Fight Style

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  • Vikka_V
    Vikka_V Posts: 9,563 Member
    edited May 2018
    I'm very non confrontational, I get really stressed when people argue with me. I always think people have their own ideas and they are all equally as valid as my own.

    When I try to argue I get confused and forget my point, it's funny, but it also hurts my brain.

    When a client starts arguing with me, I just state "how it is" repeatedly, I don't argue.

    When I feel confronted, I usually blurt out way too much and hurt people's feelings, I lack tact when "put on the spot".

    If I'm really mad or want to piss people off I ignore them, I'll stare through them or just walk away/do something else.

    I do hold a grudge, but usually rationalize it and come up with reasons the person behaves the way they do and that is fine.

    I forgive but never forget.

    Edit - I forgive most people, somethings are unforgivable
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  • Bullet_with_Butterfly_Wings
    Bullet_with_Butterfly_Wings Posts: 5,545 Member
    bojack3 wrote: »
    Is it even a fight if you always win? ;)

    Fight Club doesn't count ;)
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    edited May 2018
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  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    edited May 2018
    I find that I rarely argue. I am very facts oriented and black/white which sometimes helps keep arguments from escalating. I tend to keep my guard up so I don't get my feelings hurt but I AM very assertive. I like things to be out in the open and hash it out civilly and then be done with it. I'm not a big grudge holder unless someone does me so wrong that I totally cut them off (rare). I am more likely to hold someone at a friendly distance and gradually warm back up to them.

    I guess if there is one thing that will bring out the fight in me it's feeling that I am in danger or a loved one is in danger/pain. That probably doesn't count as an "argument" though.

    As I get older, I'm more likely to laugh behind a person's back when they are wrong & insist they are right...I just pick my battles more than I once did.

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  • Versicolour
    Versicolour Posts: 7,164 Member
    I don't like fighting. I will never pick a fight. I don't hold grudges either because grudges lead to fights; and I don't like fighting.

    I let it go and I let it go and I let it go. I apologise for things I didn't do wrong, I back down and confess to things I never did to avoid a fight. I get pushed down and I stay down until the danger has passed. I shut my mouth for fear of saying the wrong thing and only open it to say "I'm sorry"

    Until my character has been attacked so much that there is only one part of me left that I recognise. Then I stand firm and will not be pushed. I don't speak, not even to say I'm sorry. I stare into the doorway to hell and don't blink, don't flinch, don't budge, don't scream. And then I'm gone.

    At least, that was me. I still don't like fighting and so just avoid people who bring confrontation into my life. Except for my kids. I am forced to fight with them every frikkin day just to get them dressed and ready for school! That is exhausting enough
  • SabAteNine
    SabAteNine Posts: 1,867 Member
    If there's not a huge wrongdoing that just happened, I'll probably have a discussion, not a fight. With arguments and deconstructing everything the other person said. Agreeing to some points if I deem them correct, disagreeing with others, going for consensus or at least a good run of the „let's agree to disagree, and you're free to do it your way while I'll do it mine”. I like to see things from different perspectives, if those things bear standing.

    If I can't, and there's something that happened and pushed me over the edge (in all fairness, it takes a LOT to push me over the edge), then I will *kitten* you up, burn the bridge and set fire to the whole county in the process. No taksie backsies.

    One thing that's really important for me though is never going to sleep mad. I don't like that. I used to have a case of the passive-aggressive in the past, this happened sometimes and it was unhealthy. So whatever I have to say, I do now, with the risk of restarting a 3-hour conversation in order to finally close it.
  • johnw83
    johnw83 Posts: 6,219 Member
    i only fight when i have to but when i am in the ring 4 muay thai i fight alot
  • slessofme
    slessofme Posts: 7,744 Member
    I typically only argue with people I care about and only about things I feel strongly about. Arguing is a very infrequent occurrence because I'm very empathetic and can easily understand different points of view. I do hold grudges, although I wish I didn't. I don't allow a grudge to ruin relationships though; I may be more withdrawn, cooler toward or reluctant to spend time with someone, but I don't shut them out entirely. Most often that makes me feel strong, but there have been times that I have felt like a very weak person for not just excising certain people from my life entirely.
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