How to get people in your life to support your goal.

architect98
architect98 Posts: 5 Member
in Motivation and Support
I feel as if I have been down this road for the thousandth time now. I begin a diet, lose weight, and feel good for a brief minute. Then before you know it, I lose motivation and fall back into the same routine of unhealthy eating and no exercise.

I've sort of deduced that this is my fault but I feel as if it is because I lack the people in my life to encourage me. My immediate family all eats like garbage and don't exercise and I have no one to push me and motivate me to be healthier. I spent a summer with my aunt and uncle who pushed me to be healthy and strive to be better and I did, I lost over 50 pounds that summer but upon returning home I gained it all back because my family didn't share the same ambitions of losing weight.

Anyone who has been in this situation before, how did you conquer this challenge and what makes you continue pushing yourself for better success.

Replies

  • kommodevaran
    kommodevaran Posts: 17,890 Member
    I think you have to realise that this is your project, and noone else's.
  • tulips_and_tea
    tulips_and_tea Posts: 5,741 Member
    architect98 wrote: »
    I feel as if I have been down this road for the thousandth time now. I begin a diet, lose weight, and feel good for a brief minute. Then before you know it, I lose motivation and fall back into the same routine of unhealthy eating and no exercise.

    I've sort of deduced that this is my fault but I feel as if it is because I lack the people in my life to encourage me. My immediate family all eats like garbage and don't exercise and I have no one to push me and motivate me to be healthier. I spent a summer with my aunt and uncle who pushed me to be healthy and strive to be better and I did, I lost over 50 pounds that summer but upon returning home I gained it all back because my family didn't share the same ambitions of losing weight.

    Anyone who has been in this situation before, how did you conquer this challenge and what makes you continue pushing yourself for better success.

    Per the bold, what did you do differently? Can you do the same things (or mostly) the same things now? You don't need to be pushed or encouraged. Sure, for some people it's nice, but you certainly can't depend on it for your own success.

    Start small. Make a change or two and then see how you feel. Keep building on that and you'll find what works for you.
  • architect98
    architect98 Posts: 5 Member
    edited May 2018
    BZAH10 wrote: »
    architect98 wrote: »
    I feel as if I have been down this road for the thousandth time now. I begin a diet, lose weight, and feel good for a brief minute. Then before you know it, I lose motivation and fall back into the same routine of unhealthy eating and no exercise.

    I've sort of deduced that this is my fault but I feel as if it is because I lack the people in my life to encourage me. My immediate family all eats like garbage and don't exercise and I have no one to push me and motivate me to be healthier. I spent a summer with my aunt and uncle who pushed me to be healthy and strive to be better and I did, I lost over 50 pounds that summer but upon returning home I gained it all back because my family didn't share the same ambitions of losing weight.

    Anyone who has been in this situation before, how did you conquer this challenge and what makes you continue pushing yourself for better success.

    Per the bold, what did you do differently? Can you do the same things (or mostly) the same things now? You don't need to be pushed or encouraged. Sure, for some people it's nice, but you certainly can't depend on it for your own success.

    Start small. Make a change or two and then see how you feel. Keep building on that and you'll find what works for you.

    I suppose one of things that I did differently was I wasnt surrounded by unhealthy eating. My aunt and uncle live off a very healthy diet with minimal sugar and fat. I didnt have the temptations present in my life that I do now. What I mean by that is suppose my family was planning to have a good meal but something comes up and they instead order out or go eat out. I fall back into the trap of eating healthy because I have an obsession with how junk food tastes and it breaks my rhythym. Im not saying I cant do it, I just need help on how to break that pattern more so than draw encouragement from my family members.

    kommodevaran wrote: »
    I think you have to realise that this is your project, and noone else's.

    Also, this helps no one. Having been through this before I know this is my own journey and inevitably every action and consequence is in direct relation to me. Maybe I am misinterpreting what you are saying which in that case I am sorry.
  • tcunbeliever
    tcunbeliever Posts: 8,219 Member
    So...you can be healthy when other people make it convenient to be healthy, but not when it's something you have to deliberately chose for yourself???

    That's all you.

    Your body belongs to you, and you are the only one who lives there...if you aren't willing to make deliberate effort to improve yourself, why would you expect the people around you to do that for you?
  • architect98
    architect98 Posts: 5 Member
    tcunbeliever wrote: »
    So...you can be healthy when other people make it convenient to be healthy, but not when it's something you have to deliberately chose for yourself???

    That's all you.

    Your body belongs to you, and you are the only one who lives there...if you aren't willing to make deliberate effort to improve yourself, why would you expect the people around you to do that for you?

    So what is your suggestion to breaking temptation as it is obvious this is what is leading to my pitfalls. If they are eating an unhealthy meal, what is your suggestion to keep from eating like garbage. And it wasnt necessarily that it was convenient, however it is much easier to stay healthy when you have access to healthier food thab when your family doesn't buy healthy snacks or healthy meals.
  • hellonew2015
    hellonew2015 Posts: 327 Member
    kommodevaran wrote: »
    I think you have to realise that this is your project, and noone else's.

    Right on Point! This ^^^
  • kenyonhaff
    kenyonhaff Posts: 1,377 Member
    It's hard if you don't have people that support you, and don't really "get it".

    MFP is a good second choice, as you can get people to emphasize, give advice, and inspire. When you realize that yes, people have lives that don't revolve around fatty food and do actually exercise, it helps.
  • seska422
    seska422 Posts: 3,217 Member
    edited May 2018
    architect98 wrote: »
    tcunbeliever wrote: »
    So...you can be healthy when other people make it convenient to be healthy, but not when it's something you have to deliberately chose for yourself???

    That's all you.

    Your body belongs to you, and you are the only one who lives there...if you aren't willing to make deliberate effort to improve yourself, why would you expect the people around you to do that for you?

    So what is your suggestion to breaking temptation as it is obvious this is what is leading to my pitfalls. If they are eating an unhealthy meal, what is your suggestion to keep from eating like garbage. And it wasnt necessarily that it was convenient, however it is much easier to stay healthy when you have access to healthier food thab when your family doesn't buy healthy snacks or healthy meals.
    You have a couple of choices.

    1. Work with what is provided. Eat smaller portions of low-nutrient, high calorie items and larger portions of high-nutrient foods.

    2. Buy and prepare your own food. Your food is yours and their food is theirs. I eat what I want to eat when I want to eat it and the others in the house do the same.

    Ask them if they would be willing to store tempting snacks in a cupboard rather than on the countertop where you can see it. If yes, great. If no, then that's their decision.

    "Support" doesn't mean that they need to change themselves or their behavior in the same way that you are changing.
  • mom23mangos
    mom23mangos Posts: 3,069 Member
    You sound like you are young and still living with your parents and siblings. Is that the case? They are in charge of purchasing and preparing the food? If they are not willing to buy you healthy food to prepare your own meals, I would advise getting a job where you can buy your own food. Then when they decide to get fast food, you can just say no thanks and go make yourself something healthy. That's what I do at home. I don't ask my husband and kids to limit what items are stored in the house or what they eat. When I cook for the family I cook a healthy dinner. If they don't want to eat it, no sweat off my back. I love fast food too. But unfortunately I can't afford the calories too often. You just have to have determination. And while I normally recommend moderation in all things, it sounds like you know you don't have willpower once you start eating junk food. If that's the case, you may have to ban yourself from it completely temporarily. I have a reading addiction. When I was in school it interfered with my grades because instead of doing my work or studying I would just read. If I started a book, I had to finish it RIGHT THEN. I couldn't moderate. So I had to ban myself from even picking up a book during the school semester. You have to find what works for yourself.

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