Friends can only take you so far

Okay. I've been on this site for a little over a month. It's helped me learn to eat better and it's nice talking to people about things that you wouldn't normally than with those that you may feel like don't understand the problems of weight loss. I get it, this is a good place for support. But I don't know if it's just me or not but lately I've seen so many people asking for help when they are plateauing or not losing weight at all to begin with. I don't wanna play Dr. Phil here but it's right there in the post what the issue usually is.

If you make a post and say something like, "I'm trying to limit my food intake but it's so hard" (blanket statement example) then you may not be ready to do this at all. What happened to old fashioned will power? Determination? Looking yourself in the eye and saying, "I can do better. I will do better."? You have the power to say no. You're the adult.

Say you live in a famliy environment and nobody else wants/needs to change themselves. They like cookies, you like cookies. You don't have to eat the cookie just because it's in the house! The other choice is to eat it, log it and compromise with something else in the day, e.g. a smaller portion for dinner or a salad instead. McDonald's can even be on the list but make smart choices. You don't have to "give up" anything but just be smart about it. Unless it's an extreme medical condition, what it always comes down to is your choice.

Learn what real hunger feels like and not boredom. Communicate with your body. If you try a new "healthier" food and don't like it, then don't eat it. You'll never reach your goal if you are miseriable the whole journey. You have to enjoy life or what's the point of changing to be healthier? A longer life of just being unhappy?

The cold hard truth is this: losing weight is hard. It's a lifestyle change for many of us that have 50 - 100+ lbs to tackle. There is no "cheating" or falling off the wagon. It's learning how to understand your body and nurture it like you wanna keep it for a while. It's your body, it should always come first.

Personally I have had to learn to eat more. I was eating the wrong food all the time then offsetting it by not eating for almost 2 days sometimes. My body was a wreck and I ignored it. But I've since learned to listen to what it's telling me and catering to those needs, but I make the final decision, not my urges.

This site is great to get on and read inspirational stories, get recipies, blow off steam and make new friends. The friends I have on here are FANTASTIC. They are confident, optimistic, level headed, down to earth, world-class sexy people. We pat each other on the back and when we need it, we ask to be patted. But at the end of the day it's me who I have to answer to. Same goes for them; same for everyone.

And here is what a lot of people are not going to like to hear: If you are not losing weight, it is your fault. It is something you are doing or not doing *ehrmexcersisehrm* and you need to pinpoint what that is. It's true our bodies vary, you can see that standing next to one another. However how our bodies function is not all that different. If they did all work differently we would all be on specialized food disiplines and couldn't all use this site the same way. So "all our bodies is different" is complete malarky to me. It's something in your lifestyle that still needs to change.

In closing I apologize if I presented myself as too rash but the truth hurts. We all discovered that when we accepted that we needed to lose weight. Tough love, sink or swim-- choose your phrase but if you aren't hard on yourself then you aren't serious enough about this to make a significant difference. We are here for each other and we always will be. You need to be there for yourself too.