Dieting in your 20s?! Why does everyone want to go out and eat!

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Hey yall! Back with another question! Im in my 20s and my friends constantly want to go out and get dinner together or hit the bar (and they all order drunk food like its the last hot wing on earth)... how do you handle going out in these situations? I usually pass on going out because of my 4am start at work almost everyday but i feel im even passing up my few opportunities to go out just because im scared of hurting my progress. Im not too much of a drinker (usually the designated driver) so maybe ill have one or 2 beers but then they all order fries and nachos and wings and im there just dying inside wanting to eat, but i cant because that plus a beer or 2 will add up! How do i go out and be social but avoid the calories. I especially avoid it because my weigh in days are Sunday so if I find myself cheating on Friday or Saturday I know the scale will slap me for when I weigh in on Sunday and see no progress. *sigh* I shall just live in a cave!

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  • jflongo
    jflongo Posts: 289 Member
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    Just order a nice salad. If they give you grief that is there issue not yours. Don't worry about going with the norm, set an example.
  • rheddmobile
    rheddmobile Posts: 6,840 Member
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    It depends a lot on where you live. Here, it's almost impossible to go out after 9 pm unless it's to a bar with what you called drunk food... good luck finding a salad there, if there is one it's mainly cheese and croutons and three pieces of romaine lettuce.

    Not saying this is easy, but you can try to steer them towards other activities. If you can find something fun to do together during the day that involves walking. Or if there's a place with dancing where people actually dance. Where I live, most people would rather eat a bug than get up and dance.
  • TeaBea
    TeaBea Posts: 14,517 Member
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    "Bank" some calories during the week to have on weekends. This may hurt your weigh-in initially, but it will even out eventually.
  • toxikon
    toxikon Posts: 2,384 Member
    edited February 2018
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    I usually go out once a week and there are two ways I handle it, depending on my mood:

    1. Preplan and fully give into my cravings for deep-fried, fatty goodness. That might mean eating 100 fewer calories 7 days leading up to the dinner, or just skipping breakfast and lunch the day of. Either way, I plan for about 2000 calories of naughty naughty food and fully enjoy it.

    2. If it's a restaurant I'm not crazy about or I don't feel like eating a lot, I'll just go and keep it light. Soup, salad or a lean protein and veggie dish. Something light without a lot of added oil or sauce. If it's a big portion, I'll box up half of it immediately to have for lunch the following day.
  • Tblackdogs
    Tblackdogs Posts: 324 Member
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    As a person who once was in her 20s I can sympathize. I have a few suggestions...first of all pick one night where you'll eat a few wings or fries and a beer or two. Plan ahead for that day by eating lightly up until you go out. Second of all, as someone else suggested, try steering the group to something active (bowling is great, dancing is great, bocce? a softball game?) or something like game night at your place. Then you have more control regarding the food and beverage consumption! Finally, it's really and truly o.k. to order something you want and drink a diet coke. I spent a lot of time in my life eating because food was in front of me or drinking to fit in and now, at my advanced age of 52, I can see how silly that was. Be yourself. Be healthy. Same rules go for not staying up too late, sleeping with people you shouldn't sleep with and letting your credit card bill get too high! It's never to early to set some good habits! I'll get off my mom soapbox now!
  • jflongo
    jflongo Posts: 289 Member
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    Agreed with Tblackdogs. I bowl every Friday night. I tend to have 3 - 4 beers during that 3 hours, so I add that to a extra snack in MFP, to figure how many other calories I should have that day.
  • amyteacake
    amyteacake Posts: 768 Member
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    You can still go out while dieting. If you're eating out at a restaurant or something then you can always look up the menu and see if there's anything there that's healthy or what you want to eat, and if everyone is drinking you don't have to drink with them if you don't want to. I'm sure no one will judge you. And you can treat yourself to some wings or nachos. I usually try and eat well during the day and then when I'm going out I have enough calories to treat myself
  • ShaeSweetness
    ShaeSweetness Posts: 61 Member
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    jflongo wrote: »
    Just order a nice salad. If they give you grief that is there issue not yours. Don't worry about going with the norm, set an example.

    Well first off, i believe salads are the devil...so i will never have one of those things! lol and second, they never give me grief or try to make me eat, its just my own self control. Eating fcking grilled chicken all week and then you see cheese fries infront of you, its so so hard for me to resist!!
  • ShaeSweetness
    ShaeSweetness Posts: 61 Member
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    It depends a lot on where you live. Here, it's almost impossible to go out after 9 pm unless it's to a bar with what you called drunk food... good luck finding a salad there, if there is one it's mainly cheese and croutons and three pieces of romaine lettuce.

    Not saying this is easy, but you can try to steer them towards other activities. If you can find something fun to do together during the day that involves walking. Or if there's a place with dancing where people actually dance. Where I live, most people would rather eat a bug than get up and dance.

    girl i dont know where you live, but i dont want to live there! Haha im from New York, city that never sleeps! So theres lots of late night options. I do love dancing but tonight in particular we are going to a pool bar and play some billiard and eat/drink...its gonna be difficult to sweat those calories away and i dont play too much pool so im gonna be tempted to just eat! haha we shall see cause i reallly try to make my cheat day sunday, didnt wanna make it tonight!
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,372 Member
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    It depends a lot on where you live. Here, it's almost impossible to go out after 9 pm unless it's to a bar with what you called drunk food... good luck finding a salad there, if there is one it's mainly cheese and croutons and three pieces of romaine lettuce.

    Not saying this is easy, but you can try to steer them towards other activities. If you can find something fun to do together during the day that involves walking. Or if there's a place with dancing where people actually dance. Where I live, most people would rather eat a bug than get up and dance.

    girl i dont know where you live, but i dont want to live there! Haha im from New York, city that never sleeps! So theres lots of late night options. I do love dancing but tonight in particular we are going to a pool bar and play some billiard and eat/drink...its gonna be difficult to sweat those calories away and i dont play too much pool so im gonna be tempted to just eat! haha we shall see cause i reallly try to make my cheat day sunday, didnt wanna make it tonight!

    Focus on what you want to eat on Sunday then, and don't waste calories tonight on things you don't really want.

    That being said, it's possible to leave room for 400 calories for a snack if you're active and make better choices during the day... if you make yourself eat grilled chicken all week, you'll never be able to stick to it long term because you will just give up...

    Find tasty, satisfying options that fit your calories and you won't feel as deprived and it will be easier to say no to things that don't fit your calories.
  • HoneyBadger302
    HoneyBadger302 Posts: 1,974 Member
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    This is a tough one for me as well - I'm not in my 20's, but dinner and drinks is still the go-to for most of my gatherings.

    First off, I'll get white wine instead of beer - I also am more likely to drink it slower, so that helps.

    Next, I'll just order one main dish that I planned into my day, and try to get steamed broccoli or something as a side instead of fries.

    I also allow myself the occasional "all out" meal, usually after a race or track weekend. I can burn plenty of calories those weekends, but it's nearly impossible to track, but I haven't found this to really hurt my progress in the past (then again, I'm okay with a very slow loss/recomp). That way I don't feel AS deprived when I'm getting the healthier option than my guy friends (which, totally not fair that they can eat so much more!!!)
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 32,166 Member
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    If you think all social interaction is eating/drinking in your 20s, wait until your friends are fat and fifty and have even less inclination to do something other than eat/drink as "entertainment". Sure, there's less social time at 50, but trust me, what there is will be even less active, on this social track. This is the time to start building better life practices (not just dieting).

    One option: More variety among your friends. Join a club or group oriented around some fun activity - sports team, dance group, martial arts club, hiking or kayaking group, cycling club, etc. Sure, those people do some social eating/drinking, too, but it isn't their total focus.

    Just a thought.

    Back at what you really asked: Does the bar have popcorn, or something like that? Not perfect, but less disruptive than other choices.
  • CattOfTheGarage
    CattOfTheGarage Posts: 2,750 Member
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    Eating fcking grilled chicken all week and then you see cheese fries infront of you, its so so hard for me to resist!!

    This may be part of your problem. Get a bit more variety and fun food into your ordinary diet and you'll be a bit less desperate when it comes to eating out.

    Also, try inviting people over for a night at home based around something fun but lighter, like chilli with tortilla chips on the side. Scratches the nacho itch, but more filling and less calorific, and you still get to socialise. Plus you all save a bit of cash.

    Try Indian food, Chinese food, pizza - there are recipes for lighter versions of all these things out there that can be the basis of a night in with friends.
  • Lesscookies1
    Lesscookies1 Posts: 250 Member
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    Well you can bank your calories if you want, and save enough, so you can eat the food you want without going over your calories if you wanted.
  • ladyhusker39
    ladyhusker39 Posts: 1,406 Member
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    Go out if you enjoy doing so. In fact, it will serve you better to learn now how to do it while keeping within your calories whether losing or maintaining.