I lost as much as I weigh!

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her4g63
her4g63 Posts: 284 Member
edited August 2017 in Success Stories
It finally happened. While this is just water weight fluctuations and not actual, it was still pretty damn surreal to see. I've "lost" as much as I weigh. I don't anticipate it being the same tomorrow but still y'all, all day I've been like, "holy bananas, that's super weird"

A few years ago I was a girl who felt defeated and broken. I was a girl who was miserable with the reflection in the mirror and low self esteem. A girl who heard words that cut so deep that the scar still remains. A few years ago, I was a girl who never would have been able to imagine coming this far or seeing this number on the scale ever again. I was a girl who was plagued by self-doubt and self-loathing.

While this journey has been about far more than just a number on a scale, it's been a fairly significant part of the story. From holding on to the belief that the relationship with gravity was of the utmost importance for self-love, acceptance, and happiness to receiving a healthy dose of reality when none of that happened the first time I reached this number. Now it's been, keep your body healthy and strong, even when sometimes it feels like it is wanting to fail you. Still, looking into the mirror is difficult. There are days many tears are shed but there are also days I see all the hard work that's been put into making it what it is.

It's a lifelong commitment to really craft this vessel into something I'm proud of and I'm excited for the opportunity. It's strange looking into the mirror and seeing no differences but doing a side-by-side comparison and being like, whoa. My only goals are: to be as strong as I can, to help my body through a really *kitten* time and do my best to counter the negative effects, to look into a mirror and get filled with happiness because I made this body into what it is, and basically to see the look on my husband's face that everyone dreams of seeing... the one where you just feel good because they can't stop looking and smiling because they're just like....damn.

There will always be the remnants on my skin of where I've been on this journey. The stretch marks that are free flowing all over my belly and legs. The little look of sadness sometimes I'll get when looking into the mirror. The skin that was once tight no longer being as such. And sometimes I'd give anything to change them but other times, I see them and think, man, what a wild couple of years.

And it for sure has been a wild ride.

Editing to add: I have ZERO photos of my highest weight. I took no progress photos because I've constantly been unsatisfied and filled with an unimaginable amount of self-hate. These aren't my highest, but they give some perspective. And the "recent" shots, the black and white one was from a year and two days ago but I look relatively similar with clothes on (though, without, big difference) - the other two were from today.

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Replies

  • l1bbylabel7
    l1bbylabel7 Posts: 64 Member
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    You are AMAZING!! Great job
  • vlnielsen519
    vlnielsen519 Posts: 75 Member
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    You look great! You are an inspiration to so many that are on the journey.
  • cbeutler
    cbeutler Posts: 667 Member
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    Great work, and well done.
  • her4g63
    her4g63 Posts: 284 Member
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    Thank you all so much!! (:
  • Penthesilea514
    Penthesilea514 Posts: 1,189 Member
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    Fantastic work! Congratulations :)
  • bigjonb4116
    bigjonb4116 Posts: 153 Member
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    well done you look Fab. :)
  • gg2007
    gg2007 Posts: 71 Member
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    Congrats hun!!! what an achievement!!! You have done friggin awesome!!!
  • ISweat4This
    ISweat4This Posts: 653 Member
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    Wow, you look amazing
  • cmbarbato71
    cmbarbato71 Posts: 31 Member
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    Simply amazing and truly inspiring. Congratulations!
  • goaliema
    goaliema Posts: 150 Member
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    Wow..congrats.you look AMAZING! .Your hard work definitely has paid off. Thank you for sharing your journey with us. It's inspiring stories like your's that give others inspiration to start..or push thru a plateau..or continue reaching their goal. I don.t like my picture taken. However.. I am getting in the pictures for memories..but also..progress pics...to remind me of my journey and accomplishments along the way. 42lbs gone..at least another 35- 40 to go.

    Would you share with us..what type of workouts you did? Especially for the tummy area?
    Thank you...
  • her4g63
    her4g63 Posts: 284 Member
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    goaliema wrote: »
    Wow..congrats.you look AMAZING! .Your hard work definitely has paid off. Thank you for sharing your journey with us. It's inspiring stories like your's that give others inspiration to start..or push thru a plateau..or continue reaching their goal. I don.t like my picture taken. However.. I am getting in the pictures for memories..but also..progress pics...to remind me of my journey and accomplishments along the way. 42lbs gone..at least another 35- 40 to go.

    Would you share with us..what type of workouts you did? Especially for the tummy area?
    Thank you...

    Thanks, @goaliema ! Here's my original story I posted on MFP and then the blog post MFP did on it.

    I regret not taking any progress photos but if there was one thing I have been consistently filled with, it was disgust at what I saw looking back at me. I couldn't push myself to just take them because, to be completely honest, I didn't want to be any more dissatisfied with what I would've seen. Looking back, I wish I would've just taken the darn photos. It was hard to see any progress when there was never anything to compare it to... I think that's why I relied so heavily on the scale.

    Keep up your journey - you've come so far already! Very proud of and happy for you!

    Up until I hit about 140-ish pounds, I didn't do anything other than park really far away and take the stairs everywhere to get some extra steps in. It was all my diet. Recently, I've gotten in to lifting and cardio. Here's a general overview of my schedule:
    Run 2-3 miles MWF (closer to 3 but sometimes I'm just tired and do 2), run up and down 6 flights of stairs continuously for 20 minutes TTh (it averages about 84 flights in total), and do my strength training M-Th.
    Monday: Legs (squats, deadlift, lunges)
    Tuesday: Pushing (bench press - incline and flat, military press, dips, pushups)
    Wednesday: Pulling (pull-ups, bent-over row, curls)
    Thursday: Legs (squats, deadlift, lunges)

    I currently do 30 Carbs/ 35 Fat/ 35 Protein

    Hope that helps! (:
  • chasitystiff7057
    chasitystiff7057 Posts: 5 Member
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    So did you do a low carb diet you look great
  • her4g63
    her4g63 Posts: 284 Member
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    @chasitystiff7057 - I don't know if I'd say I did "low carb" necessarily; the percentage is lower than my fat and protein but I use those three as minimums, really. I definitely didn't try to avoid carbs by any stretch 'cause they make me too happy (:
    I just ate less than I burned, basically!
    And thank you! (:
  • renrawz1997
    renrawz1997 Posts: 13 Member
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    Great work. I've kept a good bit of weight off also.
  • Imomw2016
    Imomw2016 Posts: 93 Member
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    Congratulations and thank you for the motivation and inspiration to keep going! Good things happen to those that are willing to put the work in to it and you're certainly proof of that!
  • JeromeBarry1
    JeromeBarry1 Posts: 10,182 Member
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    Your husband is a very very fortunate man.
  • 87jessielim
    87jessielim Posts: 9 Member
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    Wow you look great! Do you track every meal? How do you keep motivated when you slipped (or never?) I could really get some tips as I have about 8kg to lose and I desperately want to lose it in 2-3 months but I'm such a food-lover at the same time :(
  • debisjazz
    debisjazz Posts: 115 Member
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    You look amazing. Even more importantly, it sounds like you've has some major changes in your self-confidence and self-esteem. Good for you!! You are an inspiration.
  • christinedlg50
    christinedlg50 Posts: 138 Member
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    Amazing! Thank you for sharing! It helps those of us on the same journey so much! Share some insights with us too when you can. What worked for you? What strategies did you employ to stay motivated? What words of wisdom and encouragement can you share? It would be so helpful! Bravo! You look gorgeous!
  • her4g63
    her4g63 Posts: 284 Member
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    Your husband is a very very fortunate man.

    Thank you (: Buuuut maybe, considering he is honest to goodness one of the nicest humans on this planet, I consider myself a tad more fortunate. Hoping he doesn’t catch on though (;

    Wow you look great! Do you track every meal? How do you keep motivated when you slipped (or never?) I could really get some tips as I have about 8kg to lose and I desperately want to lose it in 2-3 months but I'm such a food-lover at the same time :(

    Thank you! I do track every meal. Even after all these years, I still weigh everything because I’ve found that “eyeballing” is not something I am good at. I’m a super foodie and my entire day is spent looking forward to the next meal (100% accurate) but I pre-log everything a week in advance so I don’t ever have to think about it and can really put time into being creative for the days ahead. I’ve slipped quite a bit – especially in the beginning where I wasn’t taking progress photos and had serious difficulty seeing any progress. I’ve just always reminded myself that a little slip-up can be corrected if I really want it bad enough. I’ve overcome the barrier of thinking about it as a “diet” and instead it’s just become part of my lifestyle, who I am now. There will always be set-backs on this journey, always days where we over-eat and try to tank ourselves with bad thoughts but it’s the ability to get back up and keep trying. The best advice I have is to just take it slow. Don’t rush anything because you want a “hot summer bod” or because you just want to “feel better about yourself.” I failed a ton in the beginning trying to do that but when I started just taking it slow, it seemed way less painful. Weightloss is a journey, enjoy every second of it and be proud of your accomplishments (and especially the little ones). And TAKE PHOTOS. My goodness, if I could go back…

    debisjazz wrote: »
    You look amazing. Even more importantly, it sounds like you've has some major changes in your self-confidence and self-esteem. Good for you!! You are an inspiration.

    Thank you!! Out of everything, that was the biggest struggle. I had to really dig deep to understand and accept that my value is not dependent on my relationship with gravity. (:

    Amazing! Thank you for sharing! It helps those of us on the same journey so much! Share some insights with us too when you can. What worked for you? What strategies did you employ to stay motivated? What words of wisdom and encouragement can you share? It would be so helpful! Bravo! You look gorgeous!

    Thank YOU for reading! What worked for me was honestly just taking it slow, weighing what I put into my mouth with a food scale, accurately and honestly logging, and using positive reinforcement. There were days all my mirrors were covered with post-its with things like “You can do this!” and “YOU are creating this body!” and “The mirror is not an accurate depiction of how far you’ve come and what you can do!” I didn’t cut anything out of my diet, I just ate less of it. I parked further away from the stores, I used the stairs everywhere I could. In the beginning, I didn’t incorporate any exercise, it was just diet alone. Since, I’ve decided I want to be strong because being a badass sounds pretty fun. Some days were hard to keep going, some days were easier. Take photos, compare them but not too regularly so that you can see actual differences. Just enjoy the journey and know that you can, and are, doing it! The less I thought about it as "restricting" or "dieting," the easier it became. I kept telling myself that I was creating my life because I am the author and this body is where all the stories get written and told... so I wanted it to be a good one. (:

    Here are some hopefully helpful things that go into it a little more:
    Blog post MFP did on my story: http://blog.myfitnesspal.com/lost-weight-self-esteem-complicated/

    My post in the success story section: http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10499472/120lbs-lost/p1

    Cheers!
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