What do you do when...
Leslietheriot
Posts: 303 Member
What do you do when you live with other people that constantly offer you really bad food when they are well aware that you are trying to lose weight? My boyfriend and his son bring home pizza, snack cakes, etc, and offer them. I say no and then they ask again and again until you finally give in. I have talked to them about this. I have to lose weight for health reasons. Any help?
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Replies
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No, just has to mean NO. Don't let them keep on you. If they do just keep saying no. Sounds easier than it is, but if you keep caving they are not going to take you seriously.0
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After you say no, just leave the room for a bit..0
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It's like Dear Abby suggests you reply when someone asks a rude question. 'Why do you ask?'
Maybe they don't realize they're pushing food.
Try saying 'Why do you think I SHOULD eat that?'
Could be a lightbulb moment for them in realizing what exactly they are doing.0 -
Seems to me like someone who cared about you wouldn't act like that.
Sorry... Truth!0 -
Rather than giving in: Can you leave the room? Go for a walk? Go work out to a DVD? Plug in to an ipod and literally tune them out? Failing any of those - go to bed and lie down? Scream at them? Make your voice heard. How old is his son?
Maybe sometime when your boyfriend *isn't* shoving food at you, ask him how he benefits by doing that kind of thing to you. Explain to him (again) that you're doing this to be healthy and while pizza, etc tastes good, it's really not something you want to indulge in because you feel that other options are better for you. Explain that when he shoves food at you, it makes you feel X. He'll either get it or not, but you'll have laid it out for him.0 -
No, just has to mean NO. Don't let them keep on you. If they do just keep saying no. Sounds easier than it is, but if you keep caving they are not going to take you seriously.
Ditto! Keep saying No. It will get easier, and they will get the hint. It might also be helpful if you had some alternatives to eat instead.0 -
My sister lives with me. She works at Costco and has Hyperthyroidism so she does not understand. Not only does she buy crap, but she buys it in bulk! I told her that if I have to continually see the food, I will throw it out no questions asked. She now has a cupboard all to herself so that I do not have to look at the junk food continuously. She has learned not to offer me any of the crap since I am now eating healthy. My suggestion, have a sit down conversation with your boyfriend and explain to him that you are eating healthy and you would appreciate it not being shoved in your face. Hide the crap food so that you do not have that temptation staring at you all the time.0
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I think I'm going to take it a step further and just go to the gym when they start doing that to me. Maybe that will get the point across
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One good thing I've found that helps is "That looks delicious, but I'm not really hungry. I'll try some later." The "later" never comes Repeat as needed. 0
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When people nag me I tell them, "The answer is still No, and you are beginning to piss me off." Any one who knows me backs off..right now. I accompany this with my best seriously pissed off face. It took some practice, but has served me well.0
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It's like Dear Abby suggests you reply when someone asks a rude question. 'Why do you ask?'
Maybe they don't realize they're pushing food.
Try saying 'Why do you think I SHOULD eat that?'
Could be a lightbulb moment for them in realizing what exactly they are doing.
Love that, so smart!!!0 -
Beef up the will-power (i know, easier said than done) and remind them that you need/expect/appreciate their support in your journey. If they truly love and care about you, they'll respect your position.0
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That's how I am. I have told them that if you ask repeatedly the answer is NOT going to change but you are going to piss me off and it does.0
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this happens to me.
tell them ur on a diet and u dont want any.
if they ignore that like the people im living with do.
tell your partner that he has 2 choices. 1 keep handing u food / offering u food and u get fat. 2 him stop and u gt sexy!
let him decide! lol0 -
I'm going to be as blunt as I can...you either want to be fit/skinny/sexy...or you don't. Don't eat it. My house is filled with crap because others in the house like it, I won't impose my health nut lifestyle on them. They want health problems, it's their problem...not mine. They don't like it? It's too damn bad.0
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When people nag me I tell them, "The answer is still No, and you are beginning to piss me off." Any one who knows me backs off..right now. I accompany this with my best seriously pissed off face. It took some practice, but has served me well.
This.0 -
I say "Misery loves company" and who wants to be miserable????
Stay strong and if you have to get mean about it....well do what ya gotta do!0 -
Thanks everyone! You guys are awesome! I feel much better knowing that you are all here for the support that I needed. Feel free to add me as a friend...as I have none. Thank you all so much! Now off to the gym :-D0
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Personally I'd ask them a few questions like 1. is it healthy? 2. Is there a salad and fruit in there? and 3. do you WANT me to die early? But that's me, I'm a saracastic B****h! Stay strong and don't cave to the sabatours!0
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This used to happen to me too! I was trying to eat more healthily, but my boyfriend would bring home tons of junk food to eat for dinner. My solution: have food already made for your dinner/snack. That way, you can say that you already have food, and if they persist, tell them that if you don't eat the food you already made, it'll go bad. 0
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Maybe they're practicing this theory: If you fatten up everyone else around you, then you look thinner.0
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My ex who I am living with for another month eats like crap and is 40 lbs overweight and doesn't exercise. (He also told me the other day how he was fit, at 5'9", 225 lbs with a HUGE gut . . . yeah right! But that's a whole other topic!)
For him, eating and food are pleasurable, and sharing it with a loved love is showing love. Just like your grandmother that makes you that cheesecake you really love when you go to visit her, even though she knows you've been on a diet and are trying to lose weight. In addition to food = love to many, if they aren't educated on nutrition and how many calories are really in things, they'll often say/think, "One slice/serving/ etc. won't hurt . . ."
It may not be out of malice, more a lack of awareness.0 -
Seems to me like someone who cared about you wouldn't act like that.
Sorry... Truth!
I'm in total disagreement with you.
I'm guessing pizza was a thing you did in the past, and lifestyle changes are hard for others to grasp.
If you don't live with the BF than make your house/apt a junk food free zone, just don't let them bring it in. OR just make your own food, instead. Maybe make Friday night a pizza night, but make pizza together, way more fun for all involve! (not to mention better pizza). Set boundries and stick to your guns. You changed your lifestyle, not theirs.0 -
Seems to me like someone who cared about you wouldn't act like that.
Sorry... Truth!
I'm in total disagreement with you.
I'm guessing pizza was a thing you did in the past, and lifestyle changes are hard for others to grasp.
If you don't live with the BF than make your house/apt a junk food free zone, just don't let them bring it in. OR just make your own food, instead. Maybe make Friday night a pizza night, but make pizza together, way more fun for all involve! (not to mention better pizza). Set boundries and stick to your guns. You changed your lifestyle, not theirs.
It's one thing to ask someone to eat with you. It's a whole other thing to badger them and guilt them into eating the food and especially when you have medical problems because of weight. It's inconsiderate to treat someone you care about in that manner.0 -
It's one thing to ask someone to eat with you. It's a whole other thing to badger them and guilt them into eating the food and especially when you have medical problems because of weight. It's inconsiderate to treat someone you care about in that manner.
It's totally ridiculous to blame one's lack of self control on her boyfriend.0 -
That's how I am. I have told them that if you ask repeatedly the answer is NOT going to change but you are going to piss me off and it does.
But in the OP you mentioned that they keep on until you give in.... are you giving in to them?0 -
I have given in to their badgering and yes...that was my choice...and it was the wrong choice to make. And yes, when we got together almost 2 years ago, we shared our meals and it was "quality" time together. My weight gain was totally my fault. No one forced to put anything in my mouth. But now instead of sitting down and eating a meal together, we work opposite shifts because of the children and our time together mainly consist of doctor's visits. Sucks, but thats how it is. In his defense, I do understand why he wants me to sit and eat pizza and ice cream and whatever with him...it WAS enjoyable to us both when I was 35 pounds lighter. I am a sarcastic b*tch and I tend to be nasty with him when he brings home crap food. I was just looking for some suggestion that i had not tried. Thanks all.0
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I quite like this approach. It's more fun. :-)When people nag me I tell them, "The answer is still No, and you are beginning to piss me off." Any one who knows me backs off..right now. I accompany this with my best seriously pissed off face. It took some practice, but has served me well.0 -
I dont have much suggestion for snacks but for meals what I do Is I plan a weekly dinner menu and I stick to it. Even if I get home and it's the very last thing I want to do, I force myself to cook and I'm always happy that I did instead of ordering a pizza.
I always over cook so that My husband can eat as much as he wants and I only make interesting flavor filled recipes as I can't eat plain grilled chicken breast with plain brown rice and a side of steamed veggies...waaayyyy too bland for my taste buds. I still have to be diciplined to stick to the portion size that fits my calorie allowance. HOWEVER, my husband does try to watch what he eats as well, but he's 6'3 and 235 lbs and I'm 5'1 and 142 lbs trying to loose 20 lbs...our calorie needs are VERY different haha
my favorite website for recipes is myrecipes.com and i make the cooking light magazine recipes. They have all the nutritional info on the recipes, but I've also been adding them to this site so that it's more accruating using the exact ingredients I use.0 -
Perhaps your bf doesn't want you to succeed... is he overweight? Is he intimidated by your success? Or could he be insecure about u looking better and finding someone else? Just throwing that out there....0
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