Why are ex's so strange?

Okay thank you SO much for your responses... and let me continue with my story by saying he is very emotionally needy. I was incredibly patient, to the point where I wondered why I was that way. I really tried to help him, and encouraged him to get therapy a lot. I'm extremely independent and can juggle 50 million things at once, and even the smallest thing would set him over the edge. But still I cared and worried about him.

He did admit he didn't know his *kitten* from his elbow when he met me, and he was very confused but liked me a lot. Anyways, long story short, I never fully felt at ease with him, like I think you should in a relationship. (Gut reaction of something not right) Several things that would bother me was that he strangely would stare at other women, and I don't mean glance, but actually hold the stare too long, and he added and would talk to random fb or myspace girls all the time. He never made me feel secure, and I'm quite attractive, and usually very secure with myself. So then he threw it back at me, like I was the one with the problem. That infuriated me that he didn't at least try to see my point of view.

Anyways, I was disappointed in a lot of ways, and without getting to into it, we had different "drives" shall I say, and many other communication issues. EVERYTHING was a drama to him. And I kind of think he still wants some of that in his life, because it keeps his mind busy. Oh yeah and one other thing that bothered me, and tell me what you think... no matter how much other women or his friends use him, and he cries to me and complained, he would still be friends with them, or date them. He started to date some girl who cheated on him, and took advantage of all of his money, but yet he says She's just SO nice... wtf? Did I mention he called me two of his ex's names on different occasions. He's definitely not the brightest bulb. I was a freakin Goddess to him, and look what I got.... so much for being nice and patient I guess. He's kind of like a 34 year old in a 16 year old teenage boy mentality... or 8... I teach kids, and he acts like my kids some times. To be fair to him, there were some qualities that were nice... but I just don't think he had a clue on how to act with me.

So YES, I did cut off ALL communication. It was hard, I'm not going to lie, but I constantly went over the horrible sad feeling I had, whenever I dealt with him. He was respectful of it after a while of trying. But it sparked back up again for some reason. Hopefully now he has gotten the point. I don't like him texting my pet name he had, and other things. It's just kind of strange to me. Mind you, and to be totally fair, he isn't some cheating a..hole, although in the heat of his ranting he has called me some really mean things. But I could list a million things negative, to maybe 8 or so positives. Such a shame. But it's all a learning process!!

Okay so to respond to your posts...

Ajonthetquitar: I'm not sure he wants closure, if anything he wants to make sure we're still friends and I still care about him. He says that's very important to him. Mind you he's SUPER sensitive. And also I'm sorry you were heartbroken too. Believe me I was crushed when he started dating the new girl, and jumped into it seemingly fast, after I had spent so much time building him up.

TromaRon: You are ABSOLUTELY right!! Ex's are strange.

Goddess2B: You are Exactly right too. He NEVER has known what he wants. He put me through a mind-f of confusion for a long time. He's lost and trying to find himself. What I noticed, was after the years I had known him he made NO progress in personal growth and it really worried me.

Bjshooter: I definitely think he wants the idea of having me there, just in case... it's like he contacts me, as if to say don't forget about me, because maybe down the road we can still be an option. He definitely knows how to push buttons, and I also know what will push his, so I don't respond because it'll start his drama all over again. I kind of feel like he wants to always see what's out there, but knows me, and that I was a good thing, and so wants me to think of him in some good light.

Phanessa Thank you honey! We have let each other go to the point of less contact, but it seems we also are trying to resolve ever nuance of what went wrong. And he won't stop. Hopefully today was the last conversation on that.

I mean how much does it suck, to think the next time you hang out, that he'll call you by an ex' s name, or bring up some other crap. It's exhausting.

Heatherbelle_87 Thank you, and I might be a challenge to him, think I always was, but I made it clear that I have no feelings or interest in him.

Guyonthego: LOVE that!! Thank you!! Haha...

Porcelain_Doll... I just wish he'd leave is confusion to himself. I told him plenty of times, "You'll find the right girl, or maybe that one was the right girl." And he'll say "Well, Maybe you're the one I'm supposed to be with." In which I tell him to hush, never going to happen.

SarahofTwins, I hadn't talked to him (text and im, but not on phone) until last night. And one of the first things he asked was if I was dating anyone. I told him I really didn't want to talk about it. So he went on about how he's single but was dating this girl... yada yada, I don't know if he's trying to be a friend, or trying to make me jealous... I didn't understand that point of the convo.

Blink1021: One of my ex's has been my best friend for about what 14 years now. He knows everything about me. So it is possible for ex's to be friends. I have been really lucky and dated good guys, thankfully so far. But you're right, I think he just wants that attention. And yes I think his ego was very damaged. And he'll say that the other girl was sweet..etc... but she used him for anything she could, obviously she was going to be. But he doesn't get that. Mind you he knows that I was great, loving, and sweet, he just wanted me to see more good in him, but unfortunately I never felt like he showed me any, to be able to give him that positive feedback, ya know.

Jennfur2610 Thanks honey!! Yes I think this fall I'll start trying to date again, when I know my schedule better, and have time.

Ajontheguitar: I don't know if damning is motives.... but honestly just scratching my head of what he wants. I guess it's just to remain on friendly terms.

Ste73: If he wanted to get back together, wouldn't he just say that? Or are you saying he just wants that on the back burner, unless something else comes along? As in, he doesn't want to burn bridges?

Heatherbelle_87: You think it's a narcissistic intention... my friends and mom think the same thing too. Interesting.

Mishelnkiki: Ohh I hope that your situation is safe. Mine is. He wouldn't do that. He has gotten psycho, where when the relationship was coming to an end he would get extremely upset, talk suicide, blow up my phone with texts, and mean voicemails... it was bad. But not your situation bad.

Voluptas: Ooh girl, I've done that. When I have completely ignored his texts then it was followed by another one, then another one, and then sometimes when I ignore it, it works... it just depends on his mood on that day I guess.

Thanks everyone. I think I will ignore it from now on. I hope we're fine and on good terms, hopefully today's im conversation has given a lot of closure to things. Who knows, but I'm excited to actually meet new people... hopefully a normal one!!!

Much love and thanks for the support and stories!!