Morning ♥️

Happy Monday All, it's the start of a new week and fresh opportunities to make good choices. I'm hoping to step up my workout schedule this week and keep making healthy food choices.

joemac1988 wrote: »

Part of your problem is your mindset. You're not going on "another" journey, you're still on the same one. I've been victim to that and what it does is you have a bad period and you give up entirely for a while because you "failed". Ups and downs are all part of it and you need to accept that. When you "fall off the wagon", climb back up on that beyotch cause you only have one wagon.

I mean this constructively

This ^^ is so true.

Good luck!! You've got this! And this group of people here are excellent for support!

I'm no expert, but here is my 2 cents. Come up with a plan. If the plan does not work, come up with another plan. Seek therapy to get to the heart of what is stopping you (mentally) from reaching your goal. Don't give up and remember, you are not alone. All the best.

joemac1988 wrote: »

Part of your problem is your mindset. You're not going on "another" journey, you're still on the same one. I've been victim to that and what it does is you have a bad period and you give up entirely for a while because you "failed". Ups and downs are all part of it and you need to accept that. When you "fall off the wagon", climb back up on that beyotch cause you only have one wagon.

I mean this constructively

SO much this! I have definitely been where you are @tangledtwine with regard to regain, and still have emotional eating as a feature of my weight-maintenance landscape. MFP has helped me realize that I don't have to be perfect, don't have to start over, don't have to quit or make it worse when I make decisions that don't serve me... I just have to start where I am and make different choices. Best of luck to you here.

Sunna-W and other members, You have given me some really excellent ideas to consider. My plan is to start out with 2 days of meals and snacks that fall within my calorie range and rotate them for a week while I figure out 2 more days for the following week. I think I will do better with limited choices in the beginning until I get the discipline for myself in check. I am also using a modified higher protein and fat ratio for macros. My exercise will be stationary rowing, "modified" yoga stretches and walking during the day on my breaks.

My goal for this change is better health and strength as I enter my 60's. Ugh, where did the time go! Life is full and I think my mind/emotions would be better as I learn to take care of myself. So many days are wasted on thinking "when I get time I'll do it." Well here I am. Slow, steady, mindful.

What do you do for fun, hobbies, to de-stress? I am not greatly over-weight, but am broke from my time in the Marines, and get down/bummed out eating rabbit food and not being able to be as active as I would like. Some things that I do to help myself:

1 - Try and eat sensible, but if I have a craving for a cheeseburger, I indulge it once in the week and then get back on track the rest. Hardly no one can be perfect 100% of the time, so instead of beating myself up, I just enjoy life. Most days that's enjoying myself for the good diet I follow; on occasion, it's enjoying a meal that I crave.

2 - I've started meditating and just taking some down time for my brain. It helps me step out of the occasional funk I get in emotionally, if just for a few min a day, and grounds me to appreciate the moment. Also, another trick is to take 5-10 min a day and imagine yourself being the person you want. Really use your imagination and put yourself into that place (sights, sounds, smells). The more you see yourself at or past your goal, the more your mind gets wired into that 'reality' and it starts working with you to accomplish it.

3 - I use to play in HS band, and a few metal bands back in the day also, but haven't played anything in years. Recently picked up a cheap guitar to pluck around on, and also a banjo that I'm teaching myself to play. No delusions of being famous, but it's something I like and again, helps me to get away from negative thoughts. Painting, knitting, gardening, woodworking...whatever it is that you like, take that time to enjoy it and try to maintain a positive (or at least neutral) outlook during.

I realize many people have a busy life. Taking time like this can be hard, but I am a firm believer that you make time for the things that are important to you. If you're too busy to allow yourself to be the most important thing for even 15 min a day, you will most likely suffer emotionally and physically. I would suggest take a step back and evaluate if all the stuff you have going on is really...and I mean REALLY...as important to do/get done as you think.

tangledtwine wrote: »

Hi there

I'm about to embark on another weight loss journey. I imagine some of you will have the same experience - get to goal, put it all back on (and then some), repeat.

I'm looking for a way to lose weight sensibly but also work on my self esteem and head space, since I think a lot of this comes down to being an emotional eater.

Anybody else here doing the same? I'd love to speak to anyone who struggles with their head, and consequently, their weight!

Happy losses everyone

Tangledtwine x

I'm at the same point as you. In the past, when I've done well with losing weight, I had something to focus on. For me, it was fighting and getting to as low a weight as possible (and still being in the infinite division). So I'd go for 4 or 5 months, drop 30-40 lbs, and then put it all back on.

A big part of that was simply that I hate exercising and love pretty much all the food I shouldn't, as well as eating it in portions that are excessive. Because of that, I'd allow an injury, or a bad day, or whatever to lull me back into complacency, no matter how good I was doing on my journey. At one point, I had dropped over 60 lbs and was at the weight I graduated high school at. I was fitting clothes I hadn't previously been able to fit. I felt great. And then I got hurt. And it all went to crap then.

I found all the weight I had lost, and then some extra. And I felt like crap. MFP has helped because I feel that logging everything, good and bad, makes a difference. On the days I don't control myself, I can see just how bad I really am... even if it's all really just guesstimations.

Recently, I was involved with a narcissist for 3 years. I found out a few months back that they had gotten back into the LS (swingers "Lifestyle") and lied to me every step of the way about a LOT of things (and likely never meant any word ever said to me). It's honestly been one of the hardest things I've ever dealt with. I've never been more depressed in life, because I've never allowed someone to rule my heart and my head the way I allowed her to do. But you know who's never lied to me? Or cheated on me? Food. And alcohol. That's who. Sure, they might make me feel bad at times. But they're always there when I need them most. They're always there to comfort me.

So, I've had my good days, and bad days. But I've focused on not allowing those to control what happens. I don't let the bad day turn into a bad week. So that way that bad week doesn't turn into a bad month. And that bad month into a year... so on and so on. Instead, I'm focused on rising from the pile of ash that she left me in... rising from it in glorious fire like the great Phoenix.

I've been doing cardio almost daily since the new year, but when all this happened, I added back in a strength routine. I have dropped about 12 lbs since I started back up with the strength routine. I am being at least a little more mindful of what I'm doing during the week. Though, my weekends are all about misbehaving and I need to work on that. I started supplementing with some things to help with strength and muscle building (creatine monohydrate, HMB, BCAAs, Zinc/Magnesium, CLA + Carnitine), and it's helped. I'm getting stronger again. I'm seeing small changes in my physique, and it's all motivation to me.

I've always been bad at accepting compliments. I have pretty bad self-esteem and confidence in myself, and honestly am working on learning how to love myself. But I'd always laugh off the compliments, or explain that it's just because I was wearing black and it's a slimming color, or just assume the person complimenting me was being nice. But I've stopped that thinking. When someone compliments me, I genuinely thank them. Because it makes me feel better and it validates that what I am doing is working, even if I can't always see it (we're our own worst critic/enemy, right?). So when you start back on your journey, make sure you accept the compliments from your family, friends, and co-workers. I think it's a BIG part of finding our happiness (and I think many of us here are looking for that -- I know I am).

If you don't already do so, I'd also start a personal journal. Write down your feelings every morning and/or night. I've been doing this since everything ended and it helps. I was gifted a "Two Minute Mornings" journal by my HR director at work, back in December. I started using it when everything completely ended between the narc and I. And let me tell you... the difference that it makes with how the day goes (along with exercising). The difference in my mindset between then and now is wonderful.

Just remember this though, if nothing else... always keep moving forward. You might take a break along the way during your journey, so long as you don't put down roots in one spot. Just. Keep. Moving. (Or as Dori would say, "Just keep swimming!") Don't let the past determine your future. Live for the present. And let that determine your future. Carpe diem et Memento mori... Seize the day, because you could leave life today.

cassiebajjey wrote: »

My advice? Don't change everything all at once. Small, gradual decisions are the way to go for long-term LIFESTYLE changes. That's what you are doing, not losing weight, but improving your lifestyle to lose weight.
Oh and good morning!

I love this bit of advice. The more things you try to change at once, the higher your probability for falling back into old ways. Make small, gradual changes. When you see that those are now habit, add something new and small into the mix. Before you know it, things have changed, you've changed, and you won't even realize it.

I know how you feel, I just started over myself after putting all the weight I had lost back on. I too am an emotion eater, I wish you the best of luck!