The WORST Motivation...

laillama
laillama Posts: 17 Member
in Motivation and Support
I have the absolute worst drive to work out. I have all of these goals- I even set up things I would do for myself if I reached them. I have all the time in the world to work out, and I have my program all set aside to do so. I literally just cannot get off my *kitten* and go to the gym. I don't know why. Maybe it has to do with how late I want to go, maybe I just don't have motivated people pushing me to go, I don't know, but I don't know what tf to do anymore. I've tried setting alarms, tried compensations, vocalized my intent to go... I just don't.
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Replies

  • skymningen
    skymningen Posts: 532 Member
    If you already suspect it has to do with the timing, try changing the timing for a start.
  • shannonwaters2395
    shannonwaters2395 Posts: 44 Member
    :( me neither. But I celebrate small wins and any win actually motivates me. I had a small win with weight loss from simple and moderate calorie reduction, which has propelled me to complete a few 5 minute exercise vids from youtube!! I the queen of small steps. Do you have any wins or NSV to help you feel like a conquerer?
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,556 Member
    Pick something you do like to do.

    Here's a list of sports:
    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_sports
  • b_fanger
    b_fanger Posts: 6 Member
    Don't beat yourself up, think that you are lazy or lack motivation. Like Mr. Healthy said much is about momentum. Too, much depends on doing a workout that fits. I have lost nearly 100 lbs or more; not sure exactly how much because I would not even look at a scale until after I had lost 2 inches off my waist. Everything started slowly first just tracking calories then starting a short walk moving up the power walks of over an hour. One silly little trick I found helped was taking a pair of dice and assigning actions to the result of a toss. If I rolled a 2 or 12 I forbid myself from working out if any other number it became a command to do so, Interestingly after rolling the dice and getting the "no workout" I do not feel a relief but rather an annoyance of not being allowed to workout. if on the other hand I rolled number commanding me to workout I did so because after all it was a command. Dumb I know but it has worked well in keeping me on the track,
  • sofchak
    sofchak Posts: 862 Member
    Is there an opportunity to workout from home? When I first started on this journey, I couldn’t muster up the determination to go to a gym - even one I paid good money for that was right down the street! Never worked out a day in my life, so I had no base to start from to build motivation.

    So, I changed my plan and found 5 minute workouts I could do at home. No excuse to not do a 5 minute workout! Who doesn’t have 5 minutes to spare?

    From there, as others have said, the momentum hit and I had started a habit. 5 minutes turned into 10, which turned into other activities to see what I liked best to do for fitness, which turned into my completing my first 50k trail run 1.5 years later. Funny how that momentum stuff works...

    Good luck - start with 5 minutes. You got this.
  • 88olds
    88olds Posts: 4,529 Member
    edited October 2017
    Try this exercise.

    Piece of paper, line down the middle. Left side, why you want to go. Right side, why you don't.

    Give it some thought. It may take a couple of days to get at the don'ts but make an honest list. Even if some of your answers sound dumb or trite initially.

    Now look at the don't want to side. Don't criticize yourself for resisting the gym. You have your reasons and on some level they are real to you.

    Are there compromises or deals you can make with yourself to work around your resistance?
    You can't just beat yourself into submission. Your attempts at bribery haven't worked, at least not yet.

    Good thread BTW. Agree that habit, once established, will take you far but habits need to be established and defended. Also, I think there's a tendency to start too hard and ramp up too fast. No one will stick with a torture regime. Fortunately, exercise has a sort of addictive aspect once you get going.
  • laillama
    laillama Posts: 17 Member
    shannonwaters2395 wrote: »
    :( me neither. But I celebrate small wins and any win actually motivates me. I had a small win with weight loss from simple and moderate calorie reduction, which has propelled me to complete a few 5 minute exercise vids from youtube!! I the queen of small steps. Do you have any wins or NSV to help you feel like a conquerer?

    My small wins would be adding weight to my reps, which yknow you can't really do if you don't go to the gym! And that's great I'm so happy for your progress! :)
  • laillama
    laillama Posts: 17 Member
    bronaghCPM wrote: »
    The only way I can get myself to go to the gym is if I put my gearbag in the car the night before and drive straight there from work, as fast as possible and don't allow myself time to think of excuses not to go. I also keep my workouts really short and try to get showered and back out the door within 90 minutes.
    You've probably built it up in your head to be this huge step requiring a chunk out of your day and loads of effort, if you can prove to yourself that you can easily integrate working out into your life you can probably get into the habit of going more often.
    The other thing you could do is book a fitness class and pre-pay for it, that way you're less likely to cancel.

    That's very smart. Yeah, I'm going into a local gym that my friend works at today to get a job there, but woke up 2 hours before doing that (just woke up) intentionally so I could go to my gym first. I know I don't really have an excuse not to now.
  • laillama
    laillama Posts: 17 Member
    Machka9 wrote: »
    Pick something you do like to do.

    Here's a list of sports:
    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_sports

    I already compete in a sport, I'm just trying to get the motivation to do off-season training and powerlift. I don't get into season until March so it isn't very organized as it is, plus I live very far from my campus so I am almost solely on my own right now with training.
  • laillama
    laillama Posts: 17 Member
    Mr_Healthy_Habits wrote: »
    After losing 180lbs and keeping it off for the last few years, I can tell you that, it's not about goals or motivation, or rewards... It's not that you are lazy, or tired, or lack the time, or lack some sweet spot...

    It's simply about momentum...
    It's not some character flaw, or external circumstance... It's purely a matter of momentum...

    And momentum happens gradually, slowly, overtime, not suddenly all at once... And the only way to build momentum, is to get up and go... Your not changing your life and heading full steam ahead in one moment, the first time you get up and go...

    You're simply gathering, creating, building momentum... Before you know it, your body will practically get up and go to the gym all by itself, without a thought... Like mine does

    No pressure, no big change... Just slowly building momentum

    Next time, don't say... I have to get up and go to the gym... Try saying... I have to build some momentum!

    Wow congrats on the progress! That's a very great way to look at it, thank you! Gonna write that down ❤❤
  • laillama
    laillama Posts: 17 Member
    sofchak wrote: »
    Is there an opportunity to workout from home? When I first started on this journey, I couldn’t muster up the determination to go to a gym - even one I paid good money for that was right down the street! Never worked out a day in my life, so I had no base to start from to build motivation.

    So, I changed my plan and found 5 minute workouts I could do at home. No excuse to not do a 5 minute workout! Who doesn’t have 5 minutes to spare?

    From there, as others have said, the momentum hit and I had started a habit. 5 minutes turned into 10, which turned into other activities to see what I liked best to do for fitness, which turned into my completing my first 50k trail run 1.5 years later. Funny how that momentum stuff works...

    Good luck - start with 5 minutes. You got this.

    Yeah, I have a lot of opportunities and programs I can do at home, which I do sometimes. But the problem is I want to get into heavy lifting more plus I only live a 3 minute drive from my gym which is 24 hours...
  • laillama
    laillama Posts: 17 Member
    88olds wrote: »
    Try this exercise.

    Piece of paper, line down the middle. Left side, why you want to go. Right side, why you don't.

    Give it some thought. It may take a couple of days to get at the don'ts but make an honest list. Even if some of your answers sound dumb or trite initially.

    Now look at the don't want to side. Don't criticize yourself for resisting the gym. You have your reasons and on some level they are real to you.

    Are there compromises or deals you can make with yourself to work around your resistance?
    You can't just beat yourself into submission. Your attempts at bribery haven't worked, at least not yet.

    Good thread BTW. Agree that habit, once established, will take you far but habits need to be established and defended. Also, I think there's a tendency to start too hard and ramp up too fast. No one will stick with a torture regime. Fortunately, exercise has a sort of addictive aspect once you get going.

    Thats a good idea!! I agree, I never regret a gym sesh. I always feel great mentally and physically and after I go for about 2-3 days in a week I just want to go more.
  • ejyennie
    ejyennie Posts: 16 Member
    see if you can get a buddy to go with you. I have a run buddy and a bike buddy, between them, I get out four days a week.(no one wants to swim with me because I am so slow!)
  • laillama
    laillama Posts: 17 Member
    ejyennie wrote: »
    see if you can get a buddy to go with you. I have a run buddy and a bike buddy, between them, I get out four days a week.(no one wants to swim with me because I am so slow!)

    Definitely! I have close friends I would workout with but they're not motivated either!! I try to get my bf to go to the gym with me and he just won't
  • azulvioleta6
    azulvioleta6 Posts: 4,195 Member
    Forget about motivation and work on forming a habit. Physically GET YOURSELF THERE. Make showing up every day your goal and go from there.

    I agree that finding things that you enjoy doing can help...but realistically, especially in the winter, most of us need to go to the gym to maintain a high level of fitness. Do you have other physical goals that are supported by going to the gym? For example, I wanted to be able to return to doing Latin social dance, and going to the gym got me to the fitness point where I could do that again.

    What about taking a class (at the gym or somewhere else) that involves exercise? Sometimes having a specific time that you must be somewhere is helpful. Looking forward to meeting up with classmates can be motivating too.

    Depending on other people to get you there is just a cop out--take responsibility for yourself and just make it happen.
  • skiers266
    skiers266 Posts: 20 Member
    I know where u are I feel same way !! Set clock to get dress set clock for workout but still sitting here. I know I am the only one that can do this so let get dress get your water and let’s get moving today If I can do it you can too !!! Hope I hear back that you got workout done it the first step that the hardest!!!
  • Alpha12
    Alpha12 Posts: 251 Member
    Find some space for yourself at home and work out there! You won't have to "make yourself" drive to the gym and you'll save a lot of time by doing that. There are tons of free workouts on youtube and you're sure to find something that will fit your goals.
  • dutchandkiwi
    dutchandkiwi Posts: 1,389 Member
    So you are your worst enemy- What would you do if it was an enemy? Alll it often is is fear of failure and well that means by not starting you are not failing (when in fact you are)

    Or alternatively what would you tell another person.
    Last year I was giving some career advice to a co-worker and halfway I stopped and looked at her and said " I think I should start listening to my own advice" I did and did that course that I wanted to to do for 2 years but was scared sh*tless to fail. Guess what? I did not fail, I passed, but I had to start first.
  • skiers266
    skiers266 Posts: 20 Member
    Easy to give advice .. but sound u on right track you can do this !!!
  • LearningToFly13
    LearningToFly13 Posts: 329 Member
    Don't go to the gym then? Do something else. Walk, run, dance...workout at home ? It's up to you how you workout.
  • skiers266
    skiers266 Posts: 20 Member
    True don’t need to go to gym or equipment can march in place !!!
  • laillama
    laillama Posts: 17 Member
    skiers266 wrote: »
    I know where u are I feel same way !! Set clock to get dress set clock for workout but still sitting here. I know I am the only one that can do this so let get dress get your water and let’s get moving today If I can do it you can too !!! Hope I hear back that you got workout done it the first step that the hardest!!!

    Definitely! I got up at 8 am yesterday and headed straight to the gym :) doing the same tonight after classes for sure.
  • laillama
    laillama Posts: 17 Member
    Like.. Yes I don't need equipment. Many days I make do at home. But I am a powerlifter. My goals are to LIFT heavy and be stronger not just general fitness. While I can do things easily at home, I cannot reach my own personal goals and follow my training plan if I am not at a gym or have access to equipment.
  • Sunnybrooke99
    Sunnybrooke99 Posts: 369 Member
    I’m the same way. I have to go first thing in the morning, or I won’t do it.
  • LearningToFly13
    LearningToFly13 Posts: 329 Member
    Sunnybrooke99 wrote: »
    I’m the same way. I have to go first thing in the morning, or I won’t do it.

    Yeah I have to get literally everything done in the morning. The longer the day goes on, the less I can be bothered.

    If your goals are so important to you OP then looks like you're just gonna have to get up and go. Don't think about it or wait for some wave of motivation. Just do it. Things become habit the more we do them... motivation isn't reliable so don't bank on it being there for you every day ❤

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