Do I or don't I?

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So heres the situation, since january I have dropped from 15 stone 4lbs to 9 stone 10.2lbs. I am very nearly at goal weight i think (I keep changing my mind!) Goal weight will be around 9 stone 5ish, give or take a few pounds for fluctuations.

So one of my other half and I best friends is back from travelling and we havent seen him for a while. He wants to go out for a meal on Friday night to catch up etc.... Part of me is saying 'Go Kirsty, have fun, eat! Youi've done very well to get this far, its a lifestyle not a restrictive diet, if you put weight on, so be it, you can lose it the next week etc

HOWEVER, another part of me is thinking i wont go, or ill go and not eat anything much.

in reality i dont want to be missing out on these social situations but I guess im getting worried about seeing the scale go up as my weigh in is on Sunday. i know, being sensible, that if i have put weight on by weigh in it will not be fat because i wont have consumed an extra 3500 calories but it doesnt make it much easier!

I guess im just needing reassurance/guidance on what to do. I Do want to go and I DO want to eat things that i wouldnt normally eat in a week as it is a once off but i dont want the guilt!

Help me please!!

P.S. They have also bought out new sundaes so i really would like to try one (shared with the boyfriend) but arrggghhhhh. i dont want to miss out on these things in the long run because this is a new lifestyle and i dont want to ban myself from these treats.

Sorry for the rant, just had to get it off my chest!

Replies

  • jenkamac
    jenkamac Posts: 61 Member
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    Go!!! It's not realistic to think that just because you are trying to lose weight / trying to maintain weight that you cannot go out and be social and enjoy yourself. If you restrict yourself too much you will end up rebelling eventually and putting it all back on. Live your life. Eat more than you should every once in a while - it's okay!! OR, go and try to make the healthiest choices possible - maybe it will be a good test for you. BUT GO!!!
  • maab_connor
    maab_connor Posts: 3,927 Member
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    do they have an online menu? i'm finding that if i know beforehand what i want and what the calories are, i can avoid temptation, but still see my friends.

    it's a tightrope, that's for sure. b/c if you restrict your life with your food, then you're going to rebel. i say go, but be sensable. check the menu beforehand, order water or seltzer, don't think "i'm out, i can go crazy" but don't stay home an hide from calories either.

    that's my best shot.
  • AggieCass09
    AggieCass09 Posts: 1,867 Member
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    everything in moderation and get in a work out that day...you'll be fine. If you can plan ahead that would be best. And remember with each bite you chew, am i hungry? will this bite taste any different than the last?

    you can have fun with friends, just make smart choices!
  • cardbucfan
    cardbucfan Posts: 10,426 Member
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    Go!!! It's not realistic to think that just because you are trying to lose weight / trying to maintain weight that you cannot go out and be social and enjoy yourself. If you restrict yourself too much you will end up rebelling eventually and putting it all back on. Live your life. Eat more than you should every once in a while - it's okay!! OR, go and try to make the healthiest choices possible - maybe it will be a good test for you. BUT GO!!!

    Agree 100% with this mindset. Go and enjoy seeing your friend and eating that sundae.
  • janiecorona
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    Go but eat smart! Have a salad or something. Stay away from filler foods, like free bread rolls. And if you still feel bad, exercise more that day to make up for it and just have smaller meals that day too. I still go out to eat but I try to pick the healthiest places and have portion control when I'm there. One meal isn't going to make a big difference, just don't go overboard. (:
  • Egger29
    Egger29 Posts: 14,741 Member
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    Go out and Enjoy yourself! A great way to incorporate a Lifestyle change without worrying about every single meal is to follow the 90% rule. I've posted the details below for your reference!

    Day Two - The 90% Rule
    By Dr. John M. Berardi, PhD, CSCS

    You may have cringed at some of the nutrition rules I outlined yesterday. (Don’t worry, I’m not offended.) But here’s a bit of a break. 10% of the time, you can eat whatever you want.

    Yes, you read that right. 100% nutritional discipline is never really needed to completely change your body. The difference between sticking to the rules 90% of the time and sticking to them 100% of the time is minor, really.

    And that extra 10% means you can feel free to eat the food you like.

    Follow the rules 90% of the time. The other 10%? Eat anything you want. I’m not kidding around here. I actively encourage people to eat any food they like, because the reality is that good food can be one of the great joys of life.

    But being overweight, unhealthy and lethargic are not. And certain foods eaten too frequently or in too large an amount will quickly make you all three of those things.

    So Precision Nutrition clients are given a simple instruction: eat any food you like, in up to 10% of your meals; in the other 90% of your meals, eat the foods that will fuel your body to success.

    That ratio will give you the body you want AND allow to enjoy the food you love.

    But make sure you do the math.
    But here’s the catch: make sure you do the math and determine what 10% of the time really means.

    For example, if you’re eating 6 meals per day for 7 days of the week – that’s 42 meals. 10% of 42 meals is about 4 meals. Therefore you’re allowed to “break the rules” on 4 meals each week. If you skip a meal or eat something not on the plan, that counts as breaking the rules!

    Make sure your 10% doesn’t become 20% or 30%. If you’re eating 42 meals a week (6 meals per day x 7 days a week), you’re allowed to eat 4 meals or snacks per week that aren’t part of the program (10%) and that’s all.

    Don’t binge — schedule!
    A caveat: your 10% meals shouldn’t include downing an entire pizza, followed by a full box of Krispy Kreme donuts. Binge eating can rapidly destroy your progress and make you feel like crap, let’s be clear on that. A day long binge is not the equivalent of “one cheat meal.”

    Rather, your 10% meals should include some foods, in reasonable quantities, that might not normally fit into your plan.

    This might include a couple slices of pizza on a Saturday evening, a piece of cheesecake after dinner on Sunday, a beer or glass of wine after work on Wednesday, or some chocolate on Monday morning.

    And the best way to make sure you don’t go overboard is to schedule your 10% meals. Pick a day and a meal and schedule it just like you’ll be scheduling your exercise days. This will keep you committed to your eating plan as well as have you looking forward to something different. Of course, if you simply must have one of your 10% meals outside of its regularly scheduled time, go for it. Just to make sure you don’t double up, cross it off your schedule.

    Even better: learn how to incorporate the food you love into your 90% meals.
    With a little expertise and ingenuity in the kitchen, you can often turn your favorite meals into healthy options that meet the criteria for a 90% meal.

    For example, in the Gourmet Nutrition cookbooks (the first of which is included in the Precision Nutrition System), our expert chefs show you how to make delicious pizzas, snacks — even desserts, like cheesecake — all without breaking the rules of good nutrition.

    It’s often as simple as learning a few tricks. Many clients are shocked when they learn how easy it is, and are so satisfied by the plan that they deviate even less than 10% of the time. In fact, on our private member forum, the cooking discussions are often the liveliest, and for good reason: once you can make good food taste great, reaching your goal is as easy as picking up a fork and spoon.

    Summary
    You can eat anything you like — but only 10% of the time. The rest of the time, eat to fuel a healthy body. But don’t forget that with a little cooking experience, that fuel can taste better than anything you’re eating right now.
  • Kabula
    Kabula Posts: 97 Member
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    I think you should go and hang out with your friend! You have lost weight by eating healthier so you're probably more prone now to go out and eat healthier things; and treat yourself with dessert! It's better to give in a little than to not give at all. You don't want to binge! GOod luck!
  • Izable2011
    Izable2011 Posts: 755 Member
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    I think you should treat yourself but remember portion control!!! :)
  • Azzrielish
    Azzrielish Posts: 44 Member
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    I say go out and have fun!

    But here's some ideas to help you not blow it completely so you dont feel too bad:
    - exercise twice as much as you would normally that day before you go out
    - eat something healthy but filling before you go out (yeah I know it sounds crazy when you are going out to eat) - if you're super hungry when you get out you'll be more likely to make poor choices
    - look for something relatively healthy on the menu/or only eat half of your plate of food
    - plan to drink low cal booze if you can - I love vodka, soda water and fresh lime myself :)

    Good luck and have a great time.
  • angeltiaverde
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    You simply cannot limit your life for food. Weight loss is very important, especially when you are trying to reach your goal, but maybe instead of going out to dinner, you can sugget another fun activity that will allow you to burn some calories and have fun- Like bowling OR suggest a healthier restaurant. It's ok to splurge everyonce in a while, just make it count and make sure you work out the next day. Have fun!
  • pepperdine
    pepperdine Posts: 26 Member
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    Egger29-
    Thanks so much for posting that. It really makes sense and truly makes this a lifestyle change rather than a d-word. I'm going to start allowing myself a couple of planned splurge meals!
  • Egger29
    Egger29 Posts: 14,741 Member
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    You're welcome! :-)
  • Elmaunie
    Elmaunie Posts: 78 Member
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    Go go go! Have fun! If you're feeling a bit worried about it do an extra long work out and think to yourself that you're earning your evening out :)

    I bet one of your goals was to look good, so make the most of your gorgeous new figure and let your friends admire and compliment you!!
  • mapinkerton
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    You have to venture out into the "real food" world sooner or later. Hopefully you will know in advance where you are going and can look up the menu and such ahead of time. Even if you can't; you should know by now what is good for you, portion sizes, etc. Go, eat in moderation, and have a good time!

    I bet you will surprise yourself and do well. I think this because of this question.

    Good Luck!

    Mary