I don’t get it
ellioc2
Posts: 148 Member
Today was the day of my bi-weekly weigh in (blind weights). I’ve been eating 1200-1400 calories a day and exercising about 3-4 times a week. I try to burn 600 on the elliptical when I go. Before this I was averaging 5 pounds weight loss every weigh in. Today’s weight loss? A measly pound. For two whole weeks. I’m so mad at myself right now. Granted, I did go out with my classmates last night to celebrate the end of the quarter (I had a Cobb salad and tried to scrape off the cheese and use minimal dressing. I had one beer too). I ate more like 1500 yesterday because of that. But today I went straight back to what I had been eating and I had a pretty intense workout session. I know sodium can cause some water retention, but that much? Shouldn’t I see the scale move a little more? I was venting to my husband and he told me I just need to eat less and work harder, which is so frustrating because I feel like what I’m doing already is a lot. I don’t think I’ll ever be thin and I’m so mad at myself. I know I said that already, but I am. I’m just a fat failure 
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Replies
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How much do you have to lose? And how long have you been at this? It's unrealistic to expect to lose 5lbs every week unless you're currently over 500lbs (tone doesn't carry well in print, so please believe that I'm not trying to be snarky. I don't know anything about you.)
Generally speaking, you should be shooting for max 1% of your bodyweight per week. You may lose a bit more than that in the first couple of weeks, but that's mostly water weight, not fat. After that, things generally settle down and you start to lose at a more reasonable rate. Remember that to drop a pound per week, you need to eat 3500 calories below your maintenance level (i.e. 500 calories per day less than your total daily energy expenditure: TDEE). To drop 5lbs per week, you'd need to eat 2500 less than TDEE daily. You don't want to eat below your BMR (Basal Metabolic Rate, i.e. what you burn daily just by existing). Weight loss takes time. It's a marathon, not a sprint.
You are not a failure. You dropped a pound this week. That is excellent!
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Yes, sodium can make a difference if it makes you retain water. It can also be because you pushed a bit harder in the gym (muscles retaining water as they repair themselves), or a lot of other reasons. With weighting yourself just once every 2 weeks all you know is your weight that day and weight fluctuates up and down. Maybe yesterday you were a pound more down. As long as you're achieving a downward trend, you're making progress.
5 pounds every 2 weeks is 2.5 lbs a week, that's a bit of an agressive rate. How much weight do you have to lose overall? How much still til goal? How much weight have you lost already? It's normal for weightloss to be quick when you start, and slow as you go.
Not sure if you weigh your food, but there's always the chance you are eating more than you think. Are you eating back your exercise calories? (You should).
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Unless you are extremely obese, 2.5 lbs/week is likely not a healthy goal for you. And our body weight, especially as women, fluctuates constantly and can mask underlying fat loss. If you are unfamiliar with water weight fluctuations, you might benefit from daily weigh-ins for a while to get an idea how much weight you gain/lose under ordinary circumstances. With weekly or bi-weekly weigh-ins, you may just catch yourself on a high day. You will still see it trend downward over time, but it definitely requires a more relaxed, patient attitude
You might find this thread helpful:
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10084670/it-is-unlikely-that-you-will-lose-weight-consistently-i-e-weight-loss-is-not-linear/p19 -
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Don't take this the wrong way, but you need to stop taking weight loss advice from your husband. Your rate is already WAY too aggressive and MFP is designed for you to eat back at least some of your exercise calories. A 600 calorie burn sounds too high, as most MFP database estimates are, but you should at least be eating back half of that, likely more. At your current weight, at the rate you are losing, you are costing yourself a lot of lean muscle mass which is not only unhealthy, but won't be very asthetically pleasing in the end. A woman needs to net at least 1200 to meet her body's basic requirements.35
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Unless you are extremely obese, 2.5 lbs/week is likely not a healthy goal for you. And our body weight, especially as women, fluctuates constantly and can mask underlying fat loss. If you are unfamiliar with water weight fluctuations, you might benefit from daily weigh-ins for a while to get an idea how much weight you gain/lose under ordinary circumstances. With weekly or bi-weekly weigh-ins, you may just catch yourself on a high day. You will still see it trend downward over time, but it definitely requires a more relaxed, patient attitude
You might find this thread helpful:
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10084670/it-is-unlikely-that-you-will-lose-weight-consistently-i-e-weight-loss-is-not-linear/p1
I had just eaten dinner (I had a fairly big dinner - huge piece of steak and huge side of roasted vegetables) and drank a lot of water since I had sweat so much at the gym. So I’m kind of hoping it was just that :-/
Most people don't weigh-in immediately after a large meal
It almost certainly was that. That makes me worry even more about your actual rate of loss.
We all want the weight gone yesterday, but we shouldn't sacrifice our health & lean muscle to do so. Your heart is a muscle too.14 -
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Don't take this the wrong way, but you need to stop taking weight loss advice from your husband. Your rate is already WAY too aggressive and MFP is designed for you to eat back at least some of your exercise calories. A 600 calorie burn sounds too high, as most MFP database estimates are, but you should at least be eating back half of that, likely more. At your current weight, at the rate you are losing, you are costing yourself a lot of lean muscle mass which is not only unhealthy, but won't be very asthetically pleasing in the end. A woman needs to net at least 1200 to meet her body's basic requirements.
Yeah, he’s naturally skinny/slim and he actually has to work to put weight on! It’s very mathematical to him, the calories. I don’t think he understands the nuances of dieting and calorie counting at the low end and what it does to the metabolism. Not to mention my mood, I’ve been really hangry and just plain irritable lately.
Math is a wonderful thing, but only when combined with sound knowledge about weight loss. Maybe this will help:
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10569458/why-eating-too-little-calories-is-a-bad-idea/p19 -
estherdragonbat wrote: »How much do you have to lose? And how long have you been at this? It's unrealistic to expect to lose 5lbs every week unless you're currently over 500lbs (tone doesn't carry well in print, so please believe that I'm not trying to be snarky. I don't know anything about you.)
Generally speaking, you should be shooting for max 1% of your bodyweight per week. You may lose a bit more than that in the first couple of weeks, but that's mostly water weight, not fat. After that, things generally settle down and you start to lose at a more reasonable rate. Remember that to drop a pound per week, you need to eat 3500 calories below your maintenance level (i.e. 500 calories per day less than your total daily energy expenditure: TDEE). To drop 5lbs per week, you'd need to eat 2500 less than TDEE daily. You don't want to eat below your BMR (Basal Metabolic Rate, i.e. what you burn daily just by existing). Weight loss takes time. It's a marathon, not a sprint.
You are not a failure. You dropped a pound this week. That is excellent!estherdragonbat wrote: »How much do you have to lose? And how long have you been at this? It's unrealistic to expect to lose 5lbs every week unless you're currently over 500lbs (tone doesn't carry well in print, so please believe that I'm not trying to be snarky. I don't know anything about you.)
Generally speaking, you should be shooting for max 1% of your bodyweight per week. You may lose a bit more than that in the first couple of weeks, but that's mostly water weight, not fat. After that, things generally settle down and you start to lose at a more reasonable rate. Remember that to drop a pound per week, you need to eat 3500 calories below your maintenance level (i.e. 500 calories per day less than your total daily energy expenditure: TDEE). To drop 5lbs per week, you'd need to eat 2500 less than TDEE daily. You don't want to eat below your BMR (Basal Metabolic Rate, i.e. what you burn daily just by existing). Weight loss takes time. It's a marathon, not a sprint.
You are not a failure. You dropped a pound this week. That is excellent!
Since 2 weeks, actually :-/ See my above post for where I am. I know I don’t have hundreds of pounds to lose, but I just feel really icky in my body and want to get out of that overweight BMI range (my body likes being there I’ve found, which is annoying). A nice thin person weight smack dab in the middle of my BMI range would be great. I’m sick of feeling like my body is barely adequate and pudgy. I don’t think anyone would call me “fat” but they certainly aren’t calling me thin.
I see that. A pound is still good. With 20lbs to lose, really, 1lb per week is about the most aggressive you can safely shoot for and 1/2lb would be better. You just don't have the fat reserves to lose more quickly. Which means that you're also going to be losing muscle. Your heart is a muscle.13 -
Don't take this the wrong way, but you need to stop taking weight loss advice from your husband. Your rate is already WAY too aggressive and MFP is designed for you to eat back at least some of your exercise calories. A 600 calorie burn sounds too high, as most MFP database estimates are, but you should at least be eating back half of that, likely more. At your current weight, at the rate you are losing, you are costing yourself a lot of lean muscle mass which is not only unhealthy, but won't be very asthetically pleasing in the end. A woman needs to net at least 1200 to meet her body's basic requirements.
By the way that burn is based off the elliptical machine itself (which I realize might be off), not MFP database. I don’t even track it on here because i haven’t been eating back my exercise calories.
I can't speak to the accuracy of elliptical machines, but honestly, based on your rate of loss, it sounds like you could be eating those 600 calories no problem. And a food scale is always a good idea. Most people tend to underestimate how much they are eating, but you don't want to be cheating yourself either.4 -
I'm going to second the advice of stop listening to your husband about your weightloss. The things you said he told you will make you sick and to be very honest I'm afraid either they'll hurt your chances at long term success or could lead you down the road to disordered eating.
MyFitnessPal has your deficit build into the calorie goals it gives you. That means if you have it set to the max of 2lbs a week and it tells you to eat 1400 cal day, it's because it estimates you burn 2400 a day just going about your life. This banks you 1000 cal/day, 1000x7 days = 2 pounds. Exercise is mainly for health, not to lose faster. I lost my first 20 without hitting the gym.
Maximum healthy weightloss is 1% a week. For you, that's 1.6 pounds a week rn and will continue to go down as you get closer to your goal weight. Losing too fast exposes you to all kinds of problems, such as gallstones. A faster rate of loss means more loose skin and muscle loss.
I lost 50 pounds in 5 months eating at a 1000cal/deficit (meaning my mfp cals + exercise calories, I was 294 at the start). You will not gain if you eat your exercise calories. I would recommend a lower rate of loss, like 1lbs/week.
I strongly recommend that you get a digital food scale.11 -
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Don't take this the wrong way, but you need to stop taking weight loss advice from your husband. Your rate is already WAY too aggressive and MFP is designed for you to eat back at least some of your exercise calories. A 600 calorie burn sounds too high, as most MFP database estimates are, but you should at least be eating back half of that, likely more. At your current weight, at the rate you are losing, you are costing yourself a lot of lean muscle mass which is not only unhealthy, but won't be very asthetically pleasing in the end. A woman needs to net at least 1200 to meet her body's basic requirements.
Yeah, he’s naturally skinny/slim and he actually has to work to put weight on! It’s very mathematical to him, the calories. I don’t think he understands the nuances of dieting and calorie counting at the low end and what it does to the metabolism. Not to mention my mood, I’ve been really hangry and just plain irritable lately.
TBH you need to stop thinking that you're on the biggest loser and can lose 10lbs per week, and start a more sustainable weight loss regime. you sound miserable, that's no way to live.
you may not love your body right now, but you should love yourself enough not to want to damage it just to lose 5lbs in a couple of weeks.16 -
After you lose the weight you'll have to watch watch your portions so you won't gain it back. Get a food scale--the last 20 lbs are the hardest. Start to study your portions, and your macros--protein, carbs, fat and sugar. I agree that you shouldn't lose more than 1 lb a week. You are too nervous and need to calm down. Eat enough to fuel your workouts and maybe throw in some yoga or meditation. Your husband is very different from you (mine is exactly the same, only he doesn't give me advice) so don't listen to him. He means well. Good luck. Remember aside from looks, you're doing this for your health.4
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Your husband either doesn't understand that there is no intentional exercise built into your MFP goal or he doesn't understand weight loss at all. Ignore him either way. His comments are particularly dangerous given your history of disordered eating.
You said it's hard to tell what is healthy dieting and what is disordered. You should consider checking in with your treatment team (or a new one, considering you've been recovered for 10 years). What you're doing now--netting 800 calories, calling yourself a fat failure when you're only 20 lbs overweight--sounds fairly disordered to me.22 -
As mentioned you are already losing way too aggressively for your stats. It is not healthy for your body, and you will lose extra muscle mass (as per your other thread you want to lower your bodyfat% and maintain muscle, well, this is NOT how to do it).
All of what you are saying plus a previous ED, I think it would be a good idea to check in with your treatment team or doctor since some of those feelings seem to be resurfacing.11 -
Second the suggestion about finding a treatment team.
You are being unreasonably hard on yourself.
You are not eating enough and your body is responding to that.
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You can’t effectively or accurately “think” yourself to be a particular weight and then base a weight control plan around eyeballing the portion sizes.
Get a scale and use it religiously , logging everything you eat .
You will have a better chance of success with real data, hard facts on which to base your thinking1 -
May I ask what your husband's qualifications are to be giving you this kind of dangerous advice? Your two weight management needs couldn't be more different if you tried.
You've been given a lot of really solid advice here, so I won't repeat it except for one:
Please check in with your doctor or treatment team. Don't wait until the red flags have run all the way up the pole. Huge hugs to you and please keep us posted!
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The scale is not the best way to gauge weight loss as it can be 2-5 lbs inaccurate and your weight fluctuates during the day due to many factors, water retention is one of them. Don't believe me? Try weighing yourself every 2 hours on the same scale. You'll be surprised how often it fluctuates.
You also have to keep in mind that "eyeballing" food for calorie content simply doesn't work. Unless you're tracking every single morsel you eat, your 1400 calories could be substantially more (or less) than you think. Also, unless you spend an hour or more each work out day on the elliptical, you aren't burning 600 calories per session.
And finally if you have reached a plateau in your weight loss, change the workout. Your body may simply be getting used to the form of exercise you are performing and it doesn't need to work hard at it anymore (we all experience this at some point). If you really want to lose weight and keep it off, start weight training/resistance and increase protein consumption over carbs. Cardio is great for overall health but if you want to trim down and look good, weights are the way to go. You may also want to try swimming. Swimming can use more muscle groups than you thought you ever had and is great exercise for toning.
Bear in mind this final note: if your scale is reporting a loss in weight you should be happy...god forbid how you should react if it reads a gain in weight!
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Just one more suggestion about weighing food. I have a low fat popcorn I eat alot as a snack and had started out by measuring it into a bowl and then always using that bowl. The package had the usual verbage saying that 50 grams or 7.25 cups was 260 calories. I thought wow that's great so I ate around 3 cups in a sitting. My weight had started sneaking up so I weighed it. My 3 cup bowl ended up being 42 grams which was not 130 calories as I thought but more like 200. So as a result I was over just on that one snack daily. 6 ounces of steak is very small and I would suggest you weigh it next time and you might be surprised.
I also agree that at 160 pounds trying to lose 2.5 pounds a week is way too aggressive. I understand believe me but take your time and lose a bit slower and you will accomplish a few things. 1. you will be more likely to keep it off as you learn to permanently change your habits. 2. You will protect your muscle - remember the heart is a muscle. 3. You will feel a heck of a lot better while you lose.
Good luck OP you can do this but cut yourself a little slack and enjoy the process.
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The scale is not the best way to gauge weight loss as it can be 2-5 lbs inaccurate and your weight fluctuates during the day due to many factors, water retention is one of them. Don't believe me? Try weighing yourself every 2 hours on the same scale. You'll be surprised how often it fluctuates.
You also have to keep in mind that "eyeballing" food for calorie content simply doesn't work. Unless you're tracking every single morsel you eat, your 1400 calories could be substantially more (or less) than you think. Also, unless you spend an hour or more each work out day on the elliptical, you aren't burning 600 calories per session.
And finally if you have reached a plateau in your weight loss, change the workout. Your body may simply be getting used to the form of exercise you are performing and it doesn't need to work hard at it anymore (we all experience this at some point). If you really want to lose weight and keep it off, start weight training/resistance and increase protein consumption over carbs. Cardio is great for overall health but if you want to trim down and look good, weights are the way to go. You may also want to try swimming. Swimming can use more muscle groups than you thought you ever had and is great exercise for toning.
Bear in mind this final note: if your scale is reporting a loss in weight you should be happy...god forbid how you should react if it reads a gain in weight!
You didn't read the rest of the thread, did you? While your advice is generally sound, this OP doesn't need advice on how to keep her weight loss moving. She has a history of ED and is pursuing a dangerously aggressive weight loss plan 7 -
I'm just going to quote myself from your other thread:kshama2001 wrote: »I’m due for a doctor checkup in several weeks. The main reason is just to check in about how some new meds are working for me, but I know I will be weighed which causes me a lot of anxiety. I have made some pretty drastic changes this fall to my diet/exercise after this doctor let me know that it’s “time to get serious about hitting the gym and eating cleaner”. I have a history of an eating disorder, so weight has always been particularly sensitive for me - I usually do blind weights and we kind of tiptoe around it, but I’m tired of this anxiety and decided to take it into my hands. I knew I was in the slightly overweight category, so could stand to lose some weight by the way. So I’ve been working out 2-3 times a week and I’ve reduced my caloric intake to 1200-1400 a day. About a month ago I did get a scale that my husband agreed to do blind weights on me every 2 weeks. Since then I’ve lost 10 pounds (5 pounds each time) according to him. I don’t know how much weight I’ve lost before that from September when I started to late October. Anyway, I’m just nervous. I’m nervous she won’t think it’s enough or she’ll think it’s the greatest thing ever and think I should keep it up. I’ve been noticing some GI issues lately (cramping, diarrhea, nausea) that are not my norm that’s a bit concerning. It might be stress related, it also might be due to the high-fiber, bulky foods I’ve been eating. I’ve also noticed that I’ve been more irritable and feeling cold. Some of my hair has been falling out. Not a lot but more than normal. But if I bring that up to her, am I making excuses? This should be easy, right? If I’m seeing results and I have the weight to spare I should keep on doing what I’m doing. I just don’t know how the session is going to go and it’s causing me a lot of anxiety. Since I’m in weight loss mode, I now feel as if I have something to “prove”. I know this all might sound silly but this is where my mind is at right now.emmamcgarity wrote: »Given that you have had an eating disorder in the past, lost 10 lbs in two weeks, and your hair is falling out, I recommend you up your calories to maintainence and schedule an appointment right away. You can request not to be weighed until after talking to the doctor. Bring a list of concerns to show the doctor and ask for a strategy for the weight loss that is safe and reasonable. Be abosolutely positive to share the past eating disorder first. Once you’ve gone over your list of concerns, just get weighed so that you and your doctor can work as a team to address your concerns and come up with a good approach.
@ellioc2 I agree that you are losing weight too fast. With only 20-30 pounds to lose, there's no need to create such an aggressive deficit that is causing you to lose 2.5 pounds per week - that's for someone who has over 100 pounds to lose.
... Ask your doctor for a referral to an eating disorder specialist.5 -
Don't take this the wrong way, but you need to stop taking weight loss advice from your husband. Your rate is already WAY too aggressive and MFP is designed for you to eat back at least some of your exercise calories. A 600 calorie burn sounds too high, as most MFP database estimates are, but you should at least be eating back half of that, likely more. At your current weight, at the rate you are losing, you are costing yourself a lot of lean muscle mass which is not only unhealthy, but won't be very asthetically pleasing in the end. A woman needs to net at least 1200 to meet her body's basic requirements.
I was thinking the exact same thing. If you lose too quickly, end up skinny fat with loose skin, you might still look soft. Something I'm sure you or your husband won't appreciate. Not to make him look like a bad guy, I'm sure he has your goals in mind. But a rush to the finish line isn't in your best interest long term. Been there, heard how I need to eat once a day, eat only salad, juice and smoothie diet, etc. But what works long term for me is moderate, sustainable weight loss, which includes eating some of the exercise calories back.1 -
MHarper522 wrote: »I'm going to second the advice of stop listening to your husband about your weightloss. The things you said he told you will make you sick and to be very honest I'm afraid either they'll hurt your chances at long term success or could lead you down the road to disordered eating.
MyFitnessPal has your deficit build into the calorie goals it gives you. That means if you have it set to the max of 2lbs a week and it tells you to eat 1400 cal day, it's because it estimates you burn 2400 a day just going about your life. This banks you 1000 cal/day, 1000x7 days = 2 pounds. Exercise is mainly for health, not to lose faster. I lost my first 20 without hitting the gym.
Maximum healthy weightloss is 1% a week. For you, that's 1.6 pounds a week rn and will continue to go down as you get closer to your goal weight. Losing too fast exposes you to all kinds of problems, such as gallstones. A faster rate of loss means more loose skin and muscle loss.
I lost 50 pounds in 5 months eating at a 1000cal/deficit (meaning my mfp cals + exercise calories, I was 294 at the start). You will not gain if you eat your exercise calories. I would recommend a lower rate of loss, like 1lbs/week.
I strongly recommend that you get a digital food scale.
Ah, disordered eating. It’s hard... I actually had an eating disorder (like full blown anorexia) in high school. I’ve been recovered for 10 years. I’ve just gotten fat in the process. It’s especially difficult for me because I’m like is this disordered or is this just normal dieting? And I know it’s a slippery slope. But I want this weight loss so bad
Does your husband know about your past history with eating disorders? Is that why he’s managing your weight loss (telling you how much to eat/exercise and hiding the scale while you weigh in)? It sounds like he’s trying to be helpful, but really missing the mark.
It would be a good idea to read the stickies and learn some more about weight loss basics for yourself. If you can afford it, it might be worth a one-time meeting with a registered dietitian to develop a plan that works with your previous ED history.
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If the goal is to have a trim attractive body at this point I think you would get more out of a progressive lifting routine. Do it for a year.
Bouncy scales is normal, give or take five pounds. It’s not a reflection of your effort.0 -
I agree with the previous posters that your rate of loss is too aggressive and that you should definitely talk to your treatment team, or at least a mental health professional with solid ED experience.
It gets hard to not think about the way you eat to lose weight as a temporary thing and that when you've gotten to goal you can go back to eating the way you were before. It's meant to be changes in the way you live your life. I would hate to think of anyone having to live their life with an eating disorder, especially someone who made it into recovery for a decade. Your weight loss doesn't need to be aggressive, it doesn't need to cause you a burden of stress, and exercising should be something you enjoy. Although it may not be how we want it, if it took you 10 years to put on the weight, why would it be unreasonable to have it take a year or two to take the weight off?
Also, it's been said in this thread already but I feel like it bears repeating and highlighting because I don't feel like the connection is brought up enough:
Losing weight too quickly can cause you to lose muscle mass. Your heart is a muscle. If you lose too quickly, you can potentially damage your heart.
I genuinely hope it works out for you. And if you need moral support or want to rant, we're all here for you!5
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