Losing Hope

kherrons
kherrons Posts: 99 Member
edited November 17 in Health and Weight Loss
Before I had my son, I went from 363 to 275 in 10 months. I was the happiest I had been in quite some time. I even managed to maintain my weight during pregnancy.

Unfortunately, it was after he was born that I ballooned back up to 320. With sleep deprivation and the nursing cravings, it was processed carbs all day erryday!

Now he's 18 months and since November I have been trying to find a way to lose weight. I work out 3-4 days a week either hiking or lifting. I have tried several variations with nutrition. I've managed to get down to 285 but for the past 2 months I just keep losing and gaining the same 2lbs! It's so frustrating! I eat maintence calories but then don't eat back exercise. Then, he's still on my boobs allllll the time, so there's the 300 +/- calories that burns. I just don't understand!!! It's like, if I eat less calories I don't lose, but even with my current diet nothing is happening! I'm getting discouraged.

Anyone have advice or experience I can build on?

Currently 285, 2800 cals, 4 days a week for 60-80min.

Replies

  • ladyreva78
    ladyreva78 Posts: 4,080 Member
    edited April 2017
    At 18 months I suspect your son is eating solids to supplement? In this case the 300 +/- might be a bit on the high side for breastfeeding. Also, I've read from others on these forums, that some women have a lot more trouble losing while nursing (hormones?).

    Bottom line is, if your weight is stable, then you are eating at maintenance. This means that to lose weight, you need to eat less than you have been. Calculators give you an estimate of what your energy expenditure can be. It does not mean it will be spot on for you. Since you now have 2 months of data, you know exactly how much you need to maintain.

    Try dropping 250 cals from your daily allowance and reevaluate in 4 weeks (4 weeks because as women, our hormones suck and will mask things). If after 4 weeks you've lost 2lbs (as could be predicted with eating 250 cals less), you can then adapt from there until you reach a rate of loss you and your hormones feel comfortable with.

    The reason I'm suggesting a drop of only 250, is that you are still nursing and I don't want you to risk messing with your milk supply (even if you son is already 18months old and no longer relies on you 100% for his nutrition - the choice on whether to wean him or not is yours and not your diets :wink: ). It's also a less sever cut that your hormones might be able to deal with. I've recently had to go back on BC because of endo and I've been fighting with the hunger for 3 months. This month is the first time since New Year that my scale has registered a loss.

    In the end, don't give up even if it seems hard. Giving up means gaining back even more and I don't think that that would make you any happier.

    Edit: because typing is sometimes difficult...
  • subakwa
    subakwa Posts: 347 Member
    Can you show your calculations there?

    If we ignore the hiking for now, then you need your "normal maintenance" plus breast feeding allowance to not move the scales a jot.

    So, if we put that at 300, and assume your normal maintenance is around 2000 then you have 2300.

    To lose a pound you need a 3500 calorie deficit. Saying your hiking burns maybe 500 calories, which is generous, you'd need 7 days of hiking and not eating back to net off that amount from your maintenance. So that's about 2 weeks on your schedule.

    However, you say you are eating 500 calories more than we estimated here, each day, so over 2 weeks you'll have an excess of 3500, which would be a gain of a lb instead.

    Basically, I think you need to look at your numbers as it sounds like you are on the border of overestimating your exercise and and your maintenance allowance so you probably need to cut your intake down.
  • TimothyFish
    TimothyFish Posts: 4,925 Member
    2,800 calories is right at (with some margin of error) where I would expect your TDEE to be given your activity level. I would suggest lowering your calorie intake to about 2,000 calories. And then lower it by about 100 calories every 15 pounds, but go no lower than 1,200 calories.
  • kherrons
    kherrons Posts: 99 Member
    Based on the IIFYM Tdee calculator, with my intensity and frequency of exercise, topped with the fact my toddler keeps me moving all day until I go to sleep, so I chose active.

    erfnrag2dmrz.png

    I have actually switched my calories around a few times. First it was 2000, then when I just maintained, I upped them with the assumption my body was holding on due to too little fuel.
  • ladyreva78
    ladyreva78 Posts: 4,080 Member
    kherrons wrote: »
    Based on the IIFYM Tdee calculator, with my intensity and frequency of exercise, topped with the fact my toddler keeps me moving all day until I go to sleep, so I chose active.

    erfnrag2dmrz.png

    I have actually switched my calories around a few times. First it was 2000, then when I just maintained, I upped them with the assumption my body was holding on due to too little fuel.

    How long did you stick to the switched numbers before changing again? It usually takes 2-4 weeks to see a result on the scale. Calculators give an estimate. It is then up to you and your results on the scale to adapt.

    Also, your body will not hold onto fat like that. It's physiologically not possible. What can happen is that you retain water (new exercise added, higher stress levels, not enough sleep, hormones, higher than usually salt/carb intake, etc). But your body will not 'hold on due to too little fuel'. That simple does not happen.
  • kherrons
    kherrons Posts: 99 Member
    subakwa wrote: »
    Can you show your calculations there?

    Basically, I think you need to look at your numbers as it sounds like you are on the border of overestimating your exercise and and your maintenance allowance so you probably need to cut your intake down.

    I have a Fitbit, and I know wearables are prone to some error, but most workouts average a 600cal burn, plus daily activity, it says 1200 calories for exercise. Even if that's 50% off, I'm not eating back exercise so that does put me at a deficit. Not a huge one granted, but enough I'd like to think I'd see that scale go down.


  • ladyreva78
    ladyreva78 Posts: 4,080 Member
    kherrons wrote: »
    subakwa wrote: »
    Can you show your calculations there?

    Basically, I think you need to look at your numbers as it sounds like you are on the border of overestimating your exercise and and your maintenance allowance so you probably need to cut your intake down.

    I have a Fitbit, and I know wearables are prone to some error, but most workouts average a 600cal burn, plus daily activity, it says 1200 calories for exercise. Even if that's 50% off, I'm not eating back exercise so that does put me at a deficit. Not a huge one granted, but enough I'd like to think I'd see that scale go down.


    Except that this implies that your painfully accurate with your logging. That you use correct database entries (many are user entered and can be wildly off). That you weigh your food on a scale and don't use cups and spoons for solids.

    A small deficit is extremely hard to maintain if you're not also spot on with your food logging. This is the other half of the equation. If we assume your fitbit is accurate, how accurate are you logging your food?
  • kherrons
    kherrons Posts: 99 Member
    ladyreva78 wrote: »
    n my body was holding on due to too little fuel.

    How long did you stick to the switched numbers before changing again? It usually takes 2-4 weeks to see a result on the scale. Calculators give an estimate. It is then up to you and your results on the scale to adapt.

    Also, your body will not hold onto fat like that. It's physiologically not possible. What can happen is that you retain water (new exercise added, higher stress levels, not enough sleep, hormones, higher than usually salt/carb intake, etc). But your body will not 'hold on due to too little fuel'. That simple does not happen.[/quote]

    I give it 2 weeks. And yes, you're right. I have lost inches and and dropped a size, but I just can't understand why the scale won't move.

    And the lack of sleep as hormones makes total sense.


  • fitmom4lifemfp
    fitmom4lifemfp Posts: 1,572 Member
    edited April 2017
    kherrons wrote: »
    I have actually switched my calories around a few times. First it was 2000, then when I just maintained, I upped them with the assumption my body was holding on due to too little fuel.

    That will NEVER happen. You need to decrease your calories. Also I would consider you to be "lightly active".
  • subakwa
    subakwa Posts: 347 Member
    Bottom line, if you aren't losing weight and you don't have a medical issue, is that you are eating too much.

    The questions being asked are trying to figure out where your theory as to how much you can eat has gone wrong, so that you can make the right corrections to it.

    600 Cala per workout, if your eating was spot on, would give about 1.3lbs per 2 weeks. That is easily within the margin of natural weight fluctuation so you need to give it more than 2 weeks to see a difference.

    I do think your TDEE estimates are high though.
  • ladyreva78
    ladyreva78 Posts: 4,080 Member
    kherrons wrote: »
    ladyreva78 wrote: »

    How long did you stick to the switched numbers before changing again? It usually takes 2-4 weeks to see a result on the scale. Calculators give an estimate. It is then up to you and your results on the scale to adapt.

    Also, your body will not hold onto fat like that. It's physiologically not possible. What can happen is that you retain water (new exercise added, higher stress levels, not enough sleep, hormones, higher than usually salt/carb intake, etc). But your body will not 'hold on due to too little fuel'. That simple does not happen.

    I give it 2 weeks. And yes, you're right. I have lost inches and and dropped a size, but I just can't understand why the scale won't move.

    And the lack of sleep as hormones makes total sense.

    2 weeks might not be enough to see results. Weight loss takes time and consistency and sometimes even then the scale won't reward you. I learned it's better to compare my losses to 1 month ago and not yesterday or even 1 week ago because of our cycles.

  • Mini_Medic
    Mini_Medic Posts: 343 Member
    You lost 35 lbs in 3-4 months! (You said you were stuck for the past two months, so I assumed the loss was from Nov to Jan, forgive me if I read that wrong). That is great losses and fantastic progress. Hopefully that is motivation enough to keep going on this journey. The thing is, you've already lost a substantial amount and you were successful. I would just look at what your activity level and calorie intake were from during the loss. As we lose we need less calories, so the calculations for food is extremely important. Before you could lose eating x higher amount of food with a margin or error for burned calories or incorrect food entries, but now you need y amount to lose at the same rate. If your exercise is pretty consistent, why not drop intake by 100 calories each week until you see a drop in the scale?

    I didn't realize when I lost almost 50lbs that despite running longer/more miles and faster speeds, my burn for a run was the same or even less than before I lost my weight. Bigger bodies burn more calories and you have to make adjustments as you shrink down or the same activity isn't going to burn the same amount it used to. I think from your OP that that is likely the case of your stuck scale. Since you are counting on your exercise to build your deficit, the same exercise is burning fewer calories so your deficit isn't the same and is likely at maintenance now since you haven't seen a loss recently. So you can drop calories a little at a time until you see scale drop again, (I say a little, like 100 each week because you don't want to slow or stop your milk supply), or increase/change up your workouts to try to get a higher burn and increase the deficit you are creating from exercise.

    Good luck!
  • inthegrotto
    inthegrotto Posts: 10 Member
    edited April 2017
    Do you still feel hungry? If not, don't eat.
    Also, you may be gaining muscle, so don't let the scale dictate your victory.
  • StaciMarie1974
    StaciMarie1974 Posts: 4,138 Member
    edited April 2017
    It seems you've been maintaining for the past 2 months and that 2800 cals is thus your current maintenance level INCLUDING exercise. As your son is now eating some solid food (I assume based on age) the breast feeding does not use as much energy as it used to.

    Drop your daily calorie intake to 2300. Track accurately for 4 weeks. Report back.

    Online calculators are only a starting point. They assume your burn rate is normal/average and in reality it might not be. It also assumes your food logging is 100% accurate and lets face it: even if you use a food scale for e*v*e*r*y bite of food that goes in your mouth, there can be errors in database entries, quantity typed in, etc.

    Your actual results: eating at 2800 for the past 2 months and staying at/around 285: means you are eating at maintenance. You're not going to lose weight unless something changes. As in, eat less and/or burn more. You're already fairly active so burning more is probably NOT realistic.

    Of course, if you are not weighing every bite of solid food, it would not hurt to improve your logging accuracy.
    kherrons wrote: »

    Anyone have advice or experience I can build on?

    Currently 285, 2800 cals, 4 days a week for 60-80min.

This discussion has been closed.