i think there's something wrong with me

hcam8
hcam8 Posts: 69
edited September 30 in Motivation and Support
Last night at 3.15am I made myself a (EURRRGH ewww) packet-mix chocolate cake, and ate a huge chunk of it before throwing the rest in the bin...
I felt disgusting
I still feel disgusting today

I'm homesick and tired and I want to see somebody I know loves me

In the past I used to BATTLE with these moments by myself, but ive been with myfitnesspal for 30 days now. This is my first hiccup. And I finally feel like there are other people out there with me...alone together

HELP!?

Replies

  • morganadk2_deleted
    morganadk2_deleted Posts: 1,696 Member
    ok, first forgive your self, breath, its done its in the past, today is a new day! we have done something like that.

    i can't see your diary are ou eating enough, drinking plenty of water ? We are all here for you.:smile:

    Are you eating to enough?

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/10589-for-those-confused-or-questioning-eating-your-exercise-calo

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/61706-guide-to-calorie-deficit


    This is just a part of it! please read the link above


    Generally someone with a BMI over 32 can do a 1000 calorie a day (2 lbs a week) deficit
    With a BMI of 30 to 32 a deficit of 750 calories is generally correct (about 1.5 lbs a week)
    With a BMI of 28 to 30 a deficit of 500 calories is about right (about 1 lb a week)
    With a BMI of 26 to 28 a deficit of about 300 calories is perfect (about 1/2 lb a week)
    and below 26... well this is where we get fuzzy. See now you're no longer talking about being overweight, so while it's still ok to have a small deficit, you really should shift your focus more towards muscle tone, and reducing fat. This means is EXTRA important to eat your exercise calories as your body needs to KNOW it's ok to burn fat stores, and the only way it will know is if you keep giving it the calories it needs to not enter the famine response (starvation mode)


    Also this might be helpful http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/00trayn/view/how-to-bust-a-3-month-plateau-87677

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/153704-myth-or-fact-simple-math-3500-calories-one-pound-eat



    Good luck on your journey
  • nicxox
    nicxox Posts: 175 Member
    Well yes it was a slight hiccup but try to concentrate on the positive - you threw some of it away! That just shows how far you must have come and how strong-willed you must be! Keep at it you're doing great! =)
  • JujiBean
    JujiBean Posts: 187
    Well, the good news is that you didn't devour the whole cake.

    But how did eating the cake (or maybe throwing the cake away) show you that somebody loves you? Was someone there with you who made you throw away the cake? Sorry to be dense....just trying to understand.

    Binge eating is a tough problem....but one you CAN overcome.

    Good luck to you.
  • NyxDominique
    NyxDominique Posts: 271 Member
    *hugs tightly*

    Try to get some fresh air, or some blood pumping by doing something fun in your house like dancing.

    Channel that negative energy into postive energy.

    I did the same thing this week. My ferret died and I binged at about 3000 calories in comfort food. I felt like crap. Then I got out of the house and walked around the museum of science and like magic the depression slowly went away.

    I am a easily depressed person and know the loneliness and emptiness you are feeling. Looking at your phone wondering who you can call and hoping that they pick up the phone. Except normally when I go meet people it is to eat more food. Don't make that mistake.

    Again channel that energy into something productive, even if it is hard to do.
  • HotMamaByVday
    HotMamaByVday Posts: 343 Member
    Wow. You really wanted that cake. I would have gone to the store in my PJ's and flip flops.

    you are and will be ok. We all slip up, the important thing is that you are back again this morning. Keep at it!
  • morganadk2_deleted
    morganadk2_deleted Posts: 1,696 Member
    Hungry girl advise

    Important rules. Here they are...
    1. Don't drink your calories. There's nothing sadder than realizing you just consumed hundreds of calories by sipping a sweet drink... and you're still hungry! For the most part, I look for drinks with no more than 50 calories per cup, and I always check the labels carefully for the total servings per bottle.
    2. The 80/20 rule. I live by it. It means that 80 percent of the time, I eat what I know I should be eating. And 20 percent of the time, I allow myself to stray a bit. It's important to indulge every once in a while... like, maybe, 20 percent of the time!
    3. Don't turn a bad meal into a bad week. So you made a poor food choice. You're human. Don't give up and throw in the towel just because you overate. Jump right back into things at your next meal. No biggie. Truly.
    4. Identify and avoid your trigger foods. These are the foods you can't be trusted around -- the ones where "just a few" turns into WAY too much; the foods that seem to make you hungrier and hungrier. Don't keep these foods in the house. They're too tempting and not worth the trouble...
    5. Don't make excuses -- it's all about being prepared. The Boy Scouts know what they're talking about! If you know you're going out to dinner, check out the menu online so you can plan ahead and make smart choices. And always keep emergency snacks handy -- in your purse, car, desk drawer... wherever you might need them. Then you won't need to make excuses.
  • Emily4H
    Emily4H Posts: 170
    First things first - forgive yourself. Blips happen and this is a crossroad. You can view it as a blip and turn that behavior and thought process around today - or you can beat yourself up more and more than likely stuggle again today.

    Its tough to be away from your support base. Call the people who love you just to say hi if you can. Its important that you feel connected to your people. It does make the wntire thing harder - but not impossible,

    The good news is you only had a hunk, and not the entire cake...... Look at small victoies.

    Try to think why you were eating at 3 am. Were you hungry? if you were not hungry then finding anothe 3 am activity would be helpful. If you are stressed, maybe work out? If you are sad, maybe get on FB or somthing and write friends messages to re-focus. (I am not professional - these are just ideas)

    This is hard - and we will not win our battle every day. Its not what you do with the victories that teaches you the most, its what you do with the defeats.

    Good luck today - I will be thinking positive things for you.
  • Kelly_Wilson1990
    Kelly_Wilson1990 Posts: 3,245 Member
    Going around feeling guilty will only make you eat more! Forgive yourself. We are all human and make mistakes. Today is a a new day and a new beginning just start over. There are people on here 24 hours a day. Maybe next time get on here and talk about it before you bake and eat something you will regret! You CAN do this!!!
  • venusmasontheus
    venusmasontheus Posts: 4 Member
    Hang in there. Start from where you are and like Morgan said, forgive yourself. You CAN do this! Be patient with yourself and like that commercial for smokers says...never quit quitting so never stopping getting healthy and fit. We're ALL in this together.
  • lejess
    lejess Posts: 63
    Well yes it was a slight hiccup but try to concentrate on the positive - you threw some of it away! That just shows how far you must have come and how strong-willed you must be! Keep at it you're doing great! =)
    Exactly!! So you slipped up, the point is that you realized you werent making a smart decision and then you made one by throwing the rest of it out. Dont beat yourself up for a mistake. Recognize the progress you just made!!
    You said you have been on MFP for about 30 days now....I bet 31 days ago you would have eaten that whole cake, am I right? Thats change in behavior my friend. You took a step backward,realized it, and took a step forward.
    We all do it, and this wont be the last the time. The point is that you see it for it was, correct yourself, and move on.
    Dont beat yourself up today, trust me, chocolate cake is not worth all that energy.
    Its a new day, start again.
  • jstrohs1
    jstrohs1 Posts: 66
    We all have our bumps in the road and this is normal....remember you threw the rest of the cake away!!
    Hang in their ......today will be much better!! :)
  • lejess
    lejess Posts: 63
    Hungry girl advise

    Important rules. Here they are...
    1. Don't drink your calories. There's nothing sadder than realizing you just consumed hundreds of calories by sipping a sweet drink... and you're still hungry! For the most part, I look for drinks with no more than 50 calories per cup, and I always check the labels carefully for the total servings per bottle.
    2. The 80/20 rule. I live by it. It means that 80 percent of the time, I eat what I know I should be eating. And 20 percent of the time, I allow myself to stray a bit. It's important to indulge every once in a while... like, maybe, 20 percent of the time!
    3. Don't turn a bad meal into a bad week. So you made a poor food choice. You're human. Don't give up and throw in the towel just because you overate. Jump right back into things at your next meal. No biggie. Truly.
    4. Identify and avoid your trigger foods. These are the foods you can't be trusted around -- the ones where "just a few" turns into WAY too much; the foods that seem to make you hungrier and hungrier. Don't keep these foods in the house. They're too tempting and not worth the trouble...
    5. Don't make excuses -- it's all about being prepared. The Boy Scouts know what they're talking about! If you know you're going out to dinner, check out the menu online so you can plan ahead and make smart choices. And always keep emergency snacks handy -- in your purse, car, desk drawer... wherever you might need them. Then you won't need to make excuses.

    Brilliant advice!
  • missy_1975
    missy_1975 Posts: 244 Member
    Hungry girl advise

    Important rules. Here they are...
    1. Don't drink your calories. There's nothing sadder than realizing you just consumed hundreds of calories by sipping a sweet drink... and you're still hungry! For the most part, I look for drinks with no more than 50 calories per cup, and I always check the labels carefully for the total servings per bottle.
    2. The 80/20 rule. I live by it. It means that 80 percent of the time, I eat what I know I should be eating. And 20 percent of the time, I allow myself to stray a bit. It's important to indulge every once in a while... like, maybe, 20 percent of the time!
    3. Don't turn a bad meal into a bad week. So you made a poor food choice. You're human. Don't give up and throw in the towel just because you overate. Jump right back into things at your next meal. No biggie. Truly.
    4. Identify and avoid your trigger foods. These are the foods you can't be trusted around -- the ones where "just a few" turns into WAY too much; the foods that seem to make you hungrier and hungrier. Don't keep these foods in the house. They're too tempting and not worth the trouble...
    5. Don't make excuses -- it's all about being prepared. The Boy Scouts know what they're talking about! If you know you're going out to dinner, check out the menu online so you can plan ahead and make smart choices. And always keep emergency snacks handy -- in your purse, car, desk drawer... wherever you might need them. Then you won't need to make excuses.

    Fab reply, I second all of it! I think many of us have or are emotional eaters. It can be really difficult to stop once we get started on a comfort eat binge, but you did! I use exercise as a way to reduce stress, improve my self esteem and it helps if I've had food that I rather wish I didn't or hadn't planned to.

    The 80/20 advice is great too, if we have an all or nothing mindset (one I'm particularly susceptible to) we are setting ourselves up to fail when we enevitably aren't "perfect".

    Good luck and friend me if you would like more support from someone who very much understands.
  • ivansmomma
    ivansmomma Posts: 500
    I think of every morning as a starting over day, whether I hiccuped or not. It is the beginning of another day of my life, I cannot go back and change the past, but work towards the future. Take care.
  • ppiinnkkmmoonn
    ppiinnkkmmoonn Posts: 418
    if your always from home maybe you can find a OA meeting near you and visit it free and a way to vent and talk to others who get it hugs
  • mlh612
    mlh612 Posts: 311 Member
    It was a slip, but not an every day occurrence...So forgive yourself and start out today with a new outlook! :flowerforyou: Next time you feel that way, pump up the music/dance around/do anything to get your mind off of it... If you can still not get rid of the craving, eat a small piece of dark chocolate... Best of Luck!
  • hcam8
    hcam8 Posts: 69
    The problem is i still feel rotten in my digestive tract today, and i was up until like 4am so now im feeling a bit sick (eat to make it go away) and massively tired (looking for a sugar hit) and feeling guilty (might as well throw it all away now)...

    Today is a new day, sure, but the consequences of yesterday are making it about as grey and rainy as it is outside
  • hcam8
    hcam8 Posts: 69
    But thank you for all of your kind remarks,
    honestly it means a lot

    and ive actually thought about doing the things you say...dancing! sounds like me
  • sgoldman328
    sgoldman328 Posts: 379 Member
    Forgive yourself -- we all slip up. No body's perfect. Christ, I had two lunches the other day. Haha, but that's besides the point. What matters is you're moving forward. Frankly, the surge of calories might be a bump to your metabolism -- something to throw you off kilter, and will result in more weightloss for this week! Who knows?!?!

    You're a superhero -- forgive yourself, and move forward. We all believe in you!
  • superhippiechik
    superhippiechik Posts: 1,044 Member
    :smooched: Boy do I know where you are coming from. I have done that, and the equivelant of, many times. I have an ED and I will always be a binge eater no matter how thin I get. Sweetie,accept yourself and all of your flaws because I truly believe the weight loss journey is mental as well as physical. Yesterday is gone. You are NOT disgusting,you are a beautiful Work of Art in Progress and when you are done and can look back at the process you will see that it was all necessary. You can and will do this!
  • gods_gal
    gods_gal Posts: 301
    You may be feeling rotten because of the amount of sugar in the cake. I know I always feel horrible the day after I eat something with sugar. I'm trying to get that out of my system. I would try to drink a lot of water today and exercise if you can. I hope you feel better soon. It's a new day! Have a great one!! <<hugs>>
  • AdAstra47
    AdAstra47 Posts: 823 Member
    Don't beat yourself up! I beat myself up and went on a guilt-trip every time I fell off my diet for years, which just makes the depression worse...

    Everyone is different, but I'll tell you what worked for me. My doctor discovered that my body doesn't process sugars or carbs well, and every time I ate some, my body would experience a brief period of energy followed by a massive crash. My doctor explained that when your metabolism is crashing, it makes you feel very hungry and crave sweets, and it also affects your brain chemistry. The chemicals that affect your mood are altered, and you actually have physical changes happening in your body that make it more difficult for you to make smart choices and resist temptations.

    I had been overweight for years, and had battled depression & mood swings for years, and I had never connected those things. But it turns out that ALL of my problems were just symptoms of not knowing the right way to eat.

    A few months ago, my doctor tested my metabolism and recommended that I cut out sugar and carbs as much as possible, and start eating something with protein in it every three hours while I'm awake. Those two strategies keep my metabolism going at a steady rate all the time: no more spikes & crashes. It's been hard, it takes a lot of planning ahead to have the right kinds of food on hand at all times. I've had to set alarms on my phone 'cause I'm really not hungry that often. But if I wait 'til I *am* hungry, I screw up & eat anything in sight. Sounds like that may be the case with you, too: at 3 a.m. you wouldn't have eaten in at least 6 or 7 hours, right? Maybe your body's metabolism was just crashing hard & taking you along for the ride.

    In the four months since I began this, I have not experienced any mood swings or depression and I've lost 30 lb. It has worked wonders. So, if you think this may be your problem as well, try eating something little & healthy every three hours, heavy on the protein & light on the carbs, and see whether your mood swings stop swinging.
    Best of luck to you!
  • Amysgetnfit
    Amysgetnfit Posts: 231
    Been there.done that ... didnt get thethe tshirt.except I ate the whole thing til I threw up. You were smart enough to throw it away.
    you are going to slip from time to time.ITS OK! MOVE FORWARD!
    Love the hungry girl advice.that's so true. Take comfort that you are not the only one. & as long as you get back on track your belly will feel better in a day or two. Try some probiotics may help balance your digestive system out &you your belly will feel better. I've found that when I binge its often when my system is out of whack and the sugar makes it worse
    Keep at it.you can do it!
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