Can't get motivated anymore

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xInclementiax
xInclementiax Posts: 2 Member
in Motivation and Support
I'm really trying to find the will and motivation to not give up but it's very hard. I've started trying to lose weight last year, I ended losing 15 pounds but eventually gained back plus some. It's hard to want to do it again because you realize all the work you put in is gone and you have to start over. I really feel like I'll be this way the rest of my life and it's the worst feeling ever. Is anyone else in this situation?

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  • joseccastaneda
    joseccastaneda Posts: 267 Member
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    What did you do last year to lose 15 pounds. If its a crash diet, that's no doubt the reason why. MFP and the community is to help you reach your weight goal by making life changes and increase your overall knowledge. Crash dieting is not sustainable and will result in a person gaining back their original weight plus a few more pounds.
  • smc92079
    smc92079 Posts: 219 Member
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    Why did you stop? Were you doing something that wasn't sustainable for you? If you really want to lose weight, you have to set your mind to it and don't give up. There are challenges and hurdles along the way, sure. You have to figure out what works best for you and find things that you can keep up with in the long term. If you have a bad day, you just focus again the next day. It really does come down to making a choice though, as the previous poster said. If you choose to do it, you can do it.

    BTW - this is a long process. You can't give up because you aren't where you want to be in a few weeks. It takes time and dedication.
  • MileHigh4Wheeler
    MileHigh4Wheeler Posts: 67 Member
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    I went through that a few times before I woke up and got serious. I would lose 10 and gain 10 or 15, then lose 10 and gain 10 or 15. I always tried to stay around 185, I ended up at 230 and and FINALLY at 185 again but a healthy 185. I got serious and started weighing what I ate, cut out the stupid stuff I ate and, most importantly to me - I stopped having "cheat days". I read, and have come to agree, that "cheat days" do more to undo your progress than anything else, so now I'll indulge a bit but then I hit the gym and work it off. Another big game changer for me was my Apple Watch, it keeps me hyper aware of everything I'm doing all day and with MFP keeping me hyper aware of what I'm consuming and my Worthings scale making me hyper aware of when I'm gaining or losing - it all motivates me to keep on track. You can do this, you just have to WANT it and WORK for it :wink:
  • xInclementiax
    xInclementiax Posts: 2 Member
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    I didnt crash diet I was eating what I wanted but healthier alternatives plus Zumba. I think the number one reason I stopped was because the results were not as fast as I thought(3 months). I know I should've celebrated any kind of results I had but for some reason it just discouraged me, the reality of how long it actually takes. Absolutely right about the cheat days, those won't work for me! I just gotta get serious no matter how long it takes. Way easier said than done though.
  • Sunna_W
    Sunna_W Posts: 744 Member
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    Have you thought about just moderating your intake and eating less carbs / sugar?

    The reason I ask is because once you get over the hump of craving sugar / carbs, it's not too bad.

    I gradually eliminated sugar and carbs over several weeks and it really helped me a lot. Note: you need some carbs so that you don't get constipated and you feed the good bacteria in your gut. Read up on resistant starch and try to hover around 100 carbs a day if you can.

    For breakfast I have 2 HB eggs and a small boiled potato. I make these both in advance for the week and pack them the night before.

    For lunch I have a mixed salad (sauted mushrooms, chopped carrots, celery, olives, jicama, artichoke hearts, parsley that I also make in advance with a tiny bit of olive oil and vinegar) with 3 to 4 oz lean meat, like chicken or turkey that I add when I pack it for the next day.

    For dinner, I cook normally (I saute, pressure cook, or broil most things) but make less pasta or rice or bread and add more veggies.

    Also, I try to focus on the day ahead of me and do the best that I can. If I don't meet my goal (or in this case, exceed my goal) I just move on to the next day and start again.

    Some days I do better than other days. Work and home stress and the amount of sleep I get (or don't get) all affect how hungry I am and whether or not I am able to deal with being hungry.

    I have found though that if I keep a lid on my sugar and carbs I seem to do better.
  • Kullerva
    Kullerva Posts: 1,114 Member
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    "Motivation" is becoming my trigger word, so I'm just gonna leave this here:

    Motivation is not a thing. Willpower is *not* a thing. Gah, these are *not real things*, but everyone thinks they are and it drives me nuts.

    A while back when I was struggling to break a stress overeating habit (bordering on BED), I looked into the psychology of decision-making. I simply couldn't understand why I would continue to overeat when I'd made a strict, inflexible decision that I wouldn't do that. I'm a pretty disciplined person, so it made zero sense that this would happen--yet it would, over and over and over again.

    It turns out there are two factors at work here. First, the brain is constantly making decisions. We're processing information even as we sleep. Though the research is in its infancy, most psychologists agree that we make the decision to do something a long time before we "pull the trigger" on whatever that decision is. It may feel like we make decisions in the moment, but that's simply not the case.

    To take my overeating as an example: I would overeat because, throughout the day, I would be exposed to a great deal of stress, and I became habitually accustomed to work out those stressful feelings by eating food instead of doing something else. I had followed this pattern so often that it had become a habit--part of my daily life.

    Which brings us to the second factor: habits. Habits are damn near impossible to break. Ask any smoker. You can't really get rid of a habit, but you can replace it with another one. When I realized what was happening, I set out to shift my overeating habit to something else.

    Habits have three pieces: a "trigger" (something that kicks off a behavioral routine), a behavior (the habit) and a reward. For me, those pieces corresponded to:

    (1) Trigger: Stress
    (2) Behavior: Emotional overeating
    (3) Reward: Satiation/fullness/comfort

    Over the course of several weeks (yes, it takes a while--sorry), my habit became:

    (1) Trigger: Stress
    (2) Behavior: Play game or read book
    (3) Reward: Fun/distraction/comfort

    Putting a label on the worst emotions that caused overeating allowed me to appropriately set my new rewards. I slipped up plenty of times...but I've gone several months without even wanting to binge, so it's effective.

    OP, if you're focused on the work, you're not focusing on making it easy. Habits, once formed, are nearly effortless: they do the work for you. It comes down to making clear decisions and understanding why you're making the choices that you do. Good luck.
  • lorrpb
    lorrpb Posts: 11,464 Member
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    It does take a long time. Weight management is something you'll have to do the rest of your life, not 3 months and bam you're done. The sooner you can come to grips with this, the more success you'll see! Make decisions you live with long term.

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