I guess this is my low

I'm sorry that happened to you. People can be such *kitten*.

Make small changes. If you order a large meal, make it a medium or a small. If you have seconds, stop or halve your seconds for now. Move to no seconds later. Make the portions you eat smaller; maybe start with 3/4 less, than move down to 1/2 less. And if you snack often or mindlessly, try changing that. Figure out why you eat the way you do. Learn what you like to eat versus what you're eating just because it's there. Take a look at the caloric content of food so you're aware of what you're eating.

I used to snack mindlessly a lot. Just cutting that down has changed my caloric intake. Same with having smaller portion sizes.

I'm sorry you had to experience that, people are such little *kitten* sometimes... I agree with everyone who posted here, use MFP, it works. Put in your data, your goals, and it'll spit out a number you stick to. Just remember to be honest with yourself, the program works if you listen to it! Good luck :-)

I've had similar things said about me on multiple occasions, one time it was a couple months after having my first child. And to be honest, I forgot about those comments until I read your post, but it definitely hurt at the time.

If people are able to put you down in that manner; to criticize you about how they perceive that you look, it proves nothing negative about you and everything negative about them. Feel bad for them, because they have to live with themselves and must be truly unhappy to take the energy to pick others apart.

Now, if you want to be your best self - healthy and happy, do that for you. I am sure you are a beautiful person and have the self determination to make this positive change to be healthy!

So, rock it out girl - you got this!

On a positive note, youre not like those *kitten*. You can do this, all you have to do is start ❤

Wth? Your husband caught these people making fun of you, and he didn't call them out on their behavior? And what was the point of him telling you? I would find that very hurtful if it were me.

You have 4 daughters. I would suggest finding a good therapist to figure out why you don't love yourself and why you don't feel like you are a good person. Self loathing is terrible for you and your family. You CAN do this. You CAN change. You just need to feel that you are worth it. Good luck!

sonia_mt wrote: »

I'm up to 5 daughters now! I'm totally proud of my ladies, we have one hell of a year. It's been hard on all of us, I think getting some outside help would be beneficial, it's also a hard step to take...

Oh my!! I grew up with a family of brothers, but no sisters. That must keep you busy!!

And that's something to keep in mind. FIVE girls!! That's a lot going on. But you also need time for you. And it sounds like you need to "find" you again. That first step is hard, but you're here talking about it, so maybe that's your first step. Now, go take another and see if you can get some help to start working through the things you have going on. Then take another. And another. And before you know it, you're on your way to "you" again. You got this.

How devastating... No one deserves to go through that. You've taken a good first step, reaching out here for help. I hope you're able to reach your goals with the support you deserve, good luck on your journey!

One thing to keep in mind: the closer your weight-loss eating is to the way you'll be eating when you reach your goal, the likelier you are to keep going and keep the weight off.

Personally, I'm trying to develop my own healthier relationship with eating. I'm not perfect, but I'm trying to be 'real'. So, it's stuff like recognizing that I'm an introvert who isn't usually good at making small talk at parties and tends to gravitate to the food. And when I'm at a birthday party, yes I want cake and I will not be happy no matter how many pieces of canteloupe or celery sticks I pile on my plate. So, it's learning to realize that the cake isn't inherently 'bad'. What's problematic is having the cake, having seconds, and then going for the ice cream, the chips, the jelly beans, etc—partly because I'm already feeling guilty about the cake when I 'promised' myself I was going to stick to the melon and veggies. What works? Fitting a piece of cake into my daily calories, logging it, and moving on. It's like giving myself permission to have the indulgence, seeing it in the tracker and realizing that it wasn't a 'cheat', but a choice 1) eliminates the guilt and negative self-talk (There you go, off the rails again. Blew the diet. May as well just live it up now cuz today is shot.) 2) Makes it that much easier to stop at the cake. 3) I've found that even if I end up eating a bit more than I thought I would, it's way less than I would have in the past.

There are no foods that are inherently 'good' or 'bad'. Well, okay, I still haven't found a way to love brussels sprouts, but I'm working on it! Unless you are planning to NEVER eat [insert name of food here] again as long as you live, eliminating it entirely may be counterproductive in the long run. Because if what's gong through your head is "once the weight comes off, I'm going to have that pie; I'm going to have a double-scoop sundae..." that's going to make this feel like a temporary punishment, not a lifestyle change. Find out the calories of the foods you love and figure out how to fit them into your weight-loss plan*. I know there are people on MFP who set aside 1-200 calories a day for treats. Or eat a hundred or so calories below goal 6 days a week and then use those 'banked' calories for a weekly indulgence. And it works.

You can do this.




*Note: Most people do have a few foods that are hard to moderate. You might want to refrain from having them temporarily or not keeping them in the house, except for what you can consume at one sitting. Jellybeans are one of mine. If I want to indulge, I buy a small packet; I don't get a large bag.