Hi I'm Monique & a self-sabbotager

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  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 27,897 Member
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    Hi Monique,

    Awareness is the first step!

    Welcome :)
  • CynthiasChoice
    CynthiasChoice Posts: 1,047 Member
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    I'm curious how you came to that conclusion. Is it enough of a revelation to make a difference? I mean, don't you need to know why in order to stop? I'm curious.
  • moniquemtzquiros
    moniquemtzquiros Posts: 8 Member
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    Looking over my data, I haven't been anywhere close to my goal weight since January 2016. In March 2016 I slowly began creeping up to & have maintained my weight between 220-230 for over a year.  I am a weight saboteur (finally spelled correctly) & this is unacceptable.

    My mood flucuates with my weight & vice-versa. I have dx's of Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Major Depressive Disorder so my tracking on this app allows me to follow the progression or regression of my mental health.

    I've spent lots of money on myself from conservative efforts like a gym & a trainer to extreme efforts like liposuction. Thus, it is very disheartening to know I've still allowed myself to sabbotage my own efforts.

    I feel I should know better because I am 3 semesters away from a terminal degree in behavioral health...
  • Seffell
    Seffell Posts: 2,222 Member
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    Looking over my data, I haven't been anywhere close to my goal weight since January 2016. In March 2016 I slowly began creeping up to & have maintained my weight between 220-230 for over a year.  I am a weight saboteur (finally spelled correctly) & this is unacceptable.

    My mood flucuates with my weight & vice-versa. I have dx's of Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Major Depressive Disorder so my tracking on this app allows me to follow the progression or regression of my mental health.

    I've spent lots of money on myself from conservative efforts like a gym & a trainer to extreme efforts like liposuction. Thus, it is very disheartening to know I've still allowed myself to sabbotage my own efforts.

    I feel I should know better because I am 3 semesters away from a terminal degree in behavioral health...

    Have you tried the thing that is actually important - eating at a deficit? It is free.
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
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    What happens when you reach your goal?

    For everyone, it is saboteur.
  • vivelajackie
    vivelajackie Posts: 321 Member
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    I spent about a year of self sabotage honestly, and it was hard. I'd get back to doing what I knew worked (100lbs down, so I'd had good habits prior), and then hiccup. I have seen 300 on the scale a few times after the "I'm never going back to that again"s. It takes some dedication to yourself and your goals to reel that crap back in. Not lipo. Not a personal trainer.

    Accountability in yourself is all you have in the end. I've got some pretty bad anxiety myself and moods? Yep. Turn it around and do great things. Luckily, accountability is free! Just trying at times. Good luck!
  • lorrpb
    lorrpb Posts: 11,464 Member
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    Awareness is good, but negative labels are not. You will live up to the labels you give yourself. I encourage you to come up with some positive labels that and light with your goals!
  • moniquemtzquiros
    moniquemtzquiros Posts: 8 Member
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    Thank you both.
  • moniquemtzquiros
    moniquemtzquiros Posts: 8 Member
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    jgnatca wrote: »
    What happens when you reach your goal?

    For everyone, it is saboteur.

    My only goal is to get to below 200.

  • moniquemtzquiros
    moniquemtzquiros Posts: 8 Member
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    gebeziseva wrote: »
    Looking over my data, I haven't been anywhere close to my goal weight since January 2016. In March 2016 I slowly began creeping up to & have maintained my weight between 220-230 for over a year.  I am a weight saboteur (finally spelled correctly) & this is unacceptable.

    My mood flucuates with my weight & vice-versa. I have dx's of Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Major Depressive Disorder so my tracking on this app allows me to follow the progression or regression of my mental health.

    I've spent lots of money on myself from conservative efforts like a gym & a trainer to extreme efforts like liposuction. Thus, it is very disheartening to know I've still allowed myself to sabbotage my own efforts.

    I feel I should know better because I am 3 semesters away from a terminal degree in behavioral health...

    Have you tried the thing that is actually important - eating at a deficit? It is free.

    Yes, I did that before & I lost 65 pounds. Of those 65 pounds I've gained 30 back. I weigh more now than I did 3 years ago when I delivered my last child. I wanted to rejoin MyFitnessPal and be faithful to it because I need to be accountable and I know everyone on here will help me do that.
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
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    Well, since you are halfway to self awareness, finish the thought. Are there any negative consequences to reaching your goal?

    There always are.

    Facing those consequences will move your internal guerrilla war in to a direct confrontation....with yourself.

    Excess weight has some advantages. It is a shield between yourself and...
  • paigele
    paigele Posts: 123 Member
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    Instead of focusing on the 30 regained, try looking at the 35 you kept off, and count it as a small victory toward the end goal of long life and excellent health.
    I am more motivated by the small steps I make along my journey than I ever was dreaming about what an ideal would look like. When I think about what I think I want to look like, I put myself down and see only self disappointment.
    The truth is that when we reach a goal, if there is not a change in perspective, it can make us feel just as empty as wishing on stars, because we find ourselves looking in the distance with nothing to focus on. I am continually trying to focus on edifying others-personal friends, coworkers, etc, because the encouragement gets me through slump times.
    This community has a lot to offer, even though we are strangers to one another.
    Welcome back to the family of "still trying."
  • JeromeBarry1
    JeromeBarry1 Posts: 10,182 Member
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    jgnatca wrote: »
    What happens when you reach your goal?

    For everyone, it is saboteur.

    My only goal is to get to below 200.

    Why such an easy goal? At a typical woman's height you'd be still obese at 199.

  • cnbbnc
    cnbbnc Posts: 1,267 Member
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    jgnatca wrote: »
    What happens when you reach your goal?

    For everyone, it is saboteur.

    My only goal is to get to below 200.

    Why such an easy goal? At a typical woman's height you'd be still obese at 199.

    Did you really just say that?

  • JaydedMiss
    JaydedMiss Posts: 4,286 Member
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    jgnatca wrote: »
    What happens when you reach your goal?

    For everyone, it is saboteur.

    My only goal is to get to below 200.

    Why such an easy goal? At a typical woman's height you'd be still obese at 199.

    seriously?
  • SusanMFindlay
    SusanMFindlay Posts: 1,804 Member
    edited May 2017
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    jgnatca wrote: »
    What happens when you reach your goal?

    For everyone, it is saboteur.

    My only goal is to get to below 200.

    Why such an easy goal? At a typical woman's height you'd be still obese at 199.

    Because some people will get more motivation from meeting a preliminary goal then setting a new goal than from setting a more distant goal?

    Saying "I will lose 10 pounds", doing it, saying it again, doing it again, etc. for a total of 50 pounds gives the exact same result as saying "I will lose 50 pounds" and then doing it. But some people find the first way easier. (And, certainly, some find the second way easier.)

    Why not assume the OP knows her own personality and what will be more motivating to her?
  • kommodevaran
    kommodevaran Posts: 17,890 Member
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    As a behavioral scientist, you know that you can change your behavior but not your weight, right? But that your weight is a function of your behavior? Aim to maintain good eating habits. But before you can do that, investigate what eating habits will be good for you.

    Do any of these stories ring true to you?
    http://www.sparkpeople.com/resource/motivation_articles.asp?id=1969&utm_source=sparkpeople&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=best-of-sparkpeople&utm_content=F2
  • Orphia
    Orphia Posts: 7,097 Member
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    You've maintained your weight for over a year!!! That's awesome!

    Sticking to your calorie limit is the whole idea.

    Just make sure you set your weekly weight loss goal to be sustainable, and you can get to a healthy weight in as long as it takes.
  • beanfacekilla
    beanfacekilla Posts: 69 Member
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    jgnatca wrote: »
    What happens when you reach your goal?

    For everyone, it is saboteur.

    You beat me to it!