What is the "point" of adding friends on MFP?



  • ritzvin
    ritzvin Posts: 2,849 Member
    edited February 2017

    I can totally relate to this. I ended up turning off the option to post "weight loss", "days logged" etc etc on my newsfeed, and I never close my diary, because i hate the attention it directed toward me, if that make sense? Simply, i was embarrassed by the the rah rah rah's, even though they were all being nice and supportive, I just don't like the spotlight on me.

    I didn't even realize you could turn those off.. the weight loss one is annoying (I weigh everyday- so the numbers it posts are nonsense fluctuations).
  • UltimateTrashBae
    UltimateTrashBae Posts: 181 Member
    I love having a lot of likes and comments on my progress. It makes me feel like my hard work is noticed. It also feels nice to be supportive of others' progress. It's all very uplifting for me. Makes me want to keep kicking butt.
  • JennyRATL
    JennyRATL Posts: 199 Member
    When I first started on MFP, my only friends were people I was friends with IRL, like 3 of them. Didn't stay on track very well.This time around, I've built a nice friend base and feel it has helped me a lot. I am motivated (and slightly competitive) by seeing others' workouts and diaries! And I like the social aspect, since I don't do much FB or other SM platform. I like seeing my friends here cheer me on! It doesn't feel as personal since they are strangers when they cheer or hold me accountable.

    I like that I can always talk about what I'm doing here without getting bothersome, since everyone here is working on their fitness! And accountability by strangers feels less thorny than when my husband tells me to go workout! :/

    And the knowledge base is great.
    I accept and request. Mostly to and from women who are in the same boat/age range/stage of life, but I have a few friends that are young whippersnappers. They're fun and cute! I rarely accept male requests, unless they seem on the up and up and not just horndogs. If a guy has like 100 friends and they are all hot females, bye. Although I guess I should feel slightly validated? :D
  • RunningMom1038
    RunningMom1038 Posts: 145 Member
    I love having MFP friends! Of course....my friends are awesome. Who wouldn't love them?

    The point for me is I love the chit-chat, giving and receiving virtual high fives and pats on the back, and the inspiration I get from some of them. They care about my successes when no one else does. They get it when I'm stoked about reaching a new personal best running time or reaching a weight-loss goal. Some people prefer to get all that from "real life" friends, but I don't have any who understand the concept of weight-loss by eating less. They actually balk at the idea when they find out that's how I'm losing weight. So, that's the "point" for me.
  • _MotherSuperior_
    _MotherSuperior_ Posts: 158 Member
    MeganAM89 wrote: »
    Sometimes nudes happen

    This gif illustrates what's about to happen to you. Each hotdog represents over 9000 unique FRs.
  • _BrewingAZ_
    _BrewingAZ_ Posts: 252 Member
    MeganAM89 wrote: »
    Sometimes nudes happen

    So that's why I never get friend requests! :D
  • ThatUserNameIsAllReadyTaken
    ThatUserNameIsAllReadyTaken Posts: 1,530 Member
    edited February 2017
    It's nice to have support. Now, not every single one of my friends are constantly commenting and cheering me on, and I don't always get to comment and cheer everyone else on as much as I would like. But I do have a lot of great people here who have helped me through some rough patches. I hope I have been the same to them when they needed it. I don't want to get too many friends though. I think once I had 30, 50, 100 or more friends I would fail to be a friend because that is a lot of people to lend support to. Who has several hours a day to comment and conversate with that many people? So I keep mine to 20 max give or take maybe 2-3.

    The quality of friends matters also. If I see people in the forums being A wholes to others on a regular basis I would definitely not add those people. If I am not sure about a friend request I message the person and ask who they are and where they saw me. Typically my requests tend to come from friends I see in comments on other friends posts so I kind of have a circle of people who are all mostly friends with one another.
  • tinkerbellang83
    tinkerbellang83 Posts: 9,057 Member
    I have to concur with the support/motivation part. I've previously used MFP with no friends but don't think I've ever got past 10-14 days, since adding MFP friends from the community I'm currently at 46 days of logging in, logging properly and have lost around 8kg.

    My offline friends couldn't give a *kitten* if I lose weight (for their sins they like me whether I am fat or skinny :lol:), I tried to get a few of them who wanted to lose weight to add the app to help motivate them and me, they either haven't bothered or haven't stuck it out. It's nice to have some people for accountability and to offer the same for them. I don't comment constantly but if I see someone is having a rough day/not sure of something on their status I am happy to try and cheer them up or offer some advice.

    This time around I need to do it for my health so that has helped motivate me more than before and I am taking it seriously. Both the friends and the community are helping me stick at it.
  • Gisel2015
    Gisel2015 Posts: 4,034 Member
    I had a small hand full few years back but I am now flying solo and I like it. What I eat and how much I exercise are my doing and decision, and I don't want to be interacting all the time or reading what ever is posted on my wall; too much time spent on this website. I never send friend's request and I don't accept them either. I belong to one of the groups here in MFP and that's all I need and want.

    People have different needs and goals and it seems that social media is the "thing' now. I personally would love if this site had a feature that would allow me to only complete my diaries and kept away from forums.

    Time to go.
  • VeryKatie
    VeryKatie Posts: 5,878 Member
    The point is to make MFP more addicting. I mean... to help you to want to keep using it and succeed... :smirk:
  • GYATagain
    GYATagain Posts: 141 Member
    Have gone both routes. In the very beginning (Jan 2013) I had no friends and just got on with life by me, myself, and I. Lost 70#. Fast forward another year and I was struggling to maintain -left MFP - came back and thought, hey I'll try it differently this time. Requested/Accepted friends that seemed in a similar place - fast forward from that. It got WEIRD!! Only in that, there were some that got the angry posts going if they felt people (me) were not supportive enough by constantly - and I mean constantly - replying to their 1 million posts and everyday dairy entries that were exactly the same day after day. Anything fun and exciting, questions, real struggles - let's chat about it. Other than that it started driving me crazy all the constant hitting my phone with updates, news, whine, whine, whine. Now, I love a good wine - just not whine! Life threw some serious curve balls and I left MFP again - too many different pressures for this old brain. Now, I'm back just working on the maintaining and have just a couple of like minded friends that I get a kick out of..... Short of this long story - it really depends on your motivation and what you are looking to gain (or lose) from MFP.
  • pedermj2002
    pedermj2002 Posts: 180 Member
    For me, I have a habit of obsessing about things, to the point of annoying my friends and family about it. When I was ready to start here, I was already turning annoying about my biking. Add in the newly discovered simplicity of "count those calories already!", and I was ready to become somebody who talked about nothing else.

    With friends here, I can talk about those topics. I can brag about my progress. I can ask for their feedback on something I'm doing. And all of this is well received, since they're all doing the same things. All of us are obsessing about it, and it's all good.

    That's why I have them, and why I'm always willing to add more. I need that outlet, and maybe I can help somebody else be successful by being that outlet for them.
  • mom22dogs
    mom22dogs Posts: 470 Member
    I have a question - everyone keeps talking about your "feed" or "wall" that you can see people's updates, likes and comments. Where is this? I've never seen it. I guess I just come to the website and click on community and never noticed anything in the menu bar that said anything about a wall or feed.
  • joaniebalonie088
    joaniebalonie088 Posts: 93 Member
    I'm pretty self-motivated so don't need anyone to motivate me. But having friends helps me feel less frustrated with the roller-coaster nature of weight loss.

    It helps me feel better when I see others go through what I'm going through. I'll see someone post, "I'm doing everything right and I GAINED 2 pounds!" And it is nice to know I am not the only one :)
  • slomo22
    slomo22 Posts: 125 Member
    Momma says people on the internet want to kidnap me
  • Cylphin60
    Cylphin60 Posts: 863 Member
    I'm an old fashioned social media hater. That bit out of the way, I'm hooked up with quite a few here that are just good, solid people. We chat, banter and encourage back and forth and always offer support with our common goals.

    Doesn't mean I'm going to open a FB account or any of that lol, but the folks I "met" here - good peeps :)
  • jdscrubs32
    jdscrubs32 Posts: 513 Member
    Each to their own but I like having friends who have similar interests to me, be it lifting and running, so that I can learn from them and them from me regarding bulking & maintaining. However I like having a small group of friends, normally below 50 who interact and use this site for what it is meant to be, health and fitness, not for hooking up. There are plenty of dating sites for that.

    There is nothing worse than ghost friends. I dont see the point in becoming friends with someone if you or they arent going to interact with them and if you dont interact with any of your "friends" on this, there really isnt any point in accepting friend requests unless you simply want to have numbers.
  • bjdavidson964
    bjdavidson964 Posts: 266 Member
    I think it's like any other form of social media...some 'friends' will be supportive, some just want to get their own number of friends up. And...people come and go from myfitnesspal. I drifted away for almost a year, but of course, I'm back now that the weight is creeping back. Recently participated in a Zumbathon for 2 hrs and posted 1000+ calories burned...didn't get any comments from 'friends' ... not even a 'like'...lol. I also believe that some people have so many friends, that they only comment on, or 'like' the big things like weight loss entries. Otherwise it would be impossible. I purposely kept my friend limit to a manageable number that I thought I would be able to truly support. That number will be different for each person. In the end though...remember you're doing it for YOU!
  • JeromeBarry1
    JeromeBarry1 Posts: 10,182 Member
    It's the whole metaphysical conundrum of being an island or not.
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 26,263 Member
    As a generality, human beings are wired to respond to social norms. Through thousands of years of human history, fitting in with your group (tribe) was a major, major factor in whether your life was as happy/successful as it could be, or not. That's why 90% of us tend to listen to the same popuar music, wear basically the same clothes, eat the same fast foods, and consider ourselves totally unique. ;)

    In our daily life, many of us as fat people are surrounded by other fat people. We see a norm of over-eating, hear people make jokes and talk about the impossibility of losing weight, are served up c**p on TV/blogs/written matter that is unhelpful in various ways, etc.

    The social side of MFP - forums, friends, blogs, newsletters - is a counterbalance. It gives us a peer group where getting healthier is a common value, and can give us a different norm to move toward.

    Of course, every individual is different, and has different needs. The above is just a broad generalization. But having MFP as a virtual peer group did help me, I think, stay on track when many times it would've been easier and pleasanter to stop thinking about this weight-loss/health-improvement stuff.

    Also, other people's diets are boring to regular folks who :"just eat". MFP gave me a place to talk about it, get support/feedback, and spare my real life friends the tedium.