Weightloss. Im so over myself. Everything i have tried has failed.

HermosaKas
HermosaKas Posts: 17 Member
edited April 2017 in Health and Weight Loss
I have lost 75 lbs before. Felt great, was awesome, compliments starting rolling in, men started hitting on me, i got complacent. It all crept right back up. 100lbs gained. Now im sitting at 398. Maybe more.

Couple months ago i had a personal trainer. Saw great results even though my diet was still trash. Starving and binging. I was in way better shape though. Now i have gained that weight too.

I know my issues, just cant seem to get around them. Avoidance. I avoid everything that hurts. I put it off.

When it come to the food, i try to eat healthy. I go to the grocery store with a grocery list full of things that are healthy with no ideo how to implement them in a meal. I spend $50 or so of money i dont have. I come home, put it in the fridge and leave it for 3weeks or i try to cook it, and then leave that in the fridge for 3 weeks. I have no idea how to fix this. I dont even effing know how to feed myself. Im 21 and this has been going on and off for 3 years. I can never get it right. It sounds so stupid typing it out, but i. Have. Tried. And this is how it always happens.

The only time im able to cook something and actually eat it is when i cook big pot meals, i.e chilli, tacos, soup. Something where all ingredients are cooked in the same pot. Problem with this is that it often is not balanced, and its the only things i have so it becomes breakfast, lunch, dinner, snack for as long as it exists= binge.

Plus, i cant seem to get rid of the all or nothing mentality- which is to say i keep trying to wright until my diet is in order before i exercise.
I dont mean to sound like a brat, but there are sooo many things i want to do, i want to travel mexico and spain. I want to go back to school. I REFUSE to do it with 200 more lbs in the passenger seat. Please help
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Replies

  • HermosaKas
    HermosaKas Posts: 17 Member
    I dont get that far. I have tried it, yes, but if im continuously falling into a pattern where i cant feed myself, what am i logging?
  • twistedingenue
    twistedingenue Posts: 38 Member
    Start small. Change one habit at a time. From what you've written, it seems like you struggle with meal planning and not knowing how to cook.

    Meal Prepping may be for you. They are often "big pot" meals, divided into daily amounts. I make one big meal each for breakfast and lunch, myself. This week, I have a sweet potato and ground chicken hash with onion/apples for breakfast and steak bites and roasted sweet potatoes and carrots for lunch.

    A quick way to meal prep for a work week might be baked and seasoned chicken, and roasting a sheet pan of your favorite veggies that have been tossed with olive oil and salt and pepper. Add a reasonable amount of rice. BAM, done with your lunches and it's taken about an hour to put it all together. It's also great for the budget too!


    You can also look into a meal delivery service, like HelloFresh, particularly if you have more calories allotted than me. For a single person, each meal kit is two meals AND has the benefit of teaching you how to cook.
  • cheryldumais
    cheryldumais Posts: 1,907 Member
    Your post was inspiring, not because of successes but because of efforts on your part. I so relate. I can't count the times I have joined MFP or WW before. I start out great for maybe a month then blow it to Kingdom Come. I'm back again, "trying" again. Never seems to change. I sit here close to 300 lbs. This just isn't right, there must be something I am missing. Restriction is a b****!!! My emotional make up and personality just don't abide by it well. So this time I am going slow (though I want it yesterday :p ). I am putting myself at losing 1/2 lb per week. It gives me an overflow of calories. Like today, I am under by 200 calories...that makes me feel good, as opposed to blowing it and being over and dealing with the negativity. Well, I'll see how it goes. I wish you all the luck in the world. Your honesty is refreshing and it will help you accomplish your goals.

    Slow and steady wins the race! I applaud you for your wisdom. Take your time and as you have more success you will be more motivated. Plus you will learn so much! Keep going my friend you are doing the right thing.
  • HermosaKas
    HermosaKas Posts: 17 Member
    There are so many things to look at here. First if you are sabotaging yourself perhaps it's time to get some personal counselling? If you don't feel that is the problem maybe you need to see a nutritionist who can help you come up with meals you can make easily and inexpensively. For myself I found I just needed to get started and have some success. The trouble with losing and gaining is that you lose faith that you will actually lose it and keep it off. There are many people in the Maintenance threads who have done it. I read them sometimes for inspiration. I had to learn what I could live with for life. Don't see it as a diet; see it as a lifestyle change. Make changes you can live with permanently. I hate most exercise but I love to walk. I started walking short distances and now walk 6 days a week to get in anywhere from 8000 to 12000 steps a day. Still not a huge amount of exercise but I can do this for the rest of my life. When it came to diet I found certain things I was unwilling to give up. Sour cream for one. I still use 2 tablespoons on a baked potato. I eat a small potato and I'm satisfied with that. I count the calories and if I lose a bit slower but can maintain the loss it's worth it. I've lost 95 pounds from my all time high weight and I'm 60 years old. You can do it. Take your time and do it one step at a time. Don't expect to get skinny overnight but every pound you lose you will feel and look better.

    I have tried to speak to my counselor about it. I have had her since about 16 for probs with depression then, but she is kinda checked out on weightloss. I have explained to her that I stagnate myself and purposely prevent my success because I dont feel like i deserve it being obese, and she wrote it off. I love her, but to her, my weight isnt a huge deal, and she knows all of the things i have accomplished so i guess to her she feels like i will accomplish this as well. But now idk. I know what you guys are saying is correct, and i will do these things, but there is something missing. There has to be a reason this keeps happening to me and i am struggling to find it.

    Today i have not had anything to eat. Its almost 1pm. I go to work 4:45-12:30a today. Probably wont eat until lunch at 7.

    Off the top of my head, i could go to the store now and make a salad. I hate salads, but they are easy. Probably spinach and that already made tyson chicken breast. Add some onion? And then i have a microwave sweet potato. Feel free to throw a better meal in here, you guys. Im all ears
  • HermosaKas
    HermosaKas Posts: 17 Member
    Your post was inspiring, not because of successes but because of efforts on your part. I so relate. I can't count the times I have joined MFP or WW before. I start out great for maybe a month then blow it to Kingdom Come. I'm back again, "trying" again. Never seems to change. I sit here close to 300 lbs. This just isn't right, there must be something I am missing. Restriction is a b****!!! My emotional make up and personality just don't abide by it well. So this time I am going slow (though I want it yesterday :p ). I am putting myself at losing 1/2 lb per week. It gives me an overflow of calories. Like today, I am under by 200 calories...that makes me feel good, as opposed to blowing it and being over and dealing with the negativity. Well, I'll see how it goes. I wish you all the luck in the world. Your honesty is refreshing and it will help you accomplish your goals.

    Thank you. I really hope to see you on the other side of it all *tries to figure out out to add you* and when it comes to my honesty- trust me, i used to be allll about anonymity. I post under anons of hopes of a big reveal when all the weight has been lost- (when my success is a huge barrier to any shame i may feel for having been well over 300 lbs) but i obviously cant do this by myself so im going ALL in. Eff it. I know all about feeling like you're missing something.

    I know i love to be comfortable. I mustve mad this account 4 years ago and can count the number of times i have logged it. Def only used the forums once or twice. Kudos for you for trying to do it slow. Im still not there yet. I know that once i'm truly on track, i can do it- which is why i refuse WLS even though its looking better and better.
  • cheryldumais
    cheryldumais Posts: 1,907 Member
    Going without food all day isn't the best idea. Some people swear by it but for myself I get too hungry then I lose control. If you hate salad then don't eat it. What about some cottage cheese? It's easy to pack quickly and doesn't take any prep. Another idea for another day would be to boil some eggs for a quick grab and go. Protein tends to stick with you longer and if you don't overdo it the calories aren't bad either. When my protein is low I snack on low fat string cheese. One stick is 60 calories. Now some veggies are always a good bet but if you hate them start with fruit. At your current weight although fruit is higher in sugar and calories it has alot of fibre and is again an easy grab and go. Apples are wonderful. Bananas are much higher calorically but again you have some leaway right now because you are burning more calories at your current weight. For snacking my go to is LOW FAT popcorn. At first I thought nah, not gonna taste good but when you are hungry things tend to taste better, lol.

    I'm sorry your counsellor isn't more help. It sounds like you have a good relationship with her otherwise so maybe she could refer you to a nutritionist? I saw one for a while and she was hugely helpful. At first I was not willing to try her suggestions but then I started finding some of her ideas worked and it really helped me alot.

    As for sabotaging yourself I can't say too much here but I am a person of faith and God really helped me see who I am. I don't want to start a battle here on the message boards but I had to at least mention that was huge in helping me to overcome my self-destructive behaviors.
  • PennWalker
    PennWalker Posts: 554 Member
    HermosaKas wrote: »
    When it come to the food, i try to eat healthy. I go to the grocery store with a grocery list full of things that are healthy with no ideo how to implement them in a meal. I spend $50 or so of money i dont have. I come home, put it in the fridge and leave it for 3weeks or i try to cook it, and then leave that in the fridge for 3 weeks. I have no idea how to fix this. I dont even effing know how to feed myself. Im 21 and this has been going on and off for 3 years. I can never get it right. It sounds so stupid typing it out, but i. Have. Tried. And this is how it always happens.

    The only time im able to cook something and actually eat it is when i cook big pot meals, i.e chilli, tacos, soup. Something where all ingredients are cooked in the same pot. Problem with this is that it often is not balanced, and its the only things i have so it becomes breakfast, lunch, dinner, snack for as long as it exists= binge.

    Okay, here's one suggestion.

    You obviously don't like to cook. I don't like it either. I live by myself and have no interest in cooking. Find some quick meals you do like and branch out from there.

    Examples from my day (I'm a vegetarian, but you could adapt to your lifestyle):

    Breakfast: instant oatmeal (yes, evil instant -- it has the same nutrition as the kind you have to cook). Add hot water and you're done.
    I throw in almonds, walnuts, and a sliced apple.

    Lunch and/or dinner:
    Canned soup (I like Amy's brand -- high quality and tastes good)
    Takeout spinach salad (I buy several at a time in small containers to cover 2-3 days)
    Lentils or other beans -- you could cook from scratch or use canned
    Steamed veggies like kale and chopped summer squash -- takes 1 minute prep and a few minutes to simmer.
    Silk Protein Nutmilk (10 g protein per cup and it tastes okay)











  • nrbutton
    nrbutton Posts: 165 Member
    I have a family and a life, I really don't have time to change my whole family's meals so I stick with what we've always eaten and what I know how to cook adding maybe one new recipe a month for "fun" and not cause it's my idea of healthier food. My kids are very active and normal weight and my husband is very muscular so no one else in my family needs to be on a diet and I'm certainly not going to put them on a diet.

    Literally the only thing I've changed is my portions and personal food choices. Do I want 4 eggs or 3 small cookies? I'll take eggs, I'm really hungry
  • stealthq
    stealthq Posts: 4,298 Member
    If I were struggling this much with cooking, I'd get frozen meals with decent nutrition and either sign up for a cooking class or look for cooking tutorials online.

    The other issues are things I don't have any experience with, but if I were seeing a counsellor and they were ignoring problems I was struggling with, I'd be looking for a new counsellor.
  • fitzmonkey13
    fitzmonkey13 Posts: 88 Member
    Maybe your counsellor or doctor could recommend a dietitian? (assuming you have some type of insurance plan that might help to cover the costs)

    You've had success dealing with other issues in counselling, so finding a professional who can help you figure out how to solve your food challenges and teach you about nutrition/cooking might help.

    Also, it sounds like money might be an issue for you from something you said in your OP, so cooking classes might be difficult, but churches and community centres sometimes have inexpensive ones to help you learn how to make the most of your food dollars. Nothing is more expensive than food you throw away.

    Depression and weight gain go hand in hand. If you are too depressed to make your health a priority, it's almost impossible to do the kind of work that healthy meal planning and preparation requires. Kudos to you to keep trying in the face of setbacks. It will never be easy, but keep taking baby steps and it will get easier.
  • heiliskrimsli
    heiliskrimsli Posts: 735 Member
    HermosaKas wrote: »
    There are so many things to look at here. First if you are sabotaging yourself perhaps it's time to get some personal counselling? If you don't feel that is the problem maybe you need to see a nutritionist who can help you come up with meals you can make easily and inexpensively. For myself I found I just needed to get started and have some success. The trouble with losing and gaining is that you lose faith that you will actually lose it and keep it off. There are many people in the Maintenance threads who have done it. I read them sometimes for inspiration. I had to learn what I could live with for life. Don't see it as a diet; see it as a lifestyle change. Make changes you can live with permanently. I hate most exercise but I love to walk. I started walking short distances and now walk 6 days a week to get in anywhere from 8000 to 12000 steps a day. Still not a huge amount of exercise but I can do this for the rest of my life. When it came to diet I found certain things I was unwilling to give up. Sour cream for one. I still use 2 tablespoons on a baked potato. I eat a small potato and I'm satisfied with that. I count the calories and if I lose a bit slower but can maintain the loss it's worth it. I've lost 95 pounds from my all time high weight and I'm 60 years old. You can do it. Take your time and do it one step at a time. Don't expect to get skinny overnight but every pound you lose you will feel and look better.

    I have tried to speak to my counselor about it. I have had her since about 16 for probs with depression then, but she is kinda checked out on weightloss. I have explained to her that I stagnate myself and purposely prevent my success because I dont feel like i deserve it being obese, and she wrote it off. I love her, but to her, my weight isnt a huge deal, and she knows all of the things i have accomplished so i guess to her she feels like i will accomplish this as well. But now idk. I know what you guys are saying is correct, and i will do these things, but there is something missing. There has to be a reason this keeps happening to me and i am struggling to find it.

    Today i have not had anything to eat. Its almost 1pm. I go to work 4:45-12:30a today. Probably wont eat until lunch at 7.

    Off the top of my head, i could go to the store now and make a salad. I hate salads, but they are easy. Probably spinach and that already made tyson chicken breast. Add some onion? And then i have a microwave sweet potato. Feel free to throw a better meal in here, you guys. Im all ears

    That chicken, the sweet potato, and green beans, which you can get in a bag in the produce section and put in a bowl with a few drops of water and microwave steam. Add some salt and pepper and like half a tablespoon of butter and you have a dinner with protein, fat, carbs and fiber that isn't a salad.
  • HermosaKas
    HermosaKas Posts: 17 Member
    Do you have a crockpot? I put chicken breast, a chicken taco seasoning packet, and half a jar of salsa in a crockpot on low for 6 or so hours, shred, put back on for another hour. Then I make a bunch of burritos with the chicken and whole wheat tortillas, refried black beans, and just a little bit of cheese. I wrap them in paper towels and store them in ziplock bags in the freezer. I take one out each day to defrost in the fridge and nuke them for dinner or lunch. You can even just reheat them frozen, just do it on a low power setting for a longer time. You can also use whatever leftover chicken meat you have for taco salads, chili, soup, or whatever else.

    Great! I'll try this. What are you breakfast, dinner, snacks like? Past history says if i do this, ill wait until about 3p eat one or 2 throughout the day and nothing else because i'll get full and it wont be a binge trigger, but i wont eat anything else. Its ridiculous but i always end up starving when i eat clean, at first my appetite plummets and of course thats unsustainable- so goal is to preempt myself this time.

    Dont mind my grocery list
    *chicken breasts
    *Medium salsa
    *Taco seasoning
    *Bell pepper
    *whest wrap
  • red99ryder
    red99ryder Posts: 399 Member
    Any premade TV dinner in your calorie range would do good to start You can expand from there hang in there and good luck
  • Duchy82
    Duchy82 Posts: 560 Member
    edited April 2017
    When you have depression that 'letargy' to do anything about what bothers you and at the same time beating yourself up for the same thing is a hard one to overcome so my answer would be baby steps.

    Why not start with just logging everything you eat, you don't even have to be accurate with weights/volumes just start, once you do that consistently start on the next step which can be accuracy but could also be spend time cooking 1 healthy meal a week or anything else that seems easy, skinny taste is great for well explained recipes, pick something that you like the look off, do that for a while and sure enough you get yourself a repetoire of recipes that you enjoy eating. Or aiming to eat at maintenance, anything like that.

    Keep adding things to once you feel like your last change has become second nature and if you stop just start again at the beginning. This is where you have to work at telling your brain to stop being so negative and get on with it. I recognise a lot of your post in how my husband is too, he struggles with severe depression and very much has that all or nothing approach to a lot in life and the I don't deserve it attitude I tend to have to reduce his to do list and talk some reason with him as his expectations of himself are so high he ends up overdoing it, then it all goes wrong and he does nothing for ages, and berates himself in both scenarios (hope that makes sense). So I advocate small realistic goals/steps whether it be for changing how you eat or increasing exercise and that is not just for you but for anyone that decides they want to lose weight and keep it off.

    You know, it takes about a month to make changes, being consistent, to stick to them so be prepared to be in it for the long haul. You have got this though, putting it all on the forums and asking for help is a great step to take.
  • HermosaKas
    HermosaKas Posts: 17 Member
    So, i thank you guys on all of the posts and i will take every one of them to heart- i thank you for being here with me and letting me vent considering i dont have anyone else to talk to about it- but anyone have advice on the anxiety and nausea thats bubbling up right now for being so present in this moment? Is this normal, does it go away? I guess after so many failures, every time i try something it just feels like im going to puke my guts out.
  • TxTiffani
    TxTiffani Posts: 799 Member
    I love looking at success stories online. It really helps me to see the before and afters and makes me feel like Wow! If they did it I can totally do it! So, maybe finding some success stories that you can watch will give you motivation.

    When it comes to food I'm not big on cooking. I get big bags of precooked Mesquite Grilled Chicken from Sam's club, freezer bags of veggies, and potatoes. I make the potatoes (sweet and russet) and cook them in the oven once a week. I take out my plastic containers once a week and put a frozen precooked chicken breast, some frozen veg, and about 125g of cooked potato in them. I make about 5 at a time for my lunches all week. You could do lunch and dinner for the whole week. I just pop the in the microwave at work for abt 1:30 min and it's delicious, nutritious, and fulfilling:) I like to also slice apples and dip in light n fit yogurt for snacks. It does not have to be difficult. Don't think you have to make elaborate meals. When I'm home I'll micro one of those chicken breasts and eat almost a whole freezer bag of broccoli with it, or a whole can of green beans or green peas:) There's videos on YouTube for meal prepping and a lot of them are very simple.
  • bethanyka
    bethanyka Posts: 159 Member
    i totally understand what you're going through. I'm very "all or nothing" too. I know I can be 100% or i'll be 0% and nothing in the middle. and the cycle comes and goes and when I lose track i'll go days or weeks until I snap out of it. so, you are NOT alone!

    what others have said, start with small things and little steps.

    make easy things to eat - if you don't like salads, don't eat them. wraps and sandwiches can be low calorie and filling, too. if you get the prepared chicken, you can get those microwavable rice cups, or make some rice (that's a cheaper option). add some veg- the bags of frozen vegetables are usually only $1. tuna is easy, or canned salmon, and cheap. I mix them with salsa and some onions and celery.
    I eat a lot of ground turkey (or ground chicken) . ground turkey is often on sale, so i buy a lot and freeze it. you can do a million different things with them. I make ground turkey meatballs, turkey meatloaf, turkey with rice and vegetables, turkey burgers, turkey tacos, turkey chili- the list goes on and on!
    eggs too- cheap and low calorie for 1 or 2, on wheat toast for breakfast keeps me from being hungry til lunchtime.
    and yes chicken breasts- another food that you can prepare a ton of different ways!

    your list is good
    most importantly - don't beat yourself up if you get off track here and there. if you get off track one day, try your hardest to pick yourself up the next day, instead of going on stretches. I know, it's hard. but again, you are not alone in this!
  • kayeroze
    kayeroze Posts: 146 Member
    Hey there, same age and have struggled with weight my entire life too. I would suggest easy healthy cookbooks that serve 4 people (Weight Watchers 20 minute one is pretty tasty) and prep that way. You cook like 3 times a week and the food isn't as monotonous as prepping for an entire week. Breakfast can be smoothies, boiled eggs with toast, instant oatmeal, etc. Super easy foods, and lunch and dinner can be leftovers. Like others have said, I would see if you could get a session or two with a nutritionist about eating habits. I would also suggest that you limit eating out to 3 times or less a week so that you have to cook or prepare something that you have to eliminate waste. And to stay full, try aiming for high protein, high fat foods.
  • Lounmoun
    Lounmoun Posts: 8,423 Member
    edited April 2017
    I think maybe you have an idea that you need to eat a certain way but there are a lot of confusing diets out there and that is a stumbling block. Have you considered seeing a registered dietician for help making a meal plan that suits you?

    You can eat any food you want just the right portion sizes to fit your calorie deficit for weight loss. Protein, fats and fiber help people to be satisfied. Try to meet those goals. For health and satiety you may need to eat a certain way but weight management is still about calories so pay attention to those first.
    Eat food you like and you'll stick to your plan easier. Try to totally change your diet overnight and you'll probably drop it in a few months.
    Put your info into MFP, set a goal of no more than 2 lbs a week.
    Start just logging eating normally. Then work on eating the number of calories you are told to eat for the rate you want to lose at. Log as accurately as you can.
    Expect it to take time to lose. A couple of years even and then putting work into maintaining.


    I've been meal planning for years. I write down a list of 28 dinners for the month and divide it into groups of 7 and shop for the week. I don't plan breakfast or lunches or snacks specifically because I eat a limited number of things for them. I know a large container of yogurt or a loaf of bread lasts a week for me. I keep a grocery list in my kitchen that I add to as I run out of things. Before going shopping I add anything I need for meals for the next week.
    If you don't know how to cook a lot of things or don't feel bothered by eating the same foods there is nothing wrong with eating a limited rotating menu. If you are cooking for 1 consider scaling down recipes or dividing your food and freezing leftovers that you don't want to eat within a couple of days.
    To learn how to cook you could get a kid's cookbook or basic book like Better Homes & Garden's cookbook. They often explain methods and tools and have basic recipes.

    I eat pretty much the same foods I always did just in appropriate portion sizes for my goal. Maybe a slight increase in protein and more vegetables on my plate and less bread or crackers.
    Prelogging helps me stick to my goals. Every morning I log what I will have for dinner, then lunch, breakfast and finally snacks. I tend to eat at the same times every day and the same calorie amounts at those times. Maybe more structure and routine to your daily schedule would help you too.

    I eat between 1200-1400 calories without exercise. If I exercise I eat some of those calories.
    I typically eat like this:
    Breakfast- things like Greek yogurt, granola bars, cereal with milk, sandwich, dinner leftovers, fruit, or cottage cheese (about 200-300 calories)
    Lunch- things like a sandwich, salad, or dinner leftovers (about 300-500 calories)
    Dinner- something different every night of the month. (about 500-600 calories) Soup is awesome! I have soup once a week usually which is great reheated for lunches.
    Snacks- things like fruit, chips, popcorn, pretzels, chocolate, cookies, granola bar, carrots, celery, broccoli, trail mix, eggs, pickles, cottage cheese (about 100-300 calories)


    Things I have planned and had for dinner in recent months include:
    chili, tomato, fassolatha soup, cheese, potato soup, black bean soup, lentil soup, beans & rice, broccoli cheese casserole, tator tot casserole, chicken noodle casserole, breakfast casserole, French toast, breakfast sandwiches, scrambled eggs, oatmeal, pancakes, chicken gyro, batsaria, Greek potatoes & chicken, falafel, fish & mac & cheese, spaghetti with meatballs, chicken yakisoba, hot dogs, veggie burgers, grilled cheese, chicken, quesadilla, tacos, burritos, salsa chicken rice casserole, fried rice, black bean potato nachos, Mexican manicotti, tandoori chicken, chicken legs, burgers, stuffed bread, French dip sandwiches, pizza, ravioli, stuffed cabbage

    I find food ideas on Pinterest a lot.
    http://www.budgetbytes.com
    http://www.skinnytaste.com
    http://www.allrecipes.com
    http://www.kalynskitchen.com/
  • JaiDessaT
    JaiDessaT Posts: 74 Member
    Focus on fiber & protein first, then eat whatever you want, as long as it fits in your calories.

    I tried everything for 15 years. I'd lose & regain. I've lost 47 lbs (and still losing - another 30 lbs until goal), and the only reason I've kept it off for 2+ years, is that I got real with myself. If I hate veggies, I won't eat them. I eat foods I like. If I want a chimichanga, I have one (or 2). You absolutely can do this.

    Try planning your meals on MFP the night before. I always put my treats in first, like ice cream or chocolate. If I don't care what I'm eating, I'll just have high fiber oatmeal & eggs.

    I aim to lose 1/2 to 1 lb each week, and if I want to lose more, I work out (walking or weights).

    Before I got my fitbit, I used my phone to track my steps. A good rule is 30 minutes of any exercise or a 3 mile walk. I did 2 walks for 1.5 miles each.

    Aim for simplicity, at least at first. This was my main grocery list every week:

    Eggs
    Onions
    frozen chimichangas
    Olive oil
    Instant sweetened oatmeal (I put butter & milk in mine)
    Whole milk
    Butter
    Apples
    Bananas
    ham
    cheese
    pita bread
    Rice
    Campbell's split pea soup with ham
    Broccoli

    Weigh everything.

    Also, if you have a food that triggers loss of control, don't bring it home. I can't have potato chips at home. I'll eat a small bag sometimes, when I'm out. I don't bring it home because I lose control and I will eat the entire bag.

    Also, intermittent fasting is great. I eat between 12pm and 8pm. This also allows me, on special occassions, to enjoy a meal out with family & friends without going over. I'll have high fiber oatmeal for lunch and then up to 1400 calories for supper .

    Look at me rambling! I just remember feeling so hopeless and lost. You can do this. MFP has such a huge supportive community, and we've got you.