5'4" 112 lbs with pictures

I love your blogs. The Self Esteem Snapshot one was sooo great! I really don't think much about how I look on any given day. I watch what I eat for health reasons and to try to avoid a large weight gain because of a recent smoking quit...I exercise now because I feel better with the quit and the healthier eating I have more oxygen and more energy . I feel strong and healthy even though I am 44years old and 10 pounds heavier than I have ever been. I don't even think about the weight gain until I see a picture...then my world seems to fall apart..when I see that old lady with the thicker waistline in the picture....I can't help that I feel totally lied to...how can I look like that when I feel so young, strong, and (lol) taller...your post said all those feelings just so right...I even go online also to look for others with my height weight ratio to try to convince myself that it's not as bad As I think I see in my own photos and That I am just being hard on myself....It's a shame we feel this way sometimes because we are trying to fit into some ideal of health and beauty when those ideals really aren't ideal at all...I never beat myself up for my weight before because I never have had issues because I was always lower in weight but I didn't feel as alive and healthy then as I do now.....So I took the camera and took many pictures of myself from many angles and made peace with myself...this is me...44 years old, cellulite, wrinkles, dark circles under my eyes, the starting of jowls, thicker waist, short legs, little boobs, a tummy that's held two babies, A heart that's loved so many, eyes that have seen some wonderful and some sad moments, a brain that is wiser and still young and vital, lungs that are healing, muscles that are thanking me for reawakening them, A body that shares and has shared my every moment with me....it is my best friend and I wouldn' t ever think of loathing or hating someone else in my life for not being as thin or pretty as I would like them to be,,,,,why do I do that to myself,,,,I am my own best friend and as my best friend I deserve my unconditional love and inspiration.......

wow, great blog!

i am glad you posted this, otherwise i would have never seen it - considering i don't read the blogs on here

i'm really glad that you did - it was definitely something i needed to hear! I am currently struggling with that "just 5 more pounds.." chant running through my brain. keep wanting to lose more even though i know it is absolutely ridiculous. I should print this out and hang it up on my fridge

THANKS. and yes, i'd rather be marilyn

Great blog!! You made some great points. I really want my younger sister who just started college to read this because she's going through that stage where you just keep wanting to lose 5 more pounds. Thanks!