He wants to gain, I want to lose. How can I make meals for that meet both of our needs??

kkell2017
kkell2017 Posts: 7 Member
edited October 2018 in Health and Weight Loss
So basically, my husband has been going to the gym, eating more calories, mass gainer etc, and he wants to gain weight (healthy weight). Meanwhile I am trying to lose weight. This makes it difficult sometime for me when I want to cook dinner and the recipes I use is mainly low calorie, low carb etc. I know it doesn’t bother him, but I also want him to reach his goals as well as I want to reach mine.
Does any one have any tips, advice or thoughts on how I can make this work for both of our goals?

Thanks in advance!
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Replies

  • kkell2017
    kkell2017 Posts: 7 Member
    The problem with that is, he doesn’t have a “big” stomach. He can eat much bigger portions, because he gets full and if he over eats then he feels sick.
    musicfan68 wrote: »
    Easy, bigger portions for him, smaller for you.

  • T__Queen
    T__Queen Posts: 14 Member
    This is my boyfriend and I! A lot of it just comes down to portion control for us. I load up on the veggies, while he tends to grab, well, a lot of everything!
  • kkell2017
    kkell2017 Posts: 7 Member
    It’s hard for him to eat a lot of extra portions. He works nights and doesn’t have access to a microwave to reheat, and if he eats to much at once he feels sick (over eating). He doesn’t have a “big” stomach.
    He is trying so hard to gain, and it’s just not happening.
  • T__Queen
    T__Queen Posts: 14 Member
    Can you make two versions of your dinner? So add extra oil or butter for better fats on his veggies or whatever, but keep yours lighter? Sometimes my boyfriend and I do this. He'll butter a bun (or I'll skip the bun altogether), or he'll add a bit of extra butter on his veggies.

    Maybe just talk to him about how you can work in more calories (that are good), but without overdoing it with butter, or whole milk, or whatever the ingredient is?
  • Chieflrg
    Chieflrg Posts: 9,097 Member
    edited October 2018
    Make him an extra side of his favorite. I would recommend something on the higher carb side. He is going to need about half his calories from carbs preferably if he is bulking.
  • kkell2017
    kkell2017 Posts: 7 Member
    T__Queen wrote: »
    Can you make two versions of your dinner? So add extra oil or butter for better fats on his veggies or whatever, but keep yours lighter? Sometimes my boyfriend and I do this. He'll butter a bun (or I'll skip the bun altogether), or he'll add a bit of extra butter on his veggies.

    Maybe just talk to him about how you can work in more calories (that are good), but without overdoing it with butter, or whole milk, or whatever the ingredient is?

    I’ll definitely talk to him and see what he thinks, this would definitely be something that could help!
  • kkell2017
    kkell2017 Posts: 7 Member
    Chieflrg wrote: »
    Make him an extra side of his favorite. I would recommend something on the higher carb side. He is going to need about half his calories from carbs preferably if he is bulking.

    He has definitely upped his carb intake at lunch! It’s hard at dinner depending on what I cook, but I could add it to just his!
  • jenilla1
    jenilla1 Posts: 11,118 Member
    My husband and I have vastly different calorie goals. It's not a problem, though, because we only share one meal. We eat the same thing for dinner, and he gets all his extra calories from breakfast, lunch and snacks. Unless you are sharing all of your meals together, it shouldn't be that big of a deal. Since he doesn't like big portions anyway, he can just eat what you have for dinner and add extra meals throughout the day.
  • rheddmobile
    rheddmobile Posts: 6,840 Member
    kkell2017 wrote: »
    The problem with that is, he doesn’t have a “big” stomach. He can eat much bigger portions, because he gets full and if he over eats then he feels sick.
    musicfan68 wrote: »
    Easy, bigger portions for him, smaller for you.

    If it was just a question of straight calories, he could add calorically dense foods such as salad dressing, nuts, or avocado on his salad, cheese, or butter. But he still probably needs more protein to gain muscle than a smaller woman needs while eating at a deficit.

    Are there different proteins which he might find easier to double up on without feeling stuffed? Can he get in a couple servings as a snack without involving you, such as a shake?
  • PAV8888
    PAV8888 Posts: 13,530 Member
    Mass gainers (can) provide a lot of calories in addition to protein.... Snacks are good for increasing calories too.

    I would assume your common meals already include protein and veggies etc and that he can consume the quantities of these nutritious items that he needs.

    He doesn't need a huge surplus if he is trying for a lean bulk.
  • stej5639
    stej5639 Posts: 57 Member
    We have the same problem. I'm trying to gain and my fiance is trying to lose. I normally have bigger portions when we eat the same meal. When im in work i eat a lot of calorie dense foods, like nuts, peanut butter, eggs, whole milk etc. I also eat pasta for carbs and drink fruit juices. We buy full fat milk and semi and stick to our own bottle, ill drink the same amount but mines full fat for more calories, same with things like yoghurt.

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