If I don’t burn 600 calories at the gym it doesn’t “count”
ellioc2
Posts: 148 Member
I know what I’m doing is making me miserable but it’s so hard to ignore this rule. I’m losing strength to push myself and I’m feeling weaker and weaker each time I go. My muscles feel like lead, I feel dizzy but my mind won’t let me stop. Today I felt really horrible but I made myself go on the elliptical for a full hour and I burnt 750 calories. Now I need to go do the strength/weightlifting portion (squats, pull-ups, bent over rows, Romanian dead lifts, crunches). I’m frustrated that I can’t enjoy the exercise and the gym anymore, and that my obsessions are ruining it. I really don’t know how to stop though, or even if I should stop.
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Replies
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Go to the gym, do the elliptical for 5 minutes, then leave. Maybe a few times. Nothing bad will happen and it should set you at ease.5
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It sounds like you need more support than what we can give you. I recommend that you discuss this with your doctor, and seek support from a counsellor.12
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I would definitely recommend speaking to a therapist, especially based on your history and previous posts. Please, you deserve it.10
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I third the recommendation of a therapist. I suggested that yesterday as well.
But really, you don't sound well at all. It is in your best interest to see a therapist and get help for this because your thought processes are not healthy and are clearly interfering with your life. Like I said yesterday, there's no shame in getting help for this, or anything else that matter. That said, for the short term, no you shouldn't continue to workout when you're dizzy.9 -
But you aren't eating enough to support this level of activity, that's why you are losing strength and feeling dizzy. You are harming yourself and people have been telling you to seek help for a while. Please do that.9
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I feel like you keep posting because you need us to say this to you in a different way, but I don't know how else to say it. You need to go to a doctor, you need to speak to a therapist. You are hurting yourself. Your mindset is destructive, you are not seeing yourself or this process clearly. The farther you go down this path, the harder it will be to recover. Please get help.9
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OCD can frequently be controlled with cognitive behavioral therapy. I know it’s difficult to take the step to get help, but it must be miserable to feel out of control of your own thoughts and actions. Please find a psychiatrist or psychologist that can help you take control of your obsessions.3
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All I know is nursing school is starting again in a few weeks and I better shape up, or else it’ll be a miserable quarter. I’m a good student (I got a 4.0 last quarter) but if I can’t focus or I spend too much time with all this dieting stuff, it might really cause my academics to suffer.
One thing I found great about going to school (I'm working toward a Master's degree) is that I could let "all this dieting stuff" continue quietly in the background and focus on my schoolwork instead.
I got in the habit of eating certain things which added up to the calories I needed, and doing a certain amount of exercise, and all that was just ordinary every day life. No worries.
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I feel like you keep posting because you need us to say this to you in a different way, but I don't know how else to say it. You need to go to a doctor, you need to speak to a therapist. You are hurting yourself. Your mindset is destructive, you are not seeing yourself or this process clearly. The farther you go down this path, the harder it will be to recover. Please get help.
I am, and I’m awaiting the appointment with the dietician. I see a therapist and we are working through some issues, but I just feel very lost right now. I see my primary care in a week or so - she’s been handling the psychiatric meds. I don’t know what kind of help I need honestly. All I know is nursing school is starting again in a few weeks and I better shape up, or else it’ll be a miserable quarter. I’m a good student (I got a 4.0 last quarter) but if I can’t focus or I spend too much time with all this dieting stuff, it might really cause my academics to suffer.
Does your therapist know the extent of your feelings with regards to diet and exercise? If not you need to tell them. Also you might (probably) want to see a psychiatrist for your psychotropic med management. They have significantly more training with regards to that than a GP does and you're case isn't especially straight forward.
Additionally this isn't about "shaping up". That's not how mental health issues are worked through. It's about getting the support that you need to help you work through what's going on. That's going to look different for every person, but it is never about shaping up, snapping out of it, pulling yourself up by your bootstraps, etc.9 -
I feel like you keep posting because you need us to say this to you in a different way, but I don't know how else to say it. You need to go to a doctor, you need to speak to a therapist. You are hurting yourself. Your mindset is destructive, you are not seeing yourself or this process clearly. The farther you go down this path, the harder it will be to recover. Please get help.
I am, and I’m awaiting the appointment with the dietician. I see a therapist and we are working through some issues, but I just feel very lost right now. I see my primary care in a week or so - she’s been handling the psychiatric meds. I don’t know what kind of help I need honestly. All I know is nursing school is starting again in a few weeks and I better shape up, or else it’ll be a miserable quarter. I’m a good student (I got a 4.0 last quarter) but if I can’t focus or I spend too much time with all this dieting stuff, it might really cause my academics to suffer.
I have been through earing disorder treatment. A dietician is helpful-but not the lifeline you need right now. Meaning-a dietician is going to be able to help you design an appropate food plan and allow for appropriate levels of exercise for you. That’s likely going to be eating much more than you are, including foods you’ve banned, exercising much less, etc. How many of those things can you do without considerable mental/emotional stress?
I can’t remember if you’ve covered how much of this you’re talking about with your therapist and whether or not your therapist has experience with eating disorders - so I apologize if you’ve shared that in your other threads.
You need to take all of those thoughts and share them with your therapist. He/she needs to know your thoughts on food, your body, exercise, all of it.
And if your therapist doesn’t have some very immediate thoughts/ideas on moving towards treatment or getting you into a program where you can get treatment (that doesn’t mean inpatient-just meaning direct and appropriate care for these specific issues), then please see another therapist.
All of this is fixable. All of the things you’re struggling with will be 100000000 times easier when you get treatment for this. As in-I used to have a lot of similar thoughts that manifested themselves in slightly different behaviors (just a different ED). I went through treatment. None of these things are issues now. I can eat and exercise in appropriate, healthy ways nearly effortlessly.
I want that for you because you deserve it. And you deserve the happiness, peace and ease that comes with it. There is hope. I promise.
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All I know is nursing school is starting again in a few weeks and I better shape up, or else it’ll be a miserable quarter. I’m a good student (I got a 4.0 last quarter) but if I can’t focus or I spend too much time with all this dieting stuff, it might really cause my academics to suffer.
I forgot to mention this earlier, but if and when this starts affecting your academics, you should seriously think about telling your professors. I realize that that is probably beyond scary because I've a. put doing so off for years and b. realized that it was in my best interest to let my professors know what was going on with regards to my (severe) treatment resistant depression. They won't think that you are somehow lesser than you were prior to telling them and I can assure you, they've heard heard a lot from students over the years (or probably even over the quarter). I doubt you telling them would faze them.
Like I said, I realize that that's probably a really scary idea, but it is in your best interest to let your professors know that you're struggling emotionally.4 -
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On top of what the others have said. At that pace you're heading for a physical injury. That could put you out of the gym and possibly daily life for several days to weeks, depending on the severity of the injury. Eventually you're body will defend itself. From the sounds of things you're almost there. Pay a little now with proper rest and recovery or pay alot recovering from injury. Choose to stay healthy...
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Duck_Puddle wrote: »I feel like you keep posting because you need us to say this to you in a different way, but I don't know how else to say it. You need to go to a doctor, you need to speak to a therapist. You are hurting yourself. Your mindset is destructive, you are not seeing yourself or this process clearly. The farther you go down this path, the harder it will be to recover. Please get help.
I am, and I’m awaiting the appointment with the dietician. I see a therapist and we are working through some issues, but I just feel very lost right now. I see my primary care in a week or so - she’s been handling the psychiatric meds. I don’t know what kind of help I need honestly. All I know is nursing school is starting again in a few weeks and I better shape up, or else it’ll be a miserable quarter. I’m a good student (I got a 4.0 last quarter) but if I can’t focus or I spend too much time with all this dieting stuff, it might really cause my academics to suffer.
I have been through earing disorder treatment. A dietician is helpful-but not the lifeline you need right now. Meaning-a dietician is going to be able to help you design an appropate food plan and allow for appropriate levels of exercise for you. That’s likely going to be eating much more than you are, including foods you’ve banned, exercising much less, etc. How many of those things can you do without considerable mental/emotional stress?
I can’t remember if you’ve covered how much of this you’re talking about with your therapist and whether or not your therapist has experience with eating disorders - so I apologize if you’ve shared that in your other threads.
You need to take all of those thoughts and share them with your therapist. He/she needs to know your thoughts on food, your body, exercise, all of it.
And if your therapist doesn’t have some very immediate thoughts/ideas on moving towards treatment or getting you into a program where you can get treatment (that doesn’t mean inpatient-just meaning direct and appropriate care for these specific issues), then please see another therapist.
All of this is fixable. All of the things you’re struggling with will be 100000000 times easier when you get treatment for this. As in-I used to have a lot of similar thoughts that manifested themselves in slightly different behaviors (just a different ED). I went through treatment. None of these things are issues now. I can eat and exercise in appropriate, healthy ways nearly effortlessly.
I want that for you because you deserve it. And you deserve the happiness, peace and ease that comes with it. There is hope. I promise.
I had an eating disorder (anorexia) for 4 years in high school. I restricted but a big part of it was the overexercising compulsively. The difference now though is I actually am overweight BMI-wise and need to lose the weight. I let myself go too far in the other direction (over the course of a couple years). Because i’m overweight, I wouldn’t be diagnosable with anything (just anxiety probably, which already exists in my charts). And I think because my body has the fat (reserves) I’m doing less harm than I would be if I was normal weight or underweight. I wish I could be more normal about my weight loss but this is what I know... and I have a lot of pent up frustration/anger at my body
Low Bodyweight is not a criteria for every eating disorder. Thoughts and behaviors are.
Purging (via exercise or other means) is harmful-regardless of bodyweight.
You CAN be more normal about weight loss.
I really do hope the best for you.8 -
All I know is nursing school is starting again in a few weeks and I better shape up, or else it’ll be a miserable quarter. I’m a good student (I got a 4.0 last quarter) but if I can’t focus or I spend too much time with all this dieting stuff, it might really cause my academics to suffer.
I forgot to mention this earlier, but if and when this starts affecting your academics, you should seriously think about telling your professors. I realize that that is probably beyond scary because I've a. put doing so off for years and b. realized that it was in my best interest to let my professors know what was going on with regards to my (severe) treatment resistant depression. They won't think that you are somehow lesser than you were prior to telling them and I can assure you, they've heard heard a lot from students over the years (or probably even over the quarter). I doubt you telling them would faze them.
Like I said, I realize that that's probably a really scary idea, but it is in your best interest to let your professors know that you're struggling emotionally.
As a professor, let me emphasize this.
First, mental health issues that affect your classroom performance may be covered as a disability under the ADA. (Everything policy-wise I'm going to say applies only to the US.) You should check with your school's disability services office. If this applies to your situation, then the school may be required to provide you with various accommodations that give you equal access on campus.
If your situation falls under the ADA, then the relevant people at your school will probably advise you on how to approach your professors.
Even if you choose not to pursue formal accommodations or don't qualify for them, talk to your professors. Talk to them ASAP, at the very beginning of the semester. Email every professor and ask for an appointment. I promise, we are human. We want to help students learn. Most of us try not to be scary. (Some of us don't succeed.)
Know what sort of help you would like to ask for before your appointment. Be sure you have read the syllabus and any other course documents so you already know what the professor's policies are. If you have formal accommodations, take that paperwork with you. One thing I recommend requesting is a brief regularly scheduled appointment, weekly or perhaps every other week, so you can check in with the professor and make sure you are staying on track. These types of frequent appointments have been very helpful for many of my students who struggle in the classroom.
At the appointment, tell the professor that you are dealing with health concerns that may affect your classroom performance. You don't have to tell them exactly what your health concerns are, although they may ask for documentation from relevant officials, such from your school's disability accommodations office. (I have never required such documentation, but a professor is allowed to do it.)
If things start getting rough, tell your professors at the very first hint of struggle. Speaking for myself and faculty I know, we generally try to work with students by giving extensions, alternative arrangements, etc., if they are requested in advance. I may not be able to make those sorts of accommodations at the last minute. Also, problems with understanding or completing coursework are a LOT easier to deal with when they start than they are a week or two later.
tl;dr Your professors want to help you, but they can't help you if they don't know what you need. Go talk to them right away, and stay in contact with them about your needs throughout the semester. You may also qualify for accommodations under the ADA depending on your specific situation.5 -
tl;dr Your professors want to help you, but they can't help you if they don't know what you need. Go talk to them right away, and stay in contact with them about your needs throughout the semester. You may also qualify for accommodations under the ADA depending on your specific situation.
Thank you for posting that. I mean I've heard essentially the same thing from professors I've had and friends of mine who are professors, but I think your post was really helpful in general.
Now from a student's side let me layout for the OP (and others who may be reading) how this works for me:
I have accommodations from my university's disability resource center (DRC) due to my depression (and anxiety, but the depression takes a bigger toll on me with regards to academics). It was a challenge to get them for reasons I don't need to go into, but it was deemed that the DRC needed to provide these in order to comply with the ADA. Note - the push back was at the administrative level (specifically the DRC), not the faculty level. I should note that most if not all of the documentation that I needed was filled out by my then psychiatrist. In the case of something like an eating disorder, I suspect you'd need your therapist or GP to fill out the paperwork, as opposed to just being assessed at your university (which I think is the case for some diagnoses at my university).
Now that I have accommodations, I log into a website, input the course numbers for the classes that I need accommodations for, and select what accommodations I want - I have different three ones, only two of which I ever use (note taking is there by default but I don't need it and I didn't ask for it). I make sure to have accommodations in most, but not all, of my classes as I know I don't need them in specific classes and one of them isn't applicable when I take online classes. After I submit the online form of sorts, each professor gets notified and I am shown whether or not they've read the notification.
At the beginning of each term I talk to my professors, either during their office hours or I make an appointment, and let them know about the accommodations. This is required at my university. I am not required to tell them why I need them, but I do because I've found that it's more helpful to me if they know what's going on. None of them know all of the details of my situation, but they all know that I have anxiety and depression. I discuss what assignments I think I might need extra time on and also assure them that I will email them as far ahead as I can to let them know that I need to use my accommodations. Sometimes I'm not able to email as far in advance as I'd like, but it's never been an issue. Note this would not be the case if I didn't have accommodations.
Like apullum said, (most) professors want to help their students. That said, they aren't mind readers and if you don't tell them what's going on or that you need help, they can't do anything. In some cases, if you don't have accommodations their hands might also be tied (sometimes for reasons that are out of their control).4 -
Duck_Puddle wrote: »I feel like you keep posting because you need us to say this to you in a different way, but I don't know how else to say it. You need to go to a doctor, you need to speak to a therapist. You are hurting yourself. Your mindset is destructive, you are not seeing yourself or this process clearly. The farther you go down this path, the harder it will be to recover. Please get help.
I am, and I’m awaiting the appointment with the dietician. I see a therapist and we are working through some issues, but I just feel very lost right now. I see my primary care in a week or so - she’s been handling the psychiatric meds. I don’t know what kind of help I need honestly. All I know is nursing school is starting again in a few weeks and I better shape up, or else it’ll be a miserable quarter. I’m a good student (I got a 4.0 last quarter) but if I can’t focus or I spend too much time with all this dieting stuff, it might really cause my academics to suffer.
I have been through earing disorder treatment. A dietician is helpful-but not the lifeline you need right now. Meaning-a dietician is going to be able to help you design an appropate food plan and allow for appropriate levels of exercise for you. That’s likely going to be eating much more than you are, including foods you’ve banned, exercising much less, etc. How many of those things can you do without considerable mental/emotional stress?
I can’t remember if you’ve covered how much of this you’re talking about with your therapist and whether or not your therapist has experience with eating disorders - so I apologize if you’ve shared that in your other threads.
You need to take all of those thoughts and share them with your therapist. He/she needs to know your thoughts on food, your body, exercise, all of it.
And if your therapist doesn’t have some very immediate thoughts/ideas on moving towards treatment or getting you into a program where you can get treatment (that doesn’t mean inpatient-just meaning direct and appropriate care for these specific issues), then please see another therapist.
All of this is fixable. All of the things you’re struggling with will be 100000000 times easier when you get treatment for this. As in-I used to have a lot of similar thoughts that manifested themselves in slightly different behaviors (just a different ED). I went through treatment. None of these things are issues now. I can eat and exercise in appropriate, healthy ways nearly effortlessly.
I want that for you because you deserve it. And you deserve the happiness, peace and ease that comes with it. There is hope. I promise.
I had an eating disorder (anorexia) for 4 years in high school. I restricted but a big part of it was the overexercising compulsively. The difference now though is I actually am overweight BMI-wise and need to lose the weight. I let myself go too far in the other direction (over the course of a couple years). Because i’m overweight, I wouldn’t be diagnosable with anything (just anxiety probably, which already exists in my charts). And I think because my body has the fat (reserves) I’m doing less harm than I would be if I was normal weight or underweight. I wish I could be more normal about my weight loss but this is what I know... and I have a lot of pent up frustration/anger at my body
It’s called atypical anorexia. The sole difference is that you aren’t underweight. You are doing just as much damage to your body — case in point, I’m atypical, and my blood pressure and nutritional labs are in the basement — but you’re starting from a higher weight.
You need help. You need to shiw your therapist what you’ve been writing here.5
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