Breakups

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AnnyisOK
AnnyisOK Posts: 121 Member
in Chit-Chat
I debated with myself on posting this but at the moment I don't know what else to do with myself. How do you deal with a breakup?
It's not my first but prior to this I was single and happy for a very long time, then silly me decided to give relationships another shot and it was going well despite the distance, until one day the person who was a constant in your life is no longer there. I honestly never thought I'd be in this place again so I don't know what to do.
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  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,841 Member
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    If you were happy being single, just go back to that.
  • ShrinkingViolet1982
    ShrinkingViolet1982 Posts: 919 Member
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    If you're absolutely sure it's over, then find reasons you're happy that it is. Inconvenient in distance. You didn't like long phone calls. He took 3 days to text back. Whatever. Though we all look at relationships through rosy glasses, there are always faults - it's easier to get past it if you remember some things that drove you mad, and then be happy single as you were.
  • LiftingRiot
    LiftingRiot Posts: 6,952 Member
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    stay away from alcohol, its a depressant. Work out more. Stay busy at work. Don't give a *kitten* for a good week.
  • Pirate_chick
    Pirate_chick Posts: 1,216 Member
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    Buy yourself something ridiculously expensive that you want, and go back to being happy and single.
  • diezel67
    diezel67 Posts: 97 Member
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    Aw sorry to hear.
  • inertiastrength
    inertiastrength Posts: 2,343 Member
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    Cutaway_Collar wrote: »
    Long distance never works. Try it to engage in social work and help needy children and orphans and you will see a purpose to life and perhaps meet a good boy.

    It works if the end game is one of the people move. My bf and I started off LDR and he has since made the move.

    OP try and distract yourself but the only thing that will really help is time. You need to get used to not having them constantly "there" sucks :/
  • AnnyisOK
    AnnyisOK Posts: 121 Member
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    LiftingRiot wrote: »
    stay away from alcohol, its a depressant. Work out more. Stay busy at work. Don't give a *kitten* for a good week.

    I think that was part of the problem. It was long distance but both of us were also very busy, too, especially with me having just starting a new chapter in my life.
    fascha wrote: »
    It works if the end game is one of the people move. My bf and I started off LDR and he has since made the move.

    OP try and distract yourself but the only thing that will really help is time. You need to get used to not having them constantly "there" sucks :/

    Thank you. I'm trying. It's just day 1, and I know logically I'll be fine, it's not my first breakup, but it just hurts when you really didn't think it would end. Even with the distance we both knew our goal so as much as it sucked not being together it wasn't that much of an issue, but I guess recently he realized how daunting the hurdles are. We're not just long distance, we're living in different countries and a lot of what is keeping us apart is finance. :(
  • Carillon_Campanello
    Carillon_Campanello Posts: 726 Member
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    This thread comes up every so often.

    Build a wall between you and that person. Make no contact.

    Put yourself to work on you. Day and night. Self care.

    Eventually you will pull through. Time varies by every individual. Results not guaranteed.

    Good luck.
  • skinnycow1234567
    skinnycow1234567 Posts: 167 Member
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    Keep your mind occupied... Hit the gym,go out with friends..Sitting home sad is not good. Hope you get over it fast..sorry
  • SomebodyWakeUpHIcks
    SomebodyWakeUpHIcks Posts: 3,836 Member
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    Take a weekend trip to Toronto.
  • kaizaku
    kaizaku Posts: 1,039 Member
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    It will take time. Only time will heal.
  • xsmilexforxmex
    xsmilexforxmex Posts: 1,216 Member
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    I threw myself into fitness with my ex - my free time was spent working out, meal prepping, trail running, and hiking. Running can be cathartic and gives you time to process without sitting in self-pity.
  • AnnyisOK
    AnnyisOK Posts: 121 Member
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    SomebodyWakeUpHIcks wrote: »
    Take a weekend trip to Toronto.
    My ex is Canadian...

    And to the poster who doesn't believe it's a real relationship. That's a lot of assumptions. Lots of couples have to endure distances apart for years, that doesn't make their relationship any less real. He and I did meet in person.
  • IVMay
    IVMay Posts: 442 Member
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    Labrador. Great therapy dogs. I can't stress enough how labradorable they are in terms of turning that frown upside down.
  • dpwellman
    dpwellman Posts: 3,271 Member
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    Breakup? Time. Just time. But be social. And of course resist the urge to try and pick up where left off with someone else. That would end even worse.
  • dpwellman
    dpwellman Posts: 3,271 Member
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    xsmilexforxmex wrote: »
    trail running, and hiking. Running can be cathartic and gives you time to process without sitting in self-pity.
    <3
  • Carillon_Campanello
    Carillon_Campanello Posts: 726 Member
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    IVMay wrote: »
    Labrador. Great therapy dogs. I can't stress enough how labradorable they are in terms of turning that frown upside down.

    And what other breed would tolerate this tomfoolery?

    obrs69dg2652.jpg
  • yusaku02
    yusaku02 Posts: 3,476 Member
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    Carillon_Campanello wrote: »
    IVMay wrote: »
    Labrador. Great therapy dogs. I can't stress enough how labradorable they are in terms of turning that frown upside down.

    And what other breed would tolerate this tomfoolery?

    obrs69dg2652.jpg
    I have an identical photo of my mutt but can't seem to find it otherwise I'd post it. Might be on the gf's phone :(
    His paperwork says lab mix but he's definitely got some a lot of pit bull in him.
  • IVMay
    IVMay Posts: 442 Member
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    lol. That's pretty cool. Like it :)

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