Feeling so hopeless, helpless and generally demoralised.
sheps1990
Posts: 26 Member
I am utterly desperate right now so sorry if this post seems a little over dramatic!
I have lost a considerable amount of weight before but as an emotional eater, depression and loneliness due to commencing a highly stressful job in a new city, saw me falling off the bandwagon and back into my comfort eating. I finally found myself back in the zone having changed jobs and locations and feel I got my zest back. It's been 6 weeks that I've been swimming regularly and using the app to track my food intake. I purposely avoided the scales as they tend to dictate my mood and I find them counterproductive if I see a higher number, thus go on to sabotage my efforts. Well, I finally weighed myself and not a single pound lost, I'm so down right now.
Here is me when I began on the left and this is me last week on the right, I'm honestly thought I could see a difference but since the scale check, I think Ive been looking through rose tinted glasses and it's been a placebo - I really want an outside opinion on this.
What can I do to get the weight down without going to extremes, I'm asking from utter desperation.
Many thanks for any input.
I have lost a considerable amount of weight before but as an emotional eater, depression and loneliness due to commencing a highly stressful job in a new city, saw me falling off the bandwagon and back into my comfort eating. I finally found myself back in the zone having changed jobs and locations and feel I got my zest back. It's been 6 weeks that I've been swimming regularly and using the app to track my food intake. I purposely avoided the scales as they tend to dictate my mood and I find them counterproductive if I see a higher number, thus go on to sabotage my efforts. Well, I finally weighed myself and not a single pound lost, I'm so down right now.
Here is me when I began on the left and this is me last week on the right, I'm honestly thought I could see a difference but since the scale check, I think Ive been looking through rose tinted glasses and it's been a placebo - I really want an outside opinion on this.
What can I do to get the weight down without going to extremes, I'm asking from utter desperation.
Many thanks for any input.
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Replies
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You look good IMO, in both pictures. If you are overweight, it's not by much. I would get rid of the scale. You were feeling healthy and great and now suddenly a scale set you off. That is not healthy and is unkind--toward yourself. Get rid of the scale, continue tracking and exercising, and drop 75 calories off your daily allowance. Weigh yourself in September.10
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Use a tape measure instead of a scale. You are not massively overweight and if you are exercising your weight might not change much even as your inches go down. Are you using a food scale? If not is it impossible to track foods such as pasta and cereals accurately so you might not be eating at the calorie deficit you think you are.2
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Hi, I know how you are feeling. I fell off the wagon myself recently, but trying to get back on it in a big way this week. I've been suffering with bouts of depression too, and I'm finding it more and more difficult to go the gym, I just comfort eat and it's starting to get out of hand now but I'm going to try and make a proper go of it. After I did my bootcamp and my bout of glandular fever, I got down to 16st 9lb and that was 12 months ago, now I'm back up to 18st 8lb and I'm so angry and frustrated with myself, not to mention upset.
With regards to the pictures you have posted, in both of them you look really really well. If you hadn't have said which picture is which, then I would said that the left picture was after your weight loss but it might be because you are wearing two different outfits (plus I'm a guy so i'm useless at that type of stuff!)
I've been trying extremes like starving myself and I've been told in no uncertain terms not to do it, all I've been told is to watch what I eat, and exercise, but it's really difficult. I won't even go swimming because I think I look horrible and I don't want anyone else to see me.
I hope you manage to get out of the plateau you are currently on!
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You need a new scale or need to toss it period... YOU look amazing!4
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If you don't want to use a scale--use measurements once a week. If you're not losing, you're not in a deficit. Without a digital food scale it will be hard to know how much you are eating. You don't have much to lose so it's harder and slower.2
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Hello, you do look thinner in the right hand side picture, in your arms and thighs. Hang in there and be patient. (I know the feeling). Maybe you just had one of those «water weight» bloated days ? Try again in a week. Good luck !1
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I am sad that someone as beautifully proportioned as you would feel hopeless and helpless. Can you start from self love and work from there?13
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You look great and that's not b.s. I was recently doing great until sciatic nerve pain from spinal stenosis stopped me in my tracks. I quit tracking good, eating right; couldn't work out for about 8 weeks due to the pain. But I started back this week. Depressing at first but just keep at it.3
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It's hard to tell in different outfits, slightly different poses etc. Measurements would be a good guide if you don't want to weigh yourself.
You mention tracking your food, but how are you determining how much you're eating? You may need to tighten up your logging - do you weigh (solids/semi-solids) and measure (liquids) everything you eat and drink? Are the entries you've picked from the database correct?2 -
I see a difference in your chest and arms. Just keep at it and be diligent with your logging. A few mistakes can really make a difference. You don't have a lot to lose, so you have to be meticulous.2
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you look great girl, don't worry so much! I totally get wanting to look and feel your best though. i'm all about pilates these days for shrinking the waistline and just generally firming everything up, have you ever tried? you can do some simple exercises at home that can help tighten you up and show definition in arms, waist and thighs without having to go all crazy with the dieting. I agree with someone else above, your proportions are beautiful in both pics as you are 1
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Plus remember time passes anyway, if you maintain that's better than gaining and if you give up gaining is almost guaranteed, try focussing your goals on fitness challenges and healthy eating with appropriate portion sizes rather than your weight.1
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You look fantastic! Maybe try to lift a bit and continue eating at maintenence to see if that tightens things up?
Also, you should feel great! You didn't gain any weight! That means that whatever you're eating must be accurate for maintaining.1 -
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Thank you all so much for the replies. I think I will definitely need to start taking measurements as many have suggested. Also regarding, leaving the scales alone, I think that is a good idea, as like has been pointed out, I was back in the zone and feeling pretty spritely until I saw that number.
As for the photos, like some of you have pointed out you think my arms look a bit smaller, I thought that was the case but didn't mention it as I wanted to see if anyone else saw it, I really thank you for some honest feedback.
With regards to measuring food, this is something I have not been doing and I have been guessing measurements like 1 cup of rice.
Also, regarding overall body image, I forgot to mention that I am working as an English teacher in China. As the population here are what I consider skinny as a whole, it is hard to find shops that sell clothes in my size. My Chinese colleagues are very critical and what offends us in the west is just considered telling it like it is over here.
Another thing I haven't mentioned is that I am addicted to Diet Coke - I can easily drink at least two bottles every day. Is there really truth in giving up a 0 calorie drink and getting slimmer? I might try to curb this habit and see if, in any way, this can give me better results.
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Thank you all so much for the replies. I think I will definitely need to start taking measurements as many have suggested. Also regarding, leaving the scales alone, I think that is a good idea, as like has been pointed out, I was back in the zone and feeling pretty spritely until I saw that number.
As for the photos, like some of you have pointed out you think my arms look a bit smaller, I thought that was the case but didn't mention it as I wanted to see if anyone else saw it, I really thank you for some honest feedback.
With regards to measuring food, this is something I have not been doing and I have been guessing measurements like 1 cup of rice.
Also, regarding overall body image, I forgot to mention that I am working as an English teacher in China. As the population here are what I consider skinny as a whole, it is hard to find shops that sell clothes in my size. My Chinese colleagues are very critical and what offends us in the west is just considered telling it like it is over here.
Another thing I haven't mentioned is that I am addicted to Diet Coke - I can easily drink at least two bottles every day. Is there really truth in giving up a 0 calorie drink and getting slimmer? I might try to curb this habit and see if, in any way, this can give me better results.
Nope Diet Coke doesn't make you fat, too many calories does, if you're not weighing food that's where you need to start, guessing measurements is where most people find they are going wrong. Buy a foodscale, you can get them cheap enough. I found particularly with dry foods like cereal, pasta and rice, I was way off the correct weights and eating almost double calories to what I thought I was.
As for the scale, bear in mind us women get it pretty tough with hormonal fluctuations, it's normal to fluctuate as much as 5lb throughout the month, not just during or before your period.
Check out the below chart, it has some great tips for tightening up your logging.
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It sounds like your Chinese colleagues aren't that much different from Americans..
It's a completely different culture and viewpoint so I know that this is easier to say than do but I wouldn't pay them any mind and would even say something like well in America I'm pretty hot so thanks for your opinion but no thanks.0 -
I've realised as some have suggested, I'm not accurate enough with my portions. I realise that when I scan some items, it only accounts for 1 portion of an item sometimes even though I eat the whole thing. So many calories unaccounted for.0
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Its always a surprise when I weigh my food -- not so good at guessing portions. Most of the time it is too much food, but sometimes too little. I like weighing -- takes the guess work out. Also when I fall off my plan I like this saying. What is success??? Fall down seven times -- get up eight times.0
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A typical staff lunch which varies every day. I'll usually eat the shrimps and some fries and leave the rest. But ultimately, I think this is my downfall as I will not be getting my measurements right.
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Geez I'd pack a lunch before eating any of that slop.1
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Well today, they gave us pork, beef, curried potatoes. I ate half of the curried potatoes then asked for some lotus plant and green veggies. I ate those, chucked the rest and have come home to have two boiled eggs and an apple. Hopefully if I continue this way I can still eat bits of staff meals (thus not offend the chef) and lose weight.2
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Well today, they gave us pork, beef, curried potatoes. I ate half of the curried potatoes then asked for some lotus plant and green veggies. I ate those, chucked the rest and have come home to have two boiled eggs and an apple. Hopefully if I continue this way I can still eat bits of staff meals (thus not offend the chef) and lose weight.
Could you ask for food to be prepared without sauces etc?have extra salad and vegies? That may make things a bit easier?1 -
livingleanlivingclean wrote: »Well today, they gave us pork, beef, curried potatoes. I ate half of the curried potatoes then asked for some lotus plant and green veggies. I ate those, chucked the rest and have come home to have two boiled eggs and an apple. Hopefully if I continue this way I can still eat bits of staff meals (thus not offend the chef) and lose weight.
Could you ask for food to be prepared without sauces etc?have extra salad and vegies? That may make things a bit easier?
Ive actually just asked if, from now on I could have the vegetarian option which some of my other colleagues have and he is fine about it so I will look forward to more veggie-filled trays from tomorrow.
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First of all, you're really well built and a nice healthy weight. I know it must be hard in your position, but try not to compare yourself to people with completely different genetics! Just because a Chinese xl is the same as an American medium doesn't mean you need to lose weight.
It looks like you are more toned in the second photo (and also maybe wearing a better bra).0 -
Hi OP - with regards to your Diet Coke thing, I drink loads of diet drinks (Pepsi Max or Coke Zero at the moment) and am still losing
You have such a great body on the way there, keep working at it and don't worry if you can't see results just with your naked eye - you see yourself every day so it's understandable if you can't see obvious progress.0 -
livingleanlivingclean wrote: »Well today, they gave us pork, beef, curried potatoes. I ate half of the curried potatoes then asked for some lotus plant and green veggies. I ate those, chucked the rest and have come home to have two boiled eggs and an apple. Hopefully if I continue this way I can still eat bits of staff meals (thus not offend the chef) and lose weight.
Could you ask for food to be prepared without sauces etc?have extra salad and vegies? That may make things a bit easier?
Ive actually just asked if, from now on I could have the vegetarian option which some of my other colleagues have and he is fine about it so I will look forward to more veggie-filled trays from tomorrow.
I would have asked for more protein... Vegie based will still be very carb dense (probably more so!) not just vegetables0 -
livingleanlivingclean wrote: »livingleanlivingclean wrote: »Well today, they gave us pork, beef, curried potatoes. I ate half of the curried potatoes then asked for some lotus plant and green veggies. I ate those, chucked the rest and have come home to have two boiled eggs and an apple. Hopefully if I continue this way I can still eat bits of staff meals (thus not offend the chef) and lose weight.
Could you ask for food to be prepared without sauces etc?have extra salad and vegies? That may make things a bit easier?
Ive actually just asked if, from now on I could have the vegetarian option which some of my other colleagues have and he is fine about it so I will look forward to more veggie-filled trays from tomorrow.
I would have asked for more protein... Vegie based will still be very carb dense (probably more so!) not just vegetables
Hmm... he's Chinese with bad English so it was just easier for me to ask him for the same as what he gives the other foreign teachers. Being China, everything is doused in oil which is probably holding me back a bit too!
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It's really tempting to use weight loss as an outlet when other things are out of control.
You look great; I recommend setting fitness goals rather than weight goals. Master new strokes or try to beat your lap records.
As others have pointed out, using clothing size as a metric when 99% of the people for whom those clothes are made have a totally different body type than you is unfair to yourself. Square peg, meet round hole--you know?
Enjoy your adventure! What a neat opportunity you've found! Don't spend it navel-gazing!1 -
Well here's a sample of the vegetarian option - it's definitely an improvement.
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