Looking for friends/motivation

Hi all,
I'm in need of some serious motivation and support also. I've been back and forth with this app for 2 years, I've tried slimming world twice and God knows how many other diets.
I used to work 50 hour weeks on my feet all day, happy and healthy. We fell pregnant, was made redundant and then abandoned to be a single parent. During my pregnancy I suffered a loss, I was alone and gave into my cravings resulting in a 5 stone weight gain!! (I know, crazy!)
I lost 4 stone in the first year of the birth of my son (now 3) but since I've been in a new relationship I've gained a stone back!
I actually eat really well, I don't snack on treats but I'm sure my portion sizes at dinner time are excessive. The thing is, I don't really eat breakfast or lunch, I would probably have a piece of fruit but then I'm wolfing down dinner in the evening!
I also don't move as much as I used to... I sent myself back to university since being made redundant so sat at home in front of a computer most of the time.
I must also point out that I have suffered from anxiety since I was 4 months pregnant only recently getting to grips with it this past year as I have an extremely supportive partner whos helped me. Id love to be more active and i really do have the best intentions, but I might take a fitness class one week and never return because I'd have such an irrational panic that I can't control! I feel I'm letting my son down, myself and my partner.
This is extremely long winded so I'm sorry to go on, just looking for anyone in a similar position. I want to take back my life from this anxiety, be everything my family needs me to be and 'regain my confidence. I believe loosing the weight will help me do this...
So about me:
Age: 29
Current weight: 154 lbs
Goal weight: 126 lbs

(Again sorry for rambling and thank you for reading, if you made it this far haha!)

Sucks doing triple duty...i can relate...trying to incorporate more activities during my days in order to be more successful and happy with myself

I'm new to this app, (I don't know how to add friends). Joined a few years ago but didn't use it. Joined 2 months ago but haven't really used it. I'm ready to start. So I'm not sure how friends work but I would love support and to be supportive! I've read through the posts here and I identify with you all. Not the same injuries and medical set backs. But I've definitely had set backs.

36 years old
Homeschool Mother of 3: 15,13,11
Start weight 236 (Aug 19th)
Currently 216
Goal, fit and healthy, whatever that is
I think my goal weight is 150, (what I weighed before having my children) but I haven't seen that number on the scale for 16 years!