Will Always Feel Like "The Fat Girl"

You might want to consider counseling to help you with your self-esteem issues. Or you might want to have on hand some affirmations to repeat to yourself when these thoughts creep in.

I absolutely know how you feel. It's like lowkey body dysmorphic disorder, where you can only see yourself in a certain way with fatal flaws. When I see pictures of myself I sometimes don't recognize who it is, because when I look in the mirror I always see that same fat girl I was in high school.

I have to remind myself when I interact with people now (especially strangers), that they don't see a fat girl. It is totally a weird feeling. I don't see myself as fat any more, although I definitely identify as slightly overweight (because I am). If you feel you are struggling to see yourself as the weight you are, some counseling might help, too. There's a lot of feelings wrapped up in being fat.

I felt that way for a long, long, long time, even after losing 35 pounds.
It can take a while for your brain to catch up with your body.

I totally understand how you feel. I'm from Asia and most Asian girls are so skinny and underweight. I'm in the normal BMI range but I always feel and told by others that I'm fat simply because I look larger in size in comparison with other Asian girls.

It's always good to just do a before and after picture every now and then. I recently had a baby and I feel so huge and flabby. I am flabby lol. But i forget how far I've come. I'm still wearing a size I haven't been in since 8th/9th grade. I get so down but when I do I take a picture of myself and compare it to where I started. I think we get so use to seeing ourselves at our current weight that we forget how far we've come.

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I know exactly how you feel, I still have difficulty believing how much weight I have lost, and don't always recognise myself in the mirror. However, it seems that the self perception is simply lagging behind, as I am getting used to it. So, it is likely that those feeling will fade as you get used to your new shape. Well done on the weight loss!

I’m right there with you. I’ve lost a lot of weight in the last year or so (120+ lbs) but more often than not I feel like I’m still the same person I was before I started all of this. I always perceive myself as the largest person in the room, regardless of whether that’s true or not. Sometimes it is, I still have another 50 pounds or so to lose, but definitely not all the time. I still assume I can’t do things because of my size when that’s not true anymore. I still assume that no one wants to talk to me except out of pity. He saddest part about that last one is that I had very little evidence to support it when I was heavier - it’s almost entirely fed by my own insecurities and self doubts.

Pictures have been helping me lately. I have a photo album on my phone with pictures of myself over the last year. When I look at them back to back, the difference is impossible to ignore. As the person going through it, it’s so easy to get too close to it. You see your self every day so the change is too gradual for your brain to register. I’m also trying to focus more on the things my body can do now that it certainly couldn’t do before. None of this is foolproof and I definitely still have days where my brain is stuck in my old body but it helps anyway.

You're not the only one. Counseling may be necessary if it causes you significant distress.
If it's something you've been able to bear until now, it's possible to beat it by focusing your attention on other things. "The fat girl" is an identity, and it generally is pulled up to the surface in social situations in which your looks or body are liable to become a topic, be it because people use superficialities as a proxy to guide their interactions, be it because they're sad, sad people.
Second group deserves to be ignored. First group deserves other focus points. Things you can do. (Including things your body can do!) Things you like. Things they can do. Things they like. If these identities are strengthened, those related to looks or things you can't just immediately change about yourself, they will still be there, but hopefully lose a big part of their importance. Because there's so much more to you than 'the fat girl' or 'the girl who used to be fat'.