To Date or Not to Date My Workout Partner
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BeardedCowboyWarriorTx
Posts: 18 Member
in Chit-Chat
So a little background info... I am 40, a widower and devoted father of 2. My babies are my world. I lost my wife almost 4 years ago and broke up with my girlfriend almost a year ago. I ended it because her parents gave her constant CONSTANT grief about the 15 year age gap (I prefer to date women in the 21-30 age range). It made her miserable and I hated to see her that sad even though she was the love of my life....So bad break breakup.. So I gained weight after that.... Anyway, I was looking for a workout partner to help me get back in shape and found one. She is 21 and not in bad shape. We have been working out for 2 weeks. I've taught her a lot. I am naturally dominant and she is naturally submissive so its worked well. But now she wants to move it to the bed as also FWB. ANd she is a kinky girl lol. But my worry is... Can something like this work? She thinks so.... But I am not so sure. I tend to be the kind of guy who wants a steady woman in my life and to fall in love. Thoughts? Opinions? Advice?
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Replies
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My first thought.... Troll7
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LOL not a troll. But my friends were very split about it. I figured strangers would give more of an honest opinion.0
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A match made in heaven
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happilymegan wrote: »Okay then I would suggest choosing where you want her. In the gym or bed. But not both.
This.0 -
happilymegan wrote: »Okay then I would suggest choosing where you want her. In the gym or bed. But not both.
See I've had some of my friends tell me this and some say both could work and a couple tell not do either. I like to really think things out before I make a choice that affect more than just myself. This is kind of totally new to me lol.
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She's 21. You're 40. Have fun with her if she's down for it but if you're looking for more, good luck with that one. Just be prepared to lose your work out partner when things go south. Also, honestly, it's really creepy that you're 40 and going after chicks that young. JMHO.
Women around my age usually are boring. Me and my kiddos spend almost every night and weekend either volunteering, or having fun. That's to much for women around my age that I've met. Besides, I want more kiddos one day. Most women around 40 are done having babies.0 -
This is why I'm excited to almost be out of the 20s
30s is a good age range... too old for the creepy "I prefer young girls borderline pedo men" and too young for the "milf fetishists"
It's gonna be great! 
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happilymegan wrote: »She's 21. You're 40. Have fun with her if she's down for it but if you're looking for more, good luck with that one. Just be prepared to lose your work out partner when things go south. Also, honestly, it's really creepy that you're 40 and going after chicks that young. JMHO.
I agree although I can't blame him for wanting to sleep with a 21 year old if she's down. It's also weird him saying he wants love. It's unlikely he's going to find a life partner at 40 with a 21 year old.
I don't blame him for wanting to sleep with a 21 year old either. It's the pursuing the young girls that's creepy. I've been with guys half my age, but I didn't pursue them. I would feel super creepy if I did. I always check ages here before I really flirt with someone.
Actually she pursued me. I was just looking for a workout partner and ran into her. LoL0 -
I don't blame him for wanting to sleep with a 21 year old either. It's the pursuing the young girls that's creepy. I've been with guys half my age, but I didn't pursue them. I would feel super creepy if I did. I always check ages here before I really flirt with someone.
I agree. To a certain degree age is just a number... If you happen to meet someone and connect w/ them, and they just happen to be 20ys older/younger than you, fair play. To each their own.
But to state your age preference range is 20 yrs younger...kinda creepy2 -
I don't blame him for wanting to sleep with a 21 year old either. It's the pursuing the young girls that's creepy. I've been with guys half my age, but I didn't pursue them. I would feel super creepy if I did. I always check ages here before I really flirt with someone.
I agree. To a certain degree age is just a number... If you happen to meet someone and connect w/ them, and they just happen to be 20ys older/younger than you, fair play. To each their own.
But to state your age preference range is 20 yrs younger...kinda creepy
So is it weird if a woman prefers to date someone taller or if someone prefers to date someone interracially? Or only their own race? Or only their own gender? If two people are of legal age why does it matter? My last gf was 24 and I was 39 when we dated... And we were crazy mad in love. But I broke it off because her parents thought it was weird and to big a gap and gave her grief beyond belief. But if I had been black and they gave her the same grief they would have been racist . See my point?0 -
BeardedCowboyWarriorTx wrote: »She's 21. You're 40. Have fun with her if she's down for it but if you're looking for more, good luck with that one. Just be prepared to lose your work out partner when things go south. Also, honestly, it's really creepy that you're 40 and going after chicks that young. JMHO.
Women around my age usually are boring. Me and my kiddos spend almost every night and weekend either volunteering, or having fun. That's to much for women around my age that I've met. Besides, I want more kiddos one day. Most women around 40 are done having babies.
Huh, who knew I was boring just because I'm 47.
LOL maybe your a lot of fun! But all the women I meet around my age are not. Seriously whats wrong with wanting to NOT be home all the time.0 -
At your age & with children in tow, I wouldn't be; seeking and/or accepting anyone, under 30; as anything except a coworker! To me it's even creepy that your exercise partner's under 30, it seems that you've even chosen this as a potential dating situation; whether you made the 1st move beyond that or not!2
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BeardedCowboyWarriorTx wrote: »So is it weird if a woman prefers to date someone taller or if someone prefers to date someone interracially? Or only their own race? Or only their own gender? If two people are of legal age why does it matter? My last gf was 24 and I was 39 when we dated... And we were crazy mad in love. But I broke it off because her parents thought it was weird and to big a gap and gave her grief beyond belief. But if I had been black and they gave her the same grief they would have been racist . See my point?
I get you...consenting adults can do as they please. If two people are attracted to each other, or if they get some other mutual benefit out of the arrangement, then go for it!
But socially and historically there's weird things that come up with gender and age that make it not the same
Of course young girls are appealing...their bodies are likely tighter and firmer, they're more submissive, often more financially dependent (which can make a man feel powerful). But I find something manly and sexy (and un-"compensating for something") about a man who pursues his intellectual/developmental equal.
But that's just my opinion. And you know what they say about opinions being like a##holes and all that...
You do you, OP2 -
She wants a fwb, but you like steady and falling in love. Those are two different things. If you're OK with this chick meeting your kids but not staying in your lives, then sure go for it.1
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BeardedCowboyWarriorTx wrote: »I don't blame him for wanting to sleep with a 21 year old either. It's the pursuing the young girls that's creepy. I've been with guys half my age, but I didn't pursue them. I would feel super creepy if I did. I always check ages here before I really flirt with someone.
I agree. To a certain degree age is just a number... If you happen to meet someone and connect w/ them, and they just happen to be 20ys older/younger than you, fair play. To each their own.
But to state your age preference range is 20 yrs younger...kinda creepy
So is it weird if a woman prefers to date someone taller or if someone prefers to date someone interracially? Or only their own race? Or only their own gender? If two people are of legal age why does it matter? My last gf was 24 and I was 39 when we dated... And we were crazy mad in love. But I broke it off because her parents thought it was weird and to big a gap and gave her grief beyond belief. But if I had been black and they gave her the same grief they would have been racist . See my point?
As being the significantly older of even 2 adults, you should be so much more mature than a 21 year old to; not've enough in common with each other to even seek someone that young! That's why, it's so grotesque!2 -
BeardedCowboyWarriorTx wrote: »So is it weird if a woman prefers to date someone taller or if someone prefers to date someone interracially? Or only their own race? Or only their own gender? If two people are of legal age why does it matter? My last gf was 24 and I was 39 when we dated... And we were crazy mad in love. But I broke it off because her parents thought it was weird and to big a gap and gave her grief beyond belief. But if I had been black and they gave her the same grief they would have been racist . See my point?
I get you...consenting adults can do as they please. If two people are attracted to each other, or if they get some other mutual benefit out of the arrangement, then go for it!
But socially and historically there's weird things that come up with gender and age that make it not the same
Of course young girls are appealing...their bodies are likely tighter and firmer, they're more submissive, often more financially dependent (which can make a man feel powerful). But I find something manly and sexy (and un-"compensating for something") about a man who pursues his intellectual/developmental equal.
But that's just my opinion. And you know what they say about opinions being like a##holes and all that...
You do you, OP
I get your point and appreciate that. And its not like I am not attracted to women my age. Or even havent dated women my age. Its just literally they are boring. Maybe I just haven't found the one who matches my get up and go. I don't know. But I really doubt Id meet any 40 year olds who wanted to have more kids.0 -
DeficitDuchess wrote: »At your age & with children in tow, I wouldn't be; seeking and/or accepting anyone, under 30; as anything except a coworker! To me it's even creepy that your exercise partner's under 30, it seems that you've even chosen this as a potential dating situation; whether you made the 1st move beyond that or not!
High fives! Nailed it!
^5 & thank you!1
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