So, uh... why do strangers keep telling me "good job" while running?
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I don't say "good job" because I don't want them to take it wrong, but when I feel like saying it is when I'm passing someone on my bicycle who appears to be struggling to climb a hill. It's kind of a feeling of wanting to encourage them to keep working at it.Geocitiesuser wrote: »TavistockToad wrote: »
So the trick then, is to run fast enough that they don't have time to say it?
@MichSmish not quite mayberry but the area I live in does tend to be relatively friendly as a whole. When I first moved to the area over a decade ago I thought it was really strange how random people on the street would say hello. You don't get that treatment in big cities, but apparently it's common in small town 'merica.
I live in Fort Worth which in size is far from "small town", but people are still fairly friendly out on the trails and streets. But then, Fort Worth prides itself on being "were the West begins" based on a poem that kind of sounds like small town America. It has been described as the biggest small town in America. So, it could be a regional thing, but I really doubt it. Athletes are just generally friendly. Why wouldn't we be? What we are doing is the highlight of our day.4 -
People are just being nice! It doesn't mean you look goofy or anything, they are just being encouraging and kind.4
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Kinda sad when a friendly greeting, a wave, a voice of encouragement gets scrutinized as being something that's "off". Relser said it: "People are just being nice! It doesn't mean you look goofy or anything, they are just being encouraging and kind."
I usually go with the wave and a "how ya doing?" People riding motorcycles used to wave at each other as they passed. Do they still? Kindred spirits recognizing each other in a friendly way.8 -
Geocitiesuser wrote: »Mostly it's a wave or head nod, a "HI" or good morning. I often times have wanted to say "good job" or similar to a person I see is struggling or appears newer to running, but I never know if that comes off supportive or patronizing.
So far it feels patronizing, especially when much more overweight peope say it to me. Just giving my honest thought.
I'd make the observation that people seeing you don't have any clue where you are as a runner. Are you on interval eight of W1D1 C25K, or are you 10 miles in to a long run? Who knows.
The same applies to people you see. I marshalled on a trail marathon a couple of years ago where one of the finishers weighed about 18 stone.0 -
Mostly it's a wave or head nod, a "HI" or good morning. I often times have wanted to say "good job" or similar to a person I see is struggling or appears newer to running, but I never know if that comes off supportive or patronizing.
Thanks for thinking about this. I'm a fat lady who runs. I used to be a thin lady who ran, then I got sick and gained weight, but I kept running because I love it and can't not. When I got fat, people started good-jobbing me, whereas when I was thin, I'd just get the runner head nod. I find the smiles and hellos fine, but the "good jobs" are patronizing. I'm just outside trying to keep active and maintain my hobby, just like everyone else on the trail. I don't need a cheerleader.11 -
Pondee629 wrote: People riding motorcycles used to wave at each other as they passed. Do they still? Kindred spirits recognizing each other in a friendly way.[/quote] We still do this when passing in opposite directions! Just acknowledging another rider, sort of a "good day" sort of thing.
I am actually surprised at how many commenters feel that they are being patronized or that these comments come from "weirdos". In my opinion this is just people being friendly and encouraging. How many times have you gotten a "Good Job", WTG, or some other comment on your news feed? I've run for a good number of years, at differing paces, in many different places and have received waves, nods, and comments just about everywhere. Unless it's nasty cat calling from a true A--hole, which has almost never happened to me, its all good in my book!!!
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Runners are a really encouraging bunch. So they may not know if you're out for a long run or not but cheering on a fellow runner great.3
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If you keep at this running thing long enough you will find that those strangers will become friends. Runners are part of a club that welcomes everyone. It doesn't matter how fast your are or how you look when you run. All that matters is that you are out there. At some point you will start to understand things that only other runners understand. Then you will get it.
Good luck.
BTW - This sort of thing happens in the cycling community as well. I would imagine it happens in other sports too.7 -
I would think of it as friendly, it doesn't bother me too much TBH. I just don't get being annoyed by it, too much energy on negativity (in my opinion, but I am super laid back as a person and it is very hard to annoy me lol but for some people it is different). I just put my headphones on and smile and nod if they do something to acknowledge me- they could be saying horrible things about me and I just don't hear it, and I would likely still just smile and nod because whatever they said is drowned out by my music/podcast and largely irrelevant to me
In races people say that stuff to me, and I just generally feel the running community is trying to be supportive and is well-meaning. It can be weird to those unused to that, I suppose.2 -
I remember in my 20s, when I was 20lbs heavier and my race training was always secondary to my draught beer and wings eating regiment, I ran a 10-mile race that passed in front of my house. My neighbors were out in lawn chairs cheering everyone on, including me. The next day, one of my neighbors asked me "So, did you finish?" I was like "Wow, did I look like I was struggling that badly?" Demoralizing, lol.2
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Isn't this about saying "good job"? So different from smiles, waves, hellos, or other benign or pleasant forms of friendly acknowledgment.
Good job is what the nursery school teacher says to little Johnny when he completes his finger painting.
It's what Mommy says to little Suzy when she loads the dishwasher.
It's what a physical therapist says to an 80 year old dementia patient who takes a few steps with a walker from a wheelchair.
Good job? Not for a stranger to say to a strapping, fit, 40 year old guy minding his own business while he jogs outside. For goodness sake.
All good, positive things in my book. No patronizing there. Why do we want to continue to shut ourselves out from people offering good for good? People complaining about receiving encouragement from strangers, would you really prefer being ignored? Isn't the world a cold enough place? Does it really hurt to receive the encouragement? The complement? And if it is sarcastic? So what? Did that hurt? Or do a lot of us just like to complain?
BTW, we are not ALL "a strapping, fit, 40 year old guy". Some of us are struggling and, if not need the encouragement, might just like it. I know I do.17 -
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Isn't this about saying "good job"? So different from smiles, waves, hellos, or other benign or pleasant forms of friendly acknowledgment.
Good job is what the nursery school teacher says to little Johnny when he completes his finger painting.
It's what Mommy says to little Suzy when she loads the dishwasher.
It's what a physical therapist says to an 80 year old dementia patient who takes a few steps with a walker from a wheelchair.
Good job? Not for a stranger to say to a strapping, fit, 40 year old guy minding his own business while he jogs outside. For goodness sake.
It's not meant to be patronizing like "aw good job weetle one". It's just a compliment- some people don't know what to say but want to be encouraging.
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I think it depends where you are and when. I run on a trail in an urban area. If it's really early morning and mostly empty, people tend to say "good morning" or "good job" to me (I'm usually so in the zone I don't notice them until they say it). Later when the trail is more crowded it doesn't happen, nor does it ever happen if I run on the sidewalks no matter the time. I also find this if I go out to a wooded trail, it's pretty common to aknowledge everyone you are passing. I personally enjoy it! Especially this morning when I wasn't feeling too great and really joyful woman said "good morning!" with a huge smile.0
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NorthCascades wrote: »
Where I live a lot of people do this!!5 -
Isn't this about saying "good job"? So different from smiles, waves, hellos, or other benign or pleasant forms of friendly acknowledgment.
Good job is what the nursery school teacher says to little Johnny when he completes his finger painting.
It's what Mommy says to little Suzy when she loads the dishwasher.
It's what a physical therapist says to an 80 year old dementia patient who takes a few steps with a walker from a wheelchair.
Good job? Not for a stranger to say to a strapping, fit, 40 year old guy minding his own business while he jogs outside. For goodness sake.
I totally agree. A "hello" or "good morning" or friendly wave is totally appropriate from a stranger. This weird random "encouragement" just seems odd. We are adults and this does come off as childish.2 -
SuzySunshine99 wrote: »Isn't this about saying "good job"? So different from smiles, waves, hellos, or other benign or pleasant forms of friendly acknowledgment.
Good job is what the nursery school teacher says to little Johnny when he completes his finger painting.
It's what Mommy says to little Suzy when she loads the dishwasher.
It's what a physical therapist says to an 80 year old dementia patient who takes a few steps with a walker from a wheelchair.
Good job? Not for a stranger to say to a strapping, fit, 40 year old guy minding his own business while he jogs outside. For goodness sake.
I totally agree. A "hello" or "good morning" or friendly wave is totally appropriate from a stranger. This weird random "encouragement" just seems odd. We are adults and this does come off as childish.
It's just what runners do... 20 years half a dozen states, it's always the same...5 -
This is common among runners/bikers, hikers, etc.
Are we really at such a state that we question greetings and attaboys?
Just take the frickin' compliment.19 -
This is common among runners/bikers, hikers, etc.
Are we really at such a state that we question greetings and attaboys?
Just take the frickin' compliment.
Greetings are great! I always greet a fellow runner/hiker/biker.
The issue I have is with the attaboys...I don't seek validation from strangers and it just feels a little odd and disingenuous to me.2 -
This is running in a small town anywhere, in my experience. I get so used to talking to people when I run that it seems very odd when I am running elsewhere. If you want to be totally ignored, run in Paris! People will not even make eye contact! I think I prefer the chat.1
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