Depression, binging, lost motivation

My life is really hard these days because of 5,5 months of unemployment. I'm really at the deep. I'm trying to be feel good by binging like old days. However It's not working I don't know how to deal. I cannot lose weight about last 3 weeks, I was really doing well with dieting and walking. But I took a rejection from a job application too and I lost myself. I just binged to feel better and tried to vomit but I didn't do. I'm really miserable, I don't know how to change the situation.

Replies

  • Katiebear_81
    Katiebear_81 Posts: 719 Member
    Do you have access to any mental help facilities - even just to see someone every now and then? Binging and purging often needs outside help to resolve.

    I'm sorry you're feeling so low. Wish I had something to say to make you feel better. Try to talk to a professional, ok?
  • lolakinks
    lolakinks Posts: 367 Member
    I'm not willing to see a professional honestly... I always did that but it wasn't very helpful and medications made me gain more weight. But it is always in my mind if I getting worse I'll think again. By the way I don't vomit, I'm not able to do but I wished.
  • LearningToFly13
    LearningToFly13 Posts: 329 Member
    lolakinks wrote: »
    I'm not willing to see a professional honestly... I always did that but it wasn't very helpful and medications made me gain more weight. But it is always in my mind if I getting worse I'll think again. By the way I don't vomit, I'm not able to do but I wished.

    It doesn't have to be medication. You could see a counsellor. I think professional/emotional support will help xx
  • RedSquadronLeader
    RedSquadronLeader Posts: 84 Member
    So sorry you're having a tough time. Maybe stop trying to lose weight for a little while -- it sounds like you need to take care of yourself. So perhaps try to shift your focus mentally to "I'm feeling really miserable, I need to give my body and mind good nourishment so that I stay as healthy and stress-free as possible through this time period." I know I feel better mentally when I'm eating healthy food instead of junk, and when you're already stressed trying to restrict yourself can be just too hard.

    Also, I second talking to someone! A counselor, family member, or good friend (or spiritual leader if you're religious) could be really helpful just to talk out some of the feelings you're having. Hopefully job prospects start looking up for you soon.
  • andyzee69
    andyzee69 Posts: 193 Member
    I'd like to help if I can. I'm going to see my doctor in the next hour about my low mood, as doing nothing about it won't help. Iknow that being rejected for a job is hard, but try not to take it personally. Just try to stay positive. And I agree with RedSquadronLeader about taking a break from the weight loss for a while. Sometimes, eating something a bit high in calories can boost your mood. Just do it in moderation and don't beat yourself up about it as and when it happens. You can still eat the nicer things in life and still lose weight. That's why I find MyFitnessPal a great way to track my calories.

    So, in closing. Stay positive and come to talk on here if it helps. We are all going through weight loss and we can support each other.
  • tinamarie6624
    tinamarie6624 Posts: 182 Member
    I am no expert but I know that I am emotional eater. In the past when things didn't go well for me, I would binge to feel better. As I think you've learned that doesn't help. All over-eating ever did for me was make me feel worse about myself. I had a situation about 6 months into my weight loss program that could have derailed but somehow it didn't. My boss said something horrible to me and although I went to the store, I never even thought about falling into old patterns. It was then that I realized how strong I am. It was then when I decided to channel what used to be emotional eating into exercise. Not only does that help my body but it helps to feel good about my decisions. I have had to learn what triggers set off my old patterns and learn how to deal with those triggers. I had to get my head on straight. It sounds like you know what you want and that is half the battle.

    I hope this helps in some small way. I believe that you can make the right choices but it does take some work to get there.

    I wish you the best wishes on your journey and if you need a friend, I am more than willing to be there for you and offer moral support.

    Tina Marie
  • lolakinks
    lolakinks Posts: 367 Member
    So sorry you're having a tough time. Maybe stop trying to lose weight for a little while -- it sounds like you need to take care of yourself. So perhaps try to shift your focus mentally to "I'm feeling really miserable, I need to give my body and mind good nourishment so that I stay as healthy and stress-free as possible through this time period." I know I feel better mentally when I'm eating healthy food instead of junk, and when you're already stressed trying to restrict yourself can be just too hard.

    Also, I second talking to someone! A counselor, family member, or good friend (or spiritual leader if you're religious) could be really helpful just to talk out some of the feelings you're having. Hopefully job prospects start looking up for you soon.

    Firstly, thank you.
    Yes, you are right I should stop but I had a goal for August. Giving up makes me unhappy too. But can't do anything either... Ok I'll try to not to think about losing weight for a while, until I feel better. I sometimes talk my friends and my partner but not feeling better. I had a friend who is a therapist maybe I can talk with him this week.
  • Geocitiesuser
    Geocitiesuser Posts: 1,429 Member
    You have to keep your chin up and weather the hard times. I think we have all "been there", and we all deal with stress differently. I wish there was a better way, or better advice I could give, other than, "You have to be strong". Mostly you have to be strong for you! The only person who is going to be able to make things better is YOU.

    Who knows, maybe being strong about your diet will help you stay strong about other things too. Or maybe being strong about the employment situation will help you be strong about the diet. Confidence bleeds over. Find just one thing, take a baby step. Use it as a stepping stone. Most of all, no matter how difficult it is, you gotta be strong!

    Good luck OP!
  • lolakinks
    lolakinks Posts: 367 Member
    andyzee69 wrote: »
    I'd like to help if I can. I'm going to see my doctor in the next hour about my low mood, as doing nothing about it won't help. Iknow that being rejected for a job is hard, but try not to take it personally. Just try to stay positive. And I agree with RedSquadronLeader about taking a break from the weight loss for a while. Sometimes, eating something a bit high in calories can boost your mood. Just do it in moderation and don't beat yourself up about it as and when it happens. You can still eat the nicer things in life and still lose weight. That's why I find MyFitnessPal a great way to track my calories.

    So, in closing. Stay positive and come to talk on here if it helps. We are all going through weight loss and we can support each other.

    Thank you for your support. Maybe I should choose fruit to feel better. I love them too, but when I'm sad I feel like I should eat processed food, sugar, chocolate, chips etc something bad...
  • turkey2swan
    turkey2swan Posts: 19 Member
    Hey lolakinks, I'm so sorry you are going through this hard time right now. *BIG HUG* You are not alone and it sounds like you have friends and a partner who love you very much.

    What I can tell you, from experiencing the same feelings, is that those feelings don't last. I know it sucks right now and that getting up and out outside (or even out of bed) may be a real struggle but every time you do something positive (get outside, eat some fruits or veggies, listen to uplifting music, or go for a walk) it will become a little easier. When you catch yourself having negative self-talk try and take a step back and realize those are just thoughts not TRUTHs.

    I highly recommend you speak with your therapist friend or reconsider finding a counselor/psychologist (no meds) and work with them for a bit.

    You can do this and you will be OK. I'm here if you need a friend.

    One of my fav quotes:

    “Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise.”
    ― Victor Hugo, Les Misérables
  • lolakinks
    lolakinks Posts: 367 Member
    edited April 2017
    I am no expert but I know that I am emotional eater. In the past when things didn't go well for me, I would binge to feel better. As I think you've learned that doesn't help. All over-eating ever did for me was make me feel worse about myself. I had a situation about 6 months into my weight loss program that could have derailed but somehow it didn't. My boss said something horrible to me and although I went to the store, I never even thought about falling into old patterns. It was then that I realized how strong I am. It was then when I decided to channel what used to be emotional eating into exercise. Not only does that help my body but it helps to feel good about my decisions. I have had to learn what triggers set off my old patterns and learn how to deal with those triggers. I had to get my head on straight. It sounds like you know what you want and that is half the battle.

    I hope this helps in some small way. I believe that you can make the right choices but it does take some work to get there.

    I wish you the best wishes on your journey and if you need a friend, I am more than willing to be there for you and offer moral support.

    Tina Marie

    Thank you for your nice wishes. I want to exercise too. I've tried last month about 10 days, I was really motivated, then I lose it I became more depressive. Now I cannot go out. I feel all your support when I talk people at here. I hope I'll back.
  • lolakinks
    lolakinks Posts: 367 Member
    Thank you all I really feel you!
  • kknight899
    kknight899 Posts: 10 Member
  • happysherri
    happysherri Posts: 1,360 Member
    So sorry you are having a rough time. I struggled with really bad depression for years. Talking with a professional and the medications helped me. I hope that you give it another try. Maybe those professionals weren't the right fit for you, same with the medication. Find your happy. You mentioned you are unemployed and that does suck, but you need to find joy in life. I've been unemployed, fat, skinny, fit, divorced, mom on hospice then passing, etc... Everyone's battles are different but everyone has struggles. You need to do what you need to do. Maybe focus on your spiritual self and then come back to focusing on the weight.

    Challenge - do something that makes you happy today - no matter how small, and truly be in the moment. Smelling a flower, enjoy it. Drawing or coloring a picture. Taking a walk in the sun (or rain). Each day find something that makes you happy and repeat. I still use techniques I learned in therapy, even thought I have been without depression for years.

    Don't be too hard on yourself and practice positive self talk.