Some people just don't get it
CarvedTones
Posts: 2,340 Member
On Fridays, there are generally pastries brought in to the office and today was no exception. A giant apple fritter looked really good. I got a knife, cut it it in half and then cut one of the halves in half and took 1/4; still a few bites, this thing was big. An overweight coworker rolled his eyes - "You don't need to do that. You're skinny." - then took the rest of the fritter. I opened my mouth to say something but words failed me and I just had to turn and walk away.
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Those back-handed compliments that are really subtle digs? My favorite!13 -
Makes you wonder how they haven't put the pieces together yet...21
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CarvedTones wrote: »On Fridays, there are generally pastries brought in to the office and today was no exception. A giant apple fritter looked really good. I got a knife, cut it it in half and then cut one of the halves in half and took 1/4; still a few bites, this thing was big. An overweight coworker rolled his eyes - "You don't need to do that. You're skinny." - then took the rest of the fritter. I opened my mouth to say something but words failed me and I just had to turn and walk away.
yep-- that was one of the things I posted in the pet peeves post... People tend to think that thin people are thin because of some magical unicorn metabolism and can eat all the things...um no, we're thin because we don't eat all the things. Deluded people have apparent issues with cause and effect.32 -
CarvedTones wrote: »
I suppose he put them together in his stomach
I've been told I eat like a bird. I don't, really, but it's difficult to explain to someone 8 inches taller and twice your mass why you can't eat as much as they do (it shouldn't be, but it is - at least getting them to understand is). So I just smile and nod now. I can still put away some food, if I'll willing to accept the consequences.9 -
Or they think that once you're thin, you can go back to eating the old way and the weight won't come back. As though the diet was an antibiotic and the weight was a bacterial infection.57
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CarvedTones wrote: »
I suppose he put them together in his stomach
I've been told I eat like a bird. I don't, really, but it's difficult to explain to someone 8 inches taller and twice your mass why you can't eat as much as they do (it shouldn't be, but it is - at least getting them to understand is). So I just smile and nod now. I can still put away some food, if I'll willing to accept the consequences.
Yep- similarly, the having to explain post-group-ride/run (to a bunch of tall muscular males) exactly how few calories someone my size burns per mile.5 -
On the opposite end if the spectrum -
I got a bag of chips out of the vending machine and an overweighted coworker told me 'you're not allowed to have that since you've lost weight'. None of your business! I shouldn't have responded, but I did: 'I am maintaining at a BMI of 20 and work out 6 days a week. I'll eat a 140 calories of chips if I want! I do not comment on your choices, do not comment on mine.'
What you or me or anyone else chooses to eat is our own business and no one else's.66 -
Am I the only one who doesn’t like to see a half or quarter donut/fritter in the box? You never know if someone held it with a napkin while they were cutting or used their hands, etc.
I just take the whole thing back to my desk and toss half if I don’t want it.
ETA: not saying that was what the OP did, of course. Just a general thought on the topic.21 -
Copper_Boom wrote: »Am I the only one who doesn’t like to see a half or quarter donut/fritter in the box? You never know if someone held it with a napkin while they were cutting or used their hands, etc.
I just take the whole thing back to my desk and toss half if I don’t want it.
I am careful about that, holding it by the part I will take. That's why I didn't cut it in quarters; I never touched the first half I cut away. I can see how someone walking up later wouldn't know. the coworker that took it watched me cut it. The pieces I leave always disappear. I could use a knife and fork and leave both to be obvious. A tangent - I don't use the trash can in my office unless I have a lot of trash to put in it. The cleaning crew always takes the entire plastic bag if there is anything at all in it. If I throw away half a donut, I see the soul of a baby seal go wafting by.22 -
Unless it's put back with an obvious bite mark, I'm not squeamish enough to care. But I don't much like doughnuts anyway. Maybe the odd cake one.15
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A coworker (happened to be female) recently ranted to me about how "unfair" it is that men can lose weight so much easier than women. All the while she was eating from a 16oz Styrofoam cup full of ice cream with nuts, chocolate sauce, and sprinkles on top - this is no joke. I was speechless...39
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Or they think that once you're thin, you can go back to eating the old way and the weight won't come back. As though the diet was an antibiotic and the weight was a bacterial infection.
I love this description. To some degree, I used to do that. If I was staying ~225 eating that way, why couldn't I stay ~185? I know the answers to that. The reduced burn and at ~225, I was aware enough that I would make adjustments and not eat the big bowl of ice cream every day. At ~185, it was okay.
At ~155, I know that's just plain stupid. 6 -
Or they think that once you're thin, you can go back to eating the old way and the weight won't come back. As though the diet was an antibiotic and the weight was a bacterial infection.
YES! So many people seem to think this way about diets, and I know a lot of people who gain and lose the same 20 lb for decades because of this mindset!
I also hate it when people say how "easy" it is for men to lose weight. My husband is healthy and somewhat overweight but it's much harder for him to lose than it is for me. In fact, he laughingly says he is jealous of my menstrual cycle simply because I always drop like 3-5 lb at one point in the month. When we go out for Mexican his weight will spike almost ten pounds from sodium, while I may be up 1 lb or so.8 -
I think MOST people don't get it.... had this kind of thing happen to me many times, I just ignore, ignore, ignore now (read that to be, smile and say nothing).4
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Lol! Ummmm yeah, that's why I'm thin dumbass.11
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When someone says something like that to me, I go into great detail about why I eat the way I do. I tell them all about it until their eyes glaze over and they walk away. It's better for me if they think ending the conversation was their idea rather than them thinking I gave them the brush off as I have this reputation at work of being unfriendly and difficult to approach. Generally, after a few times, people stop saying anything because they've figured out I will blather on and on for as long as they let me and it's just better if they don't even get me started. BTW, it's not that I'm not unfriendly or difficult to approach, it's that small talk is fake, dumb and boring.23
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Reading this post sipping on my lemon water, taking my thyroid medication and hating you all... Its a thing... But I will give your side a try, I have been logging my food, and riding out on my elliptical like the second coming of something big... LOL Last month during my stabilization month science told me I needed to eat 833 less calories out of my average 1500 calories a day to stop the weight gain. I said quietly to myself "Oh hell no! Hommie don't play that" and cleaned up my gently used (OK never used) elliptical for the deficit! No one is messing with my sugar free roasted almonds snack... I am willing to take up arms to defends them... *flexes*15
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The last two weeks I've had several work and off-site professional functions that had food. So far I've indulged a little, but logged everything reasonably possible, and have maintained within 2 pounds. So far, so good!9
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It's almost funny to see people stuffing the sweets like nobody's business, and then take digs at us for not digging in.9
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I hear you on that. While I am still quite obese, I have lost a noticeable amount of weight since September. A co-worker asked me last week how I was doing it. I told her that I was eating less food. She kind of laughed it off and said well that's no fun.16
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nicsflyingcircus wrote: »I hear you on that. While I am still quite obese, I have lost a noticeable amount of weight since September. A co-worker asked me last week how I was doing it. I told her that I was eating less food. She kind of laughed it off and said well that's no fun.
This! So much this. I've been maintaining for about 9 months and I still run into people who haven't seen me in a while and they always ask what I did. When I tell them they're almost disappointed, look bored and walk off.
Everyone is waiting for that magic bullet and if it's something mundane as eating only as much as you need they can't be bothered.9 -
I would just say that this is how I can be fit or what I need to do to be slim. Make it your decision about you and let them decide if it might be about their decisions about themselves.2
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I've never commented on anyone's eating habits until I worked with a tiny girl that ate lunch in the office from 5 different take away places at the same time and because I was the fat one in there people would glare at me and shake their heads. WTF I wasn't even eating at all. I told her she needed to post a warning on the office door that it was her food so people would stop death staring me. (a joke obviously, she was a good friend of mine)6
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I think I may be guilty of feeding the myth, sometimes.
I'm now retired, and live alone. Most of my meals are at home. My habit (in maintenance) is to eat below maintenance most days, so that if I go out with friends I can eat and drink pretty freely, of special/unusual foods I really enjoy. So, some of my friends mostly or only see me eating kind of indulgently, but staying thin.
If anyone asked (only one person has), I'd describe the process that's working for me. A few others have seen me order a veggie burger without the bun or a salad without croutons sometimes (I'm not a huge bread fan, so it's gotta be super good bread to be worth the calories), so they think I maintain a healthy weight by "cutting out bread" (have said that!). Yet others have said it must be that all my rowing keeps me thin - insisted, in the face of my disputing it, in fact . . . even people who knew me when I was obese, and knew I was rowing just as much then.
Denial is strong.
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honestly.. it is sad if you think about it. You're the lucky one.. you lost your weight and you do get it. You can even eat a tiny slice of a treat and walk away... and that poor thing is stuck in a fat suit, saying obnoxious things on top of it..11
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born_of_fire74 wrote: »When someone says something like that to me, I go into great detail about why I eat the way I do. I tell them all about it until their eyes glaze over and they walk away. It's better for me if they think ending the conversation was their idea rather than them thinking I gave them the brush off as I have this reputation at work of being unfriendly and difficult to approach. Generally, after a few times, people stop saying anything because they've figured out I will blather on and on for as long as they let me and it's just better if they don't even get me started. BTW, it's not that I'm not unfriendly or difficult to approach, it's that small talk is fake, dumb and boring.
lol..love this strategy...it is how I get rid of people all the time... start talking in detail about what they are annoying you with... boom. they go away.1 -
elisa123gal wrote: »born_of_fire74 wrote: »When someone says something like that to me, I go into great detail about why I eat the way I do. I tell them all about it until their eyes glaze over and they walk away. It's better for me if they think ending the conversation was their idea rather than them thinking I gave them the brush off as I have this reputation at work of being unfriendly and difficult to approach. Generally, after a few times, people stop saying anything because they've figured out I will blather on and on for as long as they let me and it's just better if they don't even get me started. BTW, it's not that I'm not unfriendly or difficult to approach, it's that small talk is fake, dumb and boring.
lol..love this strategy...it is how I get rid of people all the time... start talking in detail about what they are annoying you with... boom. they go away.
Maybe that's why none of the overweight people at work ask me about weight loss anymore, because I use a similar tactic.
Or it could be simply that nobody likes talking to auditors, which I am... 🤔😂12 -
At work there is a girl doing the keto diet. To lose weight specifically. I overheard her talking about when she gets to her goal weight she's going to celebrate by binging and eating all the things she hasn't been able to eat for the last four months. Hmm... Sounds sustainable.24
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elisa123gal wrote: »born_of_fire74 wrote: »When someone says something like that to me, I go into great detail about why I eat the way I do. I tell them all about it until their eyes glaze over and they walk away. It's better for me if they think ending the conversation was their idea rather than them thinking I gave them the brush off as I have this reputation at work of being unfriendly and difficult to approach. Generally, after a few times, people stop saying anything because they've figured out I will blather on and on for as long as they let me and it's just better if they don't even get me started. BTW, it's not that I'm not unfriendly or difficult to approach, it's that small talk is fake, dumb and boring.
lol..love this strategy...it is how I get rid of people all the time... start talking in detail about what they are annoying you with... boom. they go away.
Same here... lol1
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