Why are people soooo mean?!?

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  • astarte09
    astarte09 Posts: 531 Member
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    My ex was like that... I realize now that is was because he was such a looser. He had really nothing to offer to this world, and it took us breaking up for me to realize that. This guy prob realizes that he is a POS and so he takes it out on the whole world acting like he is better.
  • Catherine10
    Catherine10 Posts: 24 Member
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    Just remember this is not about you. I was in an abusive marriage for 23 years. My sister has been a director of abusive centres all her adult life. She always says I was her most challenging case. She planted the seed to leave. It took a long time to realize that I was worth something other than what I was told by the person who I thought loved me. When I finally got out and with help realized that he didn't want me to have family or friends he wanted complete control. I had given him my power. Perhaps being supportive means that you ask your friend to call you at a peaceful time for her even if that time does not happen often. There is light at the end of the tunnel for your friend even right now she can't see the opening. I am forever grateful for my friends and I'm sure your friend knows that you support her. Loving Others is Easy when You Love and Accept Yourself.
  • MOMOFTWO29
    MOMOFTWO29 Posts: 8,276 Member
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    awww, what a mean and nasty thing for him to say. Just remember that you are a beautiful person, we all are. Don't let some mean person like him ruin your self esteem. I think you are a very beautiful person. :flowerforyou:
  • lulubar
    lulubar Posts: 739 Member
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    You truly are a perfect and beautiful human being - not requiring a single change to be loved and treated respectfully. People like him feed on causing pain and damage to others - your friend is already caught in his spiral of control and obviously only finds esteem in his approval - don't let him pull you into his spiral as well. You certainly don't need his approval and you can't help her from the inside, maintain your integrity by refusing to accept what he has to say about you. You really are perfect and beautiful - nothing he says will ever change that - unless you let it:flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:
  • porka29
    porka29 Posts: 868 Member
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    what a douche. screw him!

    yeah, F him!!!!!

    Honey, you don't let him get you down and or there's a whole Green Team who will go sit on him (before we all get in super shape!:laugh: ). I can only imagine what his wicked ways have done to your friend, unfortunately if she is taking it, be careful that you don't let her take you down too. Chin up missy!:flowerforyou:
  • Anna_Banana
    Anna_Banana Posts: 2,939 Member
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    You can diet and change the way you look. He'll always be an a/hole. People like that piss me off. I have a friend whose DH is a jerk, and I won't do anything with her when he's around. I tell her I love her and want to be around her, but I will only come around when he's not. I try not to even call when I know he's home.

    I know it hurts now, but in a couple of days you won't feel so bad, keep your chin up
  • Fitness_Chick
    Fitness_Chick Posts: 6,648 Member
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    I've often thought perhaps insecure ppl get mean to cover it up and then bully others so as someone else shared earlier in the thread, they then feel less insignificant, insecure themselves with knocking others down.

    Sad, but sometimes how folks deal with their issues.

    I think you're beautiful and I'm learning not to value opinions of those I don't respect in this world....it sure didn't come as an easy lesson but like anything it takes time to change our thinking.:happy:

    Keep in mind he is NOT someone that deserves given 2 thoughts too BUT I do totally understand the ouch of being name called. Not sure I am completely to the point of believing the 'sticks and stones' theory...but I'm getting there!:laugh: :happy: :flowerforyou:
  • letterfly
    letterfly Posts: 20 Member
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    I so feel your pain! My best friends boy friend, told me that he hate me so much that he wanted me dead! To top it off he told me this at my wedding reception, which he showed up drunk and overdosed on pain pills! The thing I can't understand is that I never did anything to him, and he only explanation was that he was jealous of me and hers relationship. The thing is that she stayed with him, when I am sure he treats her the same!

    I totally understand. He told her later that night that she needed to get me out of her life. I know it's because I know it;'s best for her to leave him and that takes his control away.
  • spiritmi
    spiritmi Posts: 61 Member
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    i agree with everything everyone has already said...and will throw in the old saying "that which doesn't kill us, makes us stronger"...not letting the mean things others might say or not get to you and take your own personal power away makes you stronger...your friend stays in the relationship because there is something in it that at this time is working for her...she may or may never leave...the more you lose weight and become who you are evolving to be, the more he will probably dislike you...and that is ok because it is his problem, not yours!!!...his dislike and nastiness might have a positive outcome for you in the end...everytime you have the urge to eat something you shouldn't or lack the motivation to exercise, let his ugly remarks push you to doing the right things...in the end, wouldn't the sweetest thing be being able to send him a photo of you at goal enclosed in a thank you card...what others think of us is really none of our business, but it this case it may be just what you need to show him how strong and powerful you are and how tiny and pitiful he really is...blessings to you on your journey...be there for your friend, but don't let her drama become your drama...

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