FEEL LIKE GIVING UP
shanelhall993
Posts: 2 Member
well, I have hit my usually spot where I lose all faith and determination in ever being fit. I just want to give up as much as I know I shouldn’t. Someone please help me stay focused!
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Replies
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Tell me about yourself. When did you start? Have you lost weight? inches? gone down in dress sizes?1
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Often the desire to give up can be linked to a person having goals that are too aggressive. Everyone wants the weight gone yesterday, but slow & steady really does win the race. What is your weekly weight loss goal set at? 2 lbs/week is really only for those with >75 lbs to lose, and even then, 1 lb/week might be more sustainable for a person. Are you imposing unnecessary restrictions on yourself, eliminating foods, or only eating "healthy"? A sustainable diet makes room for the foods we love, in the proper portions. Are you forcing yourself to do exercises that you hate? Don't do that. If you choose to exercise, choose things you enjoy or at least have some interest in doing.
Have reasonable goals & expectations, focus on day-to-day achievements (logging consistently, hitting your calorie goal, getting in a certain number of steps) and then relax & be patient
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Perhaps you are unhappy with where you are.
Consider though that you started the process and that implies you were unhappy with where you were.
So if quitting means always being unhappy, and continuing has at least a possibility of being happy with the result, it seems continuing holds the best odds.9 -
I like the questions @try2again asked, so if you answer those you'll not only help yourself but help others to give you some tips and ideas.
Also, you've identified your issue: you reach a certain point and give up. Think of it as a rock on your path. You've tripped over that same rock a couple times now (don't worry, we all have!) but now you KNOW about the rock. Now you can take measures to side-step it. That's where habits and consistency come into play. Keep going down the path with minimal trips and stumbles and you'll reach your goal.2 -
shanelhall993 wrote: »well, I have hit my usually spot where I lose all faith and determination in ever being fit. I just want to give up as much as I know I shouldn’t. Someone please help me stay focused!
I've been there. What you have to ask yourself is how do you expect to ever get fit if you give up after just a couple weeks. I'm not saying this to be mean. I have to ask myself the same question when I lose motivation. This is a long process. You need to find methods are both enjoyable and sustainable for you. You will have days where you just don't care and start to slip into old habits, but you also need to have days where you force yourself to stay on track regardless of motivation. Because it will be so worth it in the end. With enough time and consistency, the days of no motivation will become fewer and your current methods will become habit.4 -
I remind myself that I don't need perfection. I don't need a perfect, skinny body - I just need to make healthy choices as much as possible.
When you realize that it's not all or nothing, that each meal rests on its own merits, that good choices add up and that real life happens, it's much, much easier.
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shanelhall993 wrote: »well, I have hit my usually spot where I lose all faith and determination in ever being fit. I just want to give up as much as I know I shouldn’t. Someone please help me stay focused!
I've been there. What you have to ask yourself is how do you expect to ever get fit if you give up after just a couple weeks. I'm not saying this to be mean. I have to ask myself the same question when I lose motivation. This is a long process. You need to find methods are both enjoyable and sustainable for you. You will have days where you just don't care and start to slip into old habits, but you also need to have days where you force yourself to stay on track regardless of motivation. Because it will be so worth it in the end. With enough time and consistency, the days of no motivation will become fewer and your current methods will become habit.
^This. Most long-time users on here who have been successful at weight loss and maintenance will tell you it's less about motivation and more about building lasting habits (small ones, over time) that carry a person through when they are not so motivated.2 -
I like the questions @try2again asked, so if you answer those you'll not only help yourself but help others to give you some tips and ideas.
I'm afraid @StephanieBrocious deserves the credit for those questions
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I look at it like getting lost on a road trip. When you get lost, you don’t have to go all the way back to your starting point, just pull over, look for guidance and go back on your way!! You’ve got this!17
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@shanelhall993 What usual spot is that? If, as I suspect, it was the January 31 spot, you'll have a new chance to live the next day. Please choose to.1
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@shanelhall993 - I've been there. Since 2014. And each time I regretted not sticking with the journey. The weight loss journey is a wonderful one. I've been there and been successful. The journey brings you to dark places, but most importantly, bring you to so many new and wonderful places where you experience things your wouldn't if you give up.
I have a proverb I tell myself when I want to give up: "The Day You Plant The Seed Is NOT The Day You Eat The Fruit". You nurture a plant by watering, feeding and tending after the plant. You need to do the same to yourself. Don't give up because after 4 weeks you're not at the end-goal. Nurture yourself and you'll reap the rewards.7 -
Don’t give up my dear. We all have them days. I don’t know what type of eating plan you are on, but maybe you just need to change things a bit. The main thing is to eat healthy, use portion control and try to fit exercise into your week. Please make sure to it’s O.K. With your doctor if you have any health problems. It helps me to remember that I am not on a diet I have chosen a healthier lifestyle. When we eat healthy we feel better. Hang in there you can do this. 😊0
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If you feel like you want to give up, just remember the reason you started in the first place! Nobody said it was going to be easy, but if you push through it, you’ll be happy you did! Best of luck0
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OP, I wanted to come back and mention something either for your benefit or that of lurkers. Something that has helped me and others not to get overly discouraged is to know your maintenance number. Experimentally, adjust your settings to "maintain current weight" and see how many calories MFP gives you (then you can change it back). Now you can know that, any time you are under that number, you are making progress and if you have a particularly bad day, you may realize the damage isn't as bad as you thought. It truly is a marathon and not a sprint and doesn't require perfection at all.
Have any of these thoughts people have shared been helpful, OP? 5 -
A year from now you'll be glad you started (or, actually, didn't quit) today. Try to focus less on your ultimate goal and more on what you're doing day to day. Trust the process.3
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you have the right to feel unmotivated, fed up.. done. Just push through WE all have bad days..the key is to just keep going.. ..hold fast..and keep with your plan. Tweak it for the long haul. Eat food you like, learn how to cook low cal foods you enjoy. If you exercise ..don't over do it.. and do something you enjoy. It takes time to shed pounds..it never happens fast enough..but it does happen. The body is complicated and wonderful.it doesn't lose on demand. Be logical.. this will work for you.. don't give up. you'll be mad at yourself.2
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I've been trying this for months and I've felt this way non stop so I understand . Just know we're all here and more people understand what you're going through than you know. I believe in you and just keep going. Lots of love xx3
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Just wanted to say I hope you didn't give up and are rocking your fitness journey today! You deserve to be healthy and happy that you didn't give up.
If you didn't rock it today, tomorrow it a new day and you totally got this.0 -
The hardest thing to achieve and also the one that you need most is doing what you have to do to achieve your personal goals while perceiving that the pressure your put yourself in to reach it will certainly make you more distant from it. Once you noticed that this previously unconscious self judgment that made you believe that you needed to be better is harming, you can now look at the facts:
1) You’re already good enough the way you are
2) If you want body changes, go for it, but because you will become different, not better. Don’t forget that the people with amazing successful stories, bodies, cars, companies, etc still are people and nobody is more than nobody. Reaching this realization takes off lots of pressure.
3) The stress and pressure made you doubt of yourself because “you weren’t seeing results”. And this same doubt made you slip more than you should. Yes, you read that right, you are allowed to slip, and by knowing this, you will act less impulsively.
Be calm and be strong! Hope I’ve been helpful.
Edit: And, of course, listen to mr. try2again1 -
Hope you didn't give up! I've had those days too, it isn't easy. There's only one surefire way to ensure failure= giving up. So, stick with it! You can do this! Sometimes, you gotta just take it one day at a time, any more than that is overwhelming and that's ok. The community is here for support.1
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Shameless plug for my own thread from a couple of years ago:
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10478105/feeling-like-youre-ready-to-give-up/p1
Don't give up, OP! We all stumble and fall, sometimes many times, along the way. You don't fail unless you don't get up again.
It's not an easy journey, even for those who only have a few pounds to lose. And none of us are perfect! Just try to aim for more "good days" than "bad days" (and I'm talking in terms of your calorie goal, not the type of foods you eat), and you'll get there in the end.
(For the record, I've been here since January 2016. I've lost most of the weight I wanted to lose (70lbs so far), but I still have 10-12lbs to go and the last few are a struggle. MFP gives me the tools I need to succeed, I just need to use them consistently! ) 0 -
Shameless plug for my own thread from a couple of years ago:
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10478105/feeling-like-youre-ready-to-give-up/p1
Don't give up, OP! We all stumble and fall, sometimes many times, along the way. You don't fail unless you don't get up again.
It's not an easy journey, even for those who only have a few pounds to lose. And none of us are perfect! Just try to aim for more "good days" than "bad days" (and I'm talking in terms of your calorie goal, not the type of foods you eat), and you'll get there in the end.
(For the record, I've been here since January 2016. I've lost most of the weight I wanted to lose (70lbs so far), but I still have 10-12lbs to go and the last few are a struggle. MFP gives me the tools I need to succeed, I just need to use them consistently! )
Thanks for reminding me of this, Sue! I can't believe I didn't have it bookmarked. Definitely will be linking it on other threads 1 -
YOU CAN DO IT! We've all hit that plateau and wanted to give up. It's OK if you take a day, and readjust your goals.
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