Is it okay to like a distant cousin?

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Replies

  • cee134
    cee134 Posts: 33,711 Member
    TheRoadDog wrote: »
    My Aunt and Uncle are first cousins. When they decided to marry, it caused a huge problem and division among family members. However, I have to say that they just celebrated their 65th anniversary together and I have never seen a happier couple.

    Well it makes it easier because they don't have to split time between families during the holidays...

    Oh, well, when you put it that way...
  • Espressocycle
    Espressocycle Posts: 2,245 Member
    The answer is yes. It's fine.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    TheRoadDog wrote: »
    My Aunt and Uncle are first cousins. When they decided to marry, it caused a huge problem and division among family members. However, I have to say that they just celebrated their 65th anniversary together and I have never seen a happier couple.

    Well it makes it easier because they don't have to split time between families during the holidays...

    Unfortunately, it split the family for about 45 years.
  • JillianRumrill
    JillianRumrill Posts: 335 Member
    edited January 2018
    rdevol wrote: »
    I used to work with someone who was dating her stepbrother...
    That reminds me of a conversation I had with an uncle of mine, he worked once in a prison helping inmates get their GED and one of them said "I just wanna go home and marry my sister" ಠ_ಠ this was in a rural part of Upstate NY.
  • toned_thugs_n_harmony
    toned_thugs_n_harmony Posts: 1,001 Member
    So I just looked it up and apparently these are the states that allow you to marry your cousin...?:

    Alabama: First cousins, yes.
    Alaska: First cousins, yes.
    Arizona: First cousins, yes, only if they are over a certain age or cannot bear children. Half cousins, yes.
    California: First cousins, yes.
    Colorado: First cousins, yes.
    Connecticut: First cousins, yes.
    District of Columbia: First cousins, yes.
    Florida: First cousins, yes.
    Georgia: First cousins, yes.
    Hawaii: First cousins, yes.
    Illinois: First cousins, yes, only if they are over a certain age or cannot bear children.
    Indiana: First cousins once removed, yes, only if they are over a certain age or cannot bear children.
    Kansas: Half cousins, yes.
    Louisiana: Marriage between first cousins is not allowed.
    Maine: First cousins, yes, only if they are over a certain age or cannot bear children, or if they get genetic counseling.
    Maryland: First cousins, yes.
    Massachusetts: First cousins, yes.
    Minnesota: No, unless the aboriginal culture of the couple permits cousin marriages.
    Mississippi: Adopted cousins, yes.
    Montana: Half cousins, yes.
    Nebraska: Half cousins, yes.
    Nevada: Half cousins, yes.
    New Jersey: First cousins, yes.
    New Mexico: First cousins, yes.
    New York: First cousins, yes.
    North Carolina: First cousins, yes. Double first cousins are not allowed to get married.
    Oklahoma: Half cousins, yes.
    Oregon: Adopted cousins, yes.
    Rhode Island: First cousins, yes.
    South Carolina: First cousins, yes.
    Tennessee: First cousins, yes.
    Utah: First cousins, yes, only if they are over a certain age or cannot bear children.
    Vermont: First cousins, yes.
    Virginia: First cousins, yes.
    West Virginia: Adopted cousins, yes.
    Wisconsin: First cousins once removed, yes, only if they are over a certain age or cannot bear children.

    Minnesota and Louisiana are the only two to basically just say no? Wow.
  • chubby_checkers
    chubby_checkers Posts: 2,352 Member
    edited January 2018
    So I just looked it up and apparently these are the states that allow you to marry your cousin...?:

    I'm disgusted with my state now. Not that I wasn't already...fricken taxes.

    Eta. Wtf if a double first cousin??

    Double first cousins are when two siblings of one family have babies with two siblings of another family. Their offspring are related to each other through both of their parents.
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  • Merkavar
    Merkavar Posts: 3,082 Member
    happimess1 wrote: »
    whether distant or clingy, he/she is still family. You have to like them or atleast act like you do.


    But how some people were on here saying if it ain't a grandma, uncle, cousin, or aunt, they might as well just be called a friend? I wonder what they have to say about this.

    So I think my comment about any one outside of grandparent, uncle, cousin, aunt, nephew, niece is essentially a friend/not related is backed up by other peoples posts here.

    Looks like legally most states allow even first cousins to marry. But if first cousins are illegal mariages, they tend to make no mention of second cousins. Hence my comment about anyone outside of cousins, ie 2nd or 3rd cousins are essentially friends or unrelated people.

    Your asking about 2nd and 3rd cousins, so legally your all ok, right?

    Morally that’s more up to you. Same for religiously,.

    All marriages have the possibility of family drama, so dating a 2nd cousin or 3rd could to, but that’s just a risk you have to take. Like in some states dating someone from a different race/religion could cause drama.

    I guess just make sure the 3rd cousin is tallish so it is worth the drama.
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  • poetic_cell
    poetic_cell Posts: 772 Member
    I am so embarrassed that I actually even opened this thread :lol: but it was funny if anything

    tumblr_nq5kj8dGoR1tsfx8ro1_400.gif
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  • BusyRaeNOTBusty
    BusyRaeNOTBusty Posts: 7,166 Member
    My husband is my 4th cousin twice removed. I met him at a bar.
  • beagletracks
    beagletracks Posts: 6,034 Member
    lstrat115 wrote: »
    bojack3 wrote: »
    Like at least 2nd or 3rd? That’s not strange? I don’t like someone but I know someone that wants to know. Sister is very different than a distant cousin.

    So I'm lucky enough to have a hacker friend that can get IP addresses....had to look up yours....what country or state is, Mom's basement in?

    Mount Horeb, Wisconsin

    :D
  • CharlotteX167
    CharlotteX167 Posts: 5 Member
    Like at least 2nd or 3rd? That’s not strange? I don’t like someone but I know someone that wants to know. Sister is very different than a distant cousin.

    Some people marry their first cousin
  • beagletracks
    beagletracks Posts: 6,034 Member
    lstrat115 wrote: »
    lstrat115 wrote: »
    bojack3 wrote: »
    Like at least 2nd or 3rd? That’s not strange? I don’t like someone but I know someone that wants to know. Sister is very different than a distant cousin.

    So I'm lucky enough to have a hacker friend that can get IP addresses....had to look up yours....what country or state is, Mom's basement in?

    Mount Horeb, Wisconsin

    :D

    ;) I was hoping that some day this would resonate with someone. You made my day

    I got the reference immediately! :)
  • TonyB0588
    TonyB0588 Posts: 9,520 Member
    Mandygring wrote: »
    I have cousins that married (they weren't blood related but grew up together as first cousins)....the family was very upset. It was weird when ppl try to ask which cousin you're related to...you have to say both.

    If they're not blood related, they were never actually cousins.
  • Vikka_V
    Vikka_V Posts: 9,563 Member
    Like at least 2nd or 3rd? That’s not strange? I don’t like someone but I know someone that wants to know. Sister is very different than a distant cousin.

    Ooh Taboo!!

    Can't help who you like, so it is 'ok'...but might be a big problem socially especially with the family.
  • _pi3_
    _pi3_ Posts: 2,311 Member
    Froggy babies
  • bz2018
    bz2018 Posts: 143 Member
    What did I just read..
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