Why do you want to lose weight?

Partly it was for health reasons; I felt rundown and lacked energy.

Partly it was because I wanted to look good in some styles of clothing that, at the time, didn't look that great on me.

Partly it was curiosity: what would I look like at a healthy weight? How would my body change?

For the rest of it . . . kind of the opposite of a lot of people's experiences. Instead of feeling increasingly isolated and terrible, I was actually feeling more positive and happy than I had before. I had always had a good many acquaintances but had a hard time making close friends. But then within the space of a year I decided, no, I WAS going to fight through my social anxiety and do my level best to connect with others, and I made some close friends. I started feeling better about myself, whereas I'd felt kind of resigned to feeling isolated before.

Once I started actually liking myself, I made a lot of changes. Cut my hair, which in retrospect made me look really frumpy before. Dyed it, because I'd always wanted to do that but never had the nerve. (I used to really dread people noticing me, because of my social anxiety, so I would avoid making changes that would make people comment, even if the comments were positive. Social anxiety is a terrible burden, and I'm really lucky that I was able to get mine under control without needing medication.)

So along with the other changes, I also decided to finish losing weight. I say "finish" because I had started at 200 and successfully gotten down to 165-170 and stayed there for a year. So I knew the basics of "how" to lose weight. But this time I was much more disciplined, much more determined, and I finally conquered my habit of binging.

My friends weren't directly involved in my weight loss journey, I didn't even tell them about it. But they have had such a huge positive impact on my life and I'm so grateful for them.

Other than wanting to look good, I want to feel good and have more confidence. I'm tired of being anxious about doing things, like hiking, going to the beach, etc because of my weight.

I'm tired of seeing pictures of myself and feeling humiliated and nauseated. I love photography, and I want to be able to look through family photos with fond memories and happiness rather than frustration and embarrassment. I don't want to have to choose between invisible and humiliated anymore.

Thank you for your kindness. I just won an award at school. My picture was in the paper, and I am ashamed to say that I was so humiliated by the photo that I couldn't enjoy the honor. We are going to the beach next month and I am already feeling anxious about vacation pics. If only there was a way to drop thirty pounds in a few weeks. (I am doing this the slow, sustainable CICO way, despite the temptation to try fads and gimmicks.)

I'll be honest. I'm reallly healthy the weight I am at now, but I want to be even healthier. Looking better is just a bonus. I'm not doing this for aesthetic reasons.