Extremely frustrated, but here I am

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SherylKrug
SherylKrug Posts: 2 Member
in Introduce Yourself
I'm a 50 year old female, post menopause, 5'10", 268 lbs.

I've spent the last 20 years slowly but surely packing on the pounds. I am single and find it very difficult to care about caring for myself. Depression has been a constant companion my whole life.

Anywho... thanks to some personal revelations and epiphanies, on June 21 I decided to give a *kitten* again.

Started cardio daily (stationary recumbent bike) and worked from 20 minutes to 40. Started weight program 4 weeks ago.

Haven't had a Mt Dew Throwback in over six weeks (used to have 3-6 20 oz bottles a day), eating reasonable carbs, ample protein, fruit and vegetable fiber. Drinking plenty of water.

First couple of weeks went well. Then I not only hit a plateau, I started gaining.

My blood pressure was also exceptionally low for me (92/64). Doc removed one BP medication and that seems to have resolved itself.

At a BP follow up last week, I weighed and had gained. I had myself a mini breakdown and my doctor wanted to see me today.

She a) prescribed me a short term med to address my insomnia; b) upped my Prozac dosage; c) wants blood work to check my thyroid; d) recommended eating every 4 hours; and e) reviewed my old school food diary and suggested this app.

I'm already rolling my eyes - I finished out yesterday and it gave me some totally unrealistic 5 week estimate results.

I don't need one more person or program to tell me what could happen, because it never seems to happen that way for me.

Blood work will be completed Thursday morning with results no later than Monday. Maybe there will be some answers there.

Yes, there is a pity party going on. Yes, I'm pouting, Yes, I'm stressed beyond belief.

But I haven't stopped. I haven't gone off the fitness/nutrition wagon. But if something doesn't start happening that can be seen or tracked, I'm going to be a wreck.

So, I'm here. I'm sure I'm not alone, but it sure feels lonely.

Replies

  • My4happykids
    My4happykids Posts: 124 Member
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    You are doing great. Do your best, that is all you can ask of yourself. If you don't like the projection that MFP gives you, you can either not finish your diary (not push that button) or not look. It's there to try to motivate and make you feel good about what you are doing.
    Turmeric tea has really helped me with mood problems I've been depressed for years but refused meds.
    You can add me as friend if you like. You can do this.
  • Old_Cat_Lady
    Old_Cat_Lady Posts: 1,193 Member
    edited August 2017
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    I tried paper logging. This is completely, totally different. Many anti-depressants cause weight gain. Exercise for health, but to lose weight, log, log, log. I take a centrum for women over 50. When I forget to take it, I start feeling run down. I don't know what vitamin I'm missing, but this helps me.
    Melatonin 3mg helps me sleep. I often take magnesium 250 for a deeper sleep. Both from walmart. I have also found that a glass of milk helps me sleep sounder (not sure if the potassium, magnesium, or calcium).
  • amber0o
    amber0o Posts: 11 Member
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    You're doing great and one of the hardest things possible, staying motivated while fighting depression. Keep at it, every day counts. I'd nothing else you're forming new health habits. The weight loss will catch up.
  • tdaniels54
    tdaniels54 Posts: 55 Member
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    Don't get discouraged. Persistence is what it takes. I'm very stubborn. I'm trying to get down to a weight I have not been able to maintain in the past. I've lost over 70 lbs. Tracking is the key. Battling depression is tough. Hang in there! Good luck!

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