I love how I looked but hated the work

It's a shame that you're going to lose all your hard work. After all that time you didn't learn portion control? Many don't count calories in maintainance,but again, many gain the weight back. I'd encourage you to look up the maintaining threads. There are different ways to do it and you might find some help there. Do it before you have to start from scratch.

i hate counting calories too. i don't any longer. Thinking about every bite of food forever is stressful for me, It takes the fun out of the beauty of food and meals. i switched to a whole foods eating plan, where i weigh my protiens ..but i eat six times a day...vegs...carbs..frut...lean meats. Bottom line, i've lost almost all my weight and weigh less than i ever have counting calories for 8 years. Now i get to think of what i CAN eat..lnstead of what i can't.

Research other healthy eating plans and make a switch that works for you. You can do this! Dont erase all your hard work by binging... you don't have to count calories forever. There are other paths to fitness. Good luck.

When my son was little it was really hard. I had “kid” food around and was usually in a hurry so that was the food that was convenient and easiest to reach for. One trick was I started buying myself convenience foods that were “mommy” foods and kept ours separate. He had his chocolate cliff bars and goldfish crackers and I had my protein bars and 1oz bags of almonds. Also planning my meals out for the next day at night when he went to bed was a huge help towards my goals

THere are still things you can do to set yourself up for success. I have a husband and 2 girls (11 and 14). They want things all the time that aren’t “food journal friendly”. It’s easy to say “don’t buy it”, but when you have others in the house who can buy that stuff (the husband), and often does buy other stuff that isn’t “food journal friendly”.

I have a “snack box” and a dorm fridge where I keep 100-ish calorie snacks...snack bags of pretzels, hard boiled eggs, greek yogurt, string cheese, protein bars, fiber bars. That way when I get an urge for a snack, I go tot he box/fridge.

It’s hard to get past the “Oh, I just had a donut, the rest of the day is shot.” Idea, but the thing is, whatever you have ends up not being as costly as you might think....unless you have a box of custard filled frosted donuts. One donut is not likely to break the bank. Log it and move on. Stay on track, and don’t let it bring you down.

First of all I want to recognise that you have a lot of stress.

Our situations in terms of stress (and in terms of how we get where we are) are definitely *contributing* factors to whether we succeed or not.

But I do want to address the title of your post.

Most people don't end up on MFP because they are able to "intuitively" moderate their eating and activity.

I mean, I know there will be multiple people who will pop up and say I was never over-weight but a single incident had me gain 30 lbs, I lost the weight in 6 months eating Special Unicorns, and then I went right back to maintaining intuitively.

But they are not the majority of people on MFP!

So I don't see how you get out of putting in "work" to succeed. BUT, you can modify things so that "work" is... LESS work! And easier!

You don't have to be "perfect". You don't have to exclude a ton of stuff. You don't have to "cave" every time something goes wrong. You don't have to aim for a huge deficit making making it more likely you will break down, cave, and fail to adhere to your plan. You don't have to exercise like a maniac till it hurts to move (fun as that may be from time to time)!

But you DO have to be mindful. You DO have to pick and chose when you can afford a treat and when you can't afford a tread multiple times a day, or multiple days in a row.

There is another thread around where a person writes that she doesn't count calories because that was too much work. So she eats "healthy" and moderates and has been more successful that when she was counting.

Personally that would drive me nuts. Because you would obviously fail to maximize your eating if you adopted such a strategy. And if the only cost to maximize my eating is to jot down some figures in an app... who wouldn't want THAT!?!?!?!

But of course what I am perfectly willing to do drove HER nuts, which is why she does things her way!

But there is one thing that we are BOTH doing. We are both consciously making (some) decisions as to what we are eating and finding (some sort of long term sustainable) balance.

Either you will care enough to put in the work or you won't. And your reality will reflect what you chose to prioritise in terms of the work you are willing and able to put in.

But you may also find it easier to put in the work if you try to figure out ways to do this without being "perfect" and "strict" and by aiming for many small changes over time. Because that means you will have to put in LESS work!

I'm not a mum, but a friend of mine has said that you need to put yourself first sometimes. Because if you don't you can't be the mum your kid needs. I think that makes some kind of sense??

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