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Single People in their 40s
At what point do you just say kitten it? Like you say, nevermind, I'll just read MFP and romance novels and eat dessert any time I want and roll my eyes at people who want to talk about how mean their boyfriends are and how ungrateful their girlfriends are and rest in the knowledge that I've retired from the pursuit permanently.
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What is this pursuit you speak of?0
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Pour_Decisions wrote: »What is this pursuit you speak of?
Like, ooh, does he like me? Is she just being friendly or does she want me to mash her against the wall and smooch her? Is he going to text me? Better take my phone off silent 24 hours a day just in case he does. Oh no. I sent that text 15 minutes ago and he hasn't answered. Does this mean he doesn't like me anymore? How can I get a hold of his phone for a few minutes when he's not looking and snoop it? Is she friendzoning me? Should I wax my unibrow? Is she dressing like that to get my attention or is she just a loose woman who's dropping the hook for whoever will bite? You know...4 -
Pour_Decisions wrote: »What is this pursuit you speak of?
Like, ooh, does he like me? Is she just being friendly or does she want me to mash her against the wall and smooch her? Is he going to text me? Better take my phone off silent 24 hours a day just in case he does. Oh no. I sent that text 15 minutes ago and he hasn't answered. Does this mean he doesn't like me anymore? How can I get a hold of his phone for a few minutes when he's not looking and snoop it? Is she friendzoning me? Should I wax my unibrow? Is she dressing like that to get my attention or is she just a loose woman who's dropping the hook for whoever will bite? You know...
Ugh, this is way too exhausting. I just don't have the patience nor the desire to deal with anything like this. I'm in my late 40's and happily single. IF I decide to date again then there will be no games nor passive aggression. Either he likes me and is able to show it or not and I move along.2 -
At what point do you just say kitten it? Like you say, nevermind, I'll just read MFP and romance novels and eat dessert any time I want and roll my eyes at people who want to talk about how mean their boyfriends are and how ungrateful their girlfriends are and rest in the knowledge that I've retired from the pursuit permanently.
When did you say kitten it?
Who is your favorite romance novalist?
What is your favorite dessert?
Do your eyes hurt from all that rolling or do you have rest days?
Are you logging it as exercise?
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Chael2dot0 wrote: »At what point do you just say kitten it? Like you say, nevermind, I'll just read MFP and romance novels and eat dessert any time I want and roll my eyes at people who want to talk about how mean their boyfriends are and how ungrateful their girlfriends are and rest in the knowledge that I've retired from the pursuit permanently.
When did you say kitten it?
Who is your favorite romance novalist?
What is your favorite dessert?
Do your eyes hurt from all that rolling or do you have rest days?
Are you logging it as exercise?
Last kittened when I was 28. I'll be 52 in a few weeks.
The late Nuala O'Faolain. Her book My Dream of You is the best love book I've ever read.
Creme Caramel.
They often hurt yes.
I don't log exercise.
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It got old within the first week. Too much hassle to sort through hundreds of messages from guys I'm not interested in. Dating in my 40s after a 23 year relationship is an eye opener.
But I'm still doing it. Or trying anyway. Let's see how much longer I can put up with it until I burn out and give up and buy the Crazy Cat Lady Starter Kit.2 -
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_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »It got old within the first week. Too much hassle to sort through hundreds of messages from guys I'm not interested in. Dating in my 40s after a 23 year relationship is an eye opener.
But I'm still doing it. Or trying anyway. Let's see how much longer I can put up with it until I burn out and give up and buy the Crazy Cat Lady Starter Kit.
"100's of messages" girl..all the woah.
I didn't say they were *good* messages. If anything, they're amusing. I screenshot the "best" ones and share with friends. lol
Sometimes I can't believe the things people think it's appropriate to say to a complete stranger online...
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_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »It got old within the first week. Too much hassle to sort through hundreds of messages from guys I'm not interested in. Dating in my 40s after a 23 year relationship is an eye opener.
But I'm still doing it. Or trying anyway. Let's see how much longer I can put up with it until I burn out and give up and buy the Crazy Cat Lady Starter Kit.
"100's of messages" girl..all the woah.
I didn't say they were *good* messages. If anything, they're amusing. I screenshot the "best" ones and share with friends. lol
Sometimes I can't believe the things people think it's appropriate to say to a complete stranger online...
I'm with you! I have left here a few times from being tired of the inappropriate messages too!1 -
Don't give up... Don't ever give up!_BlahBlah_BlackSheep_ wrote: »It got old within the first week. Too much hassle to sort through hundreds of messages from guys I'm not interested in. Dating in my 40s after a 23 year relationship is an eye opener.
But I'm still doing it. Or trying anyway. Let's see how much longer I can put up with it until I burn out and give up and buy the Crazy Cat Lady Starter Kit.
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I'm happily married.
But I sometimes MISS living alone and if he ever leaves me or dies, I will absolutely be perfectly happy to stay single. I'll eat what I like and I'll load the dishwasher correctly and I'll never watch basketball ever again. And the dogs will sleep with me. And I'll park my car in the garage like God intended.2 -
I am aware of this brilliant freedom...JeepHair77 wrote: »I'm happily married.
But I sometimes MISS living alone and if he ever leaves me or dies, I will absolutely be perfectly happy to stay single. I'll eat what I like and I'll load the dishwasher correctly and I'll never watch basketball ever again. And the dogs will sleep with me. And I'll park my car in the garage like God intended.
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I miss the idea of having someone here to do things with and help me when I'm suffering medical issues like I'd help her if she had issues.
I spent 10 years helping her with her issues while not taking care of mine. I don't miss it and honestly at this point don't want another 10 years or 30 years or however long I manage to keep myself from pushing up daisies taking care of someone else while not taking care of myself.
It took me a long time to find the ex and while the idea of having someone here to talk to and spend time with doing things we both enjoy I honestly don't believe that mythical person exists any longer.2 -
I've never actually pursued it, nor will I ever have that chuck it attitude. Is there such a thing as aging out? Not from my immediate circles, reflecting upon it.
* My mother's man found her when she was 60, whilst he was 52 and they're still together today.
* Many of my friends mothers are between 55-65 years old, and they all date and engage in date diving almost every night of the week. Apparently, there is a dating site for 55 years and older. Hope they're using protection - then again, none of my business.
* At 11 years, I recall a 2nd cousin of my grandmother's, who was 74 years old with an 18 year old boyfriend. When he'd eventually gotten married after impregnating a village girl , traditional functions became a spectacle, as he would leave his wife's side, choosing to be with the elderly woman for the duration... Being a couple again until the observances were completed, after 100 nights from day of burial. She sent him to his wife, as he didn't want to leave.
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At what point do you just say kitten it? Like you say, nevermind, I'll just read MFP and romance novels and eat dessert any time I want and roll my eyes at people who want to talk about how mean their boyfriends are and how ungrateful their girlfriends are and rest in the knowledge that I've retired from the pursuit permanently.
I've NEVER pursued anyone nor am I into the fuss and the efforts most are accustomed to fulfill. I'd burnt out early with the bother to impress, mindful of propriety, academic performance, multiple income streams and additional career prospects conscious in my teens to prove myself worthy of a man almost 2 decades my senior, until I recognised that his ready-made out-of-marriage family needn't be burdened with a convenient tribal/political match.
My 20s and 30s as an Abstinence until Marriage by choice, had its challenges and contradictions. Working the sexy, only Fort Knoxed No-strike Zone guarded, including the multiple engagements.
I love my Liberating 40s. I don't seek men out, for they pursue me and fortunately, I'm still not at a point in my life, where I'm forced to feel desperate. Then again ... Not a personality trait.
Nevermind is not in my vocabulary.1
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