Harsh on resolutioners....
DanniB423
Posts: 777 Member
I’ve been on MFP for three years. So this doesn’t really pertain to me but I’ve noticed something. On my newsfeed with my friends and my FB, there are a lot of comments about the newbies coming in for January. Comments about how the forums and gyms will be overrun with “new year, new me” people and it’s annoying. Of course resolutions don’t always stick but it really could be the year someone makes a serious life changed forever. Its never bothered me.I guess I don’t really understand the hostility. (Not from all, but many.) Thoughts? Does it bug you?
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Replies
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I don't read my feed, but certainly haven't noticed anything like that on the forums.2
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I don't inherently have an issue with them - I started my weight loss journey in January once upon a time so I get that. My issue comes when folks post about how they're going to lose XX amount of weight in XX amount of time using XX.
I guess it's the same issue I have all year long, it's just magnified in January? I'm supportive of anyone trying to improve their health in a safe and healthy way.5 -
Thanks for your input. Makes sense.VirginiasMom wrote: »I don't inherently have an issue with them - I started my weight loss journey in January once upon a time so I get that. My issue comes when folks post about how they're going to lose XX amount of weight in XX amount of time using XX.
I guess it's the same issue I have all year long, it's just magnified in January? I'm supportive of anyone trying to improve their health in a safe and healthy way.
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I don't have an issue with resolutioners. In theory.
I'm bugged that it becomes next to impossible to get a treadmill this time of year at my gym -- I don't like running in the dark, so I go to the gym after work. I get annoyed when people crowd the treadmills and then do nothing but talk on their phones or to the people next to them the whole time. This seems to ramp up after January 1.
I also do a lot of headdesking at "I'm gonna lose 10 pounds in a month! Tee Hee! OH WHY ISN'T IT WORKING?" talk, but that happens around any major holiday.
My biggest issue is on all of the weight/diet talk that is EVERYWHERE this time of year.
Edit: ESPECIALLY when it's endorsing behaviors that are likely to lead to short-term fast losses that either can't be sustained, or then can't be maintained. And those people are annoying AF when they come back and whine, four or five months later, about how weight loss is sooooooooooooo hard, and how people who are successful must be freaks, and it's just impossible to lose weight.10 -
Doesn't bother me at all. when I belonged to a gym it was just a given that the first few months of the year you better get to class early so you can get a spot, after that it was business as usual. Now that I do my running outdoors and don't belong to a gym it doesn't affect me. but I do think people can be very harsh and I hope, like you, that someone makes a change that sticks for life.2
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It just annoys me because I hate crowds. Last year at this time, I tried going to the gym after work and all the equipment I needed was in use, and people were also standing around waiting. I couldn't even get on a treadmill to pass time because they were all in use too. It was a mad house. I ended up just leaving! I worked out at home for a month and then went back lol.4
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I started October came off healthy eating mid dec and now back to it in Jan. I plan on being on this now all year and on mtp now to help keep on track. I would hope for friends and support Jan or July as everyone starts somewhere x4
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collectingblues wrote: »My biggest issue is on all of the weight/diet talk that is EVERYWHERE this time of year.
Edit: ESPECIALLY when it's endorsing behaviors that are likely to lead to short-term fast losses that either can't be sustained, or then can't be maintained. And those people are annoying AF when they come back and whine, four or five months later, about how weight loss is sooooooooooooo hard, and how people who are successful must be freaks, and it's just impossible to lose weight.
I agree with this.
Thinking about this more, I also think a lot of people (in general, not here specifically or that I've noticed) are down on New Year's resolutions in general. I've heard lots of people saying things like "I resolved to give up resolutions," and I get that, as it's a bit magical thinking to assume that new year means all of a sudden you will be motivated and be able to follow through, and operates somewhat as an excuse to put it off until then (especially when the holidays are coming up).
However, I quite like the concept of resolutions, and find that times of year can feel significant and give some impetus to changes. I actually did start my weight loss in Jan too -- it was New Year's inspired in part, although I delayed really starting until late Jan (2014).2 -
There is kind of a weird negativity with resolutions, but I would never judge someone for wanting to be healthier, no matter when they choose to do it. And it's usually followed by "this won't last" comments, which just suck.
For me personally, I started in the beginning of December on a Thursday. Purposely, because I never do well starting on a Monday or the 1st of the month or the 1st of the year. It's just some mind trickery, like if you only start on a Monday, and you mess up for one meal on Wednesday, you binge until the next Monday. That kept happening to me, so I said screw it and switched things up.
I guess I can see it being a little annoying when the gyms are crowded, but aside from that, people need to learn how to be nice.
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I think my gym is too scary for noobs (bodybuilding/powerlifting focus). Not seeing much of a change.8
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I also started weight loss for the first time at new years (2012). I didn't really consider it a resolution though, I just weighed myself at Christmas and was like omg I need to lose weight, and so I did. I don't have a problem with people doing new years resolutions at all. I think it's an ok concept. Being a new year, it can be a good time to reflect on the past year and what things can you do to make your life better. Like I said I just hate the crowds and all the annoying diet talk.1
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collectingblues wrote: »My biggest issue is on all of the weight/diet talk that is EVERYWHERE this time of year.
Edit: ESPECIALLY when it's endorsing behaviors that are likely to lead to short-term fast losses that either can't be sustained, or then can't be maintained. And those people are annoying AF when they come back and whine, four or five months later, about how weight loss is sooooooooooooo hard, and how people who are successful must be freaks, and it's just impossible to lose weight.
I agree with this.
Thinking about this more, I also think a lot of people (in general, not here specifically or that I've noticed) are down on New Year's resolutions in general. I've heard lots of people saying things like "I resolved to give up resolutions," and I get that, as it's a bit magical thinking to assume that new year means all of a sudden you will be motivated and be able to follow through, and operates somewhat as an excuse to put it off until then (especially when the holidays are coming up).
However, I quite like the concept of resolutions, and find that times of year can feel significant and give some impetus to changes. I actually did start my weight loss in Jan too -- it was New Year's inspired in part, although I delayed really starting until late Jan (2014).
I'm a late bloomer--I started in Feb 2013.1 -
It just annoys me because I hate crowds. Last year at this time, I tried going to the gym after work and all the equipment I needed was in use, and people were also standing around waiting. I couldn't even get on a treadmill to pass time because they were all in use too. It was a mad house. I ended up just leaving! I worked out at home for a month and then went back lol.
Yup, when I had a gym membership I hated this month due to the crowds.
Didn't like any of the gyms in my new city so working out at home these days.0 -
It just annoys me because I hate crowds. Last year at this time, I tried going to the gym after work and all the equipment I needed was in use, and people were also standing around waiting. I couldn't even get on a treadmill to pass time because they were all in use too. It was a mad house. I ended up just leaving! I worked out at home for a month and then went back lol.
This!
I'm in no way directly rude to someone but it IS frustrating when I have limited time (which is always as a mom with 2 young ones and full time job) and I need to really get in and get out. It's nearly impossible to do with the crowds. Also, the incidents of people standing around/sitting on a machine/standing on the treadmill, on their phone during this time of year increases drastically. I'm not a confrontational person so I really don't want to have to ask someone to move if they aren't going to use it...or take the time to go find an employee to have them do it for me which is also super awkward.
Sigggh.5 -
collectingblues wrote: »My biggest issue is on all of the weight/diet talk that is EVERYWHERE this time of year.
Edit: ESPECIALLY when it's endorsing behaviors that are likely to lead to short-term fast losses that either can't be sustained, or then can't be maintained. And those people are annoying AF when they come back and whine, four or five months later, about how weight loss is sooooooooooooo hard, and how people who are successful must be freaks, and it's just impossible to lose weight.
I agree with this.
Thinking about this more, I also think a lot of people (in general, not here specifically or that I've noticed) are down on New Year's resolutions in general. I've heard lots of people saying things like "I resolved to give up resolutions," and I get that, as it's a bit magical thinking to assume that new year means all of a sudden you will be motivated and be able to follow through, and operates somewhat as an excuse to put it off until then (especially when the holidays are coming up).
However, I quite like the concept of resolutions, and find that times of year can feel significant and give some impetus to changes. I actually did start my weight loss in Jan too -- it was New Year's inspired in part, although I delayed really starting until late Jan (2014).
Yup. I don't mind the *concept* of resolutions -- I set some own habits of my own that I want to work on this year -- but let's just say that the stereotype of resolutionists in the weight/exercise schema definitely exists for a reason. And it's those *behaviors* and attitudes that bother me -- because in my experience, it often comes with a sophomoric type expression that I AM NEW AND I AM RIGHT, and it's just like... please. You did not write the book on exercise and weight loss simply because you decided, like gabs of other people, that you want to "better myself" or "live my best life" in the coming year.
Like, someone was just going off on me in a FB group about how NOBODY needs carbs, and that zero and low carbers are out there thriving. I pointed out that well, endurance athletes would beg to differ, and that there's no way I'm running a half marathon without some sort of glucose or carb. She told me I was wrong. I asked her if she was an athlete, and how her performance was. She told me that she didn't care what I thought, and accused me of picking a fight. I told her that I wasn't picking a fight, but that I shouldn't have to defend the concept that some people do live lifestyles that require carbs. She blocked me.
It's like, *kitten*, please.8 -
I'm a grad student, so I go to the university rec center. There isn't really a "slow" time because of the weird student schedules that everyone is on. Even at 6am ROTC invades the place. I do just fine with the moderate crowds. I can almost always get a treadmill or elliptical within a few minutes, otherwise I use the track.
The very beginning of the semester is the worst, January or August. It becomes a social hangout. The regulars are pretty quiet and it's peaceful. The resolutioners are loud and often rude. All the machines are taken, the track is blocked by hoards of friends, no one cleans up after themselves, and I end up in the background of random selfies. NOT A FAN.
I'm all for people working on themselves, but I also want to be able to continue my routine in peace. I can't wait until mid-February when it's back to normal.4 -
I started off a resolutioner and it worked out really well for me. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ There are annoying know-it-all resolutioners, but there's a fair number of annoying know-it-all year-round gym-goers too, some of who somehow feel more entitled to the space despite paying the same fees as everyone else.
Some people are just grumpy about crowds and their anger against resolutioners is misplaced frustration about something nobody (except maybe the gym owners themselves) can fix. I found the crowds pretty annoying too, which lead me to eventually setting up a home/outdoors fitness routine. The only thing I miss about this time of year is seeing some of the wild and sometimes scary ways in which some people decided they wanted to use the equipment. Try as I might, I'll probably never see someone try to lift a loaded barbell in a squat rack with their feet ever again...0 -
My problem is that a flock of newbies don't know the rules. The regulars do. It takes awhile for those that stick around to get with the program. I'm another that likes to get in and out, and when it's crowded that's hard to do.3
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There are annoying know-it-all resolutioners, but there's a fair number of annoying know-it-all year-round gym-goers too, some of who somehow feel more entitled to the space despite paying the same fees as everyone else.
I get this. My post above came off a little like I'd be entitled, but I just don't enjoy the ones that don't consider the people around them. If you've been walking on 2.0mph for 45 minutes and you can see the gym is packed, maybe it's time to give the treadmill up. I'd also never demand someone move from a machine/area just because "I've been coming here longer".
Definitely seen both happen. We should all be aware of our surroundings and try to be considerate of others.
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I have absolutely no problem with people who have started dieting or working out due to resolutions. Everybody starts somewhere and people who have been at the gym for awhile need to learn that flexibility is more than going to yoga class. Learn variations of your exercises using different equipment, pick different cardio machines, change your schedule a bit. The resolutioners show up every year and you can either whine about it or work around it.5
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Every year there will be people making resolutions to start dieting and exercising. Some will stick with it and some won’t. I was one of those that started 6 years ago and stuck with it. We all have to start somewhere. I am cheering them on even though it’s mildly annoying when they clog the trails & parking lots because I know that sadly most of them will not keep at it and will be done showing up around February. As far as the crazy diets go, they will find out sooner or later that they usually don’t work long-term and hopefully find their way to MFP or other forms of calorie counting which does actually work.0
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There are a few self-centered jerks in every crowd, right? That doesn't make it a crowd of self-centered jerks.
Truthfully, I think some fraction of it is just frustrated venting: Some people's circles of friends/family go through an annual cycle of over-enthusiastic January 1 resolutions, click-bait driven strategies, and relatively speedy bail-out, only for some of the very same people to repeat the very same cycle the next year.
If those "some people" are folks who've been successful at weight loss and/or fitness themselves, and have tried to gently give genuine helpful advice (which often is dissonant with the clickbait), and have been rebuffed (sometimes rudely), that can exacerbate the situation.
They may see their gym get crowded for a month every year with starry-eyed people who make their workout a tiny bit more time-consuming or something, and be blowing off steam online in order to save their energy to be friendly and welcoming in person at the gym (one can hope, right? ).
When we vent frustrations (of any sort) on social media, it's common to imagine that we're talking to the like-minded, and not to realize the effect on others who are in a different place. (If I could stop people posting the literal words "Family is what makes life worthwhile" on Facebook at Christmas right in front of people who've just lost immediate family, and are depressed/grieving/maybe suicidal . . . or complaining about stupid trivial things their spouse did, in front of recent widow(ers) . . . !) This is not people showing cruelty or intentional harshness, it's just a common and natural form of unaware thoughtlessness. We implicitly think others think about things like we do.
So, some of it is frustrated venting. Some of it is not thinking through that the whole audience is not in the same place we are. And some of it is a few people being actual jerks.
Just my opinion.
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I’ve been on MFP for three years. So this doesn’t really pertain to me but I’ve noticed something. On my newsfeed with my friends and my FB, there are a lot of comments about the newbies coming in for January. Comments about how the forums and gyms will be overrun with “new year, new me” people and it’s annoying. Of course resolutions don’t always stick but it really could be the year someone makes a serious life changed forever. Its never bothered me.I guess I don’t really understand the hostility. (Not from all, but many.) Thoughts? Does it bug you?
As someone who has spent a lot of time (far too much!) on these forums, there is definitely a certain amount of "Oh geez, brace yourself, it's January again!". But it's not hostility pointed at specific individuals. It's more knowing there will be a ton more volume, and repeated questions and answers, and newbies who have just read all the woo on the internet and are going to drag it all in here
It can be a bit of a challenge, being pulled between wanting to help everyone, and reaching the limit of how many times you can tell people to read the stickies! But I think it's really important to not carry that attitude into the space where all these newbies are, and back away when you've reached your limit, because mixed in with all the people who will be here for a month trying crazy things, telling us we don't know the truth, and then wandering off, are the handful of people who will actually get it this year. I guess some of your friends felt comfortable enough to vent in their newsfeed, but I personally wouldn't have done that because I have some new friends.
I have always disliked NY resolutions in general. I know too many people who make the same resolution every year, never give much thought to HOW, make a huge deal out of it, then forget about it by Jan 31. But I'm not a joiner, and tend to get annoyed by people who do stuff just because everyone else does. My problem, not theirs, for sure.
It's not really hostility most of the time. Just humorous annoyance, something to small talk about instead of the weather.13 -
monkeefan1974 wrote: »Every year there will be people making resolutions to start dieting and exercising. Some will stick with it and some won’t. I was one of those that started 6 years ago and stuck with it. We all have to start somewhere. I am cheering them on even though it’s mildly annoying when they clog the trails & parking lots because I know that sadly most of them will not keep at it and will be done showing up around February. As far as the crazy diets go, they will find out sooner or later that they usually don’t work long-term and hopefully find their way to MFP or other forms of calorie counting which does actually work.
I agree with you 100%
Doesn’t bother me one bit. I was one of those that gave up more times than you can imagine. A lot of people give up on their resolutions early in the year, but there will be some that keep at it, and I am totally happy for them!1 -
I agree, and in my old gym there was a 25 min cardio equipment rule when other people are waiting for the machines to deal with issues like that. As long as they get off the machine in 25 min, they did their bit and I don't really care what they do with the machine for that time.eatingfoodles wrote: »There are annoying know-it-all resolutioners, but there's a fair number of annoying know-it-all year-round gym-goers too, some of who somehow feel more entitled to the space despite paying the same fees as everyone else.
I get this. My post above came off a little like I'd be entitled, but I just don't enjoy the ones that don't consider the people around them. If you've been walking on 2.0mph for 45 minutes and you can see the gym is packed, maybe it's time to give the treadmill up. I'd also never demand someone move from a machine/area just because "I've been coming here longer".
Definitely seen both happen. We should all be aware of our surroundings and try to be considerate of others.
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Since January is the start of the New Year and the end of the holidays, I think people are prone to reset the calendar and their goals for the new year. Even if a person last a month into their fitness goal that's better than nothing. For some, they will drop off due to discouragement or discipline, others will see improvement or just feel better and it will keep them on track for the next day, and the next, until its part of their daily habit. It never bothers me to see new faces when I am working out and I encourage any one to be supportive and helpful to the newbies.
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I agree, and in my old gym there was a 25 min cardio equipment rule when other people are waiting for the machines to deal with issues like that. As long as they get off the machine in 25 min, they did their bit and I don't really care what they do with the machine for that time.eatingfoodles wrote: »There are annoying know-it-all resolutioners, but there's a fair number of annoying know-it-all year-round gym-goers too, some of who somehow feel more entitled to the space despite paying the same fees as everyone else.
I get this. My post above came off a little like I'd be entitled, but I just don't enjoy the ones that don't consider the people around them. If you've been walking on 2.0mph for 45 minutes and you can see the gym is packed, maybe it's time to give the treadmill up. I'd also never demand someone move from a machine/area just because "I've been coming here longer".
Definitely seen both happen. We should all be aware of our surroundings and try to be considerate of others.
If people did that, we'd be golden. I wish we could get a half hour rule started here.1 -
I see most of this as venting in anticipation....similar to shopping around the holidays. I've been in gyms most of my life and have never seen anything close to intimidation. On the forums its more frustration at battling the massive amounts of misinformation and woo.
I was never much of a resolutioner. The simple fact that so many would start at the most populated time of the year likely discourages more than it encourages.
Personally I love them. Keeps my membership payments low.4 -
Some people are just grumpy about crowds and their anger against resolutioners is misplaced frustration about something nobody (except maybe the gym owners themselves) can fix.
I'm grumpy about crowds (although I can vary my timing and avoid them), but that's not the same as being angry at the resolutioners themselves.
As I said in another thread, I see it as being similar to being annoyed at the crowds if I have to go to crowded store in December -- it's annoying, but I'm not blaming the others there or taking it out on them.
I don't think venting about the resolution phenomenon or crowds = being mean to individuals.5
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