Ladies Who Lift
meganjonesuk1
Posts: 9 Member
Lifting Ladies..
How did you overcome your fear of getting out on that gym floor and picking up the barbell?
Currently I go to the gym with two friends, however we have very different fitness goals. Mine is to gain weight and lift HEAVY, another wants to reduce her fat percentage and do a lot of HIIT, and another wants to lose weight and maintain general fitness and prefers cardio...... the problem is I am massively nervous about walking out onto that floor by myself and doing it... but I know that I need to....
I've researched, planned my meals in calorie surplus for weight gain, and sorted out a lifting plan.. I just need to kickstart the whole thing!
What tips do you have for starting out on heavy lifting and for doing so in a heavily male orientated gym? ( where I go the ladies stick to the treadmill for example)
Thank you
How did you overcome your fear of getting out on that gym floor and picking up the barbell?
Currently I go to the gym with two friends, however we have very different fitness goals. Mine is to gain weight and lift HEAVY, another wants to reduce her fat percentage and do a lot of HIIT, and another wants to lose weight and maintain general fitness and prefers cardio...... the problem is I am massively nervous about walking out onto that floor by myself and doing it... but I know that I need to....
I've researched, planned my meals in calorie surplus for weight gain, and sorted out a lifting plan.. I just need to kickstart the whole thing!
What tips do you have for starting out on heavy lifting and for doing so in a heavily male orientated gym? ( where I go the ladies stick to the treadmill for example)
Thank you
4
Replies
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I just did it. My current gym is hard-core bodybuilders and powerlifters. And I was intimidated as *kitten* the first time I walked in there (and this was after lifting at an Anytime Fitness for a couple years). But I was determined to reach my goals, so I just did it.
Guess what?!? Everyone there is super nice. The man with his pro bodybuilding card = nice. The bodybuilding chick with the amazing hamstrings = nice. The ginormous powerlifter squatting 600 pounds for reps = nice. The strongman woman that looks like she could crush your head with her thighs = nice, and likes to give hugs. The normal lifters = nice.
They do look super intense and maybe even mean, because they are working HARD! It's not about you, I promise.
They love lifting. It's their passion. Most people want to share their passion with others. They'll be excited that you want to join the club.
Put your headphones on, walk in with your head up, and do your workout. Re-rack your weights, don't interrupt people during their set, use all the other gym etiquette, and you'll have no problem.22 -
Pick a lifting program and just go out there and do it. If you walk in with a plan, you're more likely to do it. I promise you, no one at the gym is watching you or cares (I mean that in a good way!). When I started, no one even talked to/bothered me. Now that I'm outlifting most of the guys, they ask me for advice. You're going to be fine!
ETA plus everything that @quiksylver296 said.4 -
Like others have said, I found that walking in with a plan really helped me to feel more at ease when I first started lifting. The first time I walked into my gym and tried to do my workout, I had an anxiety attack because of how nervous and intimidated I felt. I just forced myself to stick with it and it got easier each time I went and as my confidence increased.
I train in a male-dominated gym and I have found that they mostly just ignore me - especially since I am too shy to talk to anyone! I think that as long as you have good gym etiquette you won't have any issues since everyone is generally pretty focused on their own workout.
Good luck!5 -
When I first started, I was so nervous. I knew how to lift (from lifting at home) but I'd never used a squat rack and was nauseous about looking like an idiot.
So when I signed up, I went to the person at the front desk and said straight up... I've never used a squat rack before. It's all basement lifting. Could you please give me a bit of a tour and help me out?
He was great. Helped me get oriented and I was off to the races!
The other thing... I needed to know my weights before I got there so that I wasn't trying to math in my head and decide on the fly. Planning was my friend.
But yeah, for me, asking for that help was enough to Kickstart me.
Go get it, GRRRL!5 -
just do it. there is no easy way. there is no conditioning ...just do it and about the 4th or 5th time you will not even give it another thought2
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Hi! You are going to do great. I like what other people said, have a plan, don't be shy to ask for help and have some self confidence! The more you go, the more confidence you gain. When I was in your shoes, something that hadn't occurred to me that I heard another woman say was, most men will be more insecure than you will be. Their thought process will be, "this woman might think I am not strong if I don't lift heavy weights," or "what is this woman thinking about me and my beer gut." Get it? They are probably more concerned about how they appear to you, than you appear to them.
I have found a smile goes along way in life, in or out of the weight room! Go get it girl!4 -
Not giving a badgers *kitten* about others and concentrating on what I wanted to achieve. No one is really looking at you, they're doing their own thing too.1
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jennrobyn3 wrote: »Hi! You are going to do great. I like what other people said, have a plan, don't be shy to ask for help and have some self confidence! The more you go, the more confidence you gain. When I was in your shoes, something that hadn't occurred to me that I heard another woman say was, most men will be more insecure than you will be. Their thought process will be, "this woman might think I am not strong if I don't lift heavy weights," or "what is this woman thinking about me and my beer gut." Get it? They are probably more concerned about how they appear to you, than you appear to them.
I have found a smile goes along way in life, in or out of the weight room! Go get it girl!
I'd never thought about that needo before, but now that I know the guys in my gym, I know this is spot on lol1 -
Honestly, I've been told by men at the gym that I'm the intimidating one, b/c I'm a lady in the weight room. I'm 5'3.
You have a plan, a program, and a gym. Get to it.3 -
I think it's like going anywhere new...it's always a little unsettling. I've felt nervous and out of place anytime I've started up at a new gym, and I'm male. You just go and do it...eventually you get a feel for the room and who's who, etc. and it becomes a more comfortable place.2
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Everything everyone has said plus going to gym around same time has helped me.. Cuz same ppl, familiar faces, similar goals, and respect.0
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It can be really helpful to go at a slower time for your first few sessions, so the feeling of being surrounded by people (or having to rush because other people also want the equipment) isn't so intense. The people at the front desk can tell you when it's quieter and when it's packed. Even if you can't completely change your gym schedule forever, taking a few visits at a quieter time of day will help you get oriented to that part of the gym and stop feeling like a total new kid.3
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Humility and vulnerability are a great asset. The more you fail the more people are willing to support you! Be open to feedback and coaching. be sure to focus on quality movement. happy to talk more about this too!0
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It can be really helpful to go at a slower time for your first few sessions, so the feeling of being surrounded by people (or having to rush because other people also want the equipment) isn't so intense. The people at the front desk can tell you when it's quieter and when it's packed. Even if you can't completely change your gym schedule forever, taking a few visits at a quieter time of day will help you get oriented to that part of the gym and stop feeling like a total new kid.
Very good point.
5 to 6 p.m. is probably not a good idea.
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quiksylver296 wrote: »It can be really helpful to go at a slower time for your first few sessions, so the feeling of being surrounded by people (or having to rush because other people also want the equipment) isn't so intense. The people at the front desk can tell you when it's quieter and when it's packed. Even if you can't completely change your gym schedule forever, taking a few visits at a quieter time of day will help you get oriented to that part of the gym and stop feeling like a total new kid.
Very good point.
5 to 6 p.m. is probably not a good idea.
And I was going to post that my gym is quietest between 4-6.
Mum's are picking up and feeding their children, dads are not off work yet, and those without children are either prepping or eating dinner.
My gym starts filling up again at 6:30 and is packed by 7.
12-2 is 'getting a lunchtime workout in' crowd.
The mornings, except for very early, is a lot of physio and circuit classes.
I hit lucky, the quiet time is my preferred time.
Cheers, h.0 -
middlehaitch wrote: »quiksylver296 wrote: »It can be really helpful to go at a slower time for your first few sessions, so the feeling of being surrounded by people (or having to rush because other people also want the equipment) isn't so intense. The people at the front desk can tell you when it's quieter and when it's packed. Even if you can't completely change your gym schedule forever, taking a few visits at a quieter time of day will help you get oriented to that part of the gym and stop feeling like a total new kid.
Very good point.
5 to 6 p.m. is probably not a good idea.
And I was going to post that my gym is quietest between 4-6.
Mum's are picking up and feeding their children, dads are not off work yet, and those without children are either prepping or eating dinner.
My gym starts filling up again at 6:30 and is packed by 7.
12-2 is 'getting a lunchtime workout in' crowd.
The mornings, except for very early, is a lot of physio and circuit classes.
I hit lucky, the quiet time is my preferred time.
Cheers, h.
My gym starts heating up around 5:00. :happy: So, yeah, OP, check with your gym staff to see when the slow periods are.1 -
I've been lifting weights at home for awhile but got a membership to the gym at the college where I work because it's cheap and they have heavier weights than I do. First time I was a little apprehensive--I'm old (lol) compared to them, and few people over the age of 25 use the facility. But then I realized that no one cares including myself! Go in with a plan, go when it's less busy, do your thing.3
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I do have a massive fear of walking into the gym too, just walking in making me feel too self conscious! But luckily, I do workout at home, and have gotten myself tools so I can lift and lift as heavy as I want to as well. my only problem is not having access to leg press machine. But for you, I think you just pick up a program, check out the form videos on YouTube to make sure you have the moves right and just do it. Maybe listening to some motivational or angry music helps you shut down others, swallow your fear and getting it done.
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exactly what the first post said.... just do it. yeah, i'm not gonna lie, it scared the F out of me to do it for the first time and I was so intimidated, but once you do, you have no problem with it. at least that's how I was0
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I'm a member of a large gym. It has two floors. The upper floor has cardio and weight lifting machines and the women tend to stay there. Downstairs is where the big guys are and the super fit women. I've always known that I had to lift weights but was scared to go 'down there'. Finally, I said "kitten" it and I went. I chose a not so busy day and I just took my time. The people there aren't thinking about you. In fact, they look at you with respect/admiration. You know what the real deal is. As long as you don't hog the equipment, you're good in their eyes. Now I go downstairs to use the squat rack and get mad if there's a guy in there. I ask how long you going to be???? I'm full of myself now. Go! You'll get used to it before you know it. Don't let this pass you by. I've always regretted not starting sooner. Don't be afraid to walk in. When I see new people come in I don't think much of it and everyone else feels the same. Do it!1
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The best thing I could do for myself, because anxiety was such a huge deterrent for me, was plan and visualize. Figure out prior to a session what the equipment looks like, where you think it's located and do research on what the workouts are supposed to look like. I'd write down my routine on my phone so I always had access to it on the fly. Then I found the meanest, loudest, most aggressive music I could stand and turned up my headphones BEFORE I walked in the doors. But even that wasn't always enough for me on busy days. A lot of times I mock my own anxiety when I start to feel it...I tell myself "Oh my god look at EVERYONE staring at me. I'm such a f*** up and so distracting that they can't even do their own workouts because they're so busy judging me!" Then I'd do what I never want to do and that's take a look around and 99% of the people in the weight sections are doing their own thing. They didn't even know I was in there. Once I saw the absurdity of my anxious thoughts and acknowledged that, I got to work. It also helps to notice your own feelings towards new people in the gym. 9/10 you have mad respect for the underweight girl, the overweight beer gut guy, the obese chick who is in there doing sh**. I guarantee everyone in there is either not noticing those people and focusing on their own goals for the day OR when they do take notice it only lasts .2 seconds and it's all respect. Peace and love girl...anything that is daunting enough to give you heart palpitations is your body's way of telling you that you must do that thing.1
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I paid for a few sessions with a trainer to show me correct form, and let him know up front that I planned to do Stronglifts 5x5. We focused the training sessions on learning to deadlift, bench press, and checking squat form. Once I'd been in the weight area with him a few times, I felt better about going in on my own.
And as others have said, many times the guys there don't really care that you're there. The free weights section of my gym is almost all men, but I've only rarely been given any trouble by anyone. The regulars who see me in there regularly are polite and even complimentary of my progression. I also wear headphones and resting lift face to discourage getting chatted up when I don't want to socialize. And also, agree with finding a quieter time of day to go, especially while you're getting comfortable. I work part time and am at home with my daughter the rest of the time, so I can usually go in the late morning when it's not too busy.2 -
I started with the dumbbells (for some reason I felt less weird about using them), and then the small pre-set barbells, but finally was lifting more than those came in and had to step up to the regular barbells.
Having a set plan and exercises, already written down on my clipboard, means I'll go up and use those weights regardless of how intimidated I'm feeling that day.
Funny thing is, other than made up feelings in my own head that I'm not "lifting enough" to "justify" using the "big boy" weights, there's never been a reason for me to feel like I shouldn't be there. No one at the gym has ever given me an actual reason to feel that way, so I know it's all self-inflicted.3 -
So, @meganjonesuk1, did ya go yet?!?3
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I was a little nervous at first because I was usually the only female in the free weight area but the powerlifters in my gym were really great. After they realized how heavy I could lift they started asking me to help spot lol. Most of them competed with the same Fed as me so we had a lot in common. It can seem intimidating but if you just go in and don't put it off, trust me, it will work out fine for you!0
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I started a lifting program with a trainer at my gym and he has me lifting as heavy as I can but I have put up 5 pounds over the 6 sessions and I know it's not fat but I doubt its all muscle. Does putting on weight scare any of you ladies that are lifting or starting to lift? Maybe I shouldn't even bother weighing myself anymore!0
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I started a lifting program with a trainer at my gym and he has me lifting as heavy as I can but I have put up 5 pounds over the 6 sessions and I know it's not fat but I doubt its all muscle. Does putting on weight scare any of you ladies that are lifting or starting to lift? Maybe I shouldn't even bother weighing myself anymore!
No because my gain is slow and therefore has a reduced fat increase. You have to think about your goals, mine is to look like I have muscle so I have to inevitably put on the pounds.
It's a means to an end as it'll all come off again in a cut.2 -
Silkysausage wrote: »I started a lifting program with a trainer at my gym and he has me lifting as heavy as I can but I have put up 5 pounds over the 6 sessions and I know it's not fat but I doubt its all muscle. Does putting on weight scare any of you ladies that are lifting or starting to lift? Maybe I shouldn't even bother weighing myself anymore!
No because my gain is slow and therefore has a reduced fat increase. You have to think about your goals, mine is to look like I have muscle so I have to inevitably put on the pounds.
It's a means to an end as it'll all come off again in a cut.
I agree. If you do it slow enough, you won't even notice it. I've put on 10-12 lbs in six months and I honestly can't really tell. My body fat is still under 20%. My goal is to go slow enough that I'll recomp rather than cut at the end of my bulk.2 -
I was a nervous wreck the first time I had to go pick up a barbel! But with my anxiety I was frequently a wreck anyway lol. I've found getting over that first hump made me more confident and less anxious in general.
I think I'm the exception in that I have found myself drawing the wrong kind of attention as a lady who lifts, one guy sat and stared at me for a solid half hour on Sunday morning (ignored) and another man follows me around sometimes working on the machines/ benches adjacent to me waaay too often to be a coincidence and has come up to me mid-set 4-5 times now to ask inane questions about what I'm doing (he gets short sharp answers, I have headphones on, respect the code). It's a mark of how good lifting is for my self esteem that I'm not being scared away by this behaviour. It's pathetic and I just don't let it bother me.2 -
You just gotta do it. Go in there with an attitude of "I'm here to work hard" and "Don't get in my way" and you will be just fine. The right playlist will also help you lift with confidence. I generally listen to Heavy Metal/Hardcore Rap/Techno when I am lifting. You have a program and it looks like you have laid good ground work....trust in your plan. You got this!0
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