Dieter's Creed

Strict is my diet I shall not want.
It maketh me lie down at night hungry.
It leadeth me past the confectioners.
It trieth my will power.
It leadeth me in the paths of starvation for my figure's sake.
Yea, though I walk through the aisles of the pastry department, I will buy no sweet rolls, for they are fattening.
The cakes and the pies, they tempt me.
Before me is a table with green beans and lettuce.
I filleth my stomach with liquids.
My day quota runneth over.
Surely calories and weight charts will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the fear of scales forever.

I found that on a plaque at a thrift store and had to buy it...I was laughing in the aisle! It doesn't say who wrote it so...

Enjoy!