Anyone else going through this?

Veggie_mama · February 2017

I have struggled with my weight my entire life. My smallest weight was 163 and I was a size 10. My heaviest was 330+ lbs (I don't know the exact number over that because I stopped weighing myself due to embarrassment). I met my present spouse at 210 lbs and lost the weight, getting down to the 163 lbs. I had 2 pregnancies back-to-back and gained weight, getting up to 245 lbs. I've lost 30 of that and my husband tells me everything I do is wrong when it comes to trying to lose weight. He believes that I can lose weight by just watching calories and fat. He doesn't understand why I'm not losing weight. I do watch calories and fat. I try to work out 3 days a week, but with getting my son up in the mornings, getting him and myself ready, working through the day, getting home and doing homework and making the dinner and getting things ready for the next day and doing cleanup (housework and cleaning up from dinner) and giving my son his bath, I don't have the energy. My day starts at 5:15am and I fall into bed exhausted at 8:30pm. My husband does not exercise, he works 10 hour days 4 days a week. He has a high metabolism and eats whatever and doesn't gain weight.
Am I just failing? Does anyone else have someone in their life that doesn't support them? Does anyone else just feel like they are in this completely alone?
I'm sorry if this sounds whiny, I'm just at a loss.

happysherri · February 2017

O Wow! I'm exhausted just reading that!!! You are one busy momma! Fortunately I have supportive people in my life, however I'm so stubborn that I would do it for me anyway. When my kids were little I mainly worked out at home, I would actually try to have them join me and follow my videos which led to my daughter now 20 yrs old to be aware of fitness (my son doesn't care lol). My ex-husband didn't really say much, once he said 'you look good'. My boyfriend now goes to the gym with me and we enjoy it so much. We don't talk much during because we are working hard and focusing on what we're doing but we love the time together. My boyfriend is very supportive - he will even eat new healthy recipes that I make.

Not sure the full story, but keep trying, never give up. And the MOST IMPORTANT thing - Do it for YOU!

serindipte · February 2017

You can lose weight just by watching calories. (Weighing, measuring, logging and sticking to a deficit, to be exact)

You don't even have to "watch fat". Fat is not the enemy unless you eat enough to go over your calories. Fat can be very good, in fact. It helps keep you more satiated which decreases hunger and prevents over eating.

You can lose weight without a single work out. (Not that working out isn't a good thing, but it isn't required)

Sorry he's being a butt. You can do this, though!!

Geocitiesuser · February 2017

Not trying to be a "mean person" but if you were watching your calories you'd be losing weight (probably very quickly), even without additional exercise. It is physically impossible for you to stay that weight if you are honestly only eating 2,000 calories a day. Physically impossible.

SisterSueGetsFit · February 2017

Just keep at it and you should see results. Are you weighing your food? Sometimes it's easy to eat more than you think you are. Are you logging everything into MFP? How many calories has the website given you daily and what are you consuming on a daily average? I lost most of my weight (50 pounds) without doing too much more than just walking.

I'm sorry that your husband is not being supportive. Unfortunately, this is a journey we need to take by ourselves. I'm lucky to have supportive people in my life, but I've learned to only rely on myself.

Please add me as support if you're looking for friends.

Moonlitriver17 · February 2017

I've lost 55 pounds, by tracking and controlling my calories. I'm not worried about fat, but avoid sugar. I count the calories, and that's how I've lost it. It's a great secret, because it's true.

tristramtrent · February 2017

Feel free to add me as a supportive friend. I too have struggled with my weight all my life even since childhood while my partners have had no such problem, in fact eating what my now partner eats got me up to my heaviest ever. I'm losing weight but still I suspect he does not know how hard I have to work to get the weight off. I get a lot of support from my friends on mfp, it is amazingly helpful and I don't feel alone with this site to log into every day and finding so many people share this problem.

Brans34 · February 2017

I'm sorry you're going through this. I now have an ex for the same reasons. Of course my ex added a case of beer to the equation and got insanely hateful (calling me all sorts of obscene names; I MUST have been sleeping with someone rather than going to the gym, etc.). However, I have recently (over the last 2 months) lost 20 pounds without working out at all and strictly staying at/under my calorie limit. I don't keep anything out of my diet or "off limits," I just eat less of it.
Yesterday, I had a hotdog with a slice of cheese and bread for lunch, then 2 slices of pizza for dinner, and 4 Hershey's kisses for desert. Yeah, it wasn't a "healthy" day, but I'm still losing. Just weigh your food and track EVERYTHING you eat and it will come off. Just don't give up. Regardless of what your husband says, you have to do what's right for you to live a long time for that little man that's sucking your energy. And after you lose a few pounds, you'll have even more energy so maybe you won't fall into bed at 8:30...maybe. I'm still ready for bed by then most of the time, too. :-/

Anyone else going through this?

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