Why would you do that?!

but fried chicken nuggets and fries in red boxes makes kids happy... there is even a smiley face on the box to prove it... infact... it says on tv... and tv doesnt lie... period... my heart just goes out to those parents.. it is hard to have self discipline.. even if you have no parenting discipline...

I am not going to apologize for my kids getting treats. Because as much as they love ice cream and chips, they also love string cheese, tuna, fruit, hummus, pickles, olives . . . I think if you make anything off limits it just becomes that much more appealing. But to each their own.

I think we are inherently lazy. Or at least predisposed to make the choice that requires the least amount of effort. And kids can WEAR. US. DOWN. Knowing this, I try to be patient with other parents. My wife and I both had the advantage of working many years in direct childcare, including an emergency shelter that was 24 hour care in a home environment - so lots of meals with kids. We had practice in firmly stating to the kids: this is dinner. You don't have to clean your plate, but you must *try* everything before getting seconds of anything else (or dessert). We gave them a variety of stuff. Sometimes they would be stubborn and refuse to eat anything. We weren't hard *kitten*. But were politely firm. "I understand you don't like anything on the plate. That is your choice to not eat anything. No, you cannot have dessert. I'm sorry." It will not kill a child to skip a meal.

Now that we have two girls of our own (7 and 9), we use the same principles. We are lucky in that we participate in a neighborhood food share - cook one night a week for four families (us + three other families), and deliver food to the other three families. Three nights a week, food is delivered to us. One of the families is vegan, so the whole dinnershare is. Our meals are generally pretty healthy, always tasty, and the kids are pretty good about trying new things.

I think my wife and I were lucky in that we learned THE SECRET before we had our own children: that short-term battle you just caved on can create a long-term war that is 100 times more difficult to fight. That's not to say we don't pick our battles. But let's face it: clear, consistent discipline requires more effort than the other extremes: totally lenient or a complete hard-*kitten*/say no to everything. The short-term hassle of patiently setting limits has a long-term benefit. And that hassle can be annoying as hell, especially after a long day, out at a restaurant when you just want to eat dinner. But it's worth it. It is an investment. There are no quick fixes.

Hmmm.. kinda sounds like changing my eating habits and lifestyle around healthier choices...

Okay so here is my rant for the day- All of us on here know that eating right and exercising are the healthy way of doing things. We all know that bad habits are hard to break. Nothing irritates me more than when I see someone on here with a similar post as this, "It's so hard for me to eat healthy when the kids are eating junk food all day. I just need to stay strong and not look at their treats!" Why, why, why are you teaching your kids the same bad habits that you are trying to break?! Even if they have started out with your old bad habits, help them break it now so they don't have to try to figure it out later in life when they start having healthy/weight problems!!! Okay, I'm done.

Agree but I also want my kids to have a healthy attitude towards food and that there aren't "bad foods". Our philosophy is moderation in everything.

There is a reason why we are facing a child obesity epidemic in our country. It is because parents are too lazy to get in the kitchen and cook their kids a healthy meal. NOT A DIET MEAL, a HEALTHY meal. Instead, you see the shelves empty when Chef Boyardee and Easy Mac are on sale. How satisfying would it be to have at least one microwaved meal everyday? How do you FEEL after eating junk food? Not too good huh? The poor food choices combined with the lack of physical activity (due to feeling like crap from the food choices) are a recipe for disaster, and we are all watching it happen to our children.

THAT being said, there is nothing wrong with a treat everyday, as long as the kid's only source of nutrition does not come from over salted, preservative filled crap in a can.

Hopefully MFP will still be around in 10-15 years when the kids get older.

I think we are inherently lazy. Or at least predisposed to make the choice that requires the least amount of effort. And kids can WEAR. US. DOWN. Knowing this, I try to be patient with other parents. My wife and I both had the advantage of working many years in direct childcare, including an emergency shelter that was 24 hour care in a home environment - so lots of meals with kids. We had practice in firmly stating to the kids: this is dinner. You don't have to clean your plate, but you must *try* everything before getting seconds of anything else (or dessert). We gave them a variety of stuff. Sometimes they would be stubborn and refuse to eat anything. We weren't hard *kitten*. But were politely firm. "I understand you don't like anything on the plate. That is your choice to not eat anything. No, you cannot have dessert. I'm sorry." It will not kill a child to skip a meal.

Now that we have two girls of our own (7 and 9), we use the same principles. We are lucky in that we participate in a neighborhood food share - cook one night a week for four families (us + three other families), and deliver food to the other three families. Three nights a week, food is delivered to us. One of the families is vegan, so the whole dinnershare is. Our meals are
generally pretty healthy, always tasty, and the kids are pretty good about trying new things.

I think my wife and I were lucky in that we learned THE SECRET before we had our own children: that short-term battle you just
caved on can create a long-term war that is 100 times more difficult to fight. That's not to say we don't pick our battles. But let's face it: clear, consistent discipline requires more effort than the other extremes: totally lenient or a complete hard-*kitten*/say no to
everything. The short-term hassle of patiently setting limits has a long-term benefit. And that hassle can be annoying as hell, especially after a long day, out at a restaurant when you just want to eat dinner. But it's worth it. It is an investment. There are no
quick fixes.

Hmmm.. kinda sounds like changing my eating habits and lifestyle around healthier choices...

Here is a counterpoint. (And I don't gripe about having snacks in the house.) I do not plan to eat 100% healthy 100% of the time. It's no way to live, in my opinion. Kids cannot be taught to make healthy choices if they don't have a chance to MAKE CHOICES. In other words, placing them inside a bubble that they will definitely not be living in for life denies them the chance to learn what a choice is. We keep cookies and such in the house for our kids and ourselves. We've been told repeatedly that my 4-yo has the healthiest lunches of any kid in his pre-school/kindergarten. Here are some of the rules he has to live with.

(1) If you don't eat all of your dinner, no desert/treat. No exceptions.
(2) If you don't eat your fruit at lunch, THAT is you desert after dinner.
(3) Every trip to the grocery store, you may pick out one snack food as long as you also pick out one fruit or vegetable.

Does my 4-yo love pizza, chicken nuggets, chips, and cookies? Yes! And he gets them in moderation. If he's asked what he wants for dinner, what will he say? Seriously? Broccoli, chicken, and rice. What's his favorite eat-out restaurant? Subway. Does he like McDonalds and ChuckECheese? Yes, but mostly it's about the playground and/or games. His favorite weekly activity? Our trips to the farmer's market.

If you're letting your kids have the run of junk food, you're teaching them bad habits. HOWEVER, if you deny yourself foods that you will not be denying yourself for life and/or not giving them choices, you are also teaching them bad habits. If you want to learn to make healthy choices for yourself most of the time and teach your kids to do the same, you have to model healthy choices AND allow them to make choices.