Runners - have you ever?

jakicooke
jakicooke Posts: 149 Member
edited November 16 in Fitness and Exercise
had abuse shouted at you whilst out on a run?
I am trying to get back to doing a lunchtime run when at work and run with a colleague. today we have just got back from our 3.5 mile run which i was feeling really good about when nearly back at the office a "male" shouted through a flat window "run you fat *kitten* run you f**king fat *kitten*". i have never had abuse shouted at me ever. I have words of encouragement when people have passed me but never something like this.

How do others deal with this? Im feeling really quite upset now - yes i was running (or attempting to) and yes Im fat but Im really not a *kitten*!!!

seriously why would someone ever feel that they could shout such things?
«13

Replies

  • StealthHealth
    StealthHealth Posts: 2,417 Member
    Some people a complete wankers.

    Oh and by the way - Looking at your profile pic, you're not fat.
  • jjpptt2
    jjpptt2 Posts: 5,650 Member
    Some people are just *kitten*. It's unfortunate, but it's the truth.
  • janejellyroll
    janejellyroll Posts: 25,763 Member
    I'm really sorry that happened to you today.

    Yes, it's happened to me before, several times. It can sting or it can even be scary. I try my best to remind myself that it's about them, not about me.
  • StealthHealth
    StealthHealth Posts: 2,417 Member
    Came back to add - Yep. I got some abuse occasionally, but it was very rare. I think women probably get more than men.

    There really is not much you can do about it other than shake it off - it's their crappy behaviour and nothing to do with you personally . If you weren't running past at the time they would be shouting at some other "outlier" - older, different skin colour, looks prudish, looks slutty, looks stupid, in a wheelchair, walking slowly, walking fast, pushing a pram, carrying a heavy load, anything really.
  • Sara1791
    Sara1791 Posts: 760 Member
    edited March 2017
    I'm so sorry that happened to you. I run in quiet rural areas because I'm afraid of stuff like that. When I lived in the city and in the 'burbs, I only tried running outside a few times and it was very uncomfortable. I sincerely hope you'll be stronger than I am.

    eta: In case you think there was any validity to that *kitten*'s comments, let me counter with the truth: you aren't fat.
  • janejellyroll
    janejellyroll Posts: 25,763 Member
    Came back to add - Yep. I got some abuse occasionally, but it was very rare. I think women probably get more than men.

    There really is not much you can do about it other than shake it off - it's their crappy behaviour and nothing to do with you personally . If you weren't running past at the time they would be shouting at some other "outlier" - older, different skin colour, looks prudish, looks slutty, looks stupid, in a wheelchair, walking slowly, walking fast, pushing a pram, carrying a heavy load, anything really.

    I don't think it has much to do with someone's actual weight -- I've had weight-related insults shouted at me at 140 pounds, at 120 pounds, at 115 pounds.

    Not to say that overweight people don't get targeted verbal abuse in public -- they do. But getting weight-related insults doesn't mean that someone is necessarily overweight -- nasty people know that it can hurt women to hear stuff like that, so sometimes they'll say it to anyone.
  • StealthHealth
    StealthHealth Posts: 2,417 Member
    ^^Agree completely. Was what I was unsuccessfully trying to say.

  • GottaBurnEmAll
    GottaBurnEmAll Posts: 7,722 Member
    I am so sorry that happened to you. Some people are just awful.

    I live and run in a rather sedate neighborhood. The only time anyone has ever said anything to me was when I was out playing Pokemon Go. Some teens teased me about being a bit old for it.
  • rosej31
    rosej31 Posts: 189 Member
    Don't pay the person any attention, pray for that person...Most of the time people say things just to get attention.

    In your profile you do not look fat not at all.
  • z4oslo
    z4oslo Posts: 229 Member
    jakicooke wrote: »
    Im feeling really quite upset now

    Please dont allow that drama queen to ruin your day. Shake it off, right now.


  • jakicooke
    jakicooke Posts: 149 Member
    thanks everyone for the support - it seems ive been fortunate to have not come across this before.

    i am fat - my profile pic is 18 months old when i was at my best for a long time - ive put weight on and back at it again hence trying to get in a run most lunchtimes at work. im trying!!!!

    do you just ignore the comments? i didnt give any reaction back as a) i was far too shocked and b) i was actually a little scared by it
  • janejellyroll
    janejellyroll Posts: 25,763 Member
    jakicooke wrote: »
    thanks everyone for the support - it seems ive been fortunate to have not come across this before.

    i am fat - my profile pic is 18 months old when i was at my best for a long time - ive put weight on and back at it again hence trying to get in a run most lunchtimes at work. im trying!!!!

    do you just ignore the comments? i didnt give any reaction back as a) i was far too shocked and b) i was actually a little scared by it

    Ignore it. They want a reaction, don't give it to them. And you can't be sure that saying something won't escalate the situation.
  • dpwellman
    dpwellman Posts: 3,271 Member
    Many times. Twice yesterday, in fact. Sunday, I was even followed for a short distance. Enough of that, though. Not going to keep me from running.
  • mayafit405
    mayafit405 Posts: 61 Member
    jakicooke wrote: »
    had abuse shouted at you whilst out on a run?
    I am trying to get back to doing a lunchtime run when at work and run with a colleague. today we have just got back from our 3.5 mile run which i was feeling really good about when nearly back at the office a "male" shouted through a flat window "run you fat *kitten* run you f**king fat *kitten*". i have never had abuse shouted at me ever. I have words of encouragement when people have passed me but never something like this.

    How do others deal with this? Im feeling really quite upset now - yes i was running (or attempting to) and yes Im fat but Im really not a *kitten*!!!

    seriously why would someone ever feel that they could shout such things?

    What an idiot ! Im so sorry this happened you :( I think the best thing to do is ignore people like this. IMO , they're just trying to put the negativity they're feeling on you. I've had rocks thrown at me and been shot at with bebe gun. :| The only thing I could do was just not run in those areas anymore . My advice: Stay aware of your surroundings , don't engage idiots that drive by in cars and shout insults and keep up the excellent work you're doing <3

    Best wishes
  • dawson002
    dawson002 Posts: 170 Member
    unfortunately there are major idiots in this world.

    try not to let these idiots get to you and maybe next time, stick a finger or 2 up at them
  • Sara1791
    Sara1791 Posts: 760 Member
    Verbal harassment I usually ignored. Occasionally told them to go do something gross with their mother. Because I feel like a sucker when I let people make me a victim. I'm not advocating that, because it could escalate into a dangerous situation if you taunt the the animals.

    If you feel physically threatened, it's a different situation. When I cycled, I carried little metal nuts and a big U-lock and I wielded them against aggressive taxis and physically intimidating people. I considered it self-defense.
  • BrunetteRunner87
    BrunetteRunner87 Posts: 591 Member
    I've been running for years and people have yelled at me a handful of times. It's been sexual in nature but I also experienced someone yell "you suck!" I don't suck so I don't know why someone would say that lol. People can be mean but unless it's someone who signs my paychecks or my significant other saying something they're just words that shouldn't be given any thought.
  • T1DCarnivoreRunner
    T1DCarnivoreRunner Posts: 11,502 Member
    That guy probably has problems of his own and is just trying to deflect.
  • lporter229
    lporter229 Posts: 4,907 Member
    Please don't let that bother you or stop you from running. It happens all of the time. People that do this are usually trying to make you feel bad about yourself because they can't feel good about themselves. Good for you for getting out there and doing something to feel good about yourself. In the end, that's all that matters!
  • Sabine_Stroehm
    Sabine_Stroehm Posts: 19,263 Member
    Only once. I had been running, safely, in DC for years, but on a trip to suburban Boston some young "men" went by in a truck, yelled something sexual and obscene at me and threw an open beer at me.
  • ritzvin
    ritzvin Posts: 2,860 Member
    Cycling- we'll sometimes get stuff like that (rural redneck areas). Running (city)- usually encouragement/thumbs-up and catcalls.
  • wellthenwhat
    wellthenwhat Posts: 526 Member
    I'll be honest, my first reaction would have been a middle finger. Probably not a good idea for multiple reasons, lol. I have never been harassed, but I have had people run me off the road. Once I was biking, heard a horn, got off the road, and a pickup sped by in my lane. He would have hit me if I hadn't moved. And he had plenty of room to move. I on the otherhand, went into a steep ditch filled with thistles. Oh well, said a few choice words, got back on the road, and continued.
  • H_Ock12
    H_Ock12 Posts: 1,152 Member
    Unless someone tries to grab me (it's only happened twice, years ago), I just laugh it off. If I think of something creative quick enough, I'll yell back at them...if not, they may get blessed with a curse word or I may just ignore them.
  • BruinsGal_91
    BruinsGal_91 Posts: 1,400 Member
    Only once. I had been running, safely, in DC for years, but on a trip to suburban Boston some young "men" went by in a truck, yelled something sexual and obscene at me and threw an open beer at me.

    Hah, and I was just about to post that although I got yelled at plenty of times when I was living in the UK, since moving to the burbs of Boston, I've never been yelled at at all. Hope the beer can didn't hit you.

    OP, it sucks I know, but please try and brush it off, and don't let that idiot stop you from running.
  • peleroja
    peleroja Posts: 3,979 Member
    I live and run in a city and I pass lots of traffic/pedestrians, so I get this kind of thing a lot. It's like 20% jeering and 80% gross sex stuff and I'm pretty immune to it now.

    A drunk guy did try to chase me once while he yelled about my body last summer at 5AM, but he was stumbling-drunk, I was on a fairly busy artery road, and I was only a couple kms in, so it didn't seem especially threatening as I could easily outrun him.

    I dunno, I feel safer running with people yelling at me from their cars on well-trafficked streets than I do in empty parks or trails, since it feels much more likely that I would have a physical altercation with someone if there aren't lots of other people around (whereas running down an active street, yelling is about as bad as it's going to get since there would be so many witnesses were something to happen), so I just deal with it and know that it has nothing to do with me really, as people who do this don't really discriminate as to whom they're yelling.
  • The_Enginerd
    The_Enginerd Posts: 3,982 Member
    edited March 2017
    I've had a few dumb comments thrown my way like "Run Faster" or "Run Forest Run" while running in an urban environment. In the VERY rural midwest where I was running during a family vacation, I had someone honk at me while his friend stuck his junk out the window of his truck at me... actually felt sorry for the guy. Clearly he's repressed and he doesn't have much to work with.

  • oocdc2
    oocdc2 Posts: 1,361 Member
    Not yet, but unfortunately it's probably a question of "when" than "if."

    *Kitten* 'em--I'd like to see them come out here and run even one mile...
This discussion has been closed.