Mean Things People Said That Ended Up Motivating You

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Replies

  • viviennereill
    viviennereill Posts: 7 Member
    My mother said I was 'letting myself go' on a visit last summer after I gained an additional 10 lbs in a year to 162 at 5'4. I am not sure if that was my final motivation to lose 28 lbs, but she sure does approve of me now.

    Sorry that happened to you - that's *kitten* that approval is based on your weight.
    However, I'm glad you were able to lose weight, if that's what you wanted :)
  • MsMaeFlowers
    MsMaeFlowers Posts: 261 Member
    I got sick of everyone asking if I was pregnant. The worst was at wedding, during the ceremony, I could hear my husband's mother discussing with someone whether or not I was pregnant or if it was just my dress. I refuse to call that witch by anything other than her name or "my husband's mother".

    Not the reason I started losing weight, but definitely something that stays with me. My final straw was actually the embarrassment of having to have my wedding band cut off my finger.
  • Psychgrrl
    Psychgrrl Posts: 3,177 Member
    mawill08 wrote: »
    mila_lova wrote: »
    Yesterday, I walked by the detention table and a kid yelled at me "She's ugly! She's SO ugly!!!"....I didn't binge that night and I called the dermatologist.

    Also, in November my boyfriend told me the only reason he would break up with me was my 20 lb weight gain.

    You have bigger problems than just weight loss!

    Agreed. Have you thought about talking to him about that? It seems like a really shallow, superficial and judgmental comment. No one who cares about you should say something like that.

    You could lose over 100 pounds really fast and ditch the boy"friend." :wink:
  • lilawolf
    lilawolf Posts: 1,690 Member
    The only mean things about my body that anyone has ever said was when I got fit.

    What got me to change was the voice in my own head. My jeans were getting pretty tight and one morning after a bit of a struggle, I saw two very large women waiting on the elevator to take them up one floor, and clear as a bell the voice said, "in 5-10 years, that will be you if you don't change". I'd been gaining 10lbs/year..Needed the first 20, didn't need the last 30. Took a walk that afternoon, and never looked back.

    My mum told me that my muscles made me "almost ugly". That didn't change my routine or my goals.
  • Ocean_Breezy
    Ocean_Breezy Posts: 55 Member
    Because look at you. You let yourself go. Nobody is going to want you like that. 16 years ago. But, you never forget the words.
  • leanjogreen18
    leanjogreen18 Posts: 2,492 Member
    Because it happened to me, it was funny but I wouldn't think it funny if it happened to someone else but...

    Several years ago I had just started walking and I wear ear buds. When approaching someone I turn down the music to exchange pleasantries. One day while passing a group of teenagers I heard one say "look at that fat *asparagus*" not thinking I could hear them. I turned and said "why do you think I'm out here walking"? I had a smile on my face. Poor kids they actually said "so sorry" they were really embarrassed. I actually took it pretty lighthearted, one because it was true but also because they were apologizing.

    But I can't say anything external helped. I've never been happy being overweight. My self talk was the worst!

    Quoting myself to point out the filter...lol
  • I work in a memory care unit and over the past year I have gained about 80 pounds I am now working on loosing it. I finally decided I was done with my current habits and it was time for a change when two different women with dementia (so of course I took no offense) rubbed my belly and asked how the pregnancy was going..... haha wow eye opener since I'm 21 and have no kids.
  • PeachesNcreamgal
    PeachesNcreamgal Posts: 357 Member
    This happened last year when I was jogging with my head down minding my own business so this *kitten* points at me and tells her boyfriend look an elephant is running(I was 80 kgs then) I made a promise to myself I would run harder and faster. I didn't lose much maybe 3-4 kgs but I like to tell myself I made serious gains!
  • yellingkimber
    yellingkimber Posts: 229 Member
    edited April 2017
    I grew up with my grandparents. My grandpa wasn't really taught how to communicate concern appropriately growing up. The "manly" thing to do is to make snide comments. I remember being 12 and him saying to me "We need a wide load sign for your kitten/asparagus/rear." (5'5, 160 lbs) You get the point. At the time, it hit me really hard because I was horseback riding 6x a week for an hour a day + barn chores and wasn't eating any worse than the rest of my family. He was the one cooking my meals!

    Looking back now, I realize that he was concerned about me gaining weight at an alarming amount (puberty is weird) and didn't know how to vocalize it. When my body caught up to all of the exercise I was doing, I ended up hovering around 100 lbs at 5'5 @ 13 years old. He was the first person to tell me I looked like a walking graveyard, too.

    At Christmas 2016, I came back to visit from college and the first thing he said to me was "Wow, you got fat." It stung until I remembered the stories I just told above. He might not be the most tactful, but he's never lied to me, so that comment was the kick in the pants I needed to take a good honest look in the mirror and make a change. I was the same height and weight that I was when he made the original comment about the wide load sign, which put me at the heaviest I'd ever been.
  • __TMac__
    __TMac__ Posts: 1,669 Member
    For me, the mean comments don't help. They get in my head and interfere. The best I can do is just try to set them aside, and focus on taking care of myself in the same way I'd take care of someone I love. I'm trying to see myself through my husband's eyes. So I eat nutritious food that I like, in appropriate quantities, and try to build active hobbies and habits.

    My narcissistic sister has a way of saying hurtful things that haunt me for years. I'll be seeing her soon, for the first time in a long while, and I'm frankly unnerved by how much I'm worrying about it. I've lost a bit of weight, and she's gained, so I'm sure she'll ramp up the hurtful things to make herself feel better. I have a couple of strategies to try, entirely based on how I'll respond, not on how to prevent her from saying it.
  • zizziesz
    zizziesz Posts: 1 Member
    Last month, I went shopping with a few classmates and one of them caught me looking at cute cropped sweaters that cut off about the mid riff, exposing a good proportion of the belly if worn with low waisted jeans. She gave my body a look and said, "You should probably look at clothes that better suit your build; cropped clothes will just be straight up ugly with your muffin top."

    It was all the more intimidating coming from a gorgeous 5'9 who confidently flaunted her abs whenever possible, that day included.

    This rang in my mind all day until I got home and weighed myself. I had gained precisely 6.3 kgs since starting university 6 months prior, more than a kilo a month. This was mostly down to lack of exercise - adjusting to university had been difficult for me, but that was no excuse. Until the summer before, I had been fairly fit from years and years of playing football, and the "summer body" was something I used to have throughout the year. That wasn't the case anymore - my clothes were tight for me and my flat stomach was replaced by a - she was right - muffin top.

    That definitely motivated me to start running and eating healthy again. Hopefully I'll be somewhat fitter for the summer and maybe stun her at some point in a cropped top that doesn't show fat sticking out everywhere :D
  • amybuitron
    amybuitron Posts: 1 Member
    Nearly 10 yrs ago, but it still bothers me to this day. I was walking through a fair with my husband who is a redhead and we passed a dunking booth with a clown sitting on the seat above the water. He of course was hollering things out at people as they passed to try to get them to come dunk him and he said something to my husband to the effect of mocking his hair. I laughed and the clown said, "I don't know what you're laughing at, you look like you've enjoyed one too many Twinkies!" Everyone around looked at me, and I was mortified. I just wanted to leave and go home and to this day I remind people that I hate Twinkies! It really bothered me, even though my husband tried to remind me that the clown was just trying to make money and would've said anything to get me to pay to try to dunk him-but it still hurt.
  • GemstoneofHeart
    GemstoneofHeart Posts: 865 Member
    I was constantly being asked when the baby was due. I wasn't pregnant.
    I always shrugged it off as people just been rude.
    Then a 5 year old asked...and I knew it was time to make some changes.
  • PsychoticMama
    PsychoticMama Posts: 1 Member
    Working on a girl guide biscuit stall with Miss 6. Spotted a sweet looking elderly lady going passed and did the usual "Good morning, would you like to buy some girl guide biscuits". She came up and said "No - I've never been as big as you and I don't want to get that way"

    I just stood their dumbstruck.
  • honkinballs
    honkinballs Posts: 34 Member
    edited April 2017
    Awful gout attack last summer. Nearly had me lose my job because of the time off I was asking for to deal with the pain. Could hardly move and didn't really eat for about three days straight. Then when I started the healing process I took a long hard look at how I got to that point. That was me at 330 pounds and last Sunday weighing in at 270. Got a ways to go but man, what a wake up call.

    EDIT: Oh crap I forgot the point of my story. My nephew as cute as he is (about 4 now) keeps calling me fat. He's just learning and all but yeah, that was another factor.
  • Therealobi1
    Therealobi1 Posts: 3,262 Member
    Asked if I was pregnant a few times. Also the nurse called me obese. Now whilst it bothered me I didn't spring into action because of that. Being called names doesn't help everyone, in fact it makes some eat more

    I lost weight when I was ready for a group holiday
  • AnvilHead
    AnvilHead Posts: 18,343 Member
    edited April 2017
    I was constantly being asked when the baby was due. I wasn't pregnant.

    I made that mistake once.

    Once.
  • zekni
    zekni Posts: 25 Member
    After my dad died last year I was struggling with everything in life and weight was one of them. I was going out on a date with a very beautiful male friend of mine march 2016.. and he mentioned that if we saw anyone he knew we would have to hide.
    Lost nearly 30lbs since then, with that statement getting me off the couch countless times over the last year. Dont talk to that person anymore, but i do kind of appreciate the backhanded motivation he gave me.
  • JuliahK1987
    JuliahK1987 Posts: 39 Member
    This happened last year when I was jogging with my head down minding my own business so this *asparagus* points at me and tells her boyfriend look an elephant is running(I was 80 kgs then) I made a promise to myself I would run harder and faster. I didn't lose much maybe 3-4 kgs but I like to tell myself I made serious gains!
    Oh wow! I guess my goal is to be "an elephant " since my goal weight is 80kgs which is about 160 lbs. Good for you for not chasing that girl and kicking her behind lol because if it was me, I would!
  • emmacoxy88
    emmacoxy88 Posts: 6 Member
    I will always remember a friend saying "just because she (my friend) is smaller than you doesn't mean your less pretty". It had never even crossed my mind at that point that I was less pretty because I was a little bigger. That one sentence didn't motivate me then but has stuck with me since and motivates me now
  • fkfl81
    fkfl81 Posts: 12 Member
    Several moments stick out in my memory.... and push me each day to keep going.
    My father once told me "your *kitten* is as big as the spread at the Ponderosa Steak house."
    Celebrating Canada Day and wearing shorts with CANADA across the bum, again, my father exclaimed infront of a crowd " WOW I didn't know Canada was THAT big!!!"
    And the most common I hear still, is, "You don't have a big bum, you just have big hips "
  • wellthenwhat
    wellthenwhat Posts: 526 Member
    My one co-worker told others that I was gonna gain weight when I changed to a sedetary job. I am determined to prove her wrong!
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