Embarrassed by trying to lose weight

I'm with you - I wouldn't say that I'm embarrassed about trying to lose weight (why should I be? I'm getting healthier!) but my weight loss is definitely something I put in the "nobody else's business" category. I recognize that not everyone is going to be supportive, so I don't mention it to anyone unless I know they're someone that won't offer an unwanted opinion.

Now that the cat's out of the bag with your family though, there's not much you can do except recognize that their opinion doesn't matter. As you said, you've done it before so you *know* you can do it again. If they don't believe you can, forget them; your results will speak for themself. I wouldn't really bother with trying to argue with them or engage about your weight loss. Depending on my mood, I might just placate them, thank them for the advice and smile because I know I'm going to keep on calorie counting, exercising, and doing what I want.

My mother is like that, but not as aggressively. I was always super-thin and muscular naturally until I hit 32....then it all changed. But my mother has been an unsuccessful yo-yo dieter since I was a child and now that I am working out and dieting, she makes negative and nasty comments and I brush them off because I know she's merely terrified that I'll succeed on my first try. Her comments only make me more determined to do it right and maintain it.

Those people are jealous and ashamed of their owen failures and projecting them onto you. If you must say something, I'd be straight up and say "Just because you failed, doesn't mean I will. But either way, your negative comments aren't helpful or in good taste, so I prefer you keep them to yourselves until you want to be the loving, supportive family you SHOULD be."

There's no excuse for tolerating that kind of behavior. Family, friends, coworkers, or ANYONE. Standing up for yourself and your health is part of the permanent, healthier lifestyle you are working for.

xcaranicolex wrote: »

To make a long story short- my husband mentioned in a large family gathering about my working out and tracking calories. First all the ladies (who admittedly are at least a generation older than me and mostly obese) started w the whole thing about how I don't need to lose (I do), that calorie counting will dry my breastmilk and cause my 3 month old to starve (it won't) and making comments about what I ate that day (I already felt bad as I was above my calories for day but chocked it up to the stress of the funeral). Anyway, they all started laughing at me basically saying i wasn't going to lose weight that way, and basically calling me vain for trying.

Prior to pregnancy I had lost 35lbs, so it's not that I don't know I can do it but I ended up feeling so embarrassed! Do you still feel that way? Does that go away? How to you politely respond or cope w ppl like that?

They have no right to be rude and laugh at you, even if they feel bad about being obese when you're trying to be a healthy weight.

They *might* have a right to be concerned about you if you've got your calorie limit set too low.

AFAIK breastfeeding takes care of your calorie deficit and you should have your MFP goals set to "maintain weight".

Kind regards and apologies if you already know this.

This content has been removed.

I am blessed to be the youngest of my large passel of relatives. The fatties already died and the only ones left are the thinny health freaks. The thinny health freaks are old.

Every one will have an opinion. Eventually they will get bored. Laugh it off and carry on with your journey. Just because they can't you can.
Stick on mfp and talk about weight loss all day long if you cant at home.
Good luck

Two threads with the same topic. I'll reiterate what I said in the other. I don't take *kitten* from people. If they want to make negative comments about a positive change I'm making in my life, then they have no business being in my life. Yes, they may be family, but family should be supportive of you genuinely working to make yourself healthier. If all they're giving you is negativity, then they are not people you should be wasting your time with.

Focus on doing what is best for you & your family. The extended family is reacting from ignorance, jealousy, and denial.

My response would be "Well you know I feel like I have to be very careful about my and my family's diet since obesity runs in our family, by the way have you seen Uncle George and his new wife lately? I heard they went to Hawaii?"

xcaranicolex wrote: »

To make a long story short- my husband mentioned in a large family gathering about my working out and tracking calories. First all the ladies (who admittedly are at least a generation older than me and mostly obese) started w the whole thing about how I don't need to lose (I do), that calorie counting will dry my breastmilk and cause my 3 month old to starve (it won't) and making comments about what I ate that day (I already felt bad as I was above my calories for day but chocked it up to the stress of the funeral). Anyway, they all started laughing at me basically saying i wasn't going to lose weight that way, and basically calling me vain for trying.

Prior to pregnancy I had lost 35lbs, so it's not that I don't know I can do it but I ended up feeling so embarrassed! Do you still feel that way? Does that go away? How to you politely respond or cope w ppl like that?

Respond with logic. Is it crazy to balance your checkbook? Is it vain to want to change something for the better?

Remove these people if possible, minimize if family. Understand that their mental process cannot accept you changing for the better, because if you could, they could. They are not ready to accept this and embracing their status as victims.

The best way to handle this is by proving them wrong.

I would (because when people aren't nice to me, I am a TURBO *kitten* back) join in the laughter and say, "Hahaha yeah I should give up and in a few years I'll have some nice curves like you guys!"

Sounds like they're insecure, not to mention rude.