People Who Comment On What You Eat

2»

Replies

  • Jirachii
    Jirachii Posts: 152 Member
    I don't enjoy constant aggressively sarcastic remarks and spam if that's what you're insinuating.
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,409 Member
    I know it's annoying to live with a brother. I get that, really...but those texts don't look annoying to me. It DOES work to drink more water when you have too much salt. It works to exercise too. Anyway, Chipotle has reasonably good wholesome food (although large portions) Why are you stressing over salt? I mean, a 19 YO shouldn't be needing to worry about salt. Do you have high blood pressure?

    I don't see how those texts are examples of him being a jerk. (?)
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,409 Member
    ...and maybe he prefers white rice. Take turns. White this time, brown the next.
  • Lefty1290
    Lefty1290 Posts: 551 Member
    I've been more active and watching my diet for close to three years now (down 30lbs) and I still get crap from my parents and my family. Very annoying, especially when I don't say anything about their poor choices. I eat what I want and they eat what they want.

    I just ignore it and keep doing my thing. If I let it really get under my skin, I wouldn't be where I am now. I, too, wish my habits would rub off on my parents. My mom keeps saying she wants to lose weight and "I need to watch my carbs," but she never wants to put in the work. She says, "I'll buy stuff for salads" or some other 'quick fix' thing but never does it.
  • Jirachii
    Jirachii Posts: 152 Member
    edited April 2017
    My mom mentioned the rice haha. "We" don't eat brown rice, I'm the only one in the house who eats brown rice. My mom ordered it tonight in her burrito bowl because I choose brown rice over white rice in my lunches, and she's been trying to copy some of my meal choices. The problem with the texts is that my brother then goes on to want to battle me about nutrition for the entire day afterwards. If I ever say ANYTHING regarding food he gets extremely toxic and aggressive, and I get to listen to what an expert he is because his friend is a personal trainer. He's the type to shout over you, not the type to accept that you might want to do something differently.

    Part of why I posted here is because I needed a way to vent without fueling him. My phone was spammed with toxic nonsense shortly after. (More lols in caps and whatnot directly to me instead of the group, more mocking me for trying and trying to give me advice about exercise when exercise was never mentioned.)
  • clicketykeys
    clicketykeys Posts: 6,575 Member
    Man, that sucks. I can understand maybe not wanting to be confrontational, but I'd be tempted to just stare in silent disgust for a beat and then ask "what's WRONG with you?" ;p
  • ent3rsandman
    ent3rsandman Posts: 170 Member
    edited April 2017
    Yeah, I agree with cmriverside on the sodium bit. You don't really need to worry about that unless you have pre-existing issues, as it has nothing to do with weight loss beyond water weight retention (iirc).

    Though I do think your brother's texts were a little obnoxious, he was right about drinking a lot of water to flush them out. That's one of the reasons that water poisoning is a thing - people end up drinking too much and flush out too many of their electrolytes (one of which is sodium).
  • WickAndArtoo
    WickAndArtoo Posts: 773 Member
    Jirachii wrote: »
    In this particular conversation, I originally declined food from chipotle and was asked why. Hence the answer about sodium. I am going to just not use the family chat anymore, but he still does this in person when I can't only respond to my mom.

    All you have to say is "because I don't want it"

    There is no need to ever explain your actions to anyone, stop giving him the opportunity.

    When someone tries to keep me from eating something I just eat it anyways, I tell them it's my body and I will eat what I want... I don't explain whether it fits in my diet or not, it absolutely none of their business. I don't feel guilty if I eat three thousand calories over my budget, because it's my body not anyone else's. Stop letting him get to you and don't bother trying to explain to them why or how or what.

    Let them believe you quit the diet or whatever it takes to get them off the back and stop letting them be privy to your personal information. The more you talk about it with them the more they are going to spew their personal opinions at you, so just do you.

    You are doing an amazing job and you are obviously doing the right and healthy thing so just don't let them bring you down, you should be super proud of yourself!
  • Running_and_Coffee
    Running_and_Coffee Posts: 811 Member
    You can't control what your family does, says or thinks. You can only control how you react to it, and also how much information you provide to them about your diet. I would 100% stop telling them details about your diet. Why do they need to know anything? You can just say, "I want that taco without the sour cream" or whatever and not explain why you can or can't eat sour cream. If they mention your weight loss, say thanks, don't explain how you did it. If they don't say anything about your weight, don't worry about it. Just focus on you and get support elsewhere.
  • Geocitiesuser
    Geocitiesuser Posts: 1,429 Member
    I get most of my meals from meal replacement powders like soylent. The peanut gallery never shuts up about it. Most people on fitness forums have something negative to say about it (like telling me what is or isn't sustainable in MY life), and most people in person look at you like you're nuts and tell you that you need to eat "real food".

    Meanwhile I've been getting most my meals mon-friday like this for over a year and seems perfectly healthy and sustainable for me. But people love to have opinions. I'm not known for my patience, so I just have to take a deep breath, bite my lip, and pretend I didn't hear it.
  • CSARdiver
    CSARdiver Posts: 6,252 Member
    Jirachii wrote: »
    My mom mentioned the rice haha. "We" don't eat brown rice, I'm the only one in the house who eats brown rice. My mom ordered it tonight in her burrito bowl because I choose brown rice over white rice in my lunches, and she's been trying to copy some of my meal choices. The problem with the texts is that my brother then goes on to want to battle me about nutrition for the entire day afterwards. If I ever say ANYTHING regarding food he gets extremely toxic and aggressive, and I get to listen to what an expert he is because his friend is a personal trainer. He's the type to shout over you, not the type to accept that you might want to do something differently.

    Part of why I posted here is because I needed a way to vent without fueling him. My phone was spammed with toxic nonsense shortly after. (More lols in caps and whatnot directly to me instead of the group, more mocking me for trying and trying to give me advice about exercise when exercise was never mentioned.)

    Calmly respond "Who are you trying to convince? Me or you?"

    People don't get angry over information they know is false, they do get upset when their belief system is challenged and they realize they have little to no information to back their claims.
  • BlueSkyShoal
    BlueSkyShoal Posts: 325 Member
    The repeated "LOLing" in caps reminds me of an article I read about how even in their 20s and 30s, a lot of people regard men as "boys" and forgive them if they do stupid crap (assuming they are also middle-class or up, and well-educated, lol. Not so much for poor guys). Like Ryan Lochte (the Olympic swimmer who vandalized a gas station and lied about it), I remember so many people excusing him because "he is just a kid", when he is in fact THIRTY-TWO. Same thing when the CEO of Uber--"I still have a lot of growing up to do". He's 41.

    I hope your brother grows up faster than those two, lol. He sounds annoying.
  • winchestertardisrider
    winchestertardisrider Posts: 21 Member
    As you change those closest to you, especially those who don't have the willpower to make the lifestyle changes you are, tend to come out of the woodwork. The best you can do, is truly decide that this is what you are doing for you. You don't need to run anything by them. They don't need to validate your choices. This is about you. ALL YOU. Not them. Use the forums here to talk and ask questions. You won't find judgement and resentment here. We got your back.
  • RachelElser
    RachelElser Posts: 1,049 Member
    depending on your relationship with your brother, I'd go with "mind you own F-ing business, I said No" Don't engage. With your step dad ask "Why are you getting pissy with me?"
  • Lounmoun
    Lounmoun Posts: 8,423 Member
    Maybe your brother is feeling inadequate or unneeded now that you are getting older.
    Did you have a competitive relationship or a relationship where he was the authority/support because he was older? Maybe things are changing and he feels less important to you.
    Does your brother feel threatened by you or jealous? Like you are a college student... did he go to school? Maybe isn't doing as well as you? Maybe parent focuses more on you?
    His friend is doing great. Maybe he would like to be doing that job and is trying it out.

    I'd think about if he is a basically caring person vs an *kitten*.
    If you think he cares maybe go to him face to face and have a talk about your evolving adult sibling relationship and where boundaries need to be.
  • jemhh
    jemhh Posts: 14,261 Member
    Kepplekakes wrote: »
    So here is what you do. I promise this will work.

    Don't discuss what you are and are not eating with other people regardless of who they are. Its none of their business.

    In my household, it is a big no-no to comment on what someone is eating. What is good for you is not necessarily good for him or your mom or your step dad. And they should have no input. Its tricky but here is how the conversation goes....

    Them: Do you want Chipotle?
    You: No, thank you.
    Them: Why?
    You: Thanks for asking but I have something to eat already.
    Them: @##%#%, etc... *hot air*
    You: Thanks again, but I am good

    End the conversation.

    This is your personal journey. Don't set yourself up for judgement from anyone else. You control this.
    Just don't engage. The going back and forth is just immature.

    This. I probably wouldn't respond after the hot air part but, really, this is how you handle these conversations. You don't *have* to respond to his comments. People (not just you, OP, a lot of people) need to let their NOs be their NOs.
  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
    lynn_glenmont wrote: »
    Accidentally stab your brother with a fork when he gets between you and the food? (What, doesn't everybody use a fork to dish up sour cream?)

    I use a steak knife myself...

Categories