look at all the weight you lost" I will tell them. I did it for MYSELF and so people can stop *****ing at me and point their finger on someone else for a change. ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!!!

THIS IS HOW SOMEONE CAN COME TO A POINT OF HAVING LITTLE TO NO SELF ESTEEM!!!


Edit : wow, this took a lot to admit. I am at the point of tears

Confidence & sexiness are not an attribute - they are a state of mind. Dream it - be it. I work with the most gorgeous chocolate woman I have ever met. Her smile is big and contagious. Her skin has virtually no flaws. And she always has something nice to say or in the very least, a friendly greeting. She weighs almost 300# and is approx. the same height as me. She's beautiful. Her *kitten* is (and I'm not kidding you) 3x wider than yours (well, what I remember of it anyway) Point of the story, don't rely on the numbers on a scale to make you happy & confident. If you do rely on them, you will never be happy.

You are beautiful. Look in the mirror and say it out loud, 10x. Find one thing a day that you love about your body and focus on that.
You gotta ac-cen-tuate the POSITIVE, e-lim-inate the NEGATIVE....