Willpower and Determination
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I identify as a healthy person, and so because of that I do the things that healthy people do. I tell myself that I am the kind of person who works out and eats clean, and so I do.0
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Rebecca0224 wrote: »endlessfall16 wrote: »endlessfall16 wrote: »Landoficeandsnow wrote: »"Nothing tastes as good as fit feels".
Actually, there are plenty of things that tastes as good, if not better, than fit feels. I hate this quote and all derivations of it.
All I've got is that I take a break every 3-4 months and eat like I used to.
In the context of curing disordered eating it's a great quote.
I hate the contradiction of struggling to lose wt and promoting eating (that induces excessive) at the same time. That's disordered thinking, too.
Okay, I must be inferring the meaning differently than you. To me, "nothing tastes as good as thin/skinny/fit feels" means "if you want to be thin/skinny/fit, don't eat". That certainly doesn't "cure" disordered eating in my book.
How do you interpret the meaning of the saying? How does it "cure" disordered eating?
Yes, we have very different interpretations.
To me It's very extreme and illogical to advocate "don't eat". Not eating is not possible for any moving living thing. Don't know why you take it that far.
Besides, it's the word "taste" which is a state of mind. I take it to mean being fit should come as a higher priority. If this priority always comes first as a rule, you can't have the excessive/overweight overeating. No?
Nothing taste as good as skinny/thin/fit feels is a mantra in the eating disorder community to discourage people from eating.
You don't need to tell me. It's zyxst that you need to explain it to. LOL.
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Jayfeather15 wrote: »Does anyone have any tips on staying focused and not losing the will to diet? Does keeping a picture of a toned hot body help?
I don't lose the will to eat at a deficit because I don't deny myself what I want to eat. I eat cookies, and pasta, and etc. etc. but in smaller portions that fit into my calories. I track my food (no matter how bad) so when I see red for my calorie #'s, I know I'm not focused on weight loss. It helps me make conscious choices.4 -
kenyonhaff wrote: »I certainly don't surround myself with pictures of "hot toned bodies" because those are MODELS... typically those that got gifted with a certain selection of genetic makeup, often undergone surgery, and the pictures are often Photoshopped somehow, and in the end...that simply won't be *my* body. I likely will not ever look like those people and many if not all are not realistic. I don't like going for unrealistic comparisons. It feels really bad.
I agree, and you reminded me of a fitness site that had a Q&A section, where multiple women had written in requesting advice for "getting a body like [name of this or that model]". If you really want to look like a particular model you'd be better off working on a mind-transference ray than getting fit, lol.
About willpower, it is a useful thing to have but if you don't have it, it doesn't really help having people tell you to "have willpower." Because you don't have it and you can't just go to The Willpower Store and buy a package of Premium Willpower.
Let me describe what it was like for me when I first started trying to lose weight: If I bought a bag of candy, my id would constantly be whispering, "Have another candy." Constantly, every minute. Imagine that all day, all evening, every waking moment. It wasn't a matter of being hungry--a lot of obesity problems aren't, right? I could have filled up completely on protein or anything else and that little voice would still be whispering "Eaaat the caaaandy."
This was a stressful scenario because I had to make the right decision (don't overeat on candy) not once, but a thousand times a night--because the candy would be in the back of my mind aaaall the time as long as it was in the house. So even if I said "No, I'm not having that candy" time after time, it only took ONE bad decision to "break." Which was demoralizing and reinforced the notion that "I can't do this."
So yeah, willpower is important but if someone is having struggles similar to mine then it's totally fine to start small. Like your first act of willpower can be avoiding the candy aisle. Second act of willpower can be walking down it without buying anything. (I had so many personal battles where I'd put a candy bar in the cart, then put it back, then put it in the cart again, then put it back again, lol!)
We see lots of posts by people who "eat chocolate every day", and good for them, but there's no reason for someone to set themself up for failure if they aren't there yet. No one would try to go from "completely sedentary" to "running a marathon" in one day, they'd train and gradually work up their endurance. It's okay to gradually build up your willpower too. (I did eventually reach the point where I can have a house full of candy and pace myself. But it took a lot of time, lol.)1 -
BlueSkyShoal wrote: »No one would try to go from "completely sedentary" to "running a marathon" in one day, they'd train and gradually work up their endurance. It's okay to gradually build up your willpower too. (I did eventually reach the point where I can have a house full of candy and pace myself. But it took a lot of time, lol.)
Haha re: "willpower store". Good point. Esp the part above resonated for me. Lots written about willpower functioning like a muscle-- can be strengthened by progressive challenge and also overused to point of failure. I Wish I could have radically reframed my attitude towards eating in a snap, but all my progress has been over long periods of time, too. It really does get easier if you stick with it, OP.
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Rebecca0224 wrote: »
Actually, there are plenty of things that
Nothing taste as good as skinny/thin/fit feels is a mantra in the eating disorder community to discourage people from eating.
^This is true regardless of personal interpretation. It is shorthand for "don't eat" and has been widely co-opted by ED and ANA groups.2 -
I try very hard not to compare myself to others either positively or negatively. Doing that is a sure fire way to put me in an awful frame of mind.
My motivation is wear cute clothes well. It's 100% a vanity thing for me, not that I'm not cute now-- I'd just like more options.
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no one can really tell you. it's really up to you, and your mindset0
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For me, it helped to re-frame the process so that it required a minimum of willpower, discipline or motivation. Those are not my strong suits.
Some alternatives? Experimentation and thought are good supporting players. So is fun.
When I first started losing, I felt hungry, and could see that I wasn't getting ideal nutrition by eating exactly as I had, but with lower portions - even though my fat-Ann way of eating was mostly healthy foods.
By experimenting with what I ate, and when, I was able to find strategies that left me feeling pretty satiated most of the time, usually only feeling hungry when I was getting close to a meal time.
Satiation is different for everyone. Your big variables are what you eat, and when. "What" could mean, within a healthy range of each, getting relatively more protein, or fats, or high-volume/low-cal veggies. "When" is about all those choices like big breakfast or no breakfast, 1/2/3/5/6 meals or snacks, whether to save some calories for evening snacking, which meals are bigger (or maybe they're all the same), etc. Some people like to eat lighter on weekdays, and at maintenance calories on the weekend (often for social reasons) So, you can try some experiments to see what works best for you.
Your MFP food diary can be a help in this. If you have a particularly "crave-y" day, review your diary and see whether you can tell why. Sometimes it's about eating (perhaps even the previous day's eating!). But you can also think about other factors that could have an influence: Exercise, stress, boredom, triggers for habit-based snacking, poor vs. good sleep, etc.
Using my diary thoughtfully really helped me gradually improve my nutrition and satiation, so that the weight loss part became easier, and required less tooth-gritting discipline.
If you find that non-food factors are influencing hunger or cravings, you can also work on strategies to improve those, like picking up a hobby (ones that require clean hands are particularly good
), or substituting a more productive habit for an unhelpful one.
On the activity front, the alternative to discipline is definitely "fun". Keep an open mind, and try some varied activities until you find one you enjoy enough that you want to do it. That's where the magic is.
I'd suggest sampling some things, asking yourself to stick with each long enough to get past the awkward newbie phase where the activity seems clumsy and impossible (that part's never fun). But things that are harder to learn at first can be the most satisfying in the long run, because they stay interesting.
Maybe try some group classes, or check out different videos on YouTube. Think creatively: Try dance, table tennis, cycling, rock-climbing, walking, weight training, martial arts, swimming, kayaking or any other thing you've found fun in the past or that has always intrigued you. Even sampling things is fun, and a way to meet some more-active people you can do things with and have active social time.
Good luck!4 -
For me, it helped to re-frame the process so that it required a minimum of willpower, discipline or motivation. Those are not my strong suits.
Some alternatives? Experimentation and thought are good supporting players. So is fun.
When I first started losing, I felt hungry, and could see that I wasn't getting ideal nutrition by eating exactly as I had, but with lower portions - even though my fat-Ann way of eating was mostly healthy foods.
By experimenting with what I ate, and when, I was able to find strategies that left me feeling pretty satiated most of the time, usually only feeling hungry when I was getting close to a meal time.
Just curious, do you select what you eat for satiety for all the meals (every time you eat)? Or only for some of the meals?
I imagine having that filter on all the time is going to affect one's decision to go out and eat with friends, etc. You would always have to judge which is mentally straining to me.
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Find a way of eating and a level of activity that keeps you at the correct calorie level without needing willpower. It can take some trial and error, but once you find it, you're golden.
This. But not just for the caloric burn (but that is nice, too!). For me, rock climbing helps me keep my willpower up regarding food choices because the more fit I am, the easier/more fun it is!
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EbonyDahlia wrote: ». Work on thinking "I'm going to do X" and then doing it.
If this is not willpower, then what is it. It is the will and determination to do x. Willpower is not just related to not doing something but also to actually getting something done. Its the same as calories in calories out. there are many ways to describe it, but in the end it is the same thing. If you want to lose weight, and you stick to it without going back to old habits, then that is willpower.
doesnt matter what systems / diets / fad crazes / blah blah you want to do , you still need the will to stick with it long term. if you fall off, you need the will to get back on.
it is ALL about will power, regardless of what name you want to give it.1 -
EbonyDahlia wrote: ». Work on thinking "I'm going to do X" and then doing it.
If this is not willpower, then what is it. It is the will and determination to do x. Willpower is not just related to not doing something but also to actually getting something done. Its the same as calories in calories out. there are many ways to describe it, but in the end it is the same thing. If you want to lose weight, and you stick to it without going back to old habits, then that is willpower.
doesnt matter what systems / diets / fad crazes / blah blah you want to do , you still need the will to stick with it long term. if you fall off, you need the will to get back on.
it is ALL about will power, regardless of what name you want to give it.
Dude, it doesn't have to be willpower all the time. It can be change in mindset, revelation, exposure to new experience.
For example, go through an open heart surgery and you will never look at bacon the same ... It takes no effort to avoid bacon.
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I don't think willpower is the key to success. I think a plan is.
Read Hadfield's book,
http://penguinrandomhouse.ca/books/223528/astronauts-guide-life-earth#9780345812728
And Duhigg's book on habits.
https://g.co/kgs/DB0rBs
Willpower will get you past the cookie aisle and the treats display at checkout. It will help you walk past the treat bowl at work the first two passes but not the third. Willpower is depleted by over-use and by the stresses of the day.
Weight loss takes longer than a single pass of the cookie aisle. That's why you need a plan. Figure out what you need to change one habit at a time and build new habits.
Plans are for the long haul. Welcome to the long haul club.4 -
I don't know what you mean but I usually try to consider my options before I eat. I have to make a conscious decision to eat something healthy. If we eat out I try to pick something healthy but good. It's even easier if it's a buffet because of salad bars.endlessfall16 wrote: »For me, it helped to re-frame the process so that it required a minimum of willpower, discipline or motivation. Those are not my strong suits.
Some alternatives? Experimentation and thought are good supporting players. So is fun.
When I first started losing, I felt hungry, and could see that I wasn't getting ideal nutrition by eating exactly as I had, but with lower portions - even though my fat-Ann way of eating was mostly healthy foods.
By experimenting with what I ate, and when, I was able to find strategies that left me feeling pretty satiated most of the time, usually only feeling hungry when I was getting close to a meal time.
Just curious, do you select what you eat for satiety for all the meals (every time you eat)? Or only for some of the meals?
I imagine having that filter on all the time is going to affect one's decision to go out and eat with friends, etc. You would always have to judge which is mentally straining to me.
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endlessfall16 wrote: »For me, it helped to re-frame the process so that it required a minimum of willpower, discipline or motivation. Those are not my strong suits.
Some alternatives? Experimentation and thought are good supporting players. So is fun.
When I first started losing, I felt hungry, and could see that I wasn't getting ideal nutrition by eating exactly as I had, but with lower portions - even though my fat-Ann way of eating was mostly healthy foods.
By experimenting with what I ate, and when, I was able to find strategies that left me feeling pretty satiated most of the time, usually only feeling hungry when I was getting close to a meal time.
Just curious, do you select what you eat for satiety for all the meals (every time you eat)? Or only for some of the meals?
I imagine having that filter on all the time is going to affect one's decision to go out and eat with friends, etc. You would always have to judge which is mentally straining to me.
I'm not sure I even understand that "every meal" question: It doesn't really compute, for me. For me, satiation in general helps me stay the course. It seems to apply more to an overall day. I consider it, and try to achieve it as much as feasible, through the day. It really isn't (exactly) a meal at a time thing. (I do occasionally eat a protein-rich snack to stay on track - I keep dry-roasted soybeans in my car for exactly this reason.) Hydration also figures in.
I go out to eat with friends, I drink alcohol (which is not at all satiating, but can be enjoyable), etc. For me, the social dimension has to work, too, absolutely: I'm not one of those people who wants to avoid eating out, or not go to friends' houses because I can't weigh food, or that kind of thing. My life has to work as a life, not just a way of eating!
There's no way to put willpower or determination 100% out of the picture: There are lots of ways to make sure it's not your only strategy. I, personally, can't just gut it out on "willpower". It isn't realistic for me. Others' mileage may vary.
The really important message, IMO: Experiment to find out what works for you. Also, I think the overall perspective of using diary review as a tool, and trying to stay satiated most of the time, is useful.
I'm not talking through my hat, here, either: I lost 1/3 of my bodyweight, am at a BMI around 21, have good muscle/strength and am very active for my "advanced" age (LOL) which is 61, and am into my second year of weight maintenance.5 -
endlessfall16 wrote: »For me, it helped to re-frame the process so that it required a minimum of willpower, discipline or motivation. Those are not my strong suits.
Some alternatives? Experimentation and thought are good supporting players. So is fun.
When I first started losing, I felt hungry, and could see that I wasn't getting ideal nutrition by eating exactly as I had, but with lower portions - even though my fat-Ann way of eating was mostly healthy foods.
By experimenting with what I ate, and when, I was able to find strategies that left me feeling pretty satiated most of the time, usually only feeling hungry when I was getting close to a meal time.
Just curious, do you select what you eat for satiety for all the meals (every time you eat)? Or only for some of the meals?
I imagine having that filter on all the time is going to affect one's decision to go out and eat with friends, etc. You would always have to judge which is mentally straining to me.
One other thing I want to add: I personally don't think of satiety as a dietary "god above all gods". For me - as I mentioned previously, my life has to work as a life, including the social and celebratory components, 'cos fun. Beyond that, my eating has to balance satiety, tastiness, and nutrition.
It's possible - for me, at least - to find ways to eat that hit all 3 of those goals the overwhelming majority of the time. I haven't found it necessary to sacrifice tastiness to achieve satiety: Life is too short to eat foods I don't enjoy. I haven't found it necessary to sacrifice nutrition, either. And this can be accomplished within my calorie goal.
It's not that every food or every meal has to be "perfect" in some way. It's our overall way of eating that matters, and how that shapes up not just a food at a time, a meal at a time, a day at a time, but across some reasonable span of time. Willpower or determination has to play a bigger role, IMO, if one is outside that balance . . . and I'm not good at willpower or determination, especially not if it has to be all the *baby-feline* time.2 -
For me its looking at all the overweight and obese people everywhere and thinking: I never want to be so out of shape!0
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Rebecca0224 wrote: »endlessfall16 wrote: »endlessfall16 wrote: »Landoficeandsnow wrote: »"Nothing tastes as good as fit feels".
Actually, there are plenty of things that tastes as good, if not better, than fit feels. I hate this quote and all derivations of it.
All I've got is that I take a break every 3-4 months and eat like I used to.
In the context of curing disordered eating it's a great quote.
I hate the contradiction of struggling to lose wt and promoting eating (that induces excessive) at the same time. That's disordered thinking, too.
Okay, I must be inferring the meaning differently than you. To me, "nothing tastes as good as thin/skinny/fit feels" means "if you want to be thin/skinny/fit, don't eat". That certainly doesn't "cure" disordered eating in my book.
How do you interpret the meaning of the saying? How does it "cure" disordered eating?
Yes, we have very different interpretations.
To me It's very extreme and illogical to advocate "don't eat". Not eating is not possible for any moving living thing. Don't know why you take it that far.
Besides, it's the word "taste" which is a state of mind. I take it to mean being fit should come as a higher priority. If this priority always comes first as a rule, you can't have the excessive/overweight overeating. No?
Nothing taste as good as skinny/thin/fit feels is a mantra in the eating disorder community to discourage people from eating.
I went back and read my post and I swear it's in English and that is says a very similar thing - if you want to be thin/skinny/fit, don't eat.
Yes, I know it's an inspo quote for ED community. I'm not the one who thinks it means something completely different and can cure EDs.0
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