Trying to eat better but hubby doesn't have too....

ReadyToGetHealthy2016
ReadyToGetHealthy2016 Posts: 6 Member
edited November 18 in Motivation and Support
Hi everyone, I just came back to MFP and started with a new profile as I couldn't for the life of me get in LOL. In 2014 I was able to use MFP to get close to my goal weight, the problem was I had to have 3 meals a day totally different then my family to do that. My husband is the cook in the family (I can cook great but he just prefers his cooking) and he likes cheese burgers, pizza, hot dogs, basically yummy food that isn't that healthy. When he wants to lose weight he stops drinking soda and BOOM 15 pounds are gone. He also said, and I agreed, that having to have 3 separate meals for me as well as for him and the family isn't doable. So I went back to just eating what they ate, and gained all my weight back and more :-( I am currently 155 and want to be 140, so I decided I'd do a separate breakfast and lunch, then family dinner to see if that helps even it out. I'm doing a meal replacement shake for breakfast and salad, frozen diet lunch or tuna fish sandwich for lunch. I'm going to eat the family dinner but just less.

Two question:

1). I'm having a hard time trying to figure out how to track dinner, do I just search for what my husband made and select the one with the highest calories? He makes foods without a recipe, his food is ALWAYS great, but I have no clue what is in it.

2). If you're also in this situation, what are some ways you're being successful at weight loss when the family isn't eating the best?

Thanks in advance for your guidance and support.

Replies

  • Xymheia
    Xymheia Posts: 65 Member
    edited April 2017
    In addition to meal prepping your own meals, you can for example consider family meals cheat meals. However, if you also have children, I'd say it's important that they are taught how to prepare fresh food and that they eat nutritious food most of the time as well, so it's not bad to nag them a little. ;) A family friendly way to do this for dinner (it's also what we did when I was little), is for example making homemade wholegrain pizza together with fresh toppings (onion, bell pepper, tomatoes, fresh herbs, etc.). It's still pizza, so nice, but healthy, and you get to pick your own toppings so you can skip the high cal things - pizza base is quite easy to make. Also, using wholegrain wraps or vegetable wraps (like kale) instead of flour wraps, wholegrain pasta instead of flour pasta, etc., is fairly easy to do. Easy options for, say breakfast, are overnight oats, Greek yogurt with fruit, alternative pancakes (wholegrain or veggie), a fruit and veggie shake. For lunch something like wholegrain bread sandwich, wholegrain wraps, scrambled eggs with veggies, etc.

    I don't use recipes either and really like comfort food like lasagna, but because I cook with fresh foods and take care not to add too much fat, milk, cheese, meat, etc., don't eat too much during the day and don't eat the very calorie rich foods too often (once a week or so), I can easily maintain my weight even without tracking.
  • RuNaRoUnDaFiEld
    RuNaRoUnDaFiEld Posts: 5,864 Member
    Will your husband not log it for you as he cooks?

    My husbands calories are way different to mine but I log both diarys as I cook.
  • thanks for the suggestions! No, he doesn't log his food, he isn't on MFP. he also can't make the same recipe twice as its "a little of this, a little of that" kinda cooking....he's an odd one :-)
  • Geocitiesuser
    Geocitiesuser Posts: 1,429 Member
    Or ask him what he put in it and how much. Even if he's eyeballing it out, it's better than just randomly choosing something from the database.
  • Chef_Barbell
    Chef_Barbell Posts: 6,644 Member
    Cook for yourself.
  • kimothy38
    kimothy38 Posts: 840 Member
    How about if you ate a small portion of what is made for dinner, then bump it up with veges? My meals are either completely different to what the rest of the family when I'm fasting, or they look similar but have a load more veges.
  • ilex70
    ilex70 Posts: 727 Member
    Know a bit about this one. Haven't been doing the best lately myself which is what lead me here.

    Married to a guy that likes to go out to eat as entertainment and likes to make recipes...usually ones with lots of high calories/high fat ingredients that don't work for me as far as maintaining a healthy weight.

    He actually admitted this week that he misses us going out to eat a lot even though he does know that it doesn't work for me.

    And he resents me having different/special food too. Usually we don't grocery shop together, but today while we were out I remember I needed some more low cal popcorn and I got push back on that..."I know you don't eat a lot, but you have all this special stuff".

    So, yeah, separate breakfast/lunch/snacks for sure. If he insists on making just one dinner then maybe ask that he keeps some of the meat out for you so you can weigh that and then just add your own side if the sides he makes aren't a good fit, or if he is making something where it is all cooked together and high calorie...e.g. chicken fettuccine alfredo, or some other mixed together with a fattening sauce dish. Salads and frozen veggies are pretty quick and easy to make a single serving.
  • Are we married to the same person? This is literally my problem except my husband is greatly offended if I refuse to eat his food and he hates healthy replacements and whines about it. I eat great all day and then eat his dinners...I try to cook but I hate cooking and he complains.

    ha yes...my husband is the clone of yours!

  • ilex70 wrote: »
    Know a bit about this one. Haven't been doing the best lately myself which is what lead me here.

    Married to a guy that likes to go out to eat as entertainment and likes to make recipes...usually ones with lots of high calories/high fat ingredients that don't work for me as far as maintaining a healthy weight.

    He actually admitted this week that he misses us going out to eat a lot even though he does know that it doesn't work for me.

    And he resents me having different/special food too. Usually we don't grocery shop together, but today while we were out I remember I needed some more low cal popcorn and I got push back on that..."I know you don't eat a lot, but you have all this special stuff".

    So, yeah, separate breakfast/lunch/snacks for sure. If he insists on making just one dinner then maybe ask that he keeps some of the meat out for you so you can weigh that and then just add your own side if the sides he makes aren't a good fit, or if he is making something where it is all cooked together and high calorie...e.g. chicken fettuccine alfredo, or some other mixed together with a fattening sauce dish. Salads and frozen veggies are pretty quick and easy to make a single serving.



    Great idea! I'll eat a small portion of the mixed up menu...because you're right he does a lot of combo meals like that...and have a salad or those steam fresh veggies which are quick and easy with no added dishes! Thank you!
  • TonyB0588
    TonyB0588 Posts: 9,520 Member
    @ReadyToGetHealthy2016 Maybe you can compromise with portion sizes. Eat the same things as him, but in smaller amounts. Can you ask him to skip the cheese off your burger, or perhaps eat yours without the bread?
  • Penthesilea514
    Penthesilea514 Posts: 1,189 Member
    Oh my gosh- this is just like my husband and I. I make my own breakfast/lunch/snacks and try to save extra calories for his dinners when he makes them. And he is a total "little bit of this, little bit of that" kind of person. He also hates vegetables- I was happy he made these fresh green beans to go with dinner the other week until I took a bite and they were covered in butter :( Delicious, but hard to track. I try to help when I can but I am working full-time and at the moment he is not, so dinner is mostly done by the time I get home. It has taken a bit of time, but I have been challenging myself to make sure half of my plate is fresh veggies and have asked him to put all "extras" like butter or cheese on after I get my portion. It has been hard, but working together we have found ways to make it more manageable.
  • TonyB0588 wrote: »
    @ReadyToGetHealthy2016 Maybe you can compromise with portion sizes. Eat the same things as him, but in smaller amounts. Can you ask him to skip the cheese off your burger, or perhaps eat yours without the bread?

    That's a great idea! yes I can definitely do that! Thank you.
  • sara126
    sara126 Posts: 6 Member
    My husband is the same ! When I go on low carb diet , I open the pantry and he's heaped it up with muffins , biscuits covered with chocolate, lollies ... we never ever run out of Nutella!
    And every time I go on a Fast/cleanse diet , he take a way a pizza & put it on my lap !
  • lorrpb
    lorrpb Posts: 11,463 Member
    Is he willing to help track at least the major ingredients? For example, a dish with ground beef, tomatoes sauce, rice, olive oil. The seasonings & veggies don't matter that much for calories. Or, make yourself a salad & veggies then eat a smaller portions of the main dish. You are lucky to have a husband who cooks!
  • hkjones22
    hkjones22 Posts: 8 Member
    I ask my husband to eat healthy with me in our meals that we have together :( He's reluctant at first but when he gets the health benefits he starts enjoying it.

    It's seriously the only way I can stay on track... I'm too tempted otherwise.
  • alaskandelight
    alaskandelight Posts: 24 Member
    edited May 2017
    I definitely end up searching on MFP for the "comfort food" prepared by my husband and go for what seems like the highest estimate. Who does the shopping? A really good way of keeping tabs is by buying healthy and logging/pre-portioning upon arrival into the house. (e.g. low fat sour cream vs. high, extra lean beef vs. 85%) Given that he loves to cook, ask him to do a weekly healthy recipe experiment...iron chef style. (you choose a healthy-unfamiliar ingredient and he has to make a meal with it.) Get the whole family in on it, make it something you all look forward to judging if its a keeper recipe or if it's a loser. Leftovers (on loser nights) = healthy meal prep for you that's probably better than lean cuisine. This approach has helped us try new recipes and preparations that focus on healthy new foods that neither of us has ever tried. There are definitely winners and loser in our house. (mock buffalo wings with cauliflower = awesome vs. cauliflower fried rice = meh) Some ingredients just need to be tweaked and deserve a second chance (quinoa is far more tolerable cooked in broth). Eating healthy can be an adventure! He can keep his "little of this n that approach," but the whole point is to make a healthy meal taste good! Hope that helps!
  • bbell1985
    bbell1985 Posts: 4,571 Member
    So you like...ask him what's in it.

    My boyfriend is a marathon runner. He can eat at least 4,000 calories per day. When he cooks, I can usually have the veg but not the grain, and the fish. I have to put aside calories for oil because he is not going to lay off it and I won't make him. His and hers.
  • Lovee_Dove7
    Lovee_Dove7 Posts: 742 Member
    edited May 2017
    Hi everyone, I just came back to MFP and started with a new profile as I couldn't for the life of me get in LOL. In 2014 I was able to use MFP to get close to my goal weight, the problem was I had to have 3 meals a day totally different then my family to do that. My husband is the cook in the family (I can cook great but he just prefers his cooking) and he likes cheese burgers, pizza, hot dogs, basically yummy food that isn't that healthy. When he wants to lose weight he stops drinking soda and BOOM 15 pounds are gone. He also said, and I agreed, that having to have 3 separate meals for me as well as for him and the family isn't doable. So I went back to just eating what they ate, and gained all my weight back and more :-( I am currently 155 and want to be 140, so I decided I'd do a separate breakfast and lunch, then family dinner to see if that helps even it out. I'm doing a meal replacement shake for breakfast and salad, frozen diet lunch or tuna fish sandwich for lunch. I'm going to eat the family dinner but just less.

    Two question:

    1). I'm having a hard time trying to figure out how to track dinner, do I just search for what my husband made and select the one with the highest calories? He makes foods without a recipe, his food is ALWAYS great, but I have no clue what is in it.

    2). If you're also in this situation, what are some ways you're being successful at weight loss when the family isn't eating the best?

    Thanks in advance for your guidance and support.

    I have to eat "my way", not what everyone else is eating. It wouldn't work for me to eat my husband's dinner. I need to weigh my food and eat the food that's best for me. That's just me.

    When I ate differently, my whole family followed my example. I didn't expect that! It actually made it a little harder for me, because I had to stock enough for them to eat "my way." They STILL eat "my way". Total shock!

    Recently I made the following salad when company came over, as a snack. The wife was saying her family and husband don't like vegetables. This made me smile, because I had learned what it means to lead by example. They ALL ate this salad, even the children, and the husband said he would eat this for breakfast (which is exactly what I eat for breakfast, lunch and dinner....lots of veggies).

    SALAD
    mixed baby spring mix salad greens (chopped)
    finely diced celery
    feta cheese (or blue cheese crumbles)
    crumbled bacon
    roasted pistachios (I get the unsalted from Trader Joe's)
    dried cherries or cranberries

    vinaigrette:
    red wine vinegar
    olive oil
    touch of garlic powder
    big dose of italian herbs
    unrefined salt
    stevia to sweeten

    Here's how I ate to lose weight (and my family copied me, even though they didn't need to lose weight)
    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/group/108738-hormone-resetters



  • amandatapar
    amandatapar Posts: 246 Member
    Prep your own food. I have 5 kids, work full time plus PRN but that doesn't mean my husband and kids have to eat the same as I do.
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